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episode five | small steps
episode four

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For a barmaid, who is usually the one serving drinks, Neave can't help but shot the burning liquid as it comes. She's exhausted; they hadn't slept yet since traveling through the Fold overnight and then walking to the local town of Kribirsk. Neave's feet ache that matched her heart.

But they were in East Ravka, where Neave had been born.

Yet, she didn't feel like celebrating when Annette Ninomae was dead. It felt like an anchor inside herself, where she felt like she was sinking with the only thing keeping her going was the thought of finding out her mother's story. Whether Neave had anyone left, she wasn't sure, but the ghosts were starting to surround her.

The feeling of that left her shaking as she longed for another shot, but knew she needed to keep a sharp mind with Kaz watching her closely. Instead of another drink, Neave took a roll that Inej was eating with the belief that the dough would soak up the alcohol and ease her growling stomach.

"So..." Jesper summed up, clutching his drink. "That went well."

Neave flinched at the words, knowing that was far from the case. Screams filled her ears once more, along with the screeching from the Volcra and the almost exposure of Neave's hidden talent. It was a complete disaster, but somehow they had survived, and that seemed as much as a miracle as the Sun Summoner.

"Never again," Neave vowed.

"Alright for some," Jesper said, shooting her a look, where Neave still planned on not returning to Ketterdam. But... she wasn't sure, yet. Ketterdam offered her the protection of fleeing wherever, but here there was nothing keeping her to stay so far and it felt far more dangerous.

"The Little Palace winter fete," the Conductor was already focused on the next part, untrusting that Kaz had a way for them to get inside. "There's just no way he can find a way to the Sun Summoner without Nina," then he picked up the leaflet. "Especially during this ridiculous party. The place will be crawling with Second Army."

"We're in luck," Kaz announced, finally joining them. "There's a good chance we can crack on. Now that we're three days' travel from the capital, the next play is finding a way inside the Little Palace. It turns out the Kribirsk archives house the Little Palace blueprints."

"How convenient," Neave interrupted, struggling to contain her smile at what was about to come.

"But," Kaz shot her a look. "They're kept under lock and key. Far from the prying eyes of the masses."

Jesper banged the table and then fisted his hand in celebration. "Yes!"

"What does that mean?" The Conductor questioned.

"Time for a heist," Jesper patted his back, grinning.

Inej carried on eating with Neave sharing Jesper's enthusiasm. Finally, something interesting was happening. Crossing the Fold had crossed the line of interesting, but this was the right kind of thrill that lacked in Neave's life.

But with that, it meant that Milo the goat — Jesper had named him — had to leave the team with him being too innocent to be dragged any further into their corrupt lives. The bow was still in place around Milo's neck, a token that Neave would leave with him with the promise that he would always look adorable.

"Let's promise never to forget each other, Milo," said Jesper, stroking the goat. "But I must go now. I leave you in the care of this lovely barmaid, who needs your support here."

Milo let out a little sound in reply.

Neave couldn't help but exchange a look with the barmaid, knowing that with a role like that, they were always exposed to the strange wonders of the world. Perhaps this was a normal day for the Kribirsk barmaid as it certainly was for Neave.

"Goodbye, Milo," Neave stroked the goat as Jesper left.

Then he was gone with Neave left with the Conductor and Kaz, knowing that her role in the heist was to stick with Kaz at all times. Maybe Neave needed to work on getting Kaz to trust her since that was the main problem, but Kaz Brekker didn't trust anyone.

"I have a job for you," Kaz announced to the Conductor. "We need to hitch a ride east to the Little Palace."

The Conductor hummed in agreement.

Kaz held up notes. "Make friends."

"But that's the hardest job," the Conductor complained.

Then, Kaz moved to leave with a gesture for Neave to follow.

"You managed to win us over, didn't you?"

Neave pressed her lips together, knowing that wasn't the case at all but the Conductor couldn't see her face. If what the crows were doing didn't sound so interesting, then Neave would be up for the job of making friends as she happened to be rather good at getting people to like her. That could be one way to gain Kaz's trust, even if it sacrificed the fun.

"I could find us a ride," Neave mentioned, offering a sweet smile. "Everyone likes me."

"Neave," said Kaz, looking at her from the side as she left the bar. "We're in East Ravka, letting you out of my sight gives you a reason to run. You will stick with me."

Sighing, Neave hoped she looked innocent. "What can I do to make you trust me? I have nowhere else to go, Kaz."

"You have the same destination as us to get to," he reminded her, and then paused, staring at Neave with a quizzical look. "If you want my trust, then tell me the truth. Your reaction in the Fold wasn't just fear, Neave."

Neave swallowed, hating how nothing ever missed him. Marian appeared in her mind once more, reminding Neave that if anyone came close to the truth, then they must die and anyone around them. But... there had to be another way? Thinking, she couldn't figure out what to do. She could flirt with Kaz, but he wasn't foolish nor was he interested. Kaz Brekker truly left Neave lost.

One thing Kaz valued, though, was a payment from a job.

"Some truths are better left as secrets," Neave said, not breaking the lock of their gazes. "The truth will hinder the job, Kaz. Am I worth risking that?"

He paused at that, debating his options. If they were discovered and captured, then the truth leaking into the crows would lead to exposure of Neave. Of course, if she was captured then she would be dead before they could even consider torturing her.

"When we succeed, you will tell me," Kaz ordered.

Neave nodded, knowing now that by then she would be long gone, whether it be alone or with any extended family that had survived after all these years.

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"Oh, Kaz, look at you!" Neave couldn't stop teasing Kaz since he had shared what the two would be doing on their end of the heist. Step one included Kaz wearing a ridiculous costume that fitted an artist's aesthetic. The hat was adorable (something Neave planned on stealing after), along with the scarf that she now leaned forward to adjust. "Adorable, Dirtyhands."

Neave didn't miss him recoil as her fingers came close to his neck that caused her smile to fall. "Sorry," Neave apologised. "It looked a little crooked."

"Do you remember your role?" Kaz demanded.

"Yes, yes," Neave waved a hand, saddened that her role wasn't anything as fancy as Inej, but then again, there couldn't be anyone else fitted for the role more than Inej. "I'm nothing more than your lovely assistant."

Neave held up the small bound notebook that was her chosen prop for the role. All Kaz wanted her to do was to stay silent, though.

Satisfied, Kaz was first to leave the carriage with Neave following silently behind. Her hair had been redone from the chaotic mess to a delicate ponytail with a ribbon that would have been matching with Milo. Then she wore a coat over her stained dress, trying to hide the fact that she had been traveling without the chance of stopping to wash it. Fortunately, Kaz had given her five minutes to wash before they did their part.

Neave now had to hide her surprise at seeing the inside of the achieves building. The architecture was nothing she had seen before — something that would belong more on the richer side of Ketterdam, where the university sat.

"Good day to you, sir," Kaz greeted the man, acting the opposite from himself with an attempt of a friendly grin as he caught his cane in one hand. "My name is Ivanovski. The sculptor, yes."

"All right," the man didn't look impressed and then his eyes flickered to Neave. "And you?"

"Anya," she introduced herself with a dazzling smile. "Ivanovski's assistant. It's lovely to meet you."

"I am in desperate need of your assistance," said Kaz, receiving the man's attention again. "I am working on a real showstopper for the winter fete." There was a pause, to which the man adjusted his glasses, clearly fed up with the sculptor and any mention of the fete. "I need the dimensions to the Little Palace entrances. The grand piece may be too grand to fit through the doorframe. The King will have my head if his statuary must be parked in the courtyard."

"Damned fete." The man shook his head before moving to leave his station with the countertop coming up. "I have to pull the blueprints every day."

"Oh, no," Neave sympathised. "We're so sorry to be a burden, but we truly appreciate the help. Thank you so much."

With that, she managed to capture a hint of a smile from him. "It's not a problem, Miss," said the man. "Wait here."

Neave kept her smile as he walked past them. Next to her, Kaz dropped the phosphorous with his cane providing enough force for it to slide under the man's foot. Their part was complete as a trail would now be left for Inej to follow later on come to the second part.

"Maybe I should have given you the job in finding us a way to the Little Palace," admitted Kaz while they waited. "People do like you."

"With a little smile and kind words, people might like you too, Kaz," said Neave.

His lips twitched as if amused. "I don't need people to like me."

Neave felt the urge to roll her eyes as she shook her head. Then again, fear worked best for Kaz as it had helped build his reputation in Ketterdam that led to the name Dirtyhands. Maybe, in her own way, Neave was similar to him but in the completely opposite way too, through using kindness and a sense of innocence to sway how people perceived her. Kaz wanted to be seen as fearsome; Neave a sweet innocent. Ironically, out of the two, perhaps Neave would be feared more if the world knew what she could potentially do.

"Dimensions to the entrances of the Little Palace," said the archivist upon returning, having found the two patiently waiting.

"Ah!" Kaz offered a smile, praising him with a religious cross. "May the Sun Summoner bless you."

"Oh, I'm not a believer," the man told the two.

"No, truth be told," Kaz looked around as if worried someone might overhear him. "Neither am I."

"Either way, thank you so much!" Neave added before the two left.

Outside, Neave shot Kaz a ridiculous look as the two climbed back into the carriage to leave with their part officially complete. Seeing her gaze, Kaz frowned.

"What?" Kaz demanded.

"I just don't understand," said Neave, finding the whole situation amusing. "You don't believe in the Sun Summoner, but the job surrounds her."

Neave didn't want to use the word kidnap out loud: you never knew who was listening nor did she feel quite right about having a hand in stealing a living person.

"I'm being paid to kidnap Alina Starkov," said Kaz, quietly. "That is all."

"If you say so," replied Neave.

Did she believe in the Sun Summoner? Neave wasn't too sure. The myth surrounding the Sun Summoner had turned Alina into a Saint before the world had even got a glimpse of her power. Perhaps stories had twisted the truth with the Sun Summoner being nothing more than another Grisha. But, there had to be something otherwise why would the Little Palace go through all the trouble of announcing someone with a power who could tear down the Fold, if Alina could not do it?

But those questions will be answered once they arrived at the Little Palace, whether it be through seeing the Sun Summoner with their own eyes or through asking Alina themselves.

Step two of the plan came two hours after sunset with Jesper heading inside the archives building, blending in with the guards that protected the building. In disguise, Jesper was to dim the lights, surrounding the building in darkness for Inej to work in. The darkness came with the trail of phosphorous that would lead Inej to where the blueprints rested. Then, once Inej had found the blueprints, she would make a copy to prevent any suspicion.

"Neave," said Kaz before they departed. "I will remain disguised in case anything goes wrong, but can I count on you to wait outside for us?"

Was that Kaz trying to trust her?

"You want to leave her alone in the dark?" Jesper questioned.

"I can handle myself, Jesper," Neave told him, struggling to hide her smile. "Inej is not the only one who knows how to use a knife."

"There's still a few tips and tricks I could show you," Inej mentioned, shooting Neave a look, to which Neave brightened, liking the thought of that. Neave now had three knives thanks to Inej, so her collection was slowly growing.

"My concern is not your safety," Kaz cut in, catching her gaze as he studied her. At least he believed that she could handle herself if trouble arose. "My concern is you leaving."

"Why would you leave?" Jesper asked. "Didn't you want to go to the Little Palace?"

Neave looked away, not wanting anyone to see the gleam of tears.

"Jesper," said Inej. "Leave it."

"My birth mother died in the Fold," Neave told Jesper, refusing to see his sympathetic face.

"Neave..." Jesper started.

"If this is going to work, then you have to trust me, Kaz," said Neave, sticking her head up high as she glared at her boss. "I have nowhere to run nor do I want to. The Little Palace still holds answers for me if not a family, so I am with you all the way."

There was silence as Kaz debated his options. Too many disguised guards would result in the possibility of being discovered but they did not trust Neave enough to have a larger role within the heist. Leaving her outside was their best option.

"You will wait outside," Kaz told her, deciding to trust her for once. "But you will stay hidden. Understood?"

"Yes, Boss," Neave promised.

Then they were off with Neave forced to stick to the shadows as she waited. At least Kaz hadn't sent her back to the Conductor, but she didn't know if that was a good thing or not. He was trusting her, but still keeping her close by. It was a start at least and maybe in time, he would forget about Neave's secrets (she doubted it, but she could still hope).

Watching the building, Neave's breathing hitched to see that the lighting valves had been switched off. Somewhere up there, Inej was working her magic with it being too dark for Neave to see properly. The second part had started and all Neave could do was watch, silently praying that it was successful. Knowing the crows, it would be.

"You were born to be a shadow, Neave," Marian appeared in her mind once again. "Staying hidden is how you survive. The outside world is too dangerous for a girl like you."

Neave frowned, balling her fists at the reminder of what had happened when those words were spoken. The local kids her age had been having a get-together with a festival taking place, but Marian had forbidden Neave from going. Instead of joining those her age, Neave had been stuck on the farm, blindfolded and locked up, taunted until she found a way to free herself. It had been a reminder of what would happen if Neave went searching for trouble.

Now, here she was, on the outskirts of trouble but still somehow in the middle of it all.

The lights switching back on now alerted Neave as her heart flickered, concerned for the three inside. If the lights were on, then Inej couldn't leave the way she had come in. What were they going to do now?

A clock chimed, the sound echoing as Neave waited, finding every minute that passed was tedious. Then, finally, she saw the three emerging from the archives building. Neave couldn't help but think that only the crows could walk out of a heavily guarded building like that and get away with it. The smile on her face glowed, admiring them.

"All good? Did you get it?" Neave questioned, eyeing the three.

"Of course we got it," answered Jesper. "It's nice to see you're still here."

"I did say I wasn't going anywhere," Neave reminded them, eyes flickering to Kaz with her eyebrows raising. "Maybe next time I can be of more use."

Inej studied Neave with a small smile.

However, it was Kaz that spoke: "we'll see."

Small steps, Neave reminded herself.

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I hope you enjoyed the chapter! I'm so excited to get to the Little Palace!