My head felt like someone hit it with a crowbar as I slowly woke up. I groaned in pain and felt a big bump on the back of my head as I ran my hand through my hairs.

It took me a view moments until I was able to open my eyes to look where I was but I didn't see much because of my headache that made my surroundings look blurry.

Confused at first, I slowly stood up from what appeared to be a couch, holding my head and blinking to clear my sight at the room.

Indeed, I started to see a view shapes and colors and the first thing that caught my attention was something big and purple right in front of me.

I shook my head and suddenly, my memory about the recent happenings came back to mind. My heart was beating at a higher pace and I smiled as I was able to see Joker's face.

"Baby, you have no idea how much I've missed you!" My voice was shaking and I was about to hug him - only to be pushed back down on the couch with Joker's right forearm on my throat.

"You don't get to say such a thing!" He yelled at me and I tried to catch my breath as he glared at me with his outraged, green eyes. "You don't get to say anything!"

My head was starting to hurt from his loud voice and I tried to push his arm away to breath normal but Joker was just too strong for me. "Wh-What are you talkin' about, puddin'?" I asked, trying to figure out why he was mad at me.

Instead of answering right away, he grabbed my collar and widened his eyes in anger before throwing me over to a nearby wall.

I quickly tried to stand up but my legs were shaking too hard as Joker walked over to me. "For the love of god, what on earth did you think you were doing, huh?" His deep voice was sending waves of fear through my bones and he pulled me up by my hairs.

Suddenly, I knew what he was talking about - at least I thought so. "That-That wasn't anything serious! Blacky and I are just friends."

"That was not what I was talking about, you goddamn idiot!" Joker punched my face so hard I blacked out for a while.

As I woke up, the first thing I noticed was incredibly intense pain in my back and Joker leaning over me with his hands around my throat. My arms felt the wooden desk Mistah J always wrote his plans down on - but it was broken in two with me laying between the two parts.

Joker tightened his grip on my throat and I started to panic as I couldn't breath anymore. "You think you can leave for a year and just walk back and everything's normal?"

"I'm sorry, puddin', but th--" I was cut off as he growled, pulled me up by my hairs and grabbed the back of my head right before he slammed it into the mirror on the left wall.

I squinted my eyes as the sharp glass cut into the skin of my face and I fell down on the floor, shaking in pain and shock while quietly cursing myself for being so dumb and thinking he would be glad to see me after I left without a word.

"I told you not to call me puddin'!" His voice sounded dull and I opened my eyes, blinking at the blood that dropped into them but I didn't dare to touch my face that was numb of pain and probably full of glass splinters.

"I'm so...so sorry." My voice didn't actually make a sound because my back and lunges were hurting from him slamming me so hard on the desk that it broke. I was sure that fractured at least one of my ribs.

I felt a hand in my neck and hoped that Joker could accept my apology. But then I remembered he didn't even hear it.

"Do what you can do best, get out of my eyes!" I heard him yelling, next thing I noticed was being literally thrown out and landing hard in the little piece of snow outside. "And this time, don't you dare come back!" The door was slammed and I slowly pushed myself up with my arms shaking.

My face was burning with the wounds and I wasn't able to breath straight because of my hurting ribs but none of my injuries gave me as much pain as my heart. It was my fault he reacted like that. My fault, because I was so stupid and assumed he would be happy after I left all the work to him for a year. 'Stupid Harley.'

I slowly started walking away from his hideout as it began to snow. It was still dark and I had no idea where to go or what to do at the moment. 'How can you be so dumb?' I thought, my eyes started to water and I had my lips pressed together, still in shock.

'I made him hate me.' I blinked at the cold wind, making the first tears drop down my cheeks and causing the cuts on my face to burn even more.

I kept walking - maybe an hour, maybe a view minutes, then leaned against a wall as I felt far too cold and was too exhausted to continue. Also, I didn't want to.

It was like my body refused to let go of the shock and I couldn't let my tears out. I tried to pull myself together, tried to pretend that this was a bad dream but I failed. 'Useless brat.'

"Harley?"

Someone called my name and I immediately winced, expecting - for some reason - Black Seven to be mad at me.

I heard his footsteps in the snow and turned away, trying to hide my face as well as my throat since I was sure there were strangulation marks on it.

"What are ya doin' out here? Thought ya were off with ta lunatic?" Black Seven asked and I tried to sound convincingly happy. "I was just going ta get me a new gun."

Black Seven touched my shoulder and I winced again. "Why aren'tcha lookin' at me?" His voice sounded more curious than worried until he asked another question that I couldn't answer. "An' why's there blood in ta snow?"

I didn't say a thing, just tried to get away as more tears built up in my eyes, making my body shake. But Black Seven kept his firm but at the same time gentle grip on my shoulder and I accidentally turned my head to remove his hand.

His eyes widened and he gasped with his jaw dropping as I looked at him. "I..I..." My voice broke as I tried to explain but I just had no control over myself anymore.

Black Seven didn't say a word, he just pulled me into a tight hug and I still tried to hold back my tears.

"It's okay. Let it out." Black Seven whispered and somehow, this made my emotions just break out.

I bent my fingers down on his arms while burying my face in Black Seven's shoulder, starting to cry about what happened earlier. I cried about everything, my physical, but mainly the emotional pain and started shaking in shock.

"I'm-I'm s-such a di-disappointment." I sobbed and groaned, trying to control myself. But no matter how hard I tried, it only got worse and I just felt so bad for letting Mistah J down. 'You deserve this.'

"Who says that?" Black Seven asked in a soft, slightly shaking voice. "You're everythin' but a so-called disappointment." He stroke my back to calm me down but I didn't really feel that nor did I really hear his words. I just kept crying until I was out of tears.

Black Seven ran his hand over his face as he looked at mine, obviously trying to pull himself together or at least to cover his own shock. "Ya seriously need medical attention."

Still sobbing, I nodded and wanted to rub my eyes but Black Seven but his palms on my hands as I pulled them up. "There might be splinters close to your eyes."

I nodded with my whole body shaking - still not able to believe what Joker said to me. Words couldn't explain how much I hated myself right now.

"But Arkham isn't--" I started but Black Seven immediately cut me off. "Arkham?" He asked surprised. "I'm not takin' ya ta those amateurs. You're comin' ta my place."

"Okay. Thank you, Blacky." I said as he quickly picked me up so I didn't have to walk all the way back to his hideout.

'It's my fault.' This thought stuck in my head and I quietly started sobbing again as I thought about his last sentence. 'And now he doesn't want to see you ever again.' A view tears ran down my face and over the bloody cuts all over my face. 'Well done...'