HEARING DAMAGE
ADULT NOLA - CHAPTER THIRTY !

            "I SEE YOU STILL aren't wearing the clothes that were no doubt given to you." Annie somewhat jestingly commented as she settled into a slow walk next to the Scatorccio woman, who had yet to change from her negativity filled clothing of the past and into the heliotrope coloured set of pants and a shirt that everyone else at Camp Green Pine wore.

            Her clothing instead consisted of the colour black, symbolising a feeling of darkness and emptiness. Annie didn't need to be the smartest person in the room to recognise that Natalie's choice of clothing was her way of expressing just how lost, lonely and fucked up she felt.

            The black haired woman faltered in her steps for just a moment as she dealt with the surprise of seeing Annie appear out of nowhere. She quickly forced away the raise in her eyebrows and the slack of her jaw as she shrugged her shoulders and sarcastically began to quip. "I'm not really one for engaging in cult--"

            Annie was quick to cut her off. "Intentional community." She stated sharply and with a frown. She didn't appreciate hearing her put down the very place and community that had helped her deal with her past or lack thereof. With a small sigh she continued. "Believe it or not, every single person here sought out Charlotte, not the other way around. We were all dealing with some seriously shitty things and here, we can begin to heal from all that stuff."

The two women had come to a complete stop. Natalie's greyish-blue eyes peered over at the March woman whose shoulders had fallen in defeat as she spoke yet again. "You and Charlotte clearly know each other and you obviously have some reason to not like her, I don't really care but please, just don't put down this place. At least not without giving it a real chance first."

The deepest crease appeared between Natalie's eyebrows. The woman found herself so tempted to tell Nola to just go fuck herself just like she had so many times in the past but...well, that wasn't really Nola anymore. She didn't remember anything, didn't remember her or any horrid, stomach curdling thing they had gone through together.

She could have said no, normally she would have and if it had been Lottie asking her, then she definitely would have said no but as Nola stood there, peering over at her with her big brown eyes and that stupid, hopeful half smile, Natalie couldn't help but roll her eyes and grumble out, "And how would you suggest I do that?"

Annie's smile of hope morphed into a grin of success. "We have activities that you could sign up for." She suggested as she waved her hand in the direction of the main centre. A hearty chuckle left her lips. "Or you could just wear the clothes you were given like the rest of us. They're not gonna burn the ones you're wearing, you know."

          Natalie couldn't help but let out the smallest of laughs. It was faint, just barely audible but it was there. She found it fascinating that despite Nola not remembering her past or anything about who she used to be, her sense of humour hadn't changed. She was still the same girl from all those years ago, she was still the same wrapped up gift just with a different name on the card.

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ANNIE'S LEGS SLIGHTLY ACHED as she sat upon the cold, hard wood laminate floor alongside a few select members from the community, all of which had gathered to face their pasts and celebrate how far they had all managed to come. Her knees had cracked when she had initially moved to the floor, the tendon in the joint snapped obnoxiously loud in the small room though thankfully no one had seemed aware that it had been her. Now her feet were wedged beneath her body, smothered under her weight as she sat crossed legs.

Her grimace from the pain morphed into a smile once a short shudder of breath from the man standing up next to Charlotte became a more calmed and collected exhale. Celebratory clicks of the fingers filled the room from the onlookers as the man grinned proudly at his achievement.

"Powerful work. Thank you." Charlotte soothingly stated, her voice flowing past her lips like a hot knife through butter. She gazed around the room curiously, staring down at all the faces. "Alright, who's next? Anyone?"

When no one offered up their participation, though not that she really cared in that moment, the Matthews woman shifted her deep brown eyes towards the back of the group. "Natalie?"

The now heliotrope coloured cardigan clad Natalie looked up at Charlotte, briefly looking like a deer in headlights. "What?" She rudely asked with a furrowed brow. As Charlotte gestured to the group's activity's, Natalie quickly shook her head. "No, no thanks. I'm not going up."

Charlotte sighed. "It's important that we all make an effort to be present for these exercises." Her hands were now held out, fingertips pointing directly at the black haired woman, her palms open and exposed. With a gentle smile, Charlotte uttered, "Come on, this is a judgement free zone. Come on."

          Natalie looked like she wanted to protest, looked as though this was the very last place she wanted to be, but when the reality that Charlotte wouldn't back off settled thickly upon the Scatorccio woman, almost choking her with the intensity of Charlotte's stare, Natalie grumbled to herself as she rose to her feet.

            A smile of success formed upon the plum tinted lips of Charlotte Matthews as she welcomed Natalie to the centre of the circle. "Wonderful. Alright, I want you to close your eyes and turn your attention inward. Is there anything in there that you would like to process with the group?" She inquired earnestly of her childhood friend.

           Immediately Natalie looked thoroughly rattled. "Fuck no, I am sorry, I'm not gonna--I can't."

           Charlotte held out her hands towards Natalie. "It's alright, it's alright, please. Stay here." Her voice was soothing as it left her lips. While keeping her eyes locked onto Natalie's, the woman commanded. "Lisa, join us. Come."

           Everyone turned to glance inquisitively at Lisa as she stumbled to her feet. She hadn't been expecting to be called upon by Charlotte and was therefore taken by surprise. She walked slowly until she next to two women.

          Charlotte shot the young girl a comforting smile. "Lisa, Natalie hurt you the other day, didn't she? Tell her how that made you feel."

          "Seems gratuitous--"

          Right away, before she could finish belittling the experience, the black haired woman was cut off by Charlotte who sharply spoke. "Natalie, please."

           Natalie fell silent with a sigh. After a short pause in which Lisa collected her thoughts, she allowed her voice to crept out weakly past her lips. "I felt fear...and disappointment. I thought she knew I was trying to help her."

           Slowly Natalie rolled her eyes. "I don't need anybody's help."

          "We saved your life!" Lisa snapped at the woman. Regret marred itself upon the features of her face at an instant. "Sorry, sorry, I'm sorry."

          A hand was placed delicately upon Lisa's shoulders, the tips of the fingers pressing in with a consoling pressure. "It's alright. You've told the group before that you let people walk all over you instead of expressing your anger, instead of feeling it but you're feeling it now, aren't you? Go into that anger, explore it."

            "Honour it."

            And as if to prove her point, prove her belief in Lisa, Charlotte sauntered away from the pair and in the direction of a silver tray set off to the side. She gripped firmly to something out of everyone's view before returning to Lisa and Natalie's side. "And if you feel the need, to hurt Natalie back, I want you to do it."

          While Charlotte spoke, her voice filling the room, she grabbed a hold of Lisa's hand, tugged open the tightened up fingers until they were splayed open and pressed a fork into her awaiting palm.

           Lisa shakily held the fork in her hand, the metal cold against the hot and sweaty skin of her palm. For a briefest of moments, it looked as though she truly wished to stab Natalie, to pay her back for the pain she had inflicted upon Lisa, make her feel as horrible as she had felt. That idea was squashed swiftly when the fork clattered obnoxiously to the floor.

           The young woman wrapped her arms tightly around a shocked Natalie, embracing the woman as tears tricked down her cheeks. "I understand and I forgive you." Lisa waveringly uttered.

          Another round of clicks of celebration broke the silence as Lisa pulled herself away from the black haired woman and walked off, heading in the direction of a proud smile wearing Annie March, who welcomed her to her side. "You did so well, I'm so proud of you."

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jamielee's thoughts.
chapter thirty. not proofread.
another adult nola chapter lol, not much is truly happening yet since she obviously doesn't remember anything. that's why they are so short but I promise they will get longer once everyone else shows up. anyway i hoped you enjoyed :)