For the first time ever, Faeryn had lied to Thranduil, and it went better than she had thought. The words came naturally, the lie was smooth, effortless and surprisingly, the guilt was short.

The elleth did not know why she lied. At that very moment, her heart ached as if it was sucked into a pit led to nowhere but darkness and chaos; the ache was unbearable and for once, Faeryn regretted asking, but what else could she do then but to smile and gave him an empty promise?

A lot, yes, Faeryn could have done a lot of different things, and yet she chose to lie. She knew that everything had changed, it had already since many, many years ago, just that they were both ignorant about the truth. The idea of Thranduil being betrothed scared her, and as ridiculous as it might, Faeryn felt like she was losing her friend for good.

Then why did she even tell him to wait? That everything was going to be fine? Faeryn wondered in silent tears. Her feet led her back to her room as if it was an instinct, despite how blur her vision was. Why did she say that while her heart tells the difference? With her face pressed against the pillow, blocking the glorious sunlight of the supposed-to-be-good day, Faeryn wished she had a book of answers for her questions.

She had been sleeping for a very long time due to weariness and only woke up to a chant of knocking on her door. Groaned in tiredness, the elleth stirred slightly on the soft mattress; her eyes stuttered as she tried in seldom consciousness to open, which turned out to be quite a challenge since they were awfully heavy and so was her head.

Faeryn slowly realized how sore her eyes were and soon remembered how she had cried into sleep. She could not catch her breath nor could she move; Faeryn was both hungry and emotionally unstable.

"Lady Faeryn? I'm here to help you." A female elf said from the other side of the wooden board.

Faeryn sighed. She was perfectly aware of the help she was offered and those were no doubt fresh clothes and a nice hot bath. The elleth could not help a sense of unwanted privilege, however, she knew, but for the maiden's knocks, she would be still sleeping looking like a disaster.

"Come in." As she was sitting up, Faeryn said. With that, the door creaked open and a brunette poked her head inside. "Good afternoon, Mireth, I suppose the time is right?"

Mireth strode quickly towards her Lady as she managed not to drop the tray on her hands in an impressive speed. As concern as might, the maid put down the tray and reached out for Faeryn. Faeryn knew she was relatively smelly and grateful that Mireth was sensitive enough to not give her a friendly reminder.

"I'm sorry to have you see me in such state. It has been a long day." Awkwardly, she gained a smile.

"Don't be worried, Milady, I have seen worst. You are still as beautiful as ever." Mireth assured; for once, Faeryn did not recognize it as a flattery, she was, in fact, pleased to hear it as a compliment coming from a friend.

"Your kindness warms my heart, Mireth. It warms my aching heart." The maiden sighed in frustration. Only by the mention of it could crack her little heart open, Faeryn felt lost and blind as she was hurting from Thranduil's betrothal.

"What's the matter, Milady? Is there anything I can do for you?"

"Sit with me." Faeryn sent a notion by patting on her bed.

Mireth hesitated; the reaction did not escape Faeryn's eyes. "Please, I insist. Unless your reluctance comes from your discomfort with my current inconvenience." She said.

"Oh no, I wouldn't dare!" Mireth shook her head in frantically. Looking at such respect she received, Faeryn winced at the thought that she definitely scared the poor Silvan.

"Please, Mireth. Do not lower yourself to me. I am no royal blood, just a Silvan elf as you are. And here I am, asking for a friend. Will you be one of mine?"

It took Mireth minutes to nod. Her acceptance brought a smile to Faeryn's lips and soon, the two elleths found themselves engaged in each other's stories and personal thoughts. They got along surprisingly well after the barrier was torn down by sincerity and comfort.

Faeryn saw another side of bravery and loyalty in the usual shy, obedient maid; that side fascinated her, seeing how different one can be after knowing them. To Faeryn, the elleth named Mireth was something special and perhaps the caterpillar would become a butterfly someday.

"You didn't tell me why you look so devasted earlier. What went wrong, dear?" Mireth asked her. Faeryn opened her mouth to respond, however the moment her lips parted and the words were being fathomed, came again the agony. Mireth saw the changes in her, Faeryn could tell, as the brunette frowned apologetically.

"If it's meant to be hidden then don't say it."

Faeryn shook her head.  "It's better when spoken." Taking a long, tiring breath, she gazed quietly at the fading sun outside the window. "Have you ever... - have you ever realized something so shocked that in the later it felt like you don't know yourself anymore and that it hurts even to breath?"

"And you have. I guess that's why you are sad?"

"I have. Lord Thranduil was betrothed to the princess of Aerindel."

Pure shock painted Mireth's face. The elleth showed varied emotions, the way she looked at Faeryn was relatively strange. Faeryn did not realize she was not simply sad or hurt, that all those negative emotions came from a dream that was shattered, it opened another part of life which Faeryn never planned to experience. But how lucky it was, Mireth did.

"In other words, can I say you are in love, Milady?" The question startled the green eyed.

Exclaimed Faeryn instantly, "How absurb! I'm sorry, but this has-"

"Has everything to do with the heartache. It's a kind of heartache that you can feel in your bones, Lady Faeryn." Mireth reached for the confused elleth's shoulder. "Everyone here knows about your relationship with our King. And I was almost sure that you two would soon grow into something more without realizing it."

"That's... It still does not give an absolute answer. Asuming it was, after all, isn't it?"

"Looks can be deceiving, love can too. But all it takes is a little knock in the heart to know what's real and what's not. I see how Your Majesty looks at you, if it isn't love, then I don't know what is."

Panic built up inside Faeryn as she found herself closer to the answer. She was afraid that it was real because if it was, she would never able to look at Thranduil the same way again. Faeryn wanted simplicity, she did not wish to change what it had been like for over a thousand years of their lives. Her place was not with Thranduil, it could be behind him or below him, but as a Silvan elf, royal blood did not run in her veins, she could not be in where his Queen would.

"This is wrong, Mireth. I do not love him. I DO NOT!"

"You don't or you can't? Can you see the darkness, Milady? Or can you hear the silence? Love is abstract, therefore, can you give love a reason to exist or say what must it do?" Mireth bombarded Faeryn with questions that hit her conscious.

Faeryn hated not knowing something and now, she wished not to know what her heart demanded. She didn't want to see the dark nor to hear the silence, she was already in one.

"You have forever to sort it out, haven't you?" Mireth asked.

Faeryn doubted it greatly. The princess was on her way; Faeryn did not know how long in forever had she got left.