Happy New Years everyone! 

Yeah yeah, I know. No update for a while... but I've been pretty busy. With the end and the term and all, wrapping my grades up has- suprisingly- been pretty easy. The hard part about my life is my friends... gosh... things are changing so much. 

Let's start with the end of the semester. My friend is SUPER behind on her grades, and I've been trying to help her get them up. Being the person she is, she doesn't want to do any of it. And I can understand that... but sometimes... ugh... It hurts when your help is rejected. Just saying... 

Being the person I am, I have straight A's with maybe two -A's. There really isn't any work that I need to make up, so I offered to help my friend- whoms name is Krysal (who I probably have previously mentioned). She hates school, like every other teenager out there (BUT ME). She's kinda put off her homework until now... when everything piles up... 

This past Friday, I tried to talk some sense into her. I pestered her about going to the library and getting some of her assignments done, and that I would help her. She wouldn't do it. I finally snapped...

I admit, I probably sounded harsh, but I told her she would just go home and push it aside anyway! Better to get it done while you could right? 

Well, in response, she got up and stormed out of the lunch room. My friend- Melody- quickly ran after her, but I just stood there, completely hurt. No one wanted me. I had tried to talk to some of my other friends, who I'm not as close to, but... they push my away anyway... 

Over the weekend, I felt so guilty. I wasn't sorry for what I said, though. I just... I've really wanted to tell her how I have felt about all of this homework crap (sorry for the language) for such a long time- cuz she complains about it every day- but I didn't want her to feel hurt... 

Last Friday as well, I learned a lot of things about my friend Krysal from one of my other friends.

The thing is, we used to have a huge group of friends who got a long and who loved to be around eachother- boys and girls. The group split the year I was introduced into it... I didn't know if it was me who had caused the split when it happened, but...still... 

Now, I realize what had really happened. The friend who had told me, Josie, had hurt Krystal's feelings somehow, but I she had never told me what Josie had said. I had asked Josie what had happened in PE and she told me the whole story...

I won't tell it here online- for the sake of my friends secrecy- but let's just say it cleared up a whole lot of problems in my head. I understood why Krystal had said the things she did. I realized why the group hated Krystal, Melody and I so much. 

In my mind... I had chose the losing side. The odds are not in my favor. 

But am I gonna walk away? 

HECK NO. 

Krystal is my friend, and I love her to pieces- even when she can make me second guess what I'm doing and when she is sometimes a little to passionate about some things. She's my friend... my best friend... I can't, and won't, leave her... 

Josie actually had left Krystal because she felt like Krystal was too much of an emotional person to carry. She couldn't take the stress. 

I realize now that my friends are not just people I care about. They're almost family. And even though Josie got up and walked away, it doesn't mean that I won't. Melody and Krystal need me. And I need them. 

Friends are some of the weirdest things in the world. You understand them so well, and they tell you all they're secrets, and you tell them yours... And overall... It's a really beautiful thing. 

I've never really have experianced true friendship before.. But now. I know who I can depend on, who loves me, and who will always have my back. 

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ADVICE: Friends may be a lot of work, but don't ever let them down. You'll just let yourself down.