Of what i'm about to tell you

Is an inspiration

Not by songs

By my mom..

She has been through a lot...

A lot.....her sisters probs(they're good now) to her and her lil sis..
Having to do shit by herself and no help from anybody..

And she's been blamed and threatened as my dad barely had enough money and had another daughter with another woman

She went through a big depression even when she had me..

And she still is now

I've been crying myself to sleep

Seeing her like this

It feels like

I have a bunch of besties in depression

That wanna kill themselves and hurt themselves and hurt themselves emotionally by words
By family

I have

Still having it today with my dad's mom trying to have my whole family turn on me and my mom
My mom's mom working her ass off to keep her house and struggling
My mom's big step sister having depression as she just split with her husband as she still struggles as that asshole tries to get to her
He's still my uncle....and their two young adult kids have to deal with their dad having already move on as their mom broken into pieces

My dad drinking 5-10 beers

Drinking himself to death
My uncle having to tell me 'dont make this family a disappointment'
Me trying to help all the people in deppression

Even tho i'm in it too
Heart aches
Visuals
Going insane(i have since i was little little)
My heart problems
My eye
My tics(a problem that makes me go into deep thought and shake constantly)
Having to hear people call me names
Even my friends cause of me..
But i ignore all of it

Listen-
If ur being called names
By people
Friends
Even family
Ignore it.
Those words are just words
They have meanings
Bu those meanings are nothing.
They have no evidence to prove your that.
They say those things to make them have power for themselves
You have to restrain them from having that power.
Thats what i do.
I've been bullied since pre-school
Having to be pushes around with words
Having people that were my 'friends' stab me in my back
And there was about 50 and more that did that to me. A lot.
I knew everybody at my old school
Most of them turned my back on me
Every crush took advantage of me
My 'friends' would get close to my crushes and start dating them
I only had two true friends at that school
Lyric and Samantha
They were always there when i needed them the most..

But still today im still blamed for everything
Put down
Having to see and see texts about deppression and it hurts 100x the pain in my heart having to cry inside to see people having to deal with problems like me
But what i do

I stay strong
And i wish for all of you to do the same
Stay strong for everybody
And let them know ur not alone

And plus
If any of you have any problems
U can always talk to me
I'm here for each one of you
Message me or anything
I'm here

I always will

I care for you all
With all mi coraźon

I love u
I never want to let u go

Ur all my family
I dont want u to leave
U mean so much to me

I'll break if u do
..i care for all of you...

'You may think ur Alone when ur not'
'I'll always fight for you. I'll protect you. I may not be THERE for you to see but i always am'
'I may be WEAK but that doesn't mean anything'
'I may seem fine but i actually am blue inside. But i stay strong for the ones by my side'
'I may not look like the other people, but I'm still the person i was made to be'
'That person you loved and you still love that person, doesn't know what she/he is missing on'
'These Scars are the scars that I received as i fought for you'
'I have your back till the very end'
'I'm always here'

I am
And i will