Laurel's Pov

As we walk up the steps of an apartment, I try to process all of what Harley had told me.

"So your ex-fling, who is an hired assassin, is trying to kill you? Why?"

"Something about I almost got him killed on the last mission. Who knows?"

She reaches up and right on the top of the door frame she pulls down a key.

Who's place is this anyway?

She opens the door and we both walk inside of the damp feeling apartment. "Oakie you home?" She calls out.

"Who's Oakie?" I ask out loud.

"Just a friend. Oakie?" She calls out again as she walks deeper inside of the apartment.

I soon notice that the so called rugs started to feel mushy under my feet.

"Harl-" I feel something wrap around my neck and gasp as it starts to squeeze.

"Oakie!" I look over and Harley was hugging some red haired woman with vines covering her lady parts.

"Harley, what are you doing here? Weren't you in blackgate?"

"I got out on good behavior."

While those two were shooting the breeze I was slowly getting my life choked out of me!

"Harl..." I feel my eyes roll in the back of my head.

"Oh, Oaki-"

"Ivy."

"Potato, tomato. Anyways my friend and I need a place to hide out."

The thing around my neck keeps getting tighter and I start to feel my pulse slow down.

"Oh my babies are restless. Let her go." The wild woman says to some funny looking plant.

It unraveled from my neck and I suck in a lung full of air.

I stare at the ceiling and my last thought was how I'd rather be in the cage again.

That's when I black out...

"She is kinda pretty."

"Yeah, if yah like tha mysterious beauty type. But he's mine and I won't give him to tha likes of her."

"Harley, you need to dump that clown loser already. Didn't you say you had a think for Deadshot?"

"Yeah, but he doesn't have tha charm like my Puddin' yah know."

I wake up and I feel something soft under me.

I get up slowly and notice I'm on the couch.

I hear Harley and her friend talking in the distance and I rub my neck.

It feels tender to the touch.

"That's going to bruise." My voice sounds a little rough but what can you do when your windpipe was close to being crushed like a bendy straw.

Harley and the woman came back into the room.

"Oh you're alive. See Oakie she didn't kick the bucket."

"Ivy, and I'm glad to see my baby didn't kill you as intended."

"Yeah, who are you?" I ask as I try not to raise my voice.

"Poison Ivy. But only my close friends call me Pamela."

"Or Oakie." Harley chimes in as she sits beside me.

Pamela rolls her eyes and walks off picking up what looks like a watering can on her way down the hall.

"Ivy said we can stay herea for a little while. I mean Mistah J's joke didn't go as plan and I'm surea he's pretty mad at meh."

"Then why do you just leave him?"

She looks at me with a sad smile.

"Cause, he's all I got and I love him. Innit crazy? I was once this great doctor at Arkham Asylum and it took the Joker three sessions and I turn into this." She says as she motions down her body.

"Wait you use to be a doctor?"

If what she's saying is true then what kind of person is he to turn a doctor into a villain?

"Yep." She yawns and lays back on the couch beside me.

"I just wish I never fell for that clown prince..." Harley lays her head on my lap and I lean away from her a bit.

"Yeah, well when you wake up we should keep running. Great, not only are we running from an assassin, but now a clown..." I sigh and hear gentle snoring coming from Harley.

I let my head lean back but wince from my neck wound and sit up.

"She's hopeless." I look over and see Pamela looking at Harley.

"I guess that's love."

Pamela scoffs.

"If love is broken noses, busted lips, and a few broken ribs then I never want to be in love."

"He beats her?" I ask.

"The last time she came to me, she had came here limping. She told me that he had pushed her out of a moving car."

I grind my teeth as I look down at the broken girl laying on my lap.

If I see him again, I'll kill him....

Harley slept on my lap for about an hour.

"Here, some herbs for that bruise on your neck."

"Thank you." I take the little jar and sniff it.

It smells like roses and mint.

Harley jerks on my lap and I see a pained look on her face.

I smooth her hair down and hum a little song so it calms her down.

"You are my sunshine, my only sunshine. You make me happy when sky's are grey. You never know dear how much I love you. Please don't take my sunshine away..."

Harley's eyes flutters open and she looks up at me.

"I thought an angel was sinin' tah meh."

"Uh, thanks." She gets up and stretches.

"Ladies, I have to go and gather a few things from my garden outside. I believe tonight is a garden salad night."

"Ew, Iv, yah sure know how tah ruin eatin'." Harley hops up and leaves me on the couch.

"So, how long has Harley stayed with the Joker?"

"About five years give or take. I'll be back, if you want there's some food in the kitchen. Also, thank you. Harley isn't use to that kind of kindness."

"All I did was sooth her while she slept." Pamela gives me a side smile.

"It's the little things that gives us happiness." She leaves me alone and I decide to put the stuff from the jar on my neck...

Joker's Pov

I walk down the corridor and open the big doors of a meeting room.

"Ha, ha, ha, ha, ah-ha. Nice place here fellas all though I'd have to say I would have chosen a better spot."

"Who let the freak in here?" One mob boss says.

I'm going to stab him in the throat first just to prove a point.

"Give me one reason why I shouldn't have my boy pull your head off." Another mob boss says with a sneer directed at me.

"How about a magic trick? Does anyone have a pen? Ah, you seem to sir." I say to the first mob boss who has spoken.

I walk over and his guys start to get up but I pull open my jacket revealing a few very well equipped bombs.

"If I were you I'd sit back, down." I then look at the mob boss and take his pen from his jacket pocket."

"Careful with that clown freak. My old man gave me that pen."

"Is that so? Hm, it'll be quick. Now I'm going to make this pen disappear. Watch. Now you see it..."

I click the pen and then stab it right in the middle of the mob bosses throat.

Blood squirts across the table and I see everyone freak out.

I love this job.

"Ta-da! Now you don't."

I hold the string to the bombs and they all glare at me while the guy I stabbed chokes out and bleeds to death.

"Now that I have everyone's undivided attention, lets get down to business. Now let's talk about the main issue here. Not the police, not the lawyers, not even the dirty mayor. No, lets talk about Batman."

"What about him?" One guy interrupts.

"For starters you're all afraid of him. Look at me, he had put me away in that asylum and I'm out right now, unafraid of him. But all of you? You're free and you're all shivering in your boots at any whisper of his name. You call yourselves mobsters, but in actuality you're all pathetic, I mean, what happened? Did your balls drop off? Hm? You see I have a plan, that's so brilliant that it's hilarious."

"And what is that plan?"

I raise my brow and look at the mobster down the line.

"If I tell you the plan then it won't be funny and I don't do non-funny jokes."

"Then why tell us you have a plan? Why not just do it yourself?"

"Because gentlemen if you're good at something you never do it for free. Which calls for your assistance with a few things such as money wise."

"You've peeked my interest. How much you want?"

I clear my throat and look around the room.

"Uh, half."

Everyone in the room laughs.

"You're crazy."

I glare at the mobster taking.

"No, I'm not. No, I'm not. When you are ready to make a deal give me a call."

I toss a joker card on the table and stand up with my finger on the string in case anyone tries anything.

The moment I leave the room I get a call on my phone.

"What?" I hear coughing on the other line.

"Boss they're gone."

"Who's gone, idiot."

"Harley and the girl."

I hang up on him and dial Harley's number.

It rings and goes straight to voicemail.

"Harley sweetheart, where are you and Laurel? As a matter of fact I want you back at the house now and if I get back and you two aren't there..." I hang up and crack my knuckles knowing exactly where they are.

I told her next time I find her at that woman's house that she was going to regret it.

I think a good baseball bat will suffice...

Laurel's Pov

Harley and I sat in front of the television watching cartoons.

"Did yah see that? Did yah! Ahahahaha!"

I roll my eyes at Harley and decide to go get something to eat from the kitchen.

As I look in the fridge I hear Harley snort a laugh and sigh.

She's like a big kid, I swear.

I take out an apple and walk back into the living room.

"This show cracks me up I swear."

"Harley how old are you?"

She narrows her eyes at me. "Its rude to ask a lady that, kid."

"I'm just curious, you clearly are in your thirties...or are you?"

"Shuddup!" She throws her shoe at me but I doge it and laugh.

Wait did I just laugh?

She looks at me and she starts to laugh as well.

"You're like my little sistah. Man I miss her."

"You have a sister?" I ask.

"Well duh, I have one. What you think I was raised by wolves or somethin'?"

"I guess I just always thought you were...I don't know an only child."

"Nah, I had a big brotha and a little sistah. She was so cute, I could just eat her up. You know I was tha one who taught her how tah do gymnastics? She was scared tah do the high beam but when she did it, she looked so proud of herself. I miss tha kid..."

The sad look on her face made me think of her as more of a human and less of a crazy woman.

I scoot off of the couch and sit next to her on the floor.

"Why don't you go see her?"

She shrugs.

"I don't want her tah know about what I do yah know, she use tah look up tah meh."

"I understand, I guess. I mean I never had siblings. But I wish I had one, a brother or sister. I wouldn't have cared just as long as I wasn't alone playing with my toys."

Harley surprised me by giving me a hug.

"How about I be yah sistah? I'm not as bad as yah think."

I smile at her offer.

Well while we're away from the madness and chaos, I guess we can be pretend sisters.

"Sure why not." We both smile at each other and she kneels.

"Oh lemme do yah hair. It'll be perfect!"

"Okay, okay, don't yank my hair out of the root Harley."

"Harleen, call me Harleen."

"Harleen." She giggles after I say that and she parts my hair using her nails.

"Oh this is gonna look so pretty just yah wait and see."

I guess she isn't so bad...even though her voice annoys me...

I woke up leaning against Harley's shoulder and I get up to stretch.

I check the clock and smell something good.

I walk away from a sleeping Harley and see Pamela cooking in the kitchen.

She turns and gets a few spices from her cabinet.

"Did I wake you?"

"No...so what are you cooking? It doesn't smell like a garden salad."

She laughs and motions me over.

"Open."

I open up and she puts a spoon in my mouth.

"Mmm, this is good."

"It's my father's recipe. It's stew, I figured you and Harley would want something more filling instead of a salad."

I place the spoon in the sink and clean it while Pamela cooks.

"Can I ask you something?"

"If I say no is that going to stop you?" She says as she peeks in her oven.

I like her.

"How are you and Harley... bad guys?"

"You really don't get out much huh?"

"I'm not from Gotham. Plus my parents keep me busy with boring things."

She turns off her oven and takes out what seems like rolls then places them on a cooling rack.

"Let's just say I didn't choose this way. A man made me this way. I guess the same goes for Harley."

"Yeah, she told me how she was a doctor and the joker turned her that way."

"Men, they're only good for one thing and half of the time they screw that up."

"Amen tah that." Harley says at the door as she stretches.

She grabs a bowl and sits at the table.

"Guess we should eat." Pamela hands me a bowl and she scoops in some stew and I take a roll then sit down.

Harley hops up and goes to the drawers.

She takes out some silverware and hands me a spoon.

If you were to tell me I was going to be having dinner with Harley Quinn and Poison Ivy I swear I would call you a loon but here I am.

As I go to take my first bite I smell something and cough.

"What is that smell? Harley did you fa-"

"Wasn't me." She coughs as well and we both hear the door being kicked in.

"Go!" Pamela points and her plants start to attack the intruders.

Harley and I take our chances and start to run off towards the back exit but someone grabs me.

When I turn to see who it was all I see is a gas mask.

"Let...me...go..."

I feel weak and I fall against my attacker.

The last thing I saw was Harley laying on the floor at the exit...

I smell something in the air and it smells like old spice?

I open my eyes and I sit up feeling like my brain was just scraped out of the base of my skull.

I look around and I see I'm in his room.

I throw the sheets off and make a run for it but the moment I open the door I was moved back all because the joker stood there with a towel wrapped around his waist and his hair dripping wet.

"And where do you think you're going beautiful? Out on another rondeau?"

He didn't have his war paint on so I was face to face with the scars and the man.

I keep my eyes above neck level and swallow hard.

"Where's Harley?" I manage to muster up.

"You don't need to worry about her." He reaches for my chin but I back away.

"What is that?"

"What's what?" He reaches again but this time I slap his hand away.

He smiles at me and my heart drops.

I go to scream but he pins me down on the floor with one hand and with the other he looks at my neck.

"Who did this?" He snapped making me grow quiet instantly.

...

"Who? Did? This? Laurel?" He runs his finger across my neck and I swallow hard but say nothing.

"You won't talk? Fine, I'll get Harley to tell me."

He gets up and I scramble up.

"No, do-"

He slams the door in my face and I try to open it but it won't budge.

"Mistah J I don't kn-"

I hear a crash and I start banging on the door.

"Don't you hurt her! Don't you dare hurt her!" I scream my lungs out as I try to open the door.

"Tell me, Harley!" He says in a voice that reverberated in the entire house.

I hear a scream and then it was quiet.

1...

2...

3...

"HAR...HARLEY!!!"

*************************************

Hey guys! I know this story is way past over due and I want to thank all of you guys for reading this book and for the awesome comments and messages like I didn't think this book would be even cool but eh, I've got another joker book that I'll release it will star the current joker aka Jared's joker I know a lot of people have seen the trailer to the suicide squad and idk guys I like his joker too and the laugh! Omg if you guys want after I finish the first chapter I'll let you guys read it button guys gotta comment and tell me if you want me to publish it! Well gotta go have a great summer guys and up up and away!!! :P