|Finally, you've given me a reason to be strong|
|As long as I can always keep you safe
I've gotta be strong|

"My momma was told most of her life that she had anger issues. I say that the people who said it must have never lived in a world of where you've had so much pain brought unto you that you just snap. I remember her telling me about the first time she got angry and it still interests me 'till this day...." ~Antares "Taylor" Sirius Black

Year: 1970, London, Britain
Setting: The Longbottom Palace

this one is unedited. if u want to read more about the situation , go to adoretanjiro and read chapter
three in beatific.

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Anger. What is anger? What causes anger? What pushes anger? Is it someone repeatedly tapping you after you told them to stop? Is it someone constantly pushing your buttons after you told them to stop? Is it having too much on your plate and you're tired of having to do everything? Is it seeing your bestfriend buy the outfit you wanted after you told her it was the perfect one for you?

Well, none of these are the definition of what Susan is feeling. None of these matches what happened that caused her to become so angry. Susan found herself having battles with herself on which feeling she felt the most:

Pain. Anger. Pain. Anger. Pain. Anger. Pain. Anger. Pain. Anger. Pain. Anger. Pain.

These are the two emotions that Susan feels. But at the moment, all she is feeling is anger. Anger is a strong feeling of annoyance, displeasure, or hostility.

It's when someone provokes it inside of you.

It's that feeling that you get when you're tired of the same shit. It's that feeling that you get when you're tired of the world's shit. It's that feeling that you get when you're tired of shit happening. It's that feeling that you get when you're tired period. And that's what Susan is feeling. She's tired of them. She's been with them for five and a half years now. She's tired of their shit. It all started in November and she's been trying to contain her anger since then. She's fucking tired of them. They have caused her so much pain and she has dealt with it all just to keep a roof over her brother's head. But now... it's different.

They have turned that pain into anger and nobody wants to meet angry Susan.

What type of anger is she feeling?

There are different types of anger.

Type 1: Assertive anger. This is usually the best way to communicate feelings of anger because anger is expressed directly and in a nonthreatening way to the person involved.

Type 2: Behavioural anger. People with behavioural anger usually confront whatever is making them angry.

Type 3: Chronic anger. This anger is most often pervasive, evidenced in the work place, in relationships and in daily life. It reflects an on-going proneness to become angry as well as a general attitude of hostility.

Type 4: Judgmental anger. People with this type of anger often have low self-esteems and they express their anger by putting others down in public to make them feel better about themselves.

Type 5: Overwhelmed anger. These people are so wrapped up in their anger that they can't take it anymore. They have difficultly with expressing this anger so they just bottle it up.

Type 6: Passive-aggressive anger. Pasive aggression is the indirect expression of anger by someone who is uncomfortable or unable to express his or her anger or hurt feelings honestly and openly. Passive aggression can also spring from caretakers who treated anger like it was always on the emotional "no" list.

Each anger comes from different situations. Situations that one individual cannot handle. Situations that one young individual does not need to be in. Situations that one young individual should not have worry about. The keyword here is 'young'.

A young person should not be feeling or expressing any of these types of anger. Why? Because they're young. They're basically still little. They're toddlers. They're children.

But there is one person feeling all of these angers all in one:

Susan Longbottom

She feels the first one. She feels the second. She feels the third one. The fourth one. The fifth one. And the sixth one.

She's slowly but surely losing her mind in this house and she's only 10-Years-Old.

Another minute in this house and she just might kill herself. She's been wanting to kill herself for some time now. She couldn't handle this house. She couldn't live here anymore and she knew that. She was driving herself crazy.

She was just so tired.

There were days the tiredness came in both forms, physical and mental. Her body needed to rest yet her mind needed it to move, to burn the anxiety right out. She kept herself pushing for her brother.

But yet she knew she wanted to end it all. But only Frank was keeping her from doing that and the fear of death. She has thanatophobia. A fear of death and or/one's own mortality.

But what caused this? What happened that filled her with anger? What did Evenly do that made her go from pain to anger? What happened in November? Do you want to travel back a few months before?

Well, let's see......

|The Longbottom Palace|
|November 3rd, 1969|

Susan's right hand struggled, the young girl trying to pull a few hair strings out the zipper. Her aunt forced her into wearing it as Frank gave her a 'help me' look when he walked past her bedroom with their uncle. Today was the annual get together for all the Pure-blooded families Evelyn and Alfie knew. Once again, Susan greeted them 'gratefully' and was thrown back into her bedroom, as is tradition.

"This stupid dress," She grumbled, a feeling of hatred sinking deep inside of her.

Everytime she gets thrown back into here she thinks about that boy with grey eyes who had got her in trouble... she hated him now because of that. However, this time she met an odd witch named Reñe Li. The girl was tossed outside by her parents - being too 'embarrassing' in their words.

"I know that feeling," Susan mumbled when the incident happened.

She believed that was the same girl Frank enjoyed taking piano lessons with and the same girl the grey-eyed boy had told her about during their 'conversation.' Susan said nothing about it since it wasn't her business and she knew her aunt would kill her for stepping out of line. Her aunt. How, oh how, she was getting tired of worrying about what she would do to her. But yet, Susan didn't have the confidence to step up to her.

At this sudden thought, she knew it was time to distract herself. She grabbed her drawing notebook from under her closet's door and sat in the corner of her bedroom, ready to finish off the light bulb she was drawing. Unlike her other drawings, this one felt dull.

She started to feel dull overtime after being in this house. She hated them. She hated their fake smiles and their fake lies. She hated how they treated her indifferently. She hated how they were causing her brother to stress. She hated how they gave him anxiety. She purely hated them. So, Susan drew. She drew even when her hand hurted from trying to shield herself from her uncle's belt. She drew even when her arms hurted from getting beaten or gripped tightly. She drew even when her head ached from her hair getting yanked too much. She drew when her body ached from getting slammed everywhere. She drew even when her mind told her not to.

She drew because that was all she knew how to do.

She didn't really know if not being able to attend the party bothered her this time. A part of her still wanted to cry since she was being treated like a disease but the other part of her still heard her mum's voice telling her not to think about it. She didn't really listen to that other part because her aunt voice interrupts it and reminds her how worthless and disappointing she was.

Then the other side remembering what her mum said in her will about her being beautiful and showboating the fact that she's the first Half-blood born into the Longbottom family. Having battles with herself was something that Susan was now doing over and over again. She fought with herself about her feelings more than usual. She cried more and more and her aunt made fun of her for it.

But no matter how many times she cried, she never cried in front of Frank. She made sure she never cried in front of her little brother. That was a big no-no to Susan.

Back to the point: Susan continued to draw and sighed once more like she's been doing.

'I wonder did I do something? I wonder if I deserve this? I'm not happy anymore. Everything I do earns me a beating. I get called out of my name for no reason. I get talked down on like I'm nothing. I don't even know what happiness means. I only know what pain means. Maybe I deserve this? Maybe I did something but cannot remember? Maybe I'm just worthless? I would've been a worthless daughter to mum and dad. I would have. I just know it.' Susan blinked away the tears at the thought.

She continued to draw, minus her blurry vision, until she heard a knock on her bedroom door.

'It better not be that boy again. He got me into big trouble the last time he came in here. I'm kicking him out this time.' Susan thought and went back to her drawing.

You can call her selfish for her way of thinking but can you really blame her?

She didn't know that boy one bit and she wasn't about to risk her life just so he can hide away from his family.

She was tired of all the beatings and she was slowly starting to feel like she deserved them. Surely she never got an answer whenever she asked them why did they beat her so much. They usually replied with 'you deserve it' or 'you ruined the family's name'.

It pained Susan to think that she would've been an embarrassment to her mum and dad. It pained her to know that she wrecked the family's name. It pained her to know that The Longbottom's would get laughed at because she was born. She was an embarrassment. She was.

She has to come to the reality that she was an embarrassment to her parents and she was an embarrassment to their family.

She was an embarrassment to the Wizarding World. She was an Half-blood in the 60s. She was basically causing her family to be laughed at just by being alive. Alive. She's alive. That's the problem right there. She's alive. She should die. But she couldn't die. She couldn't leave Frank, "I'm sorry for being born. I'm sorry for causing your problems. I'm sorry I'm the reason why everyone hates you, too. Frank, I'm sorry that I'm causing you to witness this," She whispered to herself and gripped the drawing pen in her hand before sniffing.

She was not about to ruin her drawing for her father by letting a single tear drop on it.

She's caused too many problems for him already, she didn't want to add any more to it by ruining an drawing for him. Then she'll just be an disappointment.

Susan heard a few more knocks but she ignored them, "Go away," She muttered and the knocks turned into banging.

Susan jumped up and looked at the door fearfully. She didn't move but she stared at it with fear.

Banging reminded her of Alfie banging on any doors that she was hiding behind before he kicked it down and basically dragged her out. She hated banging on doors.

'Speak. Speak stupid. Speak!' Susan thought but no words came out of her mouth.

She was frozen in shock and couldn't move an muscle, "Anne! Please open up!" Frank voice pleaded, his voice full of distress. Hearing this made Susan get out of her bed in a hurry.

'I swear if they did anything to my brother.' She thought and unlocked the door before swinging it open.

She pulled him inside and closed it before locking it once again. If he was running from anybody they were not going to get him.

Frank sniffed and rubbed his wrist before Susan turned him around to face her, "What's wrong?" She asked him, getting down to business.

Frank looked down before sitting down on the edge of her bed. He said nothing before he held his arm out so she can look at his wrist. Susan bent down and her eyes widened at the blueish color on his wrist that looked recent letting her know that it had to just happen.

Telling from how she's been getting abused day and night, she knew he had to forcefully be getting gripped for it to turn this color... meaning they did the one thing she warned them to not do. Susan hand twitched a little. Not only did her hand start twitching at this thought, her right eye as well.

They touched her little brother.

They basically put their hands on her little brother. It's one thing to make her feel like she's an embarrassment, but don't you ever put your hands on her little brother, "Who did this to you, Frank? Was it them? Please tell me it was them. I want it to be them!" She asked him and Frank continued to look down, not saying a word. He didn't want to tell her because he didn't know what the outcome would be of this.

And not knowing scared him.

Susan lifted his head up a little, "Frank, who did this to you? You can tell me," She repeated and he sniffed again, muttering Evelyn's name.

Susan heard that loud and clear and jumped up, "Anne, wait!" Frank exclaimed when she unlocked the door and swung it opened.

Susan looked back at him, "Stay here," She told him and marched out before he could say a word.

Lanky looked up at Frank with worried eyes and Frank pushed her aside before running after his older sister. This was it.

This was the moment that would change her forever.

This was the moment that Susan has been waiting for but didn't know it. The moment where she switched from sadness, pain and disappointment to anger. She felt anger fill up inside of her. Where did it come from? Where has it been? Why didn't it come earlier? Why has it been hiding?

It came from the fact that Susan has been dealing with their shit day and night and all she asked was for them to not touch her brother. It came from the fact that Susan was fed up with them thinking that she was so weak that they could put their hands on her brother.

It came from the fact that Susan has been protecting Frank since 1965 and she wasn't just about to have them punking him out and making him believe that he was weak.

She wasn't about to have them thinking they're just going to do her brother like they've been doing her. She wasn't about to have that. That's her blood. That's her little brother. That's her bestfriend. That's someone you don't fuck with because Susan do not play about him. Abuse her. That's fine.

But touch Frank and it's an entirely different story.

It's been buried down inside of her because she had no true reason to show it. It almost came out once when she yelled at Evelyn but it went away quickly when she thought about Frank. And it's back. It's back and it's here to stay. She had many reasons to be angry. She had infinity reasons to be angry. And them putting their hands on Frank was one of them. She was tired. She was done with them. She just thought about how scared he must have been and that made her angry. You can say her anger came fast. You can say it came too slow. But it doesn't matter. Her anger came because Evenly decided to put her hands on Frank. Her anger came from faking like everything was fine all the time. She was tired of it.

And it was about time she showed it.

Susan stormed up to Evelyn, ignoring the looks from the other families, and pushed her. Yeah, she pushed her.

She pushed her hard enough to where Evelyn fell down, "WHY DID YOU TOUCH HIM?!" She screamed and all eyes were on them.

Evelyn was clearly shock telling from her reaction but she managed to force a fake laugh while Alfie shot daggers at Susan.

Evelyn laughed like it was nothing. She got back up and brushed herself off, trying to keep her cool.

Martina sipped her drink and muttered something to her husband with an eye roll following behind it.

"What do you mean, dear?" She asked her and Susan dug her finger nails into the palm of her hands. The fact that Evelyn was putting on this front was pissing her off. 'And yet I'm the embarrassment when we have witches like her in the family.' Susan thought angrily.

Alfie tried grabbing Susan arm to take her away but she snatched herself away from him. "YOU TOUCHED FRANK! I'VE SEEN THE BRUISE ON HIS WRIST!!! YOU TOUCHED MY BROTHER!" She screamed.

Her screaming was loud enough to shake the Heavens and the Earth. If her eyes weren't enough to scare you than her voice sure was.

She was basically shaking now. The anger inside her built up more and more. She's been through too much to just let her fake like she's crazy. Susan isn't crazy. She's been going through emotional, physical and basically mental abuse for five and a half years and Evenly wanted to laugh it off? There's nothing humorous about their sickening ways.

They deserved to be electrocuted.

"Who are you yelling at, Susanne?" Evelyn asked her in a deadly whisper. Susan stepped up to her and some gasped.

"You,"

Susan looked Evelyn in her eyes and Evelyn did a small chuckle before leaning down to face her, "Well, you've obviously lost your ever loving living mind. Now you might think you're big and bad because we have company but I'll show you how weak and worthless you are when they're all gone. Your brother talked back so I had to threaten him like I'm threatening you. I suggest you go back to your bedroom and lock yourself away before I slap you in front of everyone. And maybe even slap him along the way just to make you really feel bad," She whispered and smirked.

Susan slowly did two nods and backed away.

The grey-eyed boy pulled some younger boy standing next to him closer by his arm and started backing away himself.

He knew that walk wasn't good.

'Okay. You wanna play?' Susan thought and sped walked to the table with the vase on it. She met eyes with the boy that she gave the drawing to but said nothing since she was technically pissed at this point.

Apparently it wasn't getting through her aunt's head that she did not play about her brother so she had to show them.

Evelyn screamed for her to go to her bedroom but instead Susan grabbed the vase and threw it at her. Everybody gasped and the witches surrounding Evelyn ducked with her, "I PROTECTED HIM MY WHOLE LIFE AND YOU THINK IT'S OKAY TO BRUISE HIM?! YOU THINK IT'S OKAY TO START ABUSING HIM FOR YOUR OWN SICK MATTERS?! NO! YOU HAVE THINGS TWISTED, EVELYN!" She screamed and grabbed another vase before throwing it at her.

Evelyn ducked in time and screamed out for her to go to her bedroom again, starting to feel a little bit scared.

Frank peeked into the Ball Room from around the corner with tears in his eyes. Susan grabbed a glass drink and threw it at her. She felt so mad. She felt so angry. She felt pissed. It seemed that this was all pointless but it really wasn't. All she asked was that they never touched Frank. They've been beating on her for years now and she never asked them for anything except that they never touched Frank.

She felt like it was her duty to protect her little brother and that's what she's been doing. She wasn't going to stop letting her brother know that if anybody did something to him that he should come to her. She was going to protect him until the day she died.

She felt hot and her heart beat was speeding up. Her muscles felt tight and she felt herself shaking. She felt like screaming or running away. This anger was something serious, something to not be played with.

Maybe it was because she swallowed that anger when it was a fire-seed and forgot to drink something cool, and so it grew in her belly until it came out as hot as any dragon has ever flamed.

Alfie stepped up. "Susanne Longbottom, you are embarrassing the family! Go to your room!" He screamed and she scoffed before throwing a glass plate at him.

He used his hands to hit it away from him but it ended up getting a piece stuck inside of the palm of his right hand.

Walburga rushed over to Evelyn, "Thank you for inviting us but we must-" she started but a glass flew her way.

The boy smirked at the sight of his mother hitting the ground and Susan felt hot tears feel up in her eyes from how angry she was and screamed before lashing out.

Frank watched his sister and felt like this was his fault. Susan threw more glasses at Evenly and Alfie. She picked up one of the fire place woods and threw it at Evenly which hit her in the head. She rushed over to another glass vase and threw it at Evenly once she hit the ground. She kept throwing and throwing until she didn't have anything left.

After Susan was done, her breathing was shaky and she had short breaths. The entire Ball Room was quiet and everyone was frozen in shock while watching the young girl. Some were even afraid to move feeling as if they did than they'd get hit as well.

Frank stepped out into view, "Anne, are you okay?" He asked softly and he feelt the lump in his throat. His eyes didn't leave her body and they became glazed with a glassy layer of tears. Susan head turned towards her sweet little brother. She bit her lip tightly in attempt to hide any sound that wanted to escape from her mouth; her heart sank.

The black-head glared at their aunt and uncle --- knowing this was their fault --- before running over to him and hugging him. Frank cried on to her shoulder and she held him. His lower lip quivered as words slowly made their way out of his mouth. "I didn't mean to make you angry. I'm sorry." He cried and Susan realized her brother saw it all. And once again she caused him to worry about her. She had to learn how to control herself so she wouldn't be the cause of why Frank was crying on her shoulder.

She had to learn how to control her angry and kept it put away. And Susan will. She will learn how to.

But all it will take is for one Hogwarts student to push her button........

|Thank You For Reading|

Author's Note: I'm not going to lie, I basically rushed through this entire chapter so there will be many mistakes. At first I was going to have Evenly find Susan's drawing pad and rip it into shreds but I've decided to save that for later. I tried my best with this and did you guys notice how fast Susan feelings switched when it came to Frank? She doesn't play about Frank and she was only 10 so I couldn't have her doing much but she was throwing shit at them. She was full of so much built up anger that has been forming since her parents died. She hasn't even let all of it out but she's going to learn how to control it so she wouldn't be the caused for Frank's tears. I know this chapter isn't the best but I at least tried and well, capturing this moment was hard for me. But it'll get better. Susan was working on an light bulb drawing in this chapter also that was created for her dad while she thought about how much of an embarrassment she was. Now the light bulb represents how ideal her father was and how many ideas the man came up with. He was very studious and curious and Susan just loved her father very much. Sadly, she didn't get a chance to finish it because she lashed out but what she got done so far was perfect.

Susan's drawing for this chapter:

Extra note: The trees and the roots represented the woods since that was the last place she saw her father. She clearly misses him very much and not a day goes by where she doesn't wish they were there. But she knew her wishes would never come true so she might as well stop wishing. But once again I hope you all enjoyed.

Question: What are your thoughts about this chapter?

|Love You All|