The daylight flooded my office through two, large windows behind my black chair as I leaned back in it with a heavy, exhausted sight. My head was hurting and my eyes were burning as I closed them for a moment just to have a few seconds of anything similar to sleep.

I had no idea how much time I've spent watching the video of the security cameras in Joker's cell over and over again, but I only knew it was darkest night outside when I started. And the battery of the tablet Doctor Arkham handed me the second I entered this place died sever times.

Nevertheless, I had to watch the entire video one last time before my session with Joker started again. Maybe I missed something and I didn't want anyone to blame me if anything went wrong during our therapy sessions just because my attention wire off or I forgot about important details and triggered Joker. Again.

So instead of resting just one more moment, I tapped the replay button on the tablet's display and the hour long video started once again while I took a sip from my cold coffee.

No matter how many times I've been paying attention to the scene of him walking around and mumbling to himself, I didn't see the rage in his eyes that built up within a heartbeat. Almost as if he didn't know himself what happened to him.

Sure, he was smiling crazily every now and then, but he was more bored than angry, even the multiple approaches to the front door of his cell so he could talk to the guy outside didn't show any signs of aggression, just frustration, at best.

In comparison to the moment he ripped the straight jacket into pieces, he almost seemed as if he could control himself better. Which made me smile because obviously, my methods were working. It could've been such a great video of a patient who was making progress but no, Joker had to lose it once again.

As the guards started to invade the room, I narrowed my eyes, not letting Joker out of my sight for even a moment.

His movements were strange, although he demanded earlier in the clip he wanted the door to get opened so he could get out - as I suspected - he walked back as the guardsmen entered and didn't make an attempt to escape, he just killed two of them.

It might've been possible Joker had such a great inner conflict going on he actually just wanted something to release the tension and madness. It happened quite a lot when we were still together, he'd run around the city, shooting and stabbing strangers to be able to calm down from whatever thought that was on his mind.

That little detail was the similarity in his behavior when it came to killing people for no obvious reasons, it was always something he thought about too much that triggered these events. Another sign my methods were working and he actually started to develop something like a consciousness when it came to his memories.

I wasn't breaking him with my methods, that would've been impossible, anyway. But I did want him to understand - truly understand - that what he did and said was hurting people. And I hoped that I was at least partly healing him, because I knew the level of insanity that he was on was impossible to cure.

The screams of Joker in the video as the tall guy named Butch knocked him out with the tasers made me snap out of my thoughts. Sure, I've never heard him scream like this - or scream at all - before, at least not from pain...but he killed two of the person's guards that had the nickname Butcher in here. For a reason. This man knew no mercy when it came to inmates, and at least Joker was put in his place for once.

Sighing, I turned off the alarm of my buzzing phone which let me know that it was time for me to get ready for my session with Joker. Maybe it was selfish or crazy, but I was excited to know what made Joker snap like this. The more progress he made, the more money I got. That was the only reason I wasn't killing that lying piece of smiles for the crap he's done to me.

But without wasting a beat, I gathered my files with the notes I took about the video, about fifteen pages and left my office before making my way down the long, dark corridor.

"Good morning, Doctor!" One of the two guardsmen standing outside of the therapy room smiled and opened the heavy door for me which caused me to return the smile. As brutal and careless these men and women were when it came to inmates, as friendly and welcoming were they with the Arkham Asylum staff. Probably because they knew the doctors and psychiatrists had a really hard job to do as well.

"Thank you, Butch." I replaid and entered the room where two more men stood next to Joker who had his eyes narrowed at the table in front of him. Judging from his red eyes, he probably didn't sleep all night long, except the time he passed out from the electric shocks.

Without a word, I walked up to the chair across from him and placed my files on the table before I intertwined my fingers and letting my chin rest on my thumbs. "Well, patient, it looks like you had a rough night."

Joker didn't really react, he only let his head slightly sway from one side to the other while his lips moved as if he was talking to himself and his eyes followed invisible figures. He didn't even hear me.

Within a second, the guardsman standing to Joker's right side grabbed his messy, green hair that had some blood still stuck in them and pulled his head up, forcing Joker to look at me and he immediately snapped out of his zone, shaking his head and grinning as our eyes met.

"Oh, I'm sorry, Doctor Quinzel." His rough voice turned into a chuckle and the guardsman let go of his hair while Joker blinked once, obviously trying to get rid of whatever it was that he was thinking about so hard. "How was your date?"

Of course he had to ask. As predictable as his need to try and get into my mind or get details of my private life out of me. And just as easily to use against him.

"Nice. Very nice." I responded and opened the second file up while looking down at it through my glasses. "Candlelight dinner, watching a movie..." My words got a little more quiet and I tried to hold back a smile while running my hand through my hair. "...a couple of kisses that turned into something more...intense."

I was laughing on the inside as Joker gritted his teeth, not even trying to hide his anger about my explanation. Not that I wouldn't have been able to look through it if he attempted. But he was letting his emotions out once again and I wrote that down on one of the empty pages I brought with me.

"Oh, by the way." He continued, his voice had that dangerous calm sound but I just ignored it while I read through the notes of a doctor who took care of Joker's injuries yesterday.

"How's Jonny doing these days?"

My heart skipped a beat in sudden fear. Did he know about us? How? I didn't tell anyone who I was dating, at all. But he probably just tried to find out by calling out a few names, so I remained perfectly calm on the outside, not easing a beat to answer his question with another one.

"How am I supposed to know? He's your henchman." Not looking up from the papers, I ignored a frustrated breath that left Joker's lungs. What? Did he think I'd start shaking and let his question unnerve me the second he asked? That's just sad.

A quick moment of silence passed until Joker's mouth opened up once again, his eyes locked on my face and I felt his angry look with every fiber of my body.

"No."

I immediately spoke just before words could slip off his lips. Which sure as hell made Joker even angrier, but I wasn't here to let him ask me questions, I was the one asking him and I wouldn't participate in his mind games.

"I don't get paid to answer stuff you ask me. You answer me." How I loved making it clear who was in control, just as much as he loved hurting me just for the fun of it. Plus, I didn't have time for this crap anymore.

"And my first question is, what happened to you last evening?"

Finally, I looked up at Joker, my hands resting on my files and my face emotionless while I watched him tensing up inside the new straight jacket that was about two millimeters stronger now and taking a deep breath.

"I don't know, Doctor." He sighed and tilted his head back so I could look at the four, dark red and deep marks one of the tasters Butch used on him left under his chin. Now he was obviously trying to get empathy as a response of mine to his injuries. Dumb fact that I didn't care at all.

"You could tell me because the whole hour's a bit blurry." He suggested and looked at me again, his head now facing me again. I almost couldn't hold back a chuckle as I just waited for this sentence of his, but I was pretty sure he saw my excitement in my eyes.

"Well, first of all, letting the guardsmen tell you about my little meeting was part of an experiment." I admitted and picked up a pen from the table, writing down the fire of rage that started to burn in Joker's eyes. Now we started to talk.

"You didn't disappoint me, patient." My mind blurred slightly as I suddenly felt anger building up within me. Somehow, the thought of causing Joker emotional pain triggered something like hatred in me.

"I wanted to see how far you could take everything. Losing your sidekick. Getting locked up. Being out of control. Me not giving a drop of rotten pork sauce about your nonexisting emotions. And, boy, you didn't disappoint."

Joker's eyes became slightly more red and I stood up from my chair, my emotionless eyes glaring down at him while I ran my hand over my paper's where I had the entire plan written down. It was so satisfying to watch Joker being speechless and having no idea what to do. He couldn't. There was nothing he could do about this situation, and he probably knew it.

"Now to your question, which I'll gladly answer." The fog inside my head grew and I could feel my crazy thoughts returning within a heartbeat while my face showed nothing but coldness.

"What I think happened was that you started to think about me. You thought about the time we used to be together. You thought about revenge for the stuff I'm doing to you in here because as usual, everyone else is the problem, not you." Walking up to his side, I sat down on the edge of the table, almost right in front of Joker and continued to look down at him. I wasn't even starting.

"But you also had an inner conflict going on. You hesitated, should you really hurt me again? Would that be right? Wasn't there another way to get me back - the reason for your thoughts in the first place?"

The longer I spoke, the more I enjoyed Joker's hateful eyes that slowly but steady lost the rage, the hate, every kind of emotion. But I did see the frown on his face growing.

"I think you came to the conclusion that it'd be better to just kill me as the rage consumed you. You wanted the one thing back that you yourself threw away like garbage."

Now I leaned down to get a better look at his eyes before I grabbed his bottom jaw and forced him to look at me as Joker turned his face away in an attempt to at least shut my eyes out that had nothing left for him but hate.

"Look. At me." I spoke through my teeth and felt a smile growing on my face as our eyes met once again so my words had an even deeper impact on him.

"But you won't get it back. You won't get me back. Ever." My voice started to turn into a whisper and I could feel how much Joker was trying to hold his emotions back at my words.

"This is what you have done to me. You've opened my eyes for the shit-bag you actually are. You're the only person responsible for this. No one else. And by losing me, you lost the only person alive who'd ever care for you. Who'd cheer you up. Who'd blindly take punches for you. But now you got nothing."

The ringing bell which told me our session was over didn't make me stop, I wanted to get the stuff off my chest and tell Joker how much of a scumbag he was - is.

"No one will help you through this anymore. No one will come for you while you're in here. Because no one cares about you. No one."

For the first time in years, I noticed Joker's eyes getting watery and the redness grew while his breathing increased and he gulped. I let go of his chin, got off the table and grabbed my files as well as my pen while pushing some of my pink hair behind my ear and turned away from him.

"You used to have everything." I said as I made my way towards the front door, my hand already on the door know but I paused for a second as my words were kind of bringing the memories up that we both shared.

"But now, you have nothing. And I'll make you understand...make you realize just how alone you really are."