FIVE MONTHS LATER

Nora would recoil in surprise everytime the lukewarm sea water slithered and kissed her feet, followed by her occasional glances at the same to check if it was not a fish instead who had mistakenly scaled its way up to the shore and caught her unawares. Although quite a couple of minutes had passed for her as her own company kept her engaged, she wondered if she would ever get accustomed to dipping her toes in the water and not be startled by every little trick that it played on her.

A fragrant zephyr blew through her hair in the meanwhile, carrying the scent of spring with itself. Her nostrils flared when through it, she could determine the distance from herself at which periwinkles and sea lavenders must be blooming merrily— her mind picturing them swaying in the mild wind. The sun that shone above her was not too bright either, the comfort it delivered with the help of its tepid rays causing Nora to feel as if she had never stepped out of her home, and was simply straddled in some corner of it.

A tiny smile fluttered on her lips, soon stretching into an exquisite grin when her phone chimed and compelled her to skim over the notification that it had left for her. However, before she could type back to the sender of that message, a voice called her name, excitement lacing it all over.

"Doc, you made it!" Nora responded with an equal amount of sincerity, her eyes crinkling to show her pleasure when Namjoon finally got seated beside her on the sand.

"Of course, I was the one who had asked to meet in the first place. Wouldn't it be extremely... Youngmi of me to stand you up despite so?" Namjoon chuckled, "How have you been, by the way? I didn't really hear from you in these past few months."

"I've been great— Well, not truly but it is what it is, right?" Nora answered, her expression turning sombre for reasons that Namjoon could not unravel at once. "I bear a news, though. Don't know if it's good or bad. Whatever, I'm just gonna let you decide."

"I don't like that tone of yours. Whenever you speak that way it's usually because something horrible has taken place. Is it so this time as well?" Namjoon quizzed in incertitude, a small pout forming on his lips.

"It'll never not amaze me how you're always spot on with your speculations." Nora snickered, a morose cast soon eclipsing the amusement. "It's about Ewan. Some of the inmates teamed up against him and ended up beating him to death. We'll look into it for sure, but from the get-go, it hasn't really appeared to be more than a case of bullying to me. I can always be wrong, though."

Namjoon stayed silent for a while, allowing the rustling of the sea breeze to fill in the gaps that were surfacing in their conversation. "That's sad to hear." He commented matter-of-factly.

"Tell me about it. I mean, even though he was an awful person, he was still a person. A person who could've shown improvement once given the proper chance to. Promise me that you won't judge if I confide in you?" Nora's soft gaze bore into Namjoon's, providing him relief with a probable change of topic along with the balmy water that sloshed against his bare feet.

"Of course, Lieutenant! That's a given." He beamed, instilling a sense of reassurance in Nora's nerves.

"I'm a strong believer of you can always turn your life around. And to know that Ewan was deprived of it breaks my heart a little. If we were to study his case without harboring any prejudice against him, don't you think that he didn't truly receive the chance to redeem himself? Now obviously, I'm not a fan of him. I disliked him as much as y'all. But I can't refrain from mulling over this fact too."

"I can't stop but be curious about him, that had he been granted a few more days in this world, would he have opted to remain the jerk that he was, or realized that he had indeed been one all along and therefore worked on himself? It'll always be a mystery to me, Doc." Nora finished, straying her vision towards the seagulls that were flapping their wings at a distance.

"He could've pulled back from his destructive activities and put his revenge-seeking agenda on hold literally any day in these nine long years, Miss Son, but he chose not to. One needs to introspect every once in a while in order to locate themselves on the map of how far they've wandered off from being able to be called a human, and that man evidently lacked that quality."

"I guess it takes one to be a god to possess that ability, then." Nora chortled, her facial muscles flexing in congruence.

"Not exactly. Just because we're on the seemingly right path, doesn't mean that we're gods. We're humans only, so are those who go astray sometimes. But at the end of the day, it all boils down to whether they could come round and notice that they did, and eventually dig a new route from thereon." Namjoon glimpsed at Nora, who had supposedly— from the looks of it— drowned in his esoteric interpretation of the situation.

"We're not humans if we don't make mistakes, but what ultimately draws the line is if we were ready to learn something out of them. External factors do aid in recognizing the manner in which we've wronged the people around us, that's why correction facilities exist in the first place. But after some time, if we can't make a steady progress, I don't think we can afford to rely on them anymore. We become more or less a goner then."

"If the flame inside you to be a better version of your past self— without coming to detest it for infinite reasons— is snuffed out, no force in this world will be able to stir you into doing so. Ewan Choi— peace to the departed soul— simply belonged to that category. There's no point in overthinking all this." Namjoon passed an accommodating smile, causing Nora to reciprocate his gesture.

"I think you're right." She said, her voice barely above a whisper. "Also, karma is real, bitches."

Nora's face warped in regret, musing if she happened to go overboard with that remark. However, when Namjoon rumbled with a string of chuckles that further developed into a wholehearted laugh, all the knots in her heart came undone. The grin that now sprawled across his entire face somehow wound up fetching all the happiness in the world for Nora. As her lips tugged at the corners— a content simper manifesting thereafter— she directed her line of sight towards the Sun that was already half-submerged into the sea, watching streaks of red gradually dissipate into the oncoming murk of night.

"So what have you been up to these days? You haven't enlightened me yet." Namjoon spoke with an impish air.

"Same old, same old. What about you though, Doc? How are things going with Doctor Shin? Is she doing any better now?" Nora queried, her eyes squinting as she struggled to maintain her focus on Namjoon in the dim light that the faraway streetlamps were now bequeathing to them.

"Profession-wise, she's as excellent as ever. In fact, we've opened a combined dentistry complex, so I don't remain a hospital slave anymore. The venture is satisfactory. It all feels like a lucid dream, if I were to be truthful. About her mental health, she's making progress day by day. It may seem unnoticeable at first glance but the fact that she's trying her best, is already enough for me. No cap." Namjoon bobbed his head in an obvious manner, pursing his lips in contemplation.

"She's seen a lot in such a young age. Her friend being left with no resort but to take his own life due to her still haunts her to this day. She thinks that because she spoke when she was in no place to do so, what she reckoned was right at that point in time must have been invalid after all. That's why she avoids speaking her mind till this day. Even if she's hurting on the inside, she won't go ahead and share that with somebody. Because that incident has unfortunately taught her that acknowledging your inner voice isn't as meaningful as is portrayed everywhere. It's a fallacy, a myth, and nothing more than that."

"Then Ewan happened, and distorted furthermore her perception of things that are actually very straightforward. It's beyond question that it's gonna take her a while before she'd be able to trust someone once again, to love someone once again. But I don't really mind to be honest, she can keep me waiting for as long as she wants, because I won't leave her side. I know her inside out— how gem of a person she's beneath all those layers of dirt and grit accumulated over this long stretch of time. She just requires polishing, that's all. And I'm willing to be that person for her."

"That's the kind of love I want her to learn, that it still prevails among us humans." Namjoon completed, tossing a pensive glance Nora's way.

"That's amazing, Doc. I hope she realizes that soon so that you don't have to wait anymore." Nora responded as she gazed fondly into Namjoon's bright eyes, a feeling of being gravitated towards them invading her senses. "You deserve much more than that."

"So do you." Namjoon looked away, diffidence overwhelming him. "Ah, I just remembered! Why don't you join us for dinner sometime?"

"That was a bolt from the blue, not gonna lie." Nora peeped at him from the corner of her eye in displeasure. "And I'd love to! I'll come for sure, that is if my job permits me."

"My intuition says that you're gonna ditch us— Oh, I'm sorry." Namjoon abruptly cut himself off mid-sentence when his phone warbled in his pocket, picking it up soon after Nora had accepted his apology.

After a few successive yes, okay and I see's, he hung up, looking briefly at Nora before divulging, "That was senior. And I really hate to say it but I urgently gotta head to hers, like, right now. She needs some help, she says. I hope I'll see you around, though? I really want to. Let's stay in touch if that's alright with you?"

"What the hell, Doc? Certainly we'll be in touch. Now rush back to the queen of your heart before another Ewan pops into the scenario." Nora snorted roguishly, earning a feigned glower from the man.

"Take care, Lieutenant." Namjoon smiled radiantly, stealing the thunder of the stars that were dotted all across the night dome. Nora merely nodded, an authentic grin pasted on her lips too, watching his figure as it gradually reduced to a speck— proof that he was attempting at sprinting through the way to Youngmi's.

After vacantly staring in the same direction for a while, Nora shifted on the grainy sand, adjusting herself. The Moon was right in front her now, as it projected a silvery glow to ripple along with the sea waves. Alternating her regard and carefully assigning it to the source of illumination as well as its reflection, a maudlin smile subsequently came to adorn her features.

"I'm still not over him," she whispered, eyes gleaming behind a wall of tears.

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a/n

scroll down once more! PLS PLS PLS PLS. i've written a long ass thank you note for my dearest readers, and i'll be sad-sad if no one responds to my ceaseless love for them :(( reminding y'all again for a vote and comment on this chapter hehehe. old habits die hard 😭