- Rick's POV -

"We're running low on supplies. While the fresh crops and meat are good, it's just not enough. We need preservatives. Canned food that will last." Herschel explains clearly, sitting back in his seat, his eyes skimming around the council for responses.

"We've already done runs to all the stores near us. If we were to risk trying to find anywhere else, it would take at least a week." Maggie sighs, tapping her fingers on the table absentmindedly. My eyebrows twitch together with thought.

"What if we made our own?" I suggest, tilting my head to the side.

Herschel turns to me. "We don't have enough crop or time for that. We need to wait until winter. We still need the fresh food you're producing." Herschel points out. I sigh, rubbing my temples.

I genuinely don't know what we could do. We aren't sure that other places will have the stuff we need, and if they don't, we would waste days of travel and gas getting there and back all for nothing. It's a big risk.

"I have an idea," Cass speaks up abruptly from across the table, making all of us turn and look at her. "Okay, hear me out. There is a place, only a few day's travel from here, that we know will have supplies we could use." She suggests, her green eyes scanning our faces. As the rest of us stare back silently, she sighs.

"The Greene Farm." Cass explains delicately, eyeing the Greenes at the table with wariness. I blink. I hadn't thought of that.

"The what?" Sasha questions, eyebrows raised, her head snapping back and forth between us. Herschel sighs deeply, looking down.

"It was our family farm. We lived there for a while before it got overrun by walkers," Maggie explains to Sasha, who nods, her gaze turning soft.

"My tent was stocked full of medical supplies that I could definitely use here. Didn't you have a whole basement full of preservatives?" Cass questions Herschel intelligently, turning to him. Herschel just nods, not looking at her, heartache behind his eyes.

I glance over at Cass, who bites her lip, looking down.

"She has a point. There's a slim chance that other people ransacked it after the herd did. And we could really use those supplies." I argue, trying to be as delicate as I can. I know losing his family farm was horrible for Herschel. And it's clearly still an open wound for him.

"I'll go." Maggie says, nodding with determination. I immediately shake my head.

"That's not happening. You're too close to it. And your wedding is in a week, if something were to go wrong- you could miss it." I point out to her, making her sigh, looking down.

"Okay. Glenn wouldn't want me going either," Maggie agrees, a tinge of annoyance yet fondness in her voice.

"I'll take Daryl. We know the place without being too attached." I decide, knowing Daryl will say yes. I don't need to ask him to know that.

"I can go too. I'll know which medical supplies to grab," Cass offers, her hopeful eyes meeting mine.

"No. It's not worth the risk. The fewer people going, the better. Daryl and I know how to get in and out quick. And you can give me a list. I promise I will get it all for you." I assure Cass, who nods, averting her gaze.

I glance back at the council. "Does that work with the rest of you?" I question them.

Cass, Maggie, Sasha, and Carol nod. I meet Hershcel's gaze, who hasn't moved. He's reluctant.

I don't blame him.

"Herschel, we'll be careful. You know that." I remind him, wanting to convince him but trying to be understanding. I can't imagine the thoughts that must be going through his head. Seeing my old home all those months ago with Cass, Carl, and Michonne was hard enough, and it wasn't traumatically run through by walkers.

"Grab me one of the framed pictures of me and my girls and you got a deal." Herschel instructs, making me smile with a nod.

"Deal."

—

"Be safe." Carol orders with raised eyebrows and her stern mother voice. I nod with an amused smile.

"We will. I'll make sure we both come back unscathed," I assure her, making her nod with a warm smile.

"Bye! Stay smart," Cass demands, hugging Daryl. He hugs her back tightly.

"Yeah, I always do, don't worry." Daryl grunts, smiling slightly despite himself.

As the hug ends, Cass's gaze finds mine. "You guys have the list, right?" She checks, her green eyes darting between us. Daryl nods, holding up a crumpled sheet of paper, Cass's writing scrawled out across it.

She grins brightly at the sight. "Great!" She enthuses.

Daryl turns to get the truck started, leaving me and Cass alone.

"You guys will be okay without us?" I ask teasingly, knowing that I really don't even have to ask. Cass rolls her eyes with a smile before embracing me, tossing her arms around my neck. I hug her back, my arms wrapping around her waist, appreciating the feeling of hugging my good friend. She means so much to me.

"Please don't do something stupid. And don't you dare rip that wound open. I worked hard on those stitches." Cass demands into my shoulder, making me let out a chuckle. She leans back with a grin, placing a quick and casual peck on my cheek as she leans away from our embrace.

oh.

My brain malfunctions for a moment.

Did she just-

Cass pulls away quickly, her hands flying away from me, a strange expression crossing on her face. I blink at her in surprise, her eyes just as wide as mine they stare back at me. Seeming just as shocked as I feel.

"Grimes! Come on!" Daryl calls roughly from inside the truck.

"Right, I should go. Bye," I breathe to Cass, not entirely sure why my heart is suddenly pounding. I jump into the passenger side, slamming the door behind me. At the chorus of goodbyes, Daryl begins to pull away.

I glance back in the mirror to see Cass holding her hand to her mouth as she watches us drive off. The spot on my cheek she kissed is suddenly burning and I look forward, bewilderment overwhelming me.

- Cass POV -

Holy shit. Holy shit. Holy shit.

I did not just do that.

Fuck.

Wordlessly, I stalk away from the send-off, my stomach in knots. I genuinely don't know what the fuck just happened. It's like I was possessed- my deepest desires forcing themselves to the surface and taking control of my body.

After a walk to try to calm myself down, I finally come across Maggie in her cell, folding her clean laundry. I stand in the doorway of her cell, breathing heavily, my mind still racing.

Maggie pauses what she's doing, looking at me with confusion. "Are you-"

"-I fucked up, Maggie. Bad." I breathe hoarsely, my eyes wide. My heart is hammering in my chest, sending shockwaves of regret and fear through my body. I'm terrified of what I did. What this could mean for my friendship with Rick.

"What do you mean?" Maggie questions, her voice low and clearly concerned, her eyebrows drawn together. Closing her curtain, I rush into the room, dropping clumsily on the bed. With my elbows on my knees, I drop my face into my hands with a groan.

"I kissed him" I mumble, barely audible through my hands.

"You... what?" She questions me genuinely, obviously not hearing me. I groan, flopping back onto the bed and staring up at the dark gray ceiling in defeat.

"I kissed him," I repeat slowly and clearly, cringing as I remember it again in vivid detail. The expression of shock on his face makes my stomach drop once again. He was probably disgusted.

"Who?" Maggie questions with interest, dropping down on the bed beside me, clutching one of her shirts to her chest. I whine in frustration, throwing my forearm over my eyes, not being able to look at her.

"Rick." I reveal. Just saying it, out loud, makes it all far too real.

Shit.

"Oh..." Maggie responds, her voice quiet. There's a beat of silence. "I'm guessing by your reaction, it didn't go well?" She asks delicately.

I sit up abruptly, turning to look at her. "No. It did not go well. I feel like I molested him," I mumble with defeat, feeling extremely sorry for myself, making a smile quirk across her face.

"Hey! No laughing!" I demand, on the brink of tears at this point, feeling worse than I did before.

"I'm sorry!" Maggie cries, grabbing my hands in hers. "Tell me what happened." She tells me softly, her expression kind. I sigh heavily, looking down and fidgeting with my hands.

"I didn't even mean to! it just- happened. I was hugging him and Daryl goodbye and when I pulled away from the hug with Rick, I don't know what came over me, it was just instinct. I pecked him on the cheek as I left the hug, and oh my god- Maggie, you should have seen the look on his face." I breathe with misery, groaning and rubbing my hands over my face.

Maggie pats my back comfortingly. "I'm sure it wasn't as big of a deal as you feel it is right now," She says reassuringly. I shake my head.

"No. Something changed. He looked like I just violated him or something and I feel terrible." I say desperately, staring back at maggie before I look down, rubbing my forehead. "I just want to crawl into a hole and die." I lament pitifully.

Maggie clicks her tongue. "Don't say that. It was one little peck. It's not going to ruin your friendship. People kiss their friends on the cheek all the time and it doesn't mean anything." Maggie reassures me.

I fight the tears behind my eyes as I stare at the cracked concrete floor, not having the courage to look at her.

"I need to get over him, Maggie. I can't keep living like this," I tell her quietly, my voice just above a whisper. My heart feels like shards of glass in my chest, sending echoes of pain through my body with every heartbeat.

I can't keep pining after him like this because one day I will slip up, like I did today, but worse. Confess everything and completely ruin our friendship. And I couldn't live with myself if I did that. I care too deeply for him, even as my friend, to face that.

"Then get over him!" Maggie offers, her tone bright. I turn to look at her with a doubtful look.

"It's not that easy," I sniffle. I know full well, I've tried.

God, I've tried, but I just- can't. Like there's some invisible force forever pulling me towards him. Ordering me to be completely devoted to him. And just him.

"It is easy if there's someone else. There are plenty of guys here! Even if you don't like them as much as you do Rick, they will distract you. You will eventually forget about how you feel for him." Maggie tells me.

Blinking, I take in her words. She could have a point. It's just difficult to try to trust a man again. Especially after Phillip.

But maybe I need to push past that.

I can't keep living like this. Longing after a man who clearly does not feel the same. It's getting depressing at this point.

Sitting up straighter, I brush away the stray tear that fought past my eyelids. I nod, putting on a brave smile. "Okay. I'll do it." I say with a determined nod. Maggie grins.

"Great! You'll forget about Rick in no time."

- Ricks POV -
 two days later 

"What's up with you?" Daryl questions me, popping a bit of the squirrel he caught thirty minutes ago into his mouth. I glance up from where I was staring into the crackling fire in front of us, my mind racing.

"I uh- don't know," I respond honestly, still feeling uneasy. I have been for two days now. Daryl stares at me knowingly over his water bottle as he takes a swig.

"I do," he responds shortly. I look up at him questioningly through my furrowed brows, making him shake his head with amusement.

"You have feelings for Cass," Daryl grunts simply, his words making my stomach lurch. I blink at him in shock.

"What?" I demand tersely, squinting at him with confusion.

He shakes his head. "How d'you, of all people, not know? You stare at her all the time, talk about her like you're talking about the damn sun, and she pecked you on the cheek and you acted like she stuck her tongue down your goddamn throat." Daryl grunts, turning to me expectantly.

His words send a shockwave through my body, abruptly making me realize I very much like the idea of Cass sticking her tongue down my throat.

Woah. What?

My mouth opens and closes as I try to come up with some sort of justification but I realize I don't have one. I run a stressed hand down my face. Shit.

Do I really care about her, like that? I never saw myself having feelings for anyone else after Lori but this is...different. The last time I was actively dating I was 17 and then met Lori. I don't exactly have a lot of experience in this area. I thought Cass was just my genuinely great friend and that's why I wanted to be around her all the time. Why she is the first person I look for when I enter a room. Or why I feel protective over her. Because she's part of the group. My family.

But feeling her lips on my skin, even for the millisecond like they did the other day, has made me realize much more. I never ventured past the boundary between friends and being more than that- but having that boundary become abruptly transparent has resulted in chaos within my mind.

Daryl chuckles beside me and I send him a death glare.

"This isn't funny," I grumble dryly, pulling squirrel meat off the bones and into my mouth, my heart pounding at my sobering realization.

"Stop being dramatic and ask her out. She'll say yes," Daryl tells me, amusement written across his face.

I shake my head, my stomach flipping at the idea. "Daryl, I don't even know if she feels that way about me too. I just found out how I feel about her," I sigh, running a hand through my hair, looking out at the dark woods surrounding us like I will find an answer out there.

"Rick, trust me. She'll say yes," Daryl insists, an unfamiliar expression on his face.

I blink, thinking back about these past months. We've been spending a lot of time together. One of my favorite parts of my day is having lunch with her and Carl, laughing the whole time.

I realize why I was so nervous when she was stitching up my cut the other day. She was so close. Smiling up at me while she fixed my wound effortlessly. The way it made me feel when she teased me after, that mischievous glint in her eyes. I look down at my gauzed hand, feeling a million emotions flash through me.

It makes sense now that the way I talk to her is entirely different than how I talk to Carol, Maggie, or any other women I care about. There's just- something more when it comes to Cass. I want to tease her to watch her get flustered because- Oh God, because it's so damn endearing. And I find myself touching her when it is definitely not required or normal to do so.

I suddenly can't comprehend not seeing it before.

How blind have I been?

"Y-You really think she would want to be with me?" I ask quietly, clearing my throat and definitely not looking at Daryl, staring back at the rippling flames in front of me. My nerves buzz under my skin at the idea of her having feelings for me too.

"I'm tellin' you, man." Daryl replies gruffly as he sharpens his stick to a point with his hunting knife.

I take a deep breath, before nodding with determination. "Yeah, okay. I'll ask her when we get back." I breathe with a nod, glancing over to see a smile on Daryl's face.

"Good" he grumbles.

The run to the farm is surprisingly successful. There were a few straggler walkers left over, but the herd had undoubtedly moved through and out. It took us a day just to get through all the stuff, rummaging through our beaten-down old tents and collecting the massive amount of canned goods Herschel left in the basement.

Before we leave the next morning, I make sure to grab a framed photo on the mantle of Herschel, his late wife we never got to meet, and his two daughters, stuffing it carefully in my backpack.

After seven days of being gone, we finally make it back to the prison. My body fills with happiness as it finally comes into view. The late-afternoon sun ignites the dull concrete buildings with a warm glow, making it more of a comforting sight.

Knowing I'm going to be able to see everyone after a week fills me with excitement. My friends, my kids, and... Cass.

The car pulls up to the group waiting by Cell Block C. I get out, eager to greet them all. I hug Carl first, who questions me immediately to see if I got anything for him. I pass him one of his old comic books that was luckily still in our old tent.

I then give Herschel his promised photo, making him smile warmly. "Thank you, Rick." He says, and I nod with a smile, glad to have fulfilled his request. 

I turn, expecting to see Cass, but to my disappointment, I don't. Carol comes up to hug me. "I'm glad you two got back safe! It's a good thing we got all this food, a new group of people arrived only a day after you guys left." Carol tells me, and I nod, not entirely listening, distracted by the absence of a particular doctor.

Daryl pops open the trunk, revealing the large number of supplies stacked haphazardly in the back. Herschel calls out for some help bringing this all in, and a couple of helpful people jog over from the pavilion. I grab the box full of Cass's old medical supplies quickly, making sure no one else gets to it before me.

"Have you seen Cass?" I ask Carol, turning to her, my heart already speeding up in my chest at the thought of seeing her again.

"Oh yeah, I think she's in the infirmary," Carol smiles helpfully, turning to grab some of the food out of the car. I nod once, immediately making my way to Cass, readjusting my grip on the surprisingly heavy box. I meticulously collected the supplies she requested, making sure to grab everything detailed on her list.

My heart is pounding against my ribcage, adrenaline tingling through my arms and legs. The last time I saw her I didn't even know I had feelings for her but now I'm going to ask her out.

God, I hope she says yes. Daryl has some weird assumption that she will, so I'm hoping he's right.

Pushing open the squeaky door to E block, I navigate my way around the halls to the infirmary. My heart skips a beat when I enter the dark cell hall and I spot her through the window of her office.

Cass is looking down, busy writing something down. Her copper hair is tied up with a couple of free strands hanging around her ridiculously attractive, I realize, face. The lamp beside her basks her in a warm glow, igniting her features. She furrows her brows slightly, biting the inside of her cheek thoughtfully before writing down something else.

Suddenly feeling like I can't stand waiting for a second more, I don't waste time walking over. Once at the entrance of her office, I lean against the door frame, staring at her back as she sits facing away from me. She doesn't notice me, too consumed with her work. I drop down the box. "Long time no see," I speak up loudly, making Cass jump, placing a hand on her chest.

She spins around in the chair with a wide smile. "Rick!" She enthuses, getting up to wrap me in a hug. I grin, hugging her back eagerly.

I feel complete as I wrap my arms around her body and pull her close, praying she can't hear my heartbeat thundering in my chest at the touch. Her familiar smell invades my nose, making butterflies flutter in my stomach. How did I never notice how good she smells?

"Everything go okay?" Cass asks me with those wide and caring eyes of hers as she leans away from the hug. I push past the slight disappointment at her not kissing my cheek again, nodding at her question with a gulp.

"Yep, got it all here," I respond, turning and grabbing the box of everything she requested. Her face lights up, causing me to warm with happiness and pride, relishing the fact that I've made her this happy.

"Oh, this is great! I can't wait to get this all sorted and ready," She grins, and I smile too as I gaze down at her, adoration flooding through me at her nerdy excitement over medical supplies. I pass the box to her which she takes eagerly, placing it down on the desk she was just working at. I try not to notice how good she looks in her tight black t-shirt and jeans.

"I can help you sort it out," I offer, walking up behind her and leaning over her shoulder to pretend to look at the box of items, reveling in her irresistible scent flooding my senses once again. It's a pleasant combination of some sort of minty toothpaste and citrus soap, mixed in between the two is her subtle smell. The part that's just- Her.

My heart pounds excitedly at our proximity, which is new territory for me. Now that I know how I really feel about Cass, it's setting my nerves on fire just being this close to her.

I can sense her body tense up beside me before she glances over at her shoulder to meet my gaze.

Time pauses as those captivating green eyes stare back at me for a moment. We're so close I notice the sparse flecks of yellow by her pupils and the subtle freckles that scatter across the bridge of her nose. My eyes take her in with an unexplored enthusiasm, discovering her stunning features in a new light. One where I don't look at her and see my friend Cass, but Cass. A woman I want to memorize every inch of.

Then, to my disappointment, Cass steps back, clearing her throat and averting her gaze awkwardly.

"Don't worry about it, you should get some rest! I have a new helper anyway," Cass dismisses with a shake of her head, making me blink in confusion. A new helper?

"Hey, Spence?" She calls out into the storage room's adjoining doorway. I furrow my brows, standing up straight and turning.

A somewhat tall, lanky, blonde man around Cass's age appears in the doorway, his eyebrows raised. "Yeah, babe?" He asks looking at Cass, his words hitting me like a boulder through a windshield.

...Babe?

"Hey, we just got some new supplies, do you mind helping out by putting them away?" Cass asks, holding up the box of goods. He smiles at her with a nod, grabbing the supplies from her. The supplies I got for her.

"Yeah, of course," Spence replies, bending down and kissing her cheek before turning and going back into the storage room. Walking away casually like he didn't just shatter my world.

I watch his blonde head disappear, my heart dropping, suddenly grieving what never was. "Uh- who's that?" I ask casually, clearing my throat. My former excited mood abruptly turns into suffocating disappointment.

Cass smiles- smiles- before responding. "Oh right, Spencer came in while you and Daryl were gone. You know that I give the newcomers a tour of the Prison and everything, and well, Spencer and I got to talking and kind of hit it off so we're dating now I guess," Cass mumbles, going back to her paperwork, a fucking blush on her cheeks. I nod once, clenching my jaw.

You've got to be kidding me.

"That's great Cass, I'm- happy for you," I manage, trying not to make my extreme dissatisfaction apparent. I get the sudden desire to tell her how I feel anyway, stop her from being with that stranger and give her the option to choose me instead.

Cass looks over at me for a moment, something behind her eyes. Pain, I think, making my heart sink. "Thanks. It's been a while for me... and Spencer is sweet. He's definitely better than Phillip that's for sure," Cass laughs hollowly, averting her gaze. I nod, looking down and closing my eyes for a moment.

My heart aches for her. She's been through so much because of Phillip and their horrible relationship. She deserves to be happy now.

As much as I hate to admit it, I shouldn't tell her about how I feel. I shouldn't ruin the joy she has right now. It wouldn't be fair just so I can have the possibility of being with her. It's selfish.

It's okay if happy for her isn't with me. As much as I wish it was. God, I really wish it was.

I just nod, placing my hand on the doorframe and glancing behind me. "Well, I should go check on the farm and make sure everything is good," I say, realizing that taking out my anger on farming could be extremely beneficial. I may or may not picture that Spencer's face as I smash the tool into the soil.

"Thanks again Rick, it's great having you back. It wasn't the same without you around," Cass tells me, that sweet, kind smile on her face as she watches me. I want nothing more than to cross the room, take that perfect mouth in mine, and kiss her so hard, so passionately, that she forgets whoever this idiot Spencer is.

I blink. Jesus.

"That's good to hear. I'm happy to be back too. I'll see you later," I say casually with a nod, turning around. My heart screams in protest as I walk away, further from Cass and her new boyfriend.

After taking out my anger on fixing the crops that desperately need it, I get called away to go to Maggie and Glenn's wedding.

It's a small affair, with only the closest friends in attendance as they share their vows, Herschel officiating. I can't lie, it warmed my heart to watch my good friends finally tie the knot as they grinned at each other. They're so great together. It makes me so happy for them. They're so lucky they found each other.

They host an after-party in the courtyard for the whole community to attend.

Joining the party, I walk through the courtyard, lit up in the growing darkness by string lights made with candles and old jars. They line the edge of the pavilion and are strung back to cell block D, creating a web of glittering lights for everyone to socialize under. Dinner is being cooked on the grill, sending delicious smells through the yard.

The entire community is standing around, chatting and eating. There are a few new faces scattered around the familiar. I spot Sophia and Carl arguing over superheroes at the kid's table, making me smile with amusement.

My eyes find Judith in the arms of Beth, as usual, being cooed over by a group of women. Knowing she's in safe hands, I leave them be. I also dread the idea of all those women cooing over me as well once they learn I'm the single father.

I grab a beer from the refreshment table, preferring it to the questionable punch being served. Taking a swing from my beer bottle, I glance around, freezing when I see her.

Cass.

She stands with that Spencer guy, dressed in a dark dress that hugs her figure in just the right places, making my stomach swoop. Cass smiles as she brings her red solo cup to her mouth, taking a drink as she listens to Spencer talk.

I watch with furrowed brows as Cass throws her head back in laughter at something Spencer said, holding onto his arm for support. I furrow my brows, feeling my jaw tighten. He can't be that funny, can he?

"Hey man, I heard," Daryl grunts from beside me, and I clench my jaw.

"Yeah. So much for her saying yes," I comment bitterly, looking down for a moment, watching her with him becoming too much.

"There's a bright side," Daryl says, leaning against the support beam of the pavilion beside me. I look over at him in dry disbelief.

"How," I demand through clenched teeth.

"Well you're older than Spencer, with brown hair," Daryl states, and I squint over at him. He's joking, right?

"And how is that a bright side?" I snap, anger flashing through me. I glance back up at the pair, my chest aching with longing even more when I see how close they are standing together.

"Nah. You're more her type. Think about the Governor, he looks more like you, tall with brown hair, and a little older," Daryl says with a shrug. I look at him incredulously.

"I'm sure the last thing she wants is someone that reminds her of that psychopath," I argue, my eyebrows knitted together with irritation.

Fucking Phillip. Always ruining everything.

Daryl nods slightly. "Maybe that's why she went for the opposite guy this time," he says thoughtfully. I groan, my head falling back in defeat. I stare up at the stars in incredulity at my current situation.

Why me?

"Bad timing man. But it may not work out," Daryl says, clapping me on the back supportingly before walking away.

My eyes wander back to the happy couple. Spencer is talking about something and Cass is nodding along, her hair swaying slightly as she does. I suddenly can't comprehend how I didn't realize how much I felt for her before. How could I not when she is this devastatingly beautiful? Especially now, with the string lights above illuminating her features in the most inviting way.

I want nothing more than to be the man she laughs with like that. The one she touches intimately. The one she takes home with her.

Watching, my heart twinges with a deep longing as she laughs softly, pointing out a smudge of sauce on Spencer's face. Smiling, she wipes it off with her thumb, before sticking it in her mouth.

I suddenly feel nauseous.

It's too much to bear. To watch. I slam down my drink on the nearest table, stalking away. Bitterness boils in my veins, so furious that I care this much about her and only realized the second it's too late.

Just my fucking luck.