I l-

I l-

I l-

Harry chanted that in the back of his mind from the moment he left Draco. At first, he thought it was just a stutter of 'I'll miss you' like he'd followed it up with, but I'll has a completely different sound than 'I l-'.

But there was no way Draco would've said... that... 

... Would he?

Even if he had said it, or started to say it, Draco was having his rut. Saying that during Rut was like saying it while drunk- it didn't really mean anything.

Harry felt like pulling his hair out. 

He liked Draco. The past few months have been wonderful, and the last few days of dating the blond had been... Well. Wow.

They'd agreed to keep it between their close friends- Ron, Hermione, (unfortunately Seamus and Dean), Pansy, Blaise and Theodore- so the outward, public effects weren't prominent. 

The same day they started dating, Harry had been caught up with Ron and Hermione and Draco hadn't been seen, not even for meals. But, starting the next day, Harry had received a parcel at breakfast- a white box wrapped in tan paper, filled with the chocolates Harry had fallen in love with from the shop Draco apparently frequented, as well as the same type of rose that Harry had received the first time Draco had given him the gift of pheromone scent blockers and oils and, of course, the chocolates. 

Harry had given the ring back to Draco once he'd come back to Hogwarts, thinking he wouldn't need it anymore, but the same ring was also in the box he'd received the next morning, with a small note attached.

Keep the ring, and wear it. No one knows it's mine, and I don't think anyone except Hermione (Harry noted, amusedly, that Draco had scratched out the word 'Granger' before replacing it with Hermione) is smart enough to draw the conclusion that they're connected. It'll give you an emergency way out if you're in trouble. Plus, I just like seeing something of mine on you, without anyone else realizing. 

Before you say anything, I'm not possessive. Shut up.

- Your favorite

Harry had chuckled and obediently put on the ring, watching as Draco glanced up for a half second before rubbing the finger that he wore his own ring on, giving a half-second smile of approval. Evidently, Draco felt the small sting of connection as well. 

Harry had watched Draco, too. He'd seen such a different side of Draco that he'd genuinely forgotten how the Slytherin acted when not around just him. Draco had looked indifferent at best, and when Harry compared that flat, non-expressive face to the one he'd just seen a few minutes prior...

Harry felt the blush rise up on his cheeks and back of his neck and quickly changed his thoughts back to the last few days.

When Harry had been late to a class that same day, Draco had 'accidentally' dropped a glass vial full of explosive Titterbug Thoraxes, allowing Harry to sneak in without getting in trouble, even costing Draco 20 house points. Draco had denied doing it intentionally after, saying 'I was just so shocked you actually showed up for class that I dropped it. Complete accident.' Harry had just rolled his eyes.

The next day, another parcel from Draco. No chocolate this time, but rather a small cherry pie and a few cherry tarts. 

When they'd gotten a few moments in the corridors to themselves last night, Harry had accused Draco of trying to get him fat.

"You're crazy."

"You keep feeding me and sending me food!"

Draco had rolled his eyes at him. "You look happy when you're eating. And if I just happen to think you'd look hot as hell with a bit of meat on your bones, well, that's just a happy little side effect."

Harry smiled slightly at the memory. 

This morning, he'd grown slightly worried when he neither received a parcel nor saw Draco at breakfast. However, he'd instead received a very formal letter from Lauralee informing him that Draco had gone into rut and he was permitted to visit, and then told him about the magic restraints and the potions that Draco had on his desk. 

So, basically, that mixed with how Draco treated him before they got together...

 From the first day in class, not just sneering and kicking him off the second Harry had latched onto his leg. Helping him through his first heat. Staying even when Harry had broken his nose and given him a black eye. Writing notes for him, despite no one even asking him to do so- which meant that during class, Draco had thought about Harry completely unprompted. Not only that, but he didn't bully Harry about it like he would have previous years. He didn't spread rumors or make pins or even make jokes with his friends- he was completely and utterly... Civil. 

When he'd sat with Harry in the infirmary, despite Harry doing nothing but verbally and physically berating him, and Draco not using Harry's need to listen to everything he said to his personal advantage. Him pinning Draco down for almost a full day, fucking cuddling him... There was so much more that happened following his first ABO class. Draco willingly scent marking him, helping him through his heat, kissing him, making sure he was okay, spending time tucked into Harry's side... All so fast. 

It hadn't felt fast in the moment, but taking the actual days into consideration, it only took Draco, what, a month and a half to be spending almost every day with him? Caressing his hands, helping him with homework, listening to Harry rants and kissing him when he was fed up...

'Come here now. Mark me. Make me yours.'

'I'm not going to hurt you. I promise.'

'Just hold my hand. Please.'

'I can feel you. I can feel your heart beat, your arousal, your panic. I want it to be mine. I want you to be mine, little omega.'

'James. Your middle name is James. Harry James Potter, after your father.'

'I promised I'd never hurt you, sweetheart. I wouldn't lie to you.'

'I know what my ruts feel like. I can leave, I will chain myself to a goddamn bed if that's what I need to do to make you feel safe.'

'My promise remains, Harry. I'll never, ever hurt you.'

'Tell me you want it, that you consent, that you actually want this.' 

'That's it. Tell me what you need, love.'

'Don't think me helping you is entirely selfless'

Harry thought back to that. Draco had claimed it was because he found Harry attractive, but... Draco wouldn't do all of the stuff before that because he thought Harry was visually appealing, especially after their entire history. The more he thought about What Draco had been saying to him that made sense in the context but could have meant far more than just the words at face value, the more it seemed that Draco had liked Harry for far longer than he'd let on.

'You underestimate the lengths I would go to keep you sated, Potter.'

'Lets get you into bed, okay sweetheart?'

'Good, my love. That's all I want.'

Harry took a moment to recall the letter Draco had written. 'You shouldn't feel any pain from being apart from me. In fact, I'm fairly certain you won't have any trouble whatsoever from be being away.' Harry had always thought about that part as being a bit odd- how he'd specifically used the term 'you' to refer to Harry, but never himself, or even the both of them together.

Harry thought about what Draco had said just before Harry had asked him if he'd liked him. 'Without it, we're nothing. You don't actually like or trust me... You don't miss me, Harry, you miss my scent. You miss the Alpha. Not Draco. You don't give a shit about him and you know it.'

Again, he'd spoken purely about Harry, not himself. Thinking back more into their general daily conversations, Draco seemingly had spoken a lot about Harry, but never himself. They'd talked for hours every single day, and despite that, Harry realized all they'd ever talked about was himself, even if Draco divulged into the occasional conversation about himself, they never really told him anything- just empty filler that made it feel like they were talking about him.

Sly bastard, Harry thought to himself as he turned the final corridor towards the great hall. 

'Just admit it, you've gone soft,' Harry had accused not just days prior, and Draco's response had been 'for you? Always'. 

Fucking always, said while SMILING at him! Draco Malfoy! Smiling! At him!

Sure he could have said it just to be sweet, but Draco didn't do that. Draco spoke either through sarcasm or blunt truth, and Harry hardly ever found him expressing himself through hyperboles. 

Harry decided, as he was sitting down next to his friends at lunch, that he was going to go visit Draco after dinner. 

He had some questions to ask.