" ": You talking

' ': You thinking

* *: Narrator/Voice-off

3rd person POV:

Aigis: What a coincidence to run into you here, bro ! Could this be fate ?! We might ave pretty good compatibility with each other ! If Kazuma-chi ends up reborn as a beautiful girl, I might let you get inside me !

Kazuma: Who the hell is Kazuma-chi ? And don't just call me bro.

Aigis: Ojou-san, you probably can't make any breast milk yet, so just give some milk that's the same temperature as your body.

Nerimaki: Armour-san really sexually harasses everyone every night, don't you ?

Aigis: Sexual harassment is a demonstration of affection, Ojou-san. You want to stick your finger inside me ? It's quite warm, you know ?

Nerimaki: You know that Crimson Demons are the strongest, most combative group there is, right ? Picking a fight with them... You're really amazing. There really is a fine line between bravery and stupidity.

Kazuma: ... So, what are you doing here ? Didn't you get taken away by Eris ?

Aigis: Oh, yeah, listen to this, bro ! She's outrageous ! She tried to give me to a swordmaster Nii-chan ! And yet another intolerable pretty boy too ! He got mad when I teased the girls around him, so I ran away from home !

Kazuma: Well, I get that, but why did you come to the Crimson Demon Village of all places ?

Aigis: ... The Crimson Demon Village is surrounded by nothing but strong monsters. That's right, I gave him a trial ! One to determine if he truly is a man fit for me !

Kazuma: 'The chief's trial and now this one, why does everyone here like trials so much ?'

Nerimaki: Dear customer, didn't you say "Ah, the Crimson Demon Village is full of beauties just like I heard ! I'll stay here from now on !" the other day ?

Aigis: Now now, Ojou-san, don't say such things in a conversation between gentlemen. here's for the milk, keep the change.

Nerimaki: ... Are those fragments of some sort ?

Aigis: They are pieces of my shining body. I'm made of Orichalcum, after all. You can probably make enough to buy a castle by selling me.. You two are kind of scaring me here, so can you please stop looking at me like that ? Your face is too close, bro. Here's the body temperature milk that this Ojou-chan just brought me. It's my treat, so chug it down.

Kazuma: Why did you order it if you can't drink it ? Anyway, will you be staying here for a while ?

Aigis: Well, I'll probably go to an Eris Church to meet with my master again after I've had my fill of playing with the beautiful ladies here... Ojou-chan, haven't I already paid for my stay in advance ? Could you please stop scraping me ?

Kazuma: Well, it's great if you're staying for a while; the truth is, i'm here with the guy that caught you back then to help someone with the trial to become the chief of this village. I might need your help at some point, so can I count on you if that happens ?

Aigis: Oh, that guy is here too ? Well, I'll be free anyway, so I don't really mind, so long as he doesn't try to force me back to that swordmaster... But can you please stop this girl before she scrapes all of me away ?

Kazuma: ... Okay, I know I spent the night away, so I don't really have a say in that, but what happened here ?

"Seeing these two locked up, I have a good idea, but I was just told I needed to pick them up, so maybe they can explain."

Bukkoroli: Oh, it's good that you're here. Hurry up and take the two of them away.

"... One of you i'm not really surprised to see here..."

Megumin: Where did you disappear off to last night, Kazuma ? If you were here, we would've been able to avoid the Defense Corps with Enemy Detection and Lurk.

"You being here is one thing, but you... I really expected you to stop her."

Darkness: I have nothing to say...

Megumin: This will happen every day as long as I stay here, you know ? So it's best if everyone would just get used to it.

Bukkoroli: I have no idea what you're saying.

"Well, this problem child claims that she'll die if she doesn't cast Explosion every day. The town of Axel is now treating it like a natural occurrence of sorts."

Bukkoroli: I really don't get what you're talking about at all.

Megumin: Well, I guess it can't be helped. I'll try to finish it as early as possible from today onwards, so please inform the other villagers so that they won't be surprised.

"... ... Say, I don't suppose you could keep her here until we're done with the trial ? Just remember to take away her staff, and I can even pay you a fee if you want."

Bukkoroli: Please don't the Defense Corps isn't a daycare for problem children. Please properly do your job as a guardian...

Megumin: hey, would you please stop treating a tender young girl as a troublemaker ?!

"... I don't think you want to hear my honest opinion on that."

Yunyun: So it doesn't seem like we can take the chieftain's trial just yet. The grounds for the first trial have yet to be fully repaired...

Megumin: What do you mean the trial grounds aren't prepared yet ? I've only been away for a short while, but it seems like the villagers have really let themselves go since then.

"Don't act like you have nothing to do with that, you're the one who destroyed the grounds in the first place."

Yunyun: Um, actually, if Megumin could go somewhere else to play while the trial is going on...

Megumin: Hey, why don't you tell me exactly why you are treating me like an outcast ?!

Yunyun: N- No, i'm not treating you like an outcast... It's just, considering your personality, there's no way that you'll behave yourself during the trial... And if there's a place to show off at the end of the trial, there's no way you can restrain yourself, right ?

Everyone: Yeah, that makes sense.

Megumin: Don't just agree with her ! Do you guys think i'm some sort of feral beast or something ?!

"No, of course not. A beast can be trained to not destroy furniture, after all. And beasts are not thrown into jail cells either."

Megumin: ... ... ... ... ...

Aqua: Hurts, doesn't it ?

Kazuma: Still, that doesn't leave us with much to do. We already walked around the Crimson Demon Village the last time we were here, so what should we do now ?

Aqua: ... ... I want us to plant this girl in the forest.

"What did I tell you about that ? Don't try to decide for me, you."

Yunyun: Umm... As a Crimson Demon myself, it's a little troubling if you plant it close to the village... If possible, I think it's best to exterminate it...

Aqua: Can you really kill a girl this young ?! Was Yunyun always such a cold-hearted person ?! Come on, look her in the eye and say that again !

Yunyun: I'm sorry, i'm sorry, it's impossible, forgive me !

"Could you at least consult me before doing something like that ?!"

Aqua: Let's put her on that hill overlooking the village. She won't get lonely that way...

Yunyun: Aqua-san, that's the Hill of the Demon God. It's a popular spot for couples, so we can't put her here; How about placing her deeper in the forest ?

"How about you lot stop interfering with my experiment and mind your own damn business ?"

Kazuma: This is starting to be a chore; Why don't we just plant her in Yunyun's backyard ? The people who live here won't fall for the Tranquility girl's tricks, so why don't we just turn her into a new tourist attraction and be done with it ?

Aqua: As expected of Kazuma. She won't be lonely like this, and Yunyun will end up making a friend too. It really is perfect.

Yunyun: I think it's perfect too. I'll properly treasure her.

Megumin: What kind of stupid things are you saying ?! Yunyun too, don't agree so readily ! Making friends with monsters is the one line you shouldn't cross !

Yunyun: ... Say, Megumin, I thought of something that I'd do once I become the chief.

Megumin: W- Where did this come from... ? What do you have in mind ?

Yunyun: I've been thinking about this for some time. Is it possible to capture monsters that have high intelligence and are capable of communicating to create a monster ranch in the village...

Megumin: Isn't that the same as what Kazuma was thinking ?! Are you planning on turning them into experience points once they are grown up ?!

Yunyun: T- That isn't it ! If they are provided with food, clothing and shelter, I'm sure the intelligent monsters will have a change of heart ! This is the first step in finding a path of coexistence between mankind and monsters... !

"Thank you ! That's literally what i'm trying to do with her, trying to see if intelligent monsters can be reasoned with when in a controlled environment with no need to predate for food !"

Megumin: That just means you're as stupid ! What do you mean by coexistence ?! What a barefaced lie ?! Do you want friends so badly that you'll even turn monsters into NEETs ?!

Yunyun: of course I do ! Isn't that obvious ?!

"... ... Well at least you're being honest..."

Kazuma: ... You know, I really don't think there's any option other than to put her in the forest far away from the village...

Aqua: But she'd be lonely if we do that. Come to think of it, do Tranquility Girls have a gathering spot or something of the sort ? She wouldn't be lonely if we plant her next to others of her kind.

"To be fair, if there is a gathering spot for these in the wild, I'll immediately burn it to the ground."

Aqua: You fiend ! You'll scare this girl !

"Look, I still want to see that experiment to the end, but i'm willing to at least scout potential spots to leave her at if it proves to be a failure."

Mary: Hahahaha ! Hahaha !