Before I begin the interview, I want everyone to know I'm not a bully and that any negative critics I say are not to offend or hurt the author. We are only trying to help. I hope you enjoy and learn from this review and please for RAMEN' sake, remember you asked us to do this.

First Impressions:

I do not know about other people but before I read the book I often judge it by the cover, title, and description. I know if it looks and sounds good, I usually read it right away. Though I think this might be a given for any avid reader. Your cover is basically the essence in what your story is going to be about in a way. The better the cover, the better the story because it means you are working earnestly for it to be so. The cover of your story could use some work. It is just an image of Sakura and that;s it. I know how hard it is to create a cover so, again, just my opinion, but covers help catch the reader's attention.

Another way to catch a potential reader's attention is to have a catchy title. A title is precisely like a picture, meaning it can capture a thousand words about the story without giving anything away about the plot. Your title is okay, if a little bland in my opinion, but again, this is my opinion, okay?

Writing a description of the story can be rather hard, and I understand completely as a fellow writer myself. You don't want your description to be too lengthy or even too limited. You also don't want to give too much of your story away to the reader either. That being said, I think your description could use a little bit more work as it was really short and a few grammar problems, the other than that it was okay. :)

Your Story's Plot

I like what you are trying to write even if I have seen similar plotlines in other Naruto stories about Sakura being bullied.

Your Story's Structure

So far what I have observed, your stories structure is a bit chaotic and rushed. I also noticed that the story had a few grammar issues and some details in description and emotions was lacking a bit.

Example of description: The wind was brisk tonight as it gently caressed Naruto's cheeks as if they knew he needed a lover. The sound of leaves crunching underneath Naruto's orange shoes matched to the rhythm of his heartbeat.

Example of emotion: Purple sparks around him and in his grief the world blends into muted colors. "Jiang-" someone is calling his name, but his grief is too much and, breathe, breathe . "Jiang." he's choking on something and why can he not get air in his lungs? There's a sting to his face and Jiang Cheng finds himself in cruel reality as his sworn brother, Wei Wuxian, stands over him with a look of concern in his gray eyes. "Wanyin, breathe." Jiang Cheng finds himself on the floor in the amidst of his damaged sorrow and rage. (from a story of mine)

Final Verdict on your story

I think you have something going that will definitely be a good story and I can see it definitely gaining popularity as well. :)

Final words from Crowillow

I know I probably came off relatively rude or harsh, but this is a review and the author consented to it. Also, please remember this is merely my opinion and other readers or writers may not agree with me on it. A review is nothing but free advice sometimes taken and other times not okay. I'm hardly the perfect writer myself, and I can guarantee you I'm learning something new about writing daily.

Cheer's mate!

-Crow