*Next day
Emily's POV

"Wake up JJ I got us breakfast" I say while pulling the covers below her face.

"Can I stay in bed a little longer. I still don't feel to great"

"Yeah of course. Your meds are on the bedside table with a glass of water when you ready to take them" I tell her.

"Okay thank you Em"

"No problem. I'll be in the living room if you need anything" I give her a small smile before walking away.

It's not going to be like yesterday. And if it is I can always call Garcia. Or ask her what to do.

I stay in the living room and wait for JJ. I have a loud noise in the room and run over to find JJ on the floor.

"JJ! What happen?"

She's laying unconscious on the floor.

"JJ wake up!" I grab ahold of her arms and help her into my lap. She slowly opens her eyes a few seconds later and blinks a few time to adjust them to the light again.

"JJ are you okay?" I ask.

"It's nothing. I'm fine. I just stood up a little to fast"

"You need to eat something, then you won't pass out"

She lets out a small sigh and nods. "Fine"

I help her up slowly so she doesn't get to lightheaded. She can still barely walk so instead I just pick her up and walk out with her in my arms. I set her down on the couch and bring over some of her food. I walk back into the bedroom and grab her meds and the water.

"Eat first, then meds" I tell her.

"I know, I know"

I sit down next to her and eat some of my food.

"When I'm done can I go back to sleep" she asks me while staring at the floor.

"Yeah of course. You don't have to ask me to go to sleep JJ" I move my hand to put it on her arm but she flinches.

"JJ I'm not going to hurt you"

"I'm sorry" she tells me.

"Don't apologize it's okay"

She finishes her food pretty fast and then she takes her meds. After she's done she put the plate in the sink and walks back into the room.

"Can you come take a nap with me?" She asks.

"Yeah I'll be right there"

I put the rest of my food in the fridge to finish it later. I walk over to the bedroom with JJ and I put my arm over her as we both fall asleep.

JJ's POV

I'm tossing and turning in my sleep. I hear a very faint voice but I can't make out what they are saying.

*Dream

Im in the room with Emily again. She's losing consciousness while bleeding out.

"Emily your going to be fine, just keep your eyes open for me"

"I love you JJ, so much"

Emily closes her eyes and Im crying. Im screaming for medics but no one comes. I check for a pulse and I feel nothing.

"NOOO, this isn't how you die Emily. Not like this. We were supposed to be together forever"

*End of dream

"JJ wake up it's me Emily. Your safe. It's just me and you here" Emily says.

I shoot up in bed and open my eyes. I'm breathing heavy and shaking.

"JJ it's okay, your safe. I'm here for you" Emily tells me.

I start crying uncontrollably and Emily wraps me into a hug. She rests my head on her chest so I can listen to her heartbeat.

I tap my shaking fingers together to the beat. I do this for about 4 minutes until I fully calm down.

1 2 3
Repeat
1 2 3
And so on

Emily sees what I'm doing and she smiles to herself.

"Are you okay now JJ?"

"Yeah, thank you"

"What was it about?" She asks.

"You"

"Me?"

"You were dying in my arms again. But this time you actually died. I watched you bleed out, I checked for a pulse and felt nothing. You left me again"

"JJ baby I'm right here"

"What about when you decide to leave again. You're going to get sick of me and then you're going to leave and I'll be all alone-"

She pulled me up to face her and she kissed me. We stayed here until she pulled away for air.

"Im not going anywhere JJ, I promise"

"That's what you said last time" I had tears rolling down my face. She took her hand and wiped my tears.

"It wasn't my choice to go and I would never choose to leave you"

"Maybe you should just go and get it over with. I'm nothing. You are going to figure that out soon enough and then leave. So just go already" I get out of her arms and push myself to the wall.

"JJ I don't want to leave you. I love you. I never want to be away from you"

I stare into her eyes not saying anything. My sweet Emily. What gives me the right to pretend like I am enough for a woman like Emily? Me who can barely function without help. Me, who has nothing to offer. Me, who is broken beyond repair. Why do I act like I have a chance.

"Why do you care about me?" I ask her.

"Because I love you. You're an amazing person, you love helping people even if it hurts you. You would do anything for the people you love"

"What if I'm not that person anymore. I was that person 6 months ago. But I changed. What if that's not who I am anymore" I ask sadly.

"You are still that person JJ. And I will love you no matter what" she gives me a soft smile with her puppy dog eyes that make me feel safe.

"Everything is just so different Emily. I'm different. How could you still possibly care about me. Why do you even care if I'm alive"

"JJ I can't lose you. The 5 months I was away was the worse thing I ever had to do. I wasn't aloud to speak to you. I wasn't aloud to see how you were doing. It was terrible. I honestly think death would have been easier then to live without you. I don't think I could make it without you again. Those 5 months were hell. But I knew I would see you again at some point. And I now know how much I hurt you by leaving and I wish I didn't. But I can't change what happened no matter how much I wish I could. I just want you back. I need you back" Emily was also crying at this point.

"I'm sorry, I didn't realize how hard that must have been for you. We were all struggling because we lost 1 person but you lost 5 people" (A/N I'm not including Hotch because technically he knew and still talked to her)

She pulled me in for another hug and we sat here. We had a long ways to go but together we would make it. It might take a while but I will try everything to get back to the way it was before.