May 31, 2021
Amanda's POV

"Dr. Amanda, you can go in now." The security guard at the Central Prison informed me, and I bowed to him before walking in through the heavy metal doors that he held open for me. My heart raced, and I clutched on tight to the straps of my shoulder bag as I slowly made my way to the lone seat within the small room.

As I got myself seated, the door at the other end of the room opened and my eyes lifted to the doorway to see Jungkook entering, his muscular body clad in a blue prisoner's uniform.

My heart wrenched seeing him this way.

Jungkook, the sweet and innocent boy whom I first met over nine years ago — the ebony-haired boy with a permanent bowl cut, round bambi eyes that always looked like he was scared of something, the shy boy with an aura of mystery surrounding him at all times, the adorable bunny smile that never once came up on his face unless he was goofing around with one of us. Above all, he was such a brilliant student with grades almost matching those of Taehyung, the basketball champion with a body that could put Greek Gods to shame, the skillful singer whose singing skills were mind-blowing, and he had never once openly or subtly tried to flirt with me or anyone else.

All the good memories of the happy days that we spent together flashed at high speed in the eyes of my mind, and I could feel my tears building up rapidly. Yet the bitter feeling that his wild emotions were silently lurking in the dark through all of it, hammered hard against my heart and made me feel sick.

Jungkook got himself seated on the chair facing me. My friend who was just there, sitting right across but separated from me by a glass wall, his innocent bambi eyes desperately in need of comfort.

"How have you been, Jungkook?" I mustered up the courage to talk first.

"I'm not okay, Amanda," he shook his head and let his head drop; his tears fell as did mine.

"Why are you crying, Jungkook? You hated him, right? Why are you crying now? Shouldn't you feel happy about how things are now?" I asked through my nonstop tears.

"I don't know what got into me, Mandy. I- you guys were the only people who were there in my life when all others hesitated and pushed me away at all times. I screwed up everything..." his voice cracked, and his shoulders shook.

I nodded slowly, trying in vain to stop my tears by drying them with my fingers.
"I hope you understand now that you really cannot control what other people feel and think, no matter how close they are to you. You and I were close friends, but Taehyung was always more than a friend to me, and you knew it too. That's what hurts me, Kook. You knew it all along, yet you had those kind of thoughts within your mind?" I sniffed on a few tissues and wiped my tears.

He sucked in a long breath and his voice grew deeper and more solemn.
"I know. I don't deserve anybody. I really don't deserve anyone. I know now why everyone always pushed me away. I wasn't ever worth anything." He wiped his tears with both his hands and his reddened eyes lifted to meet mine, his nose red and lips quivering.

I hated it that my words were making him feel inadequate but the fact remains that he brought it upon hismelf. I could never unsee the bubbly bunny smile on his happy face, and seeing him in a state like this was something I had never imagined even in my wildest nightmares. It shattered my heart, crushing and shredding it into pieces.

The boy who had lots of dreams and hidden talents which he never showed to the world because he was too shy and awkward, the boy who was always hanging out with us and cracking nerdy jokes, the boy who grew up to be the man he is today — what have you become, Jungkook?

"You had so many dreams to achieve..." I sniffed and leaned forward on the divider slab.

"I did... only you knew," he nodded, looking away, biting down on his lip and failing to hold back his nonstop tears.

"Don't hold it in. Cry it out, Kook. Let it all out. I wish I could hold you and let you know that it was a bad phase, but I cannot do it." I shook my head. "You tried to take away my happiness just because you had your own wild desires. And how can I ever forgive what you did to my husband?" My tone grew cold and distant.

Jungkook only stared at me, his lips and chin trembling and his words refusing to spill out of his mouth.

"I don't know how long you will be in here. But you have seven allegations against you including abduction, illegal over-usage of prescription drugs, medical malpractice and human rights violation. I'm guessing it could be a minimum of at least twelve years, and I will personally ensure that your medical license is cancelled and justice is served this time." I informed him in a stern tone, and he nodded regretfully, his tears endless.

"You know, with all your talents and abilities, you could have really outdone every other surgeon on the planet. But you chose to destroy it all. You chose to lose everything that you had while aiming for something that was never meant for you." I sighed. "Wrong choices, Jungkook. I hope you use this time in prison and work on yourself and reflect upon what you really can be in this life of yours."

His eyes lifted to meet mine, and I fixed my steady gaze on him for a few seconds.

"Do you know there's this saying 'Every saint has a past, and every sinner has a future?" I breathed out. "We're all sinners in some way or the other. We're all committing so many deadly sins every single day...but some sinners are just so extra, right?" I chuckled and pointed at him. "You're on the border now. Put your past behind and work on your future."

He smiled uneasily and nodded, combing his hair with his fingers and guilt overpowering his entire being as he struggled to look into my eyes.
"I will. I promise." Jungkook said softly.

I half-smiled back. "I really hope you do. I don't know if I'll ever see you some other time. So long, Kook!" I waved to him, got up from my seat and left without turning back to look at him, suppressing the numerous complex emotions within my heart.

My tears fell like a heavy downpour, and I kept wiping them away as I got into the car, settled my bag on the passenger seat and turned on the ignition when my phone buzzed with an incoming call from Jimin.

"Jimin?" I answered the call at once.

"Taehyung's B.P. is dropping," he informed me in a panicked voice, and I felt a knot constricting within my chest, my eyes wide and my hands trembling.

"I'll be there right away." I ended the call and drove straight to the hospital not caring about overspeeding, traffic signal violations or lane discipline. I drove crazily and as soon as I reached the hospital, I ran as fast as my legs could carry me to the CCU.

"Jimin...what happened?" I darted straight up to the CCU doors where he and Yoongi were waiting nervously, their faces pale and totally flushed, panic painted all over them.

I was still struggling to catch my breath.

"His B.P. dropped suddenly, and he developed violent seizures. They've given him I.V. Diazepam." Yoongi informed and wrapped his arms around my shoulders.

I gasped.
"Oh my God. This is bad. His vitals were all stable until I left." I cried out in panic, and Jimin enveloped me in a warm hug.

"Shh... it'll be okay.. he'll be okay. Amanda, you do know that seizures are a common side effect of beta-blockers over dosage. Until his system gets rid of most of it, and the vasculature is regularized, this is going to be quite common." He stroked my back gently while stating the facts.

"I'm so worried that I might lose him..." I cried harder on his chest, and he held me tighter among his own tears, trying his best to comfort me and be there for me, and just then the Neurologist came out from the CCU, causing us to stand upright and look at her with eager eyes, desperately waiting to hear that Taehyung was doing okay.

The doctor spoke with a dire sigh.
"Dr. Kim's B.P. is still low, but the seizures are arrested. It could have gotten worse, but, luckily, Diazepam worked. We need to monitor him more closely. And given that there's mild spinal damage, we still need to wait for him to regain consciousness to check his limb sensitivity and functionalities." She let out a deep breath. "Let's hope for the best." She nodded with a tight-lipped smile and returned to the CCU.

Completely drained of all my energy, I slumped down on one of the waiting chairs along the corridor, burying my face in my hands. The guys sat by helplessly, yet morally supporting me, watching me cry it all out, crying along with me while hoping the best for Taehyung.

June 24, 2021

As I walked across the hospital reception area, I glanced at the breaking news that was scrolling past on the screen of the large wall-mounted television in the waiting lobby.

'Dr. Kim Namjoon of the Kim Laboratories has been arrested under charges of illegal contracts signed with the Jung-gu Namsan-won orphanage that involved illegal black market org-' the news kept scrolling, and I walked past the lobby and into the elevator, internally smiling victoriously.

Pressing the button for the 8th level, I closed my eyes briefly and took a few deep breaths, letting every muscle in my body relax. The elevator dinged and the doors opened at the 8th level, and with a few quick steps I arrived at the room.

Pushing open the door with a lot of enthusiasm and excitement, I walked straight in with a wide smile on my face — one that almost matched the big square smile on my husband's face.

"Hey, ramen! Morning!" Taehyung tore his gaze from the TV and greeted me. He was sitting propped up against the headboard with a few pillows supporting his back and his legs stretched out in front of him while popping a grape into his mouth.

"Morning, Mandy!" Hoseok, who was seated right next to the bed, greeted me, removing his eyes from the flask of milk in his hands.

"Morning, Hoseok! Morning, honey!" I went closer to the bed and kissed Taehyung's forehead, softly brushing aside the bangs covering his face.

"I just saw the flash news," Taehyung beamed happily and pointed to the TV.

I nodded with a smile.
"Yeah, I saw it too, in the lobby."

Hoseok handed the glass of milk to Taehyung and said,
"Good that you reported it, Amanda. And if he had not already been dismissed from this hospital, it would've been total chaos here today."

We both nodded in agreement.

Taehyung hummed softly.
"That's true. And Hana?" He turned to look at me.

"She would probably be seducing Yoongi at Jeju-do," I giggled. "So, are you ready to leave, baby?" I asked Taehyung who was more than excited to leave the hospital today after spending more than a month here during various stages of his recovery, some worse than the others, and some almost sending him to the gates of Heaven.

"Yeah, I am more than ready." He smiled excitedly.

Taehyung had been in coma for over two weeks, and he has significant permanent spinal cord damage that has caused a reduced sensitivity on the entire left side of his body including his limbs, torso and face. Yet, it is such a low price to pay compared to his precious life that was almost lost in the battle we were fighting.

He can still walk steadily on his own and luckily the damage isn't progressive since it was drug-induced. So we would have to live with the same level of reduced sensitivity for the rest of our lives.

It would still take a while more until Taehyung could resume driving, strictly under the presence of a second person and never on his own. And given that his dominant hand is his right, he has been given the green signal to start performing surgeries whenever he feels he's ready for it.

After helping Taehyung shave his two-day old stubble and change into some of his own clothes and after signing out all the checks and insurance formalities, Hoseok and I loaded the bags into the trunk of our car and Taehyung seated himself in the passenger seat, struggling a bit with the buckle of the seatbelt. I helped him out with it and bid goodbye to Hoseok before taking on the wheels.

Upon arriving at our home, I unloaded the bags before helping Taehyung out. I had stayed home a day and cleaned up the place for his arrival. Once inside, he headed straight to the fish bowl by the window.

"Hey, Mac and Cheese!" He gently tapped the bowl with his fingertips. "Did you both miss me?" He asked them with a cute pout.

"They did... the entire house did." I announced as I locked the door and walked up to him.

Taehyung fell back, letting his weight sink into the soft couch, and I sat down close to him, wrapping my arms around his torso.

"I missed you so much, Taehyung" I nestled closer to him, burying my face in his chest and curling up close, feeling the warmth that had been missing in my life, the warmth that I had grown to live with, inhaling in his scent that felt like home.

"I missed you too much, ramen. I love you a lot..." he gently lifted my chin up and kissed my forehead.

"Call me that again," I asked and wrapped my arms tighter around him.

Taehyung chuckled.
"Ramen, silly ramen..." he bopped my nose.

"Again... I missed hearing it so much," I giggled.

"Sexy ramen" he winked and stroked my jaw and I craned my neck capturing Taehyung's lips in mine, his lips moving painfully slowly against mine, our tongues tangling delicately as we both let out low moans, skin bristling and hands impatient against each other's body.

Parting for breath, I pecked his lips a few times.
"Happy wedding anniversary, Dr. Kim!" I looked into his eyes and said softly.

Taehyung whispered in his deep, raspy voice,
"Happy wedding anniversary, Mrs. Kim... where's my anniversary present?" He pecked my lips and pouted, our foreheads resting against each other's, eyes fixed on each other's lips.

"Umm... you want to see it?" I leaned back and sat upright.

"Of course, I do." He smiled his big square smile, his eyes morphing into cute crescents and gleaming with eagerness.

I slowly undid the top three buttons of my shirt.

"Aaaahhh... I missed this so much." He licked his lips and turned his body to sit facing me.

I moved aside the fabric of my shirt slightly, just enough to reveal my left breast, my eyes never leaving his alluring ones all the while.

His eyes widened, and his jaw dropped when he saw his present, as he brought his right hand to my body and slowly ran his fingers over the ink on my chest.

"You really got it done?" Taehyung's voice cracked and his eyes glistened as he inched forward, breathing heavily.

I nodded and smiled through my own tears that were clouding my vision.
"Yeah, baby. I did. Remember when I told you that a tattoo has to be significant and also hold a lot of meaning to the owner? To me, nothing in this world means more than you... so Kim Taehyung it is," I traced my fingers over the tattoo on my chest. "You mean the world to me, horny bear. I love you so much!" I wrapped my fingers around his fingers that stayed on my chest.

"But you said there's nothing in a name," he mocked me and closed in on the gap between us.

"Ahhh my bad, but your face is just too perfect for the tattoo artist to replicate it..." I whispered as we came closer to each other, my heart pounding wildly, as though it was our first time being so close to one another.

His right hand trailed up to my neck and with a soft pull, my lips crashed on his lips, and our eyes closed to completely take in the pleasurable sensation. Taehyung's lips moved gently against mine, taking his time to taste them to his heart's desire as his hand slid to the back of my neck, firmly pulling me closer to him.

"Did it hurt much?" He mumbled against my lips as I threaded my fingers through his other hand.

"Do you want to kiss it better?" I pecked his lips a few times, resting my forehead on his forehead as his hands slowly undid the rest of the buttons on my shirt, and our lips melted into a more intense kiss, making me feel at home, in the arms of the only man I ever loved.

Aaahhh... finally... we're at the end of this book.

Hold your breath for the epilogue that's coming up next.

Happy pill ☝
Published on : 10/29/2021