Jeon Areum's POV

We spent the next week driving around in the motorhome. First off we all decided that instead of rushing straight to find my potential mum we should lie low for a while and camp out in the countryside. We'd stop in places like abandoned car parks and fields, and one time even on the beach, and sleep there for the night.

Whilst living in the motorhome we've experienced our fair share of injuries; Chenle burnt his finger whilst trying to cook tteokbokki with Jisung, Jeno fell down the step leading outside the van, and pretty much everyone in the bunks has banged their head at least 50 times because they're not used to the space being so small.

Everyone is convinced Renjun and Jeno are dating. Every morning when we wake up they're in each other's embrace, cuddling up together like a newly married couple. When Jisung called them out one time Renjun retorted with a "fuck off it was cold last night" and that would be the end of it. None of us would believe them though.

I know Jaemin and I also sleep next to each other, but everyone knows it's because they made us share a single bed, and that there's no space whatsoever. Because we've slept next to each other for a week now, we don't have individual smells anymore. We both smell exactly the same. There is only one smell, and because we haven't showered in a while, that smell is disgusting.

I remember asking Jaemin to spoon, and at first I thought I was insane. That's what couples do. What if he gets the wrong idea? But then that first night as I was lying in his embrace my heart filled with a warm glow, and I felt really happy. It's kinda weird and hard to explain, but maybe it was a sense of protection? Comfort? Maybe even... Feelings?

This progressed over a week, until I finally decided that I had growing feelings towards Jaemin. I'd never felt this kind of way towards any other guy before, but maybe these feelings were just bonding on a sibling level, but then again, what sibling's heart races when they spoon their brother? That's creepy as shit.

I always had that suspicion that I was falling for him, but I spent most of my time pushing the thought to the side, paying it no attention, because I didn't want to believe it. Not because I didn't like Jaemin, that's far from the truth, but in fact it was because I believed he deserved someone much better than myself. I've never been in a serious relationship before, so what if I get bored? What if I end up hurting his feelings again? I don't think I could bear to look at that same face I saw at the party, that face that figuratively tore apart my entire being.

But then, him having so much impact on my thoughts and feelings must mean something? If I feel this strongly about him then would being with him actually work? But that brings up the question as to whether he still likes me or not, or even if he liked me in the first place? All this thinking could in fact be worthless if he doesn't like me, and if I do confirm my own feelings how am I supposed to keep my cool if he doesn't think the same way?

Well, I guess he must've been doing that this whole time if he has liked me.

I decided to speak to Haechan about it, telling him about my heart and it's strange actions. We had stopped for the night at the side of a country road, away from any sign of civilisation, and so I pulled Haechan away from the group and behind the van to speak with him.

At first he just blinked a couple times, asking me to repeat myself, but after I did so he burst out laughing.
"What the fuck's so funny you asshole!" I whisper yelled, shoving him hard in the shoulder.
"The irony!" He cried out, clutching his knees, still laughing. "I can't believe it."
"Knock it off." I mumbled. "The whole fucking world doesn't need to know."

After a swift second he calmed down, turning to face me.
"So you don't know how you feel?" He asked.
"More like I'm 95% sure I know, but I don't want to accept it." I replied.
"But you two are literally meant for each other." He retorted. "Why wouldn't you want to accept it? What's wrong with him?"

"You're asking the wrong question." I replied. "There's nothin wrong with him. It's what's wrong with me, that's the problem."
"I don't see a problem with you?" He leaned against the van. "You're the most confident girl- no, person I know, you're also the prettiest by far, so why are you hesitating?"
"What if he doesn't like me?" I whispered, head low.

"Ugh. Are you hearing yourself?" Haechan jokes around, pretending to sound disgusted. "That guy loves you to the fucking moon and back, just go and make it official already."
"He does?" I confirmed, and Haechan scoffed.
"Honey pleASE, it was so obvious and you knew it." Folding his arms across his chest, he he rolled his eyes before looking back at me again.
"I'm just making sure I don't look like an idiot." I told him, copying his actions.

"Well you are an idiot for thinking that you're the problem." Haechan retorted. "Why would there even be a problem?"
"I'm not the best at relationships." I stated, not looking at him.
"Well done Sherlock, no one here is exactly a veteran dater." He sassed. "You just make it up as you go."
"But I'm not used to actual relationships." I added. "What if I get bored?" Another scoff came from his direction.

"Do you get bored of going to bed and sleeping next to him?"
"Well... no."
"How about waking up to find him right by your side?"
"No."
"Making dinner with hi-"
"Okay I get it honey." I cut him off. "The whole, 'if you're not bored now then you wouldn't get bored later' crap."

"You're calling my advice crap?" He raised his eyebrows at me.
"It's only been a week. Relationships can last years." I mumbled back, watching the sky change colours as the sun set behind the tall trees.
"Okay then." He sighed. "Then just don't get bored, for his sake."
"What?"

"Stay with him. Keep him happy. You care about his feelings right?"
"Of course." I turned to face him.
"So don't get bored for him." He continued. "Don't let yourself succumb to it. Do it for him."
"Easier said than done." I huffed, glaring at him as he stood up off the van.
"Just try it." He replied, walking off and leaving me behind the van. "You'll probably find it much easier than you're expecting."

The next day we had decided to drive up to Gwangju city since we were nearby, and we were going to look for the apartment where my mother apparently lived. The city was busy - definitely something we weren't used to - but we managed to find our way to the apartment building. We parked the van, making sure to lock it since the area looked rough, then made our way inside the building.

It was up high - the 15th floor - but the building went up to 31, so it was only about halfway. The elevator took us up to the right floor, and I checked the piece of paper where I'd written the address down.
"Room 43." I told them, and they followed me down the long hall of doors, checking the number on each one.

We arrived at room 43, knocking on the door and waiting for a reply, but we didn't receive one. I decided to knock again, a little louder this time.
"The toilet's broken!" A female voice yelled from inside, causing us all to give each other confused glances.
"We don't need the toilet." I replied, some of the other guys taking a step back. We were in a foreign area, it was kinda scary. But I was determined to find my mum.

The door opened a crack, kept jarred by a small chain, and a woman around my height appeared through the ajar door.
"I don't want whatever you're selling." She scowled. "Go home kids."
"Are you Jeon Minji?" I asked her. "Can I-" I was cut off from my sentence.
"I don't want your fucking brownies."
The woman growled. "Go away." Her tone was much harsher than before. It took me aback, and a strong feeling of disappointment filled my heart.

"Areum, let's just go." Mark mumbled, slightly scared of the terrifying stare we were all receiving from the woman. "At least we tried." I took a deep breath, trying my best to hide my disappointment, and we set off down the hallway back to the elevator.
"W-wait." The woman called once our backs were turned. "I-is your name... Areum?"
"Y-yeah." I replied, turning back to face her and walking over. "Jeon Areum."

There was a long silence, no one knowing what to do. The door was slowly unlocked by the woman, and she stepped out into the hallway. She was the same height as me, her thin frame and pale skin littered with tattoos and her hair was bleached a harsh blonde colour. She stopped in the hallway, staring me down, but upon seeing me her face softened slightly.

"I can't believe it." She mumbled. "You look just like him... like me." No one knew what to do, so we all stood in silence, waiting for her to move. Her hand flew up to cover her mouth, restraining any cries from escaping, as tears began to well up in her eyes. Is this her? Have I found my mum?

"Is your name Jeon Minji?" I asked again, my heart racing with excitement as my breath hitched. I watched as her head nodded up and down rapidly, and at that moment my feet moved before I could think twice. I embraced her in a tight hug, squeezing as if I could never, ever let go.

I found her.