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If I'm being honest, I'm not afraid of loving someone. I'm scared I won't be loved back.
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Dec 4, 2019
Taehyung's POV

Our vacation in Osaka ended quickly, and Jimin did well by not telling Jungkook, and at nights he slept with me. So, I had long phone calls with Amy every night, and my eagerness to meet her was at its highest. Today, it was time for me to leave to Taiwan for a couple of weeks for the fan-meet and promotions, ad-film shoots and fan club activities. Jimin and Jungkook would be taking a break in Seoul for a week and then head to their hometown.

"Jimin-ah, you'll be alone with Jungkook. Don't get drunk and tell him anything, okay? I will tell everyone soon," I informed him.

"I won't, Taehyung. I'll be careful. Don't worry," Jimin smiled cutely and patted my shoulder.

Soon, we parted ways, and my phone buzzed with an incoming call from my dad.

"Appa, how are you?" I asked cheerfully.

"Taehyung-ah, we're good. Why don't you come over for Christmas? Your brother and sister will be here too. It's been so long since we all spent time together," he suggested and waited for my response.

"Appa, I'll surely be there," I said with a big smile.

"Where are you now?" He asked.

"I'll be leaving Osaka today. A couple of weeks in Taiwan, and then I'll be back to Seoul," I informed him as I settled down in the waiting lounge at the airport.

"Great then. You can come here earlier," he announced happily.

"Alright. I'll be there soon," I smiled and leaned back in my seat, running a hand through my hair.

"See you soon, Taehyung,"

"Yeah, see you. I love you, Appa. Bye," I ended the call, sighing.

I want to spend time with my parents. But I also want to meet Amy. I don't know what to do. If I stayed with my parents, I wouldn't be able to meet Amy, at least not on Christmas Day. I will tell her first.

I called her, and she answered the call at once.
"Amy, are you at work?" I asked, and she hummed in response.

"Yeah, Taehyung. What are you doing?" She asked me.

"I'm leaving Osaka now, and I'll be headed to Taiwan in an hour," I informed her while checking the time on my watch.

"Oh, that's amazing, Taehyung. Have a nice time there," Amy spoke sweetly.

"I will. But I so want to meet you," I sulked and sighed.

"We'll meet as soon as you come back, baby," she spoke comfortingly.

"I'll be headed over to be with my parents for Christmas once I'm at Seoul," I informed her, and she remained silent for a few seconds.

"That's nice, Taehyung. Christmas is best spent with family. You've decided to do the right thing," she said, sounding cheerful and clearly a bit disappointed as well.

But I want you to be my family too

"What are you doing this Christmas?" I immediately regretted asking that since it would seem as if I was mocking her.

Amy sighed softly.
"Jay and I will probably set up the tree and go around watching Christmas lights every evening. We'll probably cook and eat and stay at home. What else?" She chuckled lowly.

"Okay... you have fun, okay? I'll call you every day, and we'll meet soon. I miss you so much," I said sadly and kissed my phone, hoping it reached her cheek.

"I love you, baby," she said softly, returning my kiss.

"Love you too, baby," I let out a sigh, and then we ended the call.

Amy's POV

I washed and neatly folded Taehyung's cardigan that I practically lived with for about two months. I already bought him a bear-printed necktie as his Christmas present and wrapped it prettily, feeling super excited that I would finally meet him once he reached Seoul.

Work was hectic, and we had a meeting yesterday where we were informed that we were all granted paid vacation for around a week starting from tomorrow, which was quite unusual for the hospital staff. I felt a sense of relief for various reasons—the extreme cold weather being one and Taehyung's upcoming birthday being the other.

Today as I was heading to work, Taehyung called and told me that he would be spending Christmas with his parents.

It made sense to me because it was what everyone did—spend time with family on Christmas Day. I didn't expect that he would spend this Christmas with me, but I at least hoped that we could meet that day.

I suddenly felt a void. I felt as if I was growing too dependent on Taehyung. If I had my own family, I wouldn't have been so eager to meet him on Christmas day. But it wasn't my fault that I didn't have a family.

And being the introvert that I am, it was also hard for me to get along with everyone and have a big circle of friends like Taehyung had. He was someone who was always surrounded by people, and his social skill were amazing. But that wasn't my case.

Of course, I quickly consoled myself that Jay was there for me. We will spend time together on Christmas Day since we would both be on vacation for a week, and Allan would be going on a vacation to his hometown in America. And there were still a few more weeks until Christmas.

I do not want to become that clingy girlfriend. So, even though my expectations went down the drain, I still told Taehyung with a smile that he had made the sensible choice.

Leaving from work earlier than usual, I hoped to meet him at least on his birthday. I decided to go shopping to buy him a birthday present although I wasn't sure if I would meet him on his birthday, but it was not wrong to be ready. After a lot of walking around and an unending dilemma, I went back home without buying anything since I couldn't decide what to buy.

Dec 24, 2019

Taehyung arrived in Seoul a couple of nights ago. His arrival was delayed because he went on a sudden, unplanned vacation along with his 'Hwarang hyungs'.

I didn't know when we would be able to meet again. Although we spoke every day—sometimes on voice and sometimes on video—I still missed him so badly.

It was Christmas Eve, and there were only a few texts from Taehyung ever since he went to his parents' house. I didn't want to pester him, but I missed him a lot. Yet, I didn't ever tell him that because he surely needed his space which I didn't want to interfere with.

That night, Jay and I stayed up late watching a movie, and Taehyung called me at around 1 am. Grabbing my phone and answering the call, I walked into the bedroom.

"Merry Christmas, Taehyung," I said excitedly.

"Merry Christmas, Amy. What are you doing?" He asked, sounding more cheerful than usual.

"Jay and I were watching a movie. It's almost done. What are you doing?" I asked as I was lying down in bed.

"We were eating and talking and just now everyone went to bed, and I came to call you. I miss you a lot, baby," his deep voice and the sounds of his breathing stirred my heart.

"Taehyung, I love you lots, and I miss you so much," I whined and buried myself inside the duvet.

"Amy, I really want to see you soon," Taehyung said, and I heard ruffling sounds in the background telling me that he was in bed.

I so wanted to ask him if we could meet on his birthday, but I stopped myself and decided to talk about something else.

"Baby, I want to tell you something... I dreamed about you," I chuckled and hugged a pillow and turned to my side, pressing the phone to my ear.

Taehyung let out an amused chuckle.
"Wow... really? I do every night and sometimes during the day too. What happened in yours, tell me."

"It was not now but way before when we started getting closer. I didn't know it was you in my dream," I said softly.

"How did you not know?" He was curious.

"Because I couldn't see your face. I could only see your back, shoulders and hair," I felt goosebumps thinking about the mysterious dream that kept coming back, and how it got interrupted every time I tried to look at my man's face.

"Tell me all about it," he breathed out, making my skin bristle.

I elaborated the dream and when it happened and how I decided to say yes to him.

"Wow... I love you so much, Amy," he passed on a few loud kisses making me giggle.

"I love you more, Taehyung," I returned his kisses with my own.

The more I wanted to be less dependent on him, the more I ended up being more dependent on him. I couldn't help free-falling into the abyss.

"Taehyung, it's late now. We should sleep. I'll be on leave till the new year, and you can call me any time, okay?" I told him, wishing he was right by my side, badly missing the night we cuddled to sleep on the same bed where I lay alone now.

"Okay, baby... sleep now. I'll see you in your dreams," he chuckled.

I giggled,
"I'll see you in yours. Bye, baby." We both ended the call, my eyes closed automatically, and I slept in a flash.

Jay and I woke up at noon every day of our Christmas vacation, and we were on 'eat-sleep-repeat' mode. Taehyung called every night, and we spoke for hours at length, but I felt hopeless about meeting him on his birthday since he talked about other plans he had made for that day. I consoled myself that I could meet him and give him the gifts later.

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TaeTae's birthday coming up!! Will they meet?
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