ATHENA HAD been over at the Dunphy's just hanging out since Haley wasn't available. She was helping Claire out in the kitchen when Gloria and Manny showed up.

"Manny brought his favorite game to play with Luke," Gloria told Claire as Manny took the box out of his bag.

"It's called Empire," Manny started to explain. "You use strategy to expand territories and take over the world."

"Luke is gonna love that," Claire told him. "He's out back playing."

"Do you need me to get you something while I'm out shopping?" Gloria asked.

"Can you get me a new best friend?" Athena asked. "One without can annoying boyfriend preferably." She had definitely been annoyed of being ditched by Haley for Dylan.

𝐀𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐧𝐚

"Okay, so I'm a little upset that Dylan is stealing my best friend but I have every right to be jealous. I mean, she's spending all of her time with some stupid boy! What? Why are you looking at me like that?"

☺︎

"That's such a nice offer, but I think we're good. Thanks," Claire told Gloria.

"Okay. What about this?" Alex asked, showing her outfit to Claire and Athena.

"You don't even say 'Hello' to Gloria and Manny?"

"Hi, Gloria and Manny. Okay, Mom, what about this?"

"No. You're wearing a dress," Claire told her youngest daughter.

"Mom, come on."

"What? It's gonna kill you to look like a girl for one afternoon?"

"But it's a wedding for some friend of yours I never even heard of."

"It's non-negotiable. You can borrow a dress of Haley's again."

"No," Alex said. "That's sends an ugly message — that I'm Haley. You know, instead of trying to force me to wear a dress, why don't you worry about getting Luke to wear some pants?"

"What?" Athena laughed, looking out the window to see Luke jumping on the trampoline in his underwear and a box on his head.

"Why does he do this?" Claire asked, waking over to the door. "Luke! Pants! Come on!"

☺︎

"Alex, why don't you come shopping with me?" Gloria offered. "Athena, too! Maybe we can help you find something that you like and Thea doesn't have to just sit around without Haley."

"That's a really nice offer, but it's not really her thing," Claire said.

"Actually, I'd love to go," Alex said. "See, you don't know what my thing is. You have no idea what my thing is."

"I know what your thing is. Your thing is to provoke, just like your sister's thing is to never come out of her room, and your brothers thing — well, theres your brothers thing. Luke! Put em on!"

☺︎

"I was thinking after lunch we can go and do a little shopping," Gloria said as her, Alex and Athena walked over to their table.

"I'm not getting a dress," Alex said.

"Who cares?" Athena said. "You don't need to wear a dress. I've worn too many of Haley's and it sucks."

"Exactly. And I'm not your mother," Gloria added.

"I know. You're my grandmother," Alex said.

"Step-grandmother. Anyways, today, think of me as a girlfriend. Three girls out for an afternoon of fun."

"What do you usually do with your girlfriends?" Alex asked.

"I don't know. We go out. We talk, drink wine."

"Can I drink wine?"

"No."

"Can I?" Athena asked.

"Still no."

"Damn, some friend," Athena jokingly shook her head.

"Well, you can still talk to me about anything. Both of you," Gloria told them.

"Yeah, adults always say that, but they don't mean it," Alex said.

"The little person is correct," Athena said causing Alex to glare at her.

"When my mom says I can ask her anything, I really can't. She just freaks out," Alex continued.

"I won't freak out. Shoot."

"Okay. How many men have you slept with?"

"Eight," Gloria proudly answered. "Next."

☺︎

"I have a small flower on my ankle and a tiny little butterfly on my . . . thigh," Gloria told the girls.

"How high up?" Athena asked.

"Pretty high."

"Did you do it to look sexy?" Alex asked. "No — Did you do it for a guy? Does Grandpa like it?"

"I don't think you want an answer to that last question, Alex," Athena told her.

"No, no and yes," Gloria said.

"That's gross."

"Let's go back to your piercings," Alex said.

"No, no, no. I've answered enough of your questions. Now it's your turn to answer one."

"What is it?"

"Why you don't wanna wear a dress?"

"Because I don't want to look like Haley and her stupid friends — No offense, Athena," Alex said.

"None taken."

"I wear dresses and I don't look like Haley," Gloria said.

"You are Haley, just 40 years older."

"Ten."

"Twenty."

"Well, damn if Haley looks like that in twenty years . . ." Athena trailed off. Gloria gave her a seemingly knowing look.

"Alex, why are you fighting me on this?"

"It doesn't matter if I dress up. I'm not pretty like Haley, Athena or you," Alex admitted.

"That's ridiculous, Alex! You're beautiful," Athena told her.

"I'm not. But that's okay. I'm the smart one."

"Mmm. The cute busboy doesn't know you're smart," Gloria told her.

"What?"

"He's been smiling at you every time he comes to the table."

"He does not!"

"Why do you think we are the only people with bread? Look. One day you're going to want to date a cute guy like that. And when that day comes, you're going to want to look beautiful, and then you'll wear a dress."

"So, you ever kiss another girl?" Alex asked Gloria.

"That's no way to talk to your grandmother."

☺︎

"What about you, Thea? Why are you so jealous of Dylan?" Gloria finally asked the girl who was resting her head on her elbow as she stretched out her curls.

"Well, Haley and I have always done everything together," Athena admitted. "She has been there for me when no one else has. She helped me out when I was figuring something out about myself and now some dumb boy has come around and suddenly it's all about Dylan. He's always around and when he's not Haley's always talking about him! I guess I'm just jealous that he gets Haley all to himself."

"Have you tried talking to her?" Alex asked like it was the most obvious thing in the world. I mean, it was.

"Every time I get close to talking to her about it, another sentence about Dylan comes out of her mouth. And I don't wanna ruin her mood. She always looks so happy and I don't wanna ruin it by accidentally starting a fight about her boyfriend.

𝐀𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐧𝐚
"Why would you ask that?" She asked. "I'm not jealous of Dylan because he's dating Haley. That's ridiculous." Athena laughed uneasily.

Since Modern Family is kind of filmed mockumentary style i decided to kinda break a fourth wall with Athena asking questions back to a supposed camera crew kind of like in the office.

anyways yes some episodes will be skipped cause let's be honest how many episodes do you think i can write based around haley and athena? a lot but not all.