The Christmas lights lining main street slowly went off one by one. Most shops were all locked up for the holiday, except one small antiques store on the corner. The lamp of the greeter's desk still burned on while Chris continued to write away in his sales log for the day. He sighed, frustrated with the numbers he was seeing. Though the season brought many shoppers, tonight had been one of their worst nights in a very long time.

"I'm taking off." Ashley spoke as she pulled on her faux fur coat.

"Alright," He mumbled, "I'll see you tomorrow."

"Tomorrow?" She asked, confused and concerned, "Chris, it's Christmas tomorrow."

"And?"

She walked in front of his desk, a hand on her hip, "And I want to spend it with my family. Don't you want to spend it with Devin?"

"It's just another day, Ash. A day we could be working." He replied.

"No one's going to come in the shop. You'll end up losing money from keeping the lights on. Look, I know you don't like the holidays anymore, but don't stop the rest of us from enjoying them. It's not our fault, what happened. Don't punish us for it."

Chris propped his elbow up on the desktop, pressing his fingers into his temple. Closing his eyes, he sighed, "Fine. You can have tomorrow off."

Ashley reached across his desk and set her hand on his shoulder, "Do me a favor and stay home. Enjoy some time with Devin. Okay?"

He forced a smile and decided it was in his best interest to just agree. She was wasting his time by talking. Truthfully, he did want to get home. Not for Devin's sake. More so, he wanted a shower and to go to bed. He was a workaholic and couldn't actually sleep until he wishes his load for the day.

"Okay." He spoke with a slightly annoyed tone.

She forced a smile and turned for the door, "Merry Christmas, Chris." Ashley turned her head to the side to look down one of the isles behind him, "Merry Christmas, Jeremy!"

He was in the midst of stacking some books. Jeremy glanced around the stack in his hand, replying, "Merry Christmas! Have a good night! Drive safe!"

"You too." She gently grinned. As she pushed the door open, the shop bell ringing, she softly waved at Chris.

He was unaffected by her attempts to soften his heart. His phone buzzed repetitively from his dearest husband begging him to come home already. He simply muted it and continued his work for another half an hour. Chris closed the book, putting it in the top drawer of his desk. He grabbed his coat and told Jeremy to close up.

Somehow, the young boy managed to keep himself happy. The fact that Ashley was able to talk his boss into giving him Christmas off contributed to that. He was beyond happy to spend the holiday with his girlfriend, even if it'd be in a shitty apartment with a Charlie Brown style tree. Jeremy finished taking inventory and sang to himself while doing so.

The harsh winds rushed Chris' face as he walked out onto the street. He threw his scarf over his mouth, continuing to his car. Truthfully, he dreaded how his spouse was going to yell at him for being gone all day. He could just hear it now. Devin wasn't going to let go of the fact that he had to spend Christmas Eve with just himself and the cats.

Chris turned on the radio to try to take his mind off things. He turned it off just as quickly when he realized it was all cheesy Christmas songs. His drive home was in utter silence. It gave him time to think about the previous holidays. They'd been just as miserable the past few years. For him, there was no making it happy. Others can see it as a celebration, but to him, it was just a cruel reminder of what he'd lost.

As he walked in the door of his Victorian apartment, Devin bitched at him, "Where have you been?!"

He really didn't want a fight on Christmas. With a huff, he told him, "I was at work. I had to update the books."

"Chris! That could've waited! You can do the books any day of the year. Christmas Eve only happens once a year. Don't you understand that? Hey! Don't you walk away from me!" He followed his husband through the hall as he was attempting to escape this conversation.

Chris turned around abruptly, "Devin, I'm not in the mood for this."

"Too fucking bad! It's your own fault you're so goddamn heartless." Devin grabbed his wrist as he tried to walk away again, "You know! Anyone else that lost their whole family would start being a better person, not worse!"

He yanked his hand away, "You don't want to go there with me."

"Oh, what? You're too damn scared to admit the truth? It's been four fucking years and you're still in denial that it's your goddamn fault! It should've been you! If I would've known you'd turn out this way, I would've wished it was you."

Chris raised his hand, slapping him across the face hard. Devin stumbled back into the wall and put his fingertips to the red spot on his cheek. It wasn't the first time in the past few years that he'd hurt him. That still didn't make it any easier. Hurt was obvious on his painted face. He did truly look beautiful in a red dress with matching gothic makeup. Devin didn't deserve what his best friend and partner had become.

"Don't you ever speak like that!" He seethed, "Don't you think I wish I could've changed what happened? I'd give anything to go back, to... To tell my angel I love him," He closed his eyes in a sigh. Chris reopened them, looking over at the photo on the wall, "To tell them not to go out in that storm. It wasn't worth it." He turned his back and attempted for the third time to finally head into the bedroom for a shower.

"Chris," Devin muttered, getting him to glance over his shoulder at him, "You can sleep alone tonight. I'm going to Vinny's parents for the night."

"Fine. See if I care." He grumbled, "You know what? Why don't you just fucking stay with Vinny. Go see if he'd tolerate your shit as much as I do."

He turned his back and grabbed his suitcase, which was sitting in the living room. Devin pulled on his jacket, then slammed the front door behind him. It should've hurt Chris more than it did. He just watched what was left of his life walk out the door, yet he barely felt a thing. It was just one more shitty thing he'd have to deal with eventually. Just like everything else, he pushed it to the back of his mind to be buried until it becomes too much for him to handle.

Chris tried to tell himself he didn't need anyone else. They all offer their sympathy until it turns into impatience. He took a shower that night without turning on his radio. Most nights, he doesn't. So many songs remind him of what he'd lost. Now, with one more thing to prick at his heart, he knew he couldn't bare to hear a love song.

The apartment was quiet, aside from the hardwoods creaking when the cats pranced across them. They cried meows while they looked for Devin. Chris sighed, opening Devin's room for them to go rest in. He realized they weren't going to dare to sleep with him. They're mad at him for making their mommy leave.

He'd be sleeping alone, in his dark bedroom. It's not like he's not lonely when Devin is there. They were worlds apart in that California king bed. Chris turned off the lamp, laying his head on the pillow. A little light came in through the window from the street. It just barely could cut through the veil of snow outside.

His sleep was always light. Perhaps it was a fear that he'd get another call like the one that changed his life several Christmases ago. Or maybe a lack of sleep comes from a lack of comfort. Either way, when the clock struck midnight, he couldn't help himself from tossing and turning some. There was some creaking on the floors that he tried to write off as the cats. The cats don't have the ability to yank him out of his sheets.

Chris was pulled off the tall bed. He fell against the hardwoods, still tangled in some of the blankets. Groaning, he tried his best to sit up. If hitting the ground didn't wake him up, a harsh, raspy, familiar voice did.

"Get up, asshole." Ricky scoffed, arms crossed.

His eyes darted up fast. He must've been dreaming, to see his dead band mate and best friend standing in front of him. Chris shot to his feet in an instant. "Ricky, oh my God, Ricky-" He attempted to hug him but the spirit stepped back.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you. I'm a little... cold." He gestured his hand out. As he did, it left a light frost along the Tiffany lamp beside him.

"You're a-"

"Ghost? Yeah. Well, a specter. That's my job now, is to come tell people when they're being fucking dumbass assholes. And you, you're being the king of assholes." He sneered.

"You haven't seen me in four years and this is how you're treating me?" Chris gawked.

Ricky rolled his eyes, "Yes, because you deserve a wake up call. You used to be the best person I knew. You were loving and caring. You'd do anything for anyone, no matter how much they'd burned you in the past. I never knew someone who could forgive like you. Now? You've become a cold, dead fish. You do nothing but hurt those who love you. You take everyone for granted, and if you don't change your ways soon, you're going to lose them.

Do you see these chains?" He grabbed hold of one of the many sets decorating his neckline, wrists, waist, and various other places on his body, "If you continue down the path of selfishness, self-hatred, and pessimism, like I had when I was alive, you'll end up like me; In chains. This will be your fate if you don't change your ways," Ricky stepped closer, his coldness making goosebumps rise on Chris' skin, "And I swear to fuck, if you don't start treating my baby better, I will make sure you rot in fucking Hell when you die."

"Look, I know I haven't been the best to Devin, but I lost everything-"

"No, you didn't." He cut him off, "You are taking for granted the little you have left. Tonight, you will be visited by three specters. If you don't see the errors in your ways by the time they're gone, you'll be doomed to walk the eternal planes in chains."

Ricky took steps backward towards the window. As the sheer curtains blew through his transparent body, his image faded. Chris did feel something for once. He was upset to see his best friend leave as quickly as he'd appeared. If he could, he'd reach out for him and beg him to stay. Instead, he just ended up walking through where he just stood to close the window. He had no clue how it even ended up open.

It must've been a dream, he thought. After the accident, any belief he had in the supernatural was gone. He never saw even a shadow of his loved ones. It had to have been a dream, or an illusion, he thought. If he went back to sleep, he hoped he'd wake up to reality. Chris crawled back in his empty bed and forced himself to close his eyes. After all, why would his late friend be so crude to him? It had to have been a nightmare fueled by a guilty conscious, he figured. 

At one in the morning, the clock range out through the house once again. Chris turned in his sleep restlessly. He didn't know what possessed him to open his eyes but he did. Scanning over the bedroom that's usually pitch black, he saw light coming from the street again. How'd the window get back open? He really didn't care at this point. All he wanted was to go back to sleep.

So, he got up to close it. Chris made sure it was locked before turning back to his bed. He was stopped dead in his tracks to see the one person he missed even more than Ricky. In the rocking chair in the corner of the room, Angelo sat quietly. An angelic glow emitted from him. His face looked just as soft and sweet as Chris had remembered it.

He stumbled some, grasping the edge of his bed. His knees felt like they were going to go out any second. "My angel..." He weakly spoke, then turned his head away, "This is just a dream. This has to be a dream."

"It's not a dream, Chris." Angelo stood up from the chair. He went to reach for his face, then retracted his hand when he remembered he was ice cold. "I want to touch you, but I can't. I'd probably give you frostbite... Do you know why I'm here?"

"Not really... I was told I'd be visited by three specters, to show me the errors of my ways, but I don't possibly understand how anyone expects me to be happy and shit without you, and without the others."

"All you need to be happy is love. You may not have my love anymore, but you do have love. Ashley, Ryan-Ashley, Jeremy, Nikki, Vinny, most importantly, Devin, they're all still there for you. Yet, you treat them horribly. Come." Angelo began to walk towards the door, glancing back at Chris expectantly.

He followed his love, though he feared what he could be walking into. As he stepped through the door of his bedroom, he was met with the heartwarming smell of gingerbread cookies. The lights glowed warmly and the laughter of family could be heard. Not his blood relatives, of course. He never saw them on Christmas due to the fact he was such an outcast. They all were, and that was what made them a family. 

Chris hesitantly walked into the living room where he was met with a Christmas from five years prior. Christmas decorations lined the the mantel and walls. The tree in the middle of the living room was gorgeous. It was covered in the goth-iest of bulbs they could find, of course. Different black, silver, and crystal ornaments were placed on the evergreen with care. 

Ryan-Ashley sat on the floor with her phone out, trying to get Toronto to pose for a picture. The little fluff ball was much too interested in trying to find his present to open. Josh walked in the room, handing her a cup of hot coco as he sat down beside her. Toronto quickly hopped up on the couch and rushed Vinny. He stole his beef jerky right out of his hand. 

"T! C'mon!" Ryan-Ashley mothered him. Being that they were watching the phantom of a memory, her voice sounded somewhat distant. 

"Oh, c'mon," Devin responded as he sat up from having his head in Ricky's lap, "It's Christmas. Let him get away with it just this one."

Vinny pouted, "That was my last piece."

Chris, well... Past Chris rolled his eyes playfully, "I'll get you a whole truck worth if you'll stop complaining."

He sighed, "It's not the same."

"This was the last Christmas we spent together." Chris softly muttered. 

"That was the year Ryan and his girlfriend broke up. You forced him to come, though, and he actually managed to smile for the first time in... weeks, I swear. It was also the year Dev was starting to dress in woman's clothing. You bought him his first dress." Angelo said as he watched the very gift being handed over in the memory. 

"Yeah. I remember later that night, Ricky took me aside and told me that he'd never seen Devin so happy." 

He snit with a small, reminiscent smirk, "Yeah. Do you remember what you got me that year?" 

Chris gently smiled while he watched it happen. His past self picked up a small gift bag off the mantel and handed it to his love. "Before you open it, it's not a ring ring, not yet. It's just a promise ring but I wanted you to know that when I can afford a real ring, you'll get one."

His face lit up to see the small band inside the jewelry box. Angelo stood up, putting his hands on either side of Chris' face, "I love you. I don't care if we're dirt poor or the richest people in the world. All that matters is that I have to."

"I love you too." He softly kissed him and held him close.

"I'd never felt happier in my life." He wholeheartedly said, "You always knew how to make me smile. You could always make all of us smile. Every Christmas, you would cook an entire meal for all of us. And no matter how much of a headache it gave you, you'd call home and talk to your mom for a good half hour. Even after all the work you did, when you'd be dead tired, you'd still give me a massage before bed and make love to me until I was satisfied."

"I can't even remember the last time I had sex with Devin." He muttered.

"Don't forget. There's a different between having sex and making love. You've never given Devin the one thing he needs most and that's someone who loved him as much as Ricky did." Angelo gestured towards the couple, who couldn't keep themselves from off of each other.

"He looks so beautiful when he smiles." Chris mused, "I've never... I've never made him smile like that."

"You could, and that's why I'm showing you this. Just because some of us are gone, doesn't mean you can't still have Christmas. It doesn't mean you can't be happy, and it doesn't mean you're incapable of opening your heart." 

He shook his head, "You're wrong! I love you, but you're wrong! Without you, without the others, I have no reason to care anymore. My family made me who I am and now, there's nothing left of me."

Angelo sighed, the scene around them fading, "Oh, yes, there is, but you refuse to see it. Maybe I can't convince you of it, but hopefully the others can. It's not too late to change your ways. Please, try, for me."

"Wait, please don't go!" He begged as he watched his love's spirit dissolve.

Once again, Chris was left in his empty, cold apartment. The lights were gone along with the love. He shivered, bowing his head. Something was starting to eat him up inside. He wasn't sure if it was the spirits he was seeing or the words they spoke. Chris walked to the kitchen to get himself a glass of milk in hopes it'd help him go back to sleep. He was still trying to convince himself this was a very bad dream or sorts. 

He walked back to his bedroom and sat down on the edge of his bed. This time, he didn't dare go to sleep from fear of being woken up again. Chris tried to think of what to do. Maybe he could write, or read some. He settled for watching a little TV. It was all old Christmas specials though. After flipping through countless channels, he shut it off with a sigh. He laid back on his bed and covered his eyes with his hand.

"Boo!" A voice suddenly startled him.

Chris jumped up, scanning around his room. He didn't see anyone at first. With a sigh, he relaxed some. It must've been his imagination. He turned on his lamp as he took a deep breath. 

"Afraid of the dark?" Josh spoke, now standing in front of the dresser. 

"Damn it." Chris grumbled to himself, "It's not over." 

He walked closer, leaning down to be in his face, "No, it's not over. Not until you wake the fuck up." 

Leave it to Josh to be as blunt as possible. He wasn't going to bother cushioning things for him like Angelo had. He raised his hand and snapped his fingers. Chris stood up quickly out of shock when the entire scene around them had changed. They were now in the home that Josh had once occupied with his loving fiance. 

Josh walked from the entrance into the living room. Despite how hard his demeanor started out, his shell broke to see the love of his life. At 2AM, she was all alone with the cat and dog, watching Miracle On 34th street and lightly crying. Only one lone lamp was on in the dark room. It was depressing to watch, to say the least. Josh leaned over, setting his hand on her face briefly. She couldn't see him but she certainly felt the chill that he caused her. 

"She's all alone, Chris. On Christmas." Josh said, "You did this. You may not be able to bring us back, but damn it, you could at least give a shit about the people we left behind. You were our leader. You were the strong one, the head of our family. It was your responsibility to make sure they were taken care of and you abandon them."

"What did-"

"Don't." Josh cut him off, "Don't come up with any excuses because you have none. You were lucky enough to not be in that accident and all you do is take it for granted. When I died, I remember thinking she'd be okay because she still had you and Devin. But you turned cold, and made him just as cold as you. The both of you left Ryan alone." 

"I... I didn't think about her... I didn't..."

"You didn't think about anyone else's pain except your own." He responded. 

Josh stayed in place a moment longer than he honestly should have. He just wanted to take one last look at her before they had to leave again. With the snap of his finger, they were blinked into a new location. New for them, but not for Devin. The widowed beauty was just as teary eyed as Ryan-Ashley had been. At least he had Vinny beside him on the couch to comfort him.

A black eye was forming under his makeup. It had come from when Chris had struck him earlier in the night. The old HIM shirt Ghost was wearing was once Ricky's. Devin had a stuffed cat in his arms that once belonged to his long lost love as well. Sobs raked his back up and down, "I jus'... I want Ricky back. He'd... He'd never do this to me."

"I know, Dev, I know. I'd do anything to have the others back." He snit a little, "Ya know, I never thought I'd miss Ryan punchin' my food, and the way Ricky used'ta push me off the couch to help you win a round in Super Mario Cart."

Devin choked on his tears as he managed a laugh. He sniffled, "And if you did manage to beat me, he'd throw your controller down the hall, then wrestle you so you couldn't go get it."

He scoffed, "He could be such an asshole to anyone who hurt the smallest hair on your head."

"Yeah," He smiled, "But that's because he loved me that much. Chris would never do something like that." His brief happiness fell again.

"Devin could've left and gone back to California. Instead, he chose to stay with you to help you cope with Angelo's death. You never returned the favor and now you've left him crying, and he's going to spend Christmas on someone's couch." Josh said. 

"I wish I could hug him and hold him. That should be me comforting him. Not Vinny."

"You're the reason he needs comforting in the first place!" He replied, "Don't you get that? Devin not only lost everything, but he gave up what little he had left to be with you. And you treat him like shit."

"Okay, okay, I get it! I've been a piece of shit! I'll start treating Devin better, I promise. I'll make things right in the morning." Chris insisted.

Josh stared back at him, unfazed and displeased. He snapped his fingers a final time to return Chris to his apartment. When he looked around, he saw his own bed and room, but Josh had disappeared. With the time the two had spent arguing, the clock was already running close to 3AM. Only twenty minutes until the final spirit arrived. 

Chris sat down on his bed. He wanted to get this whole thing over with. He'd realized just how real it was. Even if it was really all a dream, he knew these visions were coming to him for a reason. He closed his eyes briefly and sighed. The clock struck 3AM, echoing through the place. A cold breeze swept into the room. He rose his head to see a figure, more ghostly than the last, standing in front of the window. 

That thin frame and short hair, he knew. He should've expected to see him next. Ryan's shirt was aged, the black button down beyond faded. His skin seemed paler than even in life. Even his eyelashes looked dusted with snow. His lips were a misty blue, as if he had froze to death. That's exactly what did happen. The others hadn't reflected their body's state in death, but they didn't have to deliver such a dark message. 

"I suppose you're here to tell me what a dumbass I am too, huh?" Chris asked.

Ryan didn't say a single word. He let the storm do the talking for him. White winds rushed in through the window, blinding Chris. The cold shook his body, raising goosebumps. As he reopened his eyes, he was met with bright light. Snow fell down in his hair from a dreary sky. Taking a look around, he realized he was in a cemetery. 

Wordlessly, he pointed down the path to a funeral in session. There must've been a fifty people surrounding a casket about to be lowered in the ground. Chris didn't want to dare approach from fear of what he'd find. He knew this living nightmare wouldn't end until he followed through with the specter's instruction. 

Chris spotted Devin in the front of the crowd of people as he got closer. He still looked the same, meaning this future wasn't too far from present day. Hesitantly, Chris looked into the casket. He'd expected to see his own body but instead, was met by Ryan-Ashley's. That shocked him more than his own death probably would've.

"The poor thing," He heard someone whisper, "Just couldn't keep going without him."

"No, no, no." Chris shook his head, raising his hands to his mouth, "This is all my fault. This is... I should've, I should've done something."

Ryan swept his hand over the casket. The winds rushed around it, transforming it. All the people disappeared but one; Devin. He now appeared aged, standing alone in a red dress. Chris took a glance into the coffin to find his aged self laying stiff inside. No one else was there. Only his scorned lover, who had worn a blasphemous color just to spite him.

His heels clicked as he walked away. At the end of the path, out on the road, a black car waited for her. Chris didn't see who was driving but he was smart enough to figure out it must've been whomever Devin had left him for. He couldn't stand to lose the one good thing he had left. And if Ryan-Ashley's death became his fault, he knew he couldn't live with himself. Any hesitation he'd previously had about changing his ways completely faded. 

"Please, please take me back. It's not too late for me to fix all this. I promise, I'll be a good husband to Devin. I'll do anything I can to make the others happy. I watch out for Ryan-Ashley, and I'll start to help people again. I'm sorry it ever came to this, but please, please, give me another chance."

Ryan brought his head up slowly to look Chris in the eyes. His own eyes had gone cold and numb, but he still managed a very small smile. Without saying a damn thing, Ryan had managed to complete his mission. He stepped backward as everything faded away until it turned black. Chris closed his eyes to embrace the darkness. It just felt right, like it was what he was supposed to do.

The faint sound of the clock singing woke him up. Opening his eyes, he saw it was almost five in the morning. The sun was starting to come up and birds were singing. Instantly, he jumped out of bed. Chris had never put on clothes and makeup faster in his life. He hopped in his car, the snow still drifting down, and began to drive to Vinny's.

He impatiently rang the doorbell. By the time he arrived, it was only 6:30 in the morning. He didn't really think about the time. That wasn't important at this point. It was something he'd rather not waste. He'd spent the past few years doing so.

In a morning haze, still without his glasses even on, Devin answered the door. He didn't get words out even before Chris grabbed him by his hips and kissed him. Feebly, he pushed him back, "Chris, what the Hell? it's like six in the morning."

"I'm sorry, Baby. I'm so sorry, about everything. I was a fucking idiot and honestly you deserve to kick my fucking ass."

Devin groaned a little when the sunlight got in his eyes, "Where's all this coming from?"

"I... I revisited the past, and thought about my future. I realized how much you've been there for me all while I treated you like garbage. You mean the world to me. You're the most important thing in my life and I'm so sorry I've been so horrible to you. Please," Chris grabbed his hand, kissing his knuckles, "Please come home for Christmas, Baby. I don't want to spend it without you."

He realized this was genuinely, coming from Chris' heart. Devin let his walls fall down for him once again. He placed his hand on Chris' face, cooing, "Oh, Sweetie, you look like you've seen a ghost. Calm down. I'm sorry too, for the things I said last night, and well, all the things I've said. I love you too."

"I won't ever be so stupid again. I promise." Chris pulled their hips together and gave him another kiss. This time, getting a kiss back. He gently rested his curled finger under Devin's chin, "When we get home, I want to make love to you. The way I'm supposed to, the way I should've been all these years. Slowly, softly, like you're the only person in the entire world."

Devin smiled brightly, "That's the Chris I know. I thought I lost you in that accident too. You've been another person these past few years."

He sighed, "I know, and I'm sorry. Go get your things, Baby, and we'll go home. Later tonight, what'd you say we go over to Ryan's and I'll make you ladies a nice dinner?"

"I'd really like that. I think she would too." He grinned, "I'll be right back."

Devin hurried inside to find some pants and grab his things. When he brought his suitcase to the door, Chris picked it up for him. He carried it out to the car and put it in the trunk. Then, opened the passenger door for his love. As he settled into the driver's seat, he grabbed his hand. The two stayed interlocked while they drove back to a house they could finally call a home again.