"Well everyone here checks out." Dufresne started holding his device. "I'll come back and check on you before I leave the canyon. Which way is the red base?"

"Why? You said you weren't going to fight them." Tucker was saying, Louise sighed.

"Are you all a bunch of idiots?" She scoffed.

"I'm not." Continued the medic, ignoring Louise. "Resources are low, so I'm loan to both armies to help whichever side needs me at the time."

Church muttered on, Louise wasn't listening though. She looked on, the Reds were halfway to the Blue base.

Attempting to shoot the device in Dufresne's hand. Church turned.

"Just like that, Scatter!" Called Church who dashed to the nearest rock.

In the distance a pink spartan was shooting a sniper.

"Nice shot, cupcake." The red one ahead of him said.

"Suck it blues!" A maroon one was calling out as he shot his rifle.

A yellowish one stood up, "Yeah! Sneak attack!" He laughed.

"Sit down dumbass, your in the way!" The maroon one said.

Louise just stood there, none of the bullets even flew towards her, she could had ended the fight in a instant. Well she could have, but why get into a battle unprovoked?

"Okay Tucker, get up there and help Caboose shore up the defense, establish a suppressing fire, and hold that position until further notice." Church was shouting out commands as the yellow and maroon shot at the rock they were behind.

"I didn't even understand half of that." Tucker responded.

"Just go over to Caboose and fire your gun a bunch." Church repeated a more understanding phrase.

"That rock?" He looked towards the smaller rock. "Yeah, I don't think so." The teal spartan refused.

"We do not have time to discuss this." The lighter blue was saying.

"Sure, no time for you to discuss it. You get to hang out with Nancy No-Bullets, shooting the breeze." Tucker babbled as Louise tune them out. She was interested in what the reds were saying.

"Siiiiimmmmonsss, I can't feel my hands." Called the yellow one.

"Maybe you should lay off the trigger, dumbass." The maroon one, Simmons, had retorted.

Louise shook her head, how were these.... Idiots allowed in the army?

"Alright, you, Doc, get to help Caboose" Church was saying, giving up on Tucker.

"My name's not Doc." Dufresne said. "It's Dufresne." He corrected.

"Yeah, I can't pronounce that. So from now on, your name is Doc." Church told him.

"I'm not really comfortable with that." Started Dufresne. "I'm not a doctor, I'm a medic."

"What's the difference?" Tucker started. Reds still shooting in the background.

"Do you really just stand around and talk while you are under attack?" Louise spoke out, still just standing in the open.

"What about you?" Church started looking at her. "I mean you're just standing there while they shoot us."

Louise shrugged. "They aren't shooting at me, so not my fight." She looked at the two who stood at the hill as Dufruesne explained the difference.

"Its settled then, you are now Doc." Church finished.

"Alright,  but I don't think it'll stick." He conceded. It seemed as he write his new name in stone and the named flashed onto a screen. DOC.

"Oh trust us, it'll stick." Tucker said.

The battle went on for a while until the reds finally ran put of ammo.

"Why aren't the reds firing?" Tucker asked Church.

"I don't know. Maybe their out of ammo." Responded the light blue spartan.

"Considering they are trying to make you surrender, that's a yes" The orange and blue agent responded. The reds were all together.

"Hey, Blues!" The leader called making Church turned. "We're giving you a chance to surrender!"

"See." Louise said. The blues and Doc turned towards them.

"What are your terms?" Called back.

"Wait, you're seriously going through this?" The Agent started.

"Yeah, it's like this all the time." Caboose was standing next to Louise. "Hi, I'm Caboose."

"Yeah, Yeah. Shh, its like I'm watching some messed up show and sooner or later something cooler is gunna happen." Muttered Louise.

"First off, we want your flag!" The red started before the other reds were talking. "To stay right where it is." He continued. "Keep the flag."

"But we do want our mechanized droid guy back!" He commanded.

"Uh-oh." Church started.

"You may know him as Senor el Roboto." Sarge, Agent Louisiana had heard from one of them, had explained.

"Well Church, what's it gunna be?" Tucker asked.

"I'm not giving up my body!" Church told him. "I just got this!"

"I still don't believe ghosts are real..." Louise started. "He could be something else maybe! Like a program..."

"And don't think you can keep his nuts," Sarge was shouting in the distance. "...or bolts or other mechanical parts."

"Um, yeah, he's not here anymore." Church lied.

"He was all like, Sayonara. And then he just took off!" Tucker finished.

"Do these guys even understand Spanish? I bet the had messed up the speech on that robot and he became annoyed that they can't understand them..." Louise just continued to rant as they were discussing surrender terms.

"Thats not Spanish, thats French!" Church told Tucker before turning back and offering them Doc. "Hey Reds, how about a medic! you could take him as a hostage."

"A hostage?" Doc started, "But I'm supposed to go over there."

The reds seemed to be discussing in the distance. Church turned to Doc asking him how Caboose was. After all he shot his toe off, literally.

Eventually Church, again, turned back. "Okay, we're going to send over out medic! Now what do we get?"

"You guys really don't understand what surrendering is, do you." Louise started, Tucker glanced at her for a second before looking back.

"All you get is humiliation and ridicule!" Simmons called.

"We've already got that!" Tucker responded. "What else do you have?"

"What do you want?" Sarge questioned.

"How about you admit that Red Team sucks?" Church yelled.

"What if we admit that one of us sucks?"

It took about two hours to discuss terms as Louise just sat in the back, watching.

"Okay then, we agree to the terms?" Church asked the red team. "You first, then we send over the medic."

"Go on Grif." Sarge told the yellowish one.

Grig groaned. "I would just like to let everyone know that I suck." He started.

"And?" Church prompted.

"And that I'm a girl."

"What else?"

"And I like ribbons in my hair, and I want to kiss all the boys."

"This is both insulting and funny." Pointed out Louisiana. "What will you do next time you surrender? The same thing but a different person?"

"Is that good enough." Simmons asked.

"Yeah!" Church told them, "Alright, go ahead Doc."

The purple medic walked over.

"Man, I really hope you're worth this." Grif muttered.

"Can I ask you a question?" Doc started. "Do they put something in the water here?"

Louise, hearing this, gasped. "Oh my gosh, do they? Is that why you are all like this?"

"Nah, we ran out of water months ago." Tucker responded.

"So, dehydration." Louise started, "fun. Right, now where to start here." Louise started, following the blues into the base.

A/N
Just warning you IK i put Yellowish/Yellow armor on Grifs desc on purpose. Because he hates it, and thats what it looks like to Louise.... Not to mention i am partially colour blind