Percy

A few weeks later, and I was driving Finn to the prison to see his mom.

Mind you, he wanted to. He sat me down after a bit and he said that, even though she did like try to choke him as a baby, he wanted to see his mom.

Which, I get it. I was like that with my dad when I first realized I had the chance to see him and meet him. Finn doesn't have any memories of his mom, just a few photos around the house from when we were in college and when he was just coming home for the first time.

That's all he has, and when he asked me to visit her, it was hard to say yes at first. But after a few minutes, I started to kind of recall how it was when I'd ask mom about my dad and how much I hated that she knew nothing. Or at least, never said anything.

Finn needed this. If I didn't let him go now, when I'm there just in case it goes bad, he would go when he's older and out of the house and who knows what could happen then.

We pulled up to the visitor parking lot and he was definitely a little nervous.

"Hey, es ist okay." I assured him, rubbing his arm. "Bist du dir sicher?"

Hey, it's okay. Are you sure about this?

He nodded his head and got out of the car. We walked to the front desk, where a women around 25 was. Making her way up the chain, I'm sure.

"Guten Tag," the women started off, flashing a smile. "Bist du hier für einen Besuch?"

Good day. Are you here for a visit?

"Ja, Celine Wihel bitte."

Yes, Celine Wihel, please.

After a minute or so, we were brought to a little room and asked how we knew her and I said she was my ex, Finn's mother. Once that was over, we were taken into a room that had a two way mirror. They told us that there would be a guard behind each door and somebody watching through the two way, just in case. Being we said she could be not handcuffed in here.

I also had to prove I could take down someone if they tried to attack. So we're good.

Once we were in and set up, they brought her in and she's changed a bit. Her hair was short now. She always wanted to cut it, but she was afraid it wouldn't look good. And I mean, it did.

As much as she can for in hell, I still feel bad that she's here. I mean, it's like Luke. He had potential and he was mostly a good person. But he did a shitty thing and it got him to a shitty place and I just... Feel bad.

Like, she deserved punishment. She tried to choke Finn. He was an infant. Basically newborn.

But 25 years in jail? For having one bad night?

I don't know. I guess we'll see what become if it for her.

"What do you mean I have a visitor?" Celine asked her guard as they came in the room. "It's not therapy day and I haven't had a visitor ever."

"I don't know, ma'am." He told her. "But you have two visitors today. Don't mess this up, otherwise your probation will be extended."

She nodded her head, saying that that made sense.

He took her handcuffs off and left the room to observe.

She recognized me. And being from England originally, we spoke English quite a bit. It was her first language. She's fluent in German, though. A Citizen and all.

"Percy?" She asked, and I felt so bad that I could see that she was a little bit terrified that I was here. I haven't seen her since they arrested her.

I gave her a half smile.

"Yeah." I confirmed for her, and motioned at our son, who was kind of by the door, just in shock and unsure about what to do. "somebody finally asked to see you."

Celine looked over at Finn and she knew. Of course she did. And she broke down, in tears.

I had to put my hand up to assure the guard that it was okay when she hugged him and then me, which was weird.

"What... Why?" I asked, hesitant to return the hug and she pulled away, wiping away the last few years. As of now.

"You let him visit." My ex-fiancé explained. "Had it been the other way around, I never would've allowed him to do that."

I shrugged.

"Yeah, but you also knew grew up with both of your parents there." I tried to explain why I would let him be here with her. "and I remember when I met my dad for the first time and he knows like a little about you. While I mean, you're definitely here for a reason, and he knows why. But he still wanted to, and I'd rather him do it where I can be here just in case he freaks out or something. I doubt he will, but you never know."

So for a bit, I let them be and do their thing while I drew in the corner. They talked for a while. She apologized off the handle for what happened and told him how much she regrets not just telling me to go check because she was in a bad mood and really irritable and whatever else. So guilt is getting to her a little bit. Which was good to hear that she still has a heart. I'd never get back together with her, especially with Nico and all. But maybe when she gets out she can be a part of his life.

He told her a lot of things he's done. He made her a painting the other day based of a photo from when we were in  college. She absolutely loved it, that he got my artistic side.

As planned, he did go to meet up with a few of his friends after about two hours, so I for to talk to her one on one.

"You uh... You did a really good job," she told me as I sat down across from her, my sketchbook behind me. "Raising him and all. I uh... I'm sorry."

"I know." I assured her. "I'm not deaf, I know. I kind of figured you would be when we were on our way here. You're getting there, though, right? What, 8 years left?"

"Who knows, they've been messing with my release date a bit." She told me, shrugging. "my probation would just be a lot longer. Which, I'm okay with. It can get boring here. But yeah, we're getting there. I'm assuming this will probably determine stuff with that, too. How well I react with him and you and what not..."

Celine stopped for a second, her eyes watered up.

"Sorry," she apologized again, trying to blink away the tears. "I uh... It's been a lot."

"It's okay, you basically met your son for the first time in 17 years." I assured her. "Crying is reasonable. Have you picked up any hobbies since you've been here? I don't know what you're allowed to do, but..."

She shrugged and thought for a minute. Told me she still does a little writing, but not a lot. Just here or there. They work out here a lot. Group trainings. Says it helps get her mind off things.

"Things?" I questioned. "Like what?"

"Just..." Celine started, holding her breath for a minute. "everything? I don't really know. It gets kind of lonely and so I have a lot of time to think and for me that's probably a bad thing, but I don't really know what's else I'm supposed to do. It's not... Sorry, you probably don't care about how much I hate this."

"No, I do." I insisted. "Like you said, you should've passed it to me, but you didn't and one thing led to another and the punishment was a bit more intense than either of us expected. Are you okay, mentally?"

Being honest, she shook her head.

"It's hard to make friends here when most people are sort of shitty in my area." Celine tried to explain to me, and I got that. That's how I felt about my dad and trying to just associate with him a lot. Not this intensely. "I uh... They have a therapist come here once a week and I talk to her a lot and she's pretty sure that it's depression but it's not severe enough where like they feel it's urgent to send me over to be tested because there's a list and I'm not going to kill myself tonight so like... Yeah, no. I kind of went off after a few years and it's just been steadily getting worse. It's not like I get visitors. I've been here 17 years and you guys are the first."

That made me feel kind of shitty.

"Oh." I remarked. "I'm sorry we didn't—"

"No, it's okay." She insisted. "I'm glad I got to see Finn when I did, by his choice. I don't blame you for not coming, I wouldn't either. I'm sure between raising him, college, work, and probably dating, you were busy. We're not together, and I don't think we ever will be again, so like, I don't blame you. I'm not your priority. I shouldn't be."

"I know, I mean... I just feel bad that others never visited." I tried to explain that. "that's not right. But I guess it is what it is. It'll be okay, though. I promise. Guilt is obviously eating you alive. But Finn is okay with you being there and honestly, I am, too. For whatever it counts. Like you said, we won't get back together or anything. But I think he needs you in his life. We've had a lot going on lately, so I think he'll appreciate being able to come here from time to time and talk to you."

She smiled.

"That uh... That's good to know." Celine remarked. "Really good to know. You've been okay, though? Finn didn't say much about you directly outside of that you guys do stuff together quite a bit still. That and he mentioned that for a few weeks you were kind of weird and distant, but he thinks you're good now."

"Yeah!" I confirmed, nodding my head and sighing. "Those weeks were um... We stayed in New York for a bit. I was offered a job and whatever, it paid good and it was close to my parents. But you know what happened there when I was younger. Eventually it kind of caught up with me and I had an episode and it was bad for a few weeks before we decided to come back here so. It was nice to see everyone, but mentally it just fucked me up."

"Understandably so." She agreed and let off a half smile. "You've been okay outside of that, though?"

"Mhm!" I repeated. "It's been pretty good. I like my job, not a ton of people can say that. I uh... I did decide to switch my major to art. So I'm an art professor now. It's fun. Have been for a good amount of years now."

"That's cool!" Celine insisted and she smiled, which was nice to see that visiting her did help. Both her and Finn, and even me a bit. Close some old doors and yeah. "Have you... I mean it's been 17 years so can I assume you got married or something? I mean, everyone loved you in college."

I chuckled.

"No, not quite." I broke the news to her and sighed. "raising Finn and also working and going to college took up a lot of my time. So I didn't date really. Maybe like three serious relationships? Maybe. And then like, when Finn was old enough to understand what I told him more, about 5, I ended up adopting a baby girl, so. That took even more time. But now, I mean, I'm engaged. The kids seem happy about it. Excited."

"Aw, that's amazing." She responded and smiled. "Are they around our age or... Girl? Guy? If I remember right, you are bi."

"You do remember correctly." I confirmed. "guy. I don't know if I ever told you about him, he was a friend when I was younger, from New York. Nico. Our relationship was always weird because I watched his sister die and there was a miscommunication about that. But he adopted Carlos and him and Finn went to school together and they wanted to hang out so I said they could and we reunited and yeah. I learned that be was gay after asking if he had a wife."

"Oh, yeah!" She recalled a story I must've told sometime. "you told me a little about him. He like went through Tartarus before you did and he sort of hated you but he also didn't."

"Yup." I remember those days. I wouldn't want them for my kids. "That was him. Turns out he acted out like that because he was very persistent about not coming out and apparently he had a crush on me, so. He said he moved in and then I came back and it was still there and I'm not going to complain."

She smiled and said that that was good to hear. She was happy that I was able to move on with my life. That I was so open with Finn about her. About what she did, but who she was outside of that. How he had the option to see her if he wanted.

And he did.

Which is what brought us here.

To a visitation room in a jail.

Life is wild sometimes.

Finn

"Did it go okay?" Fredric asked me as I met up with him, Georgia, and Simone. "Or like...?"

"Yeah!" I told them as we walked into a little restaurant to get some lunch. "I mean, I didn't really know what to expect because it was like one time, you know? And she like recognized Dad first, of course and she was a little afraid almost because she didn't know what to expect and he said that somebody wanted to finally see her and she like broke down crying and she gave me a hug and we talked for almost two hours. I think her and dad are talking a little bit now. Catching up maybe. But it was good. I might visit another day."

"That's good!" Fredric insisted, giving my hand a squeeze. "I'm proud of you."

I smiled. I've pondered asking Dad about visiting Mom for a while. A couple years. I just never knew how and he was never sour about her when I'd ask, I just never asked. I would chicken out.

"Do you think anything will happen with your mom and dad?" Simone did bring up a decent point. But I knew my answer to that.

"In terms of like getting back together or something? No." I insisted. "Dad's really happy with Nico. They uh... I can't remember if I sent it to the group or just Fredric, but he finally did propose on Friday. Before he had class they like went out on a picnic for breakfast or lunch or whatever and he finally got his head out of his ass and asked. He's had the rings since we were here before we moved back. But they're happy. My mom and dad will probably talk and be friends of sorts. I think he's forgiven her a bit. Not completely, but I don't blame him. That's a lot. It would be nice if they just wouldn't fight constantly, and neither of them fought."

"Your dad has always been a pretty forgiving guy." Georgia remarked, and I nodded my head, agreeing with that.