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Aleta sat next to Myles as he slept in the medical wing of the dropship. She was supposed to be asleep as well, but all of the commotion outside made it impossible. She checked him over and made sure that he was breathing normally before standing up and walking to the other cot. Aleta released a sigh as she settled into the makeshift bed.

Laying on her back, she stared up at the ceiling of the dropship. She didn't bother trying to fall asleep again, knowing that it was useless. Her friends had continuously came to check on her whilst she healed. None of them would let her leave, all claiming that she needed to rest and get her strength back. She hated when they told her that. In their current situation, there was no way that she could properly rest.

A gun shot rang out and Aleta immediately lurched to a sitting position. She instantly regretted it when a stabbing pain became present in her head. She briefly closed her eyes and massaged her head before pulling herself off of the bed and walking to the dropship's entrance. She slowly walked down the ramp and scanned the area, seeing the campers beginning to crowd around.

Bellamy was yelling at one of the deliquents and Aleta assumed that he was the one to fire a shot. "The grounders are out there right now, waiting for us to leave and picking us off one by one when we do! Clarke, Finn, and Monty are gone, probably dead, and if you want to be next, I can't stop you, but no guns are leaving this camp! This camp is the only thing keeping us alive! Get back to work!" Was all Aleta heard Bellamy say.

She disagreed with some of what he said. Those grounders would not have gone through the trouble of taking Clarke and Finn if they were just going to kill them. They most likely needed them for something. And Monty, well she didn't know what happened to him. But she didn't think he was dead either. But only because she didn't want to believe it. "Hey, what are you doing out of bed?" Raven asked as she stopped in front of her friend.

"I heard a gunshot. Wanted to make sure everything was okay," Aleta answered. "Yeah everything's fine. Some kid just got tired and accidentally fired his gun," Raven replied. Aleta nodded once before scanning the camp again. "When are we gonna go out to look for Clarke, Monty, and Finn?" She asked Raven who scoffed. "You aren't going anywhere besides back to bed," she answered.

Aleta rolled her eyes, "I'm gonna help look for them. You can't make me stay here." Raven nodded, "Maybe I can't but Bellamy can." It was Aleta's turn to scoff. "Bellamy doesn't have control over me," she said. "I mean, he's not letting anyone leave camp. He doesn't think any of them are alive, so to him, there's no point," Raven explained. "Well, I'm not gonna let that stop me either," Aleta retorted in determination.

"So, you think they're alive?" Raven inquired. "Yeah. For now at least. We need to find them before it's too late," Aleta answered. "Well, we just need to figure out a way to sneak out of camp. But until then, go try to get some sleep," Raven responded. Aleta rolled her eyes again, "Fine." She made her way back to the dropship. When Aleta entered, she saw Jasper angrily climb the stairs and go to the upper level. Bellamy was staring after him.

"You do something to piss him off?" She asked him, moving around him to get to her temporary cot. "I always do something to piss someone off," came Bellamy's reply. "At least you can admit it," Aleta replied, taking a seat on the bed. Across from her, Myles was grunting softly. "I knew you'd say something like that," he muttered. "I'm that predictable, huh?" Aleta said. "No, I just know you," he answered and Aleta rolled her eyes at his words.

"Are you ever going to forgive me?" Bellamy blurted out. She slowly turned to look at him, "For what?" This caused him to sigh, "You know what." She looked away again. She did know what. "What I said to you, it was wrong and I regret it everyday. I'm sorry," he apologized. Aleta shrugged, " Apology accepted." He instantly shook his head, "You can't just say that and not mean it."

"I just did," Aleta replied. "Jesus, Aleta! Are you serious?" He asked incredulously. She rubbed down her face but said nothing else. "You shouldn't even be up. Maybe you should get some sleep," Bellamy said in defeat. "So, you still think that you're the boss of me, shocker," Aleta stated. "It was just a suggestion," he retorted. "What are you even doing in here, Bellamy? Why did you come?" She asked.

"I just came to check on you," he answered. She stood up and faced him. "Why?" She asked again. "Because I care about you, okay?" He responded and she scoffed. "You care about me? Really?" She questioned. "Yes, really," he said. "Well do us both a favor and stop caring. We're not together anymore. You don't have to deal with me," Aleta said before beginning to walk back over to the bed.

Bellamy gently grabbed her wrist and turned her back to him. "I can't just stop caring," he protested. "It's easy. See?" And with that, she took her wrist out of his grasp and walked back to the bed. Bellamy took ahold of her forearm and turned her around again. "Look Bellamy, I'm not your issue anymore," she stated. Bellamy was shocked, "My issue?" Aleta was quick to nod, ignoring the pain in her head when she did. "Yes, your issue. You no longer have to put up with me so just leave me alone."

"I can't do that," he protested again. "Yes you can," Aleta almost shouted. "Well, I don't want to do that," he retorted. "Why not?" This time, she did shout. "Because I love you, dammit!" He yelled in frustration. His words shut her up immediately. She stared at him with wide eyes, taken aback by the abruptness of his words. Bellamy released a sigh and ran a hand through his curls.

"I lied, okay? I lied when I said that I wasn't in love with you anymore. I am, all right? I do love you. The only reason I told you that I didn't was so that you could move on from me when I left. I couldn't tell you the truth about the dropship and Octavia so I wanted you to hate me so that it would be easier for me to leave you. And so that when I did leave, it wouldn't feel as though I just up and abandoned you. It made sense to me at the time but after I got down here, I realized it was stupid. I should've told you the truth, asked you to come with me. But a part of me knew that you wouldn't and I didn't want you to know where I was after what I had planned to do to the chancellor." Bellamy took a breath and let out an incredulous laugh.

"God, I love you. And it hurts because I can't be with you and I want to be. It hurts because I hurt you and believe me, that is the last thing that I ever wanted to do. And it hurts to love you, knowing that we can't be together anymore, because of what I did. What I said," Bellamy took a deep breath before continuing.

"But I deserve whatever pain that I'm feeling. What I don't deserve is you. I never have. You were always too good for me. Your dad was right about that. You could have done so much better. But you didn't. You chose me and I was the luckiest guy ever. And I screwed everything up, just like I always do," he continues. Aleta squeezed her eyes shut. "But I never stopped loving you. I never could. And I don't want to," Bellamy concluded.

Aleta opened her eyes and looked at him. His own eyes were welling up with tears that she knew he was trying to keep from falling. She suddenly felt angry. "Why are you doing this?" She asked him. "Doing what?" He asked back. "This! Telling me all of this like it's going to change something. It doesn't," she replied. "But it does. You don't see it because you don't want to. It changes things and that scares you," Bellamy retorted. "You don't know what you're talking about," Aleta denied.

"Yes I do, because I know you. Better than anyone," he responds. Aleta was quick to reply, "Sometimes I wish you didn't. Sometimes I wish that I never met you. That I never fell in love with you."

Bellamy instantly felt a pang in his chest after the words fell from her lips. He didn't try to mask the hurt that spread across his face. The hurt that began to cloud his eyes. Aleta looked away from him then, guilt filling her body until it was practically choking her. She never wanted to hurt him. But she meant her words although she wished that she didn't. He made her feel like this. "I'm sorry that you feel that way," he whispered.

"You know, you're not the only one who's hurting, Bellamy. I'm hurt too because of you. You hurt me. You make me feel the things that I do and that's why I wish that I had never met you. So that it doesn't hurt so damn much," she said. At this point, Aleta was trying to keep her own tears at bay. The room was quiet for a long moment before she spoke again.

"But, every time I think like this, I remember that if I never met you, I probably wouldn't have fallen in love. I would stayed cooped up in my place or in the med bay and just focused on school and my career. I never would've experienced what I did. Felt what I feel. All the good things. All the bad. All the pain. But it was good, what we had. It was good. And, I want that back but I know that we'll never have it. We will never be the same," she said. Bellamy nodded in understanding.

"We used to be so good together, what happened?" He asked quietly. Another brief silence fell over them as Aleta searched for the right words, but there were none. "You left me," she finally said. Silence again. "I'm sorry," Bellamy tried. "Unfortunately, 'sorry', doesn't fix anything. It changes nothing," she responded. "I know," he said quietly. "But I wish it did." Aleta nodded, "Me too."

By now, her head was throbbing and all she wanted to do was lie down. But she couldn't do that yet. She still had things to get off of her chest. "I love you too, Bellamy. But, it's not enough," she said. He shook his head in disagreement, "I don't believe that. You used to tell me that love conquers all. That it was what made things better. That it made us stronger. You made me believe that. That's one of the reasons why I love you. Because you believe in things that other people don't and can give them a reason to believe in those things too."

"I guess I was wrong," Aleta replied. "No, you were right," Bellamy retorted. Another silence. It was beginning to drive the two insane. "I wish I could take it back. That I was honest with you that day. Maybe things wouldn't be the way they are now," he said. "Yeah, maybe," she mumbled. "Do you think you could ever forgive me? That you could ever give me another chance?" He asked so desperately and so full of hope.

His brown eyes practically begged her to say 'yes' as they stared into her blue ones. She held his gaze and sighed. "I think I can forgive you," she finally responded. A small smile broke out onto his face and a relieved sigh quietly escaped his lips. "But not anytime soon. And giving you another chance? I don't know. I don't know if we should even be together again. I need time to think, I guess," she added. His smile dimmed slightly but he nodded in understanding. "Take all the time that you need. I'll be here, waiting," he said. She shook her head at that. "I don't want you to do that. I think you should move on from me, Bellamy. There are plenty of girls here that I know would love to be with you," she said.

"I don't want them. I want you," he replied. An involuntary laugh bubbled up and out of her mouth. "I knew you'd say that," she muttered before looking up at him. "You can't always get what you want. I think it's time for you to move on, so that I can move on too because I can't do this anymore, Bell," she said. He opened his mouth but was cut off by Myles. "Water please," the boy croaked. Their eyes moved over to his form.

"I'll get you some," Bellamy said. He turned back to Aleta and cleared his throat. "You should get some rest." And with that, he exited the dropship. Aleta watched him leave before looking down. A sob escaped her lips and the tears that she was holding in began to fall. She walked the rest of the way to the cot and sat down. She then curled herself into a ball and cried some more. Frustration bubbled up within her and she angrily wiped the tears away.

She sighed again and closed her eyes, eventually getting herself to fall asleep.

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The angst is real in this chapter. Hey guys! It's been a minute since I've updated. Sorry about that, I just wasn't really in the mood to write this book. Anyway, I don't know how I feel about this chapter. I don't think I like it all that much. But, I hope you guys enjoyed it. I'm almost at the end of season one so part one of this book will have a few more chapters and then there'll be part two, which is season two. Alright, that's enough for me now. Have a nice day.