( NAME GAME )

PADALECKI MANSION
[ ☼ ]

      Sam, Elena and Dean enter the mansion. Dean notices the paintings of Sam. "Nice modest digs, Jay-z." Dean jokes.

       "Wow. I must be the star of this thing." Sam says.

      "Yeah, right. Check it out." Dean nods towards a tanning bed.

       "What am I, Dracula?" Sam asks.

        "George Hamilton Dracula." Dean spots a liquor cabinet. "Oh. Now we're talking." He peers out the glass doors. "Dude, you have a camel in your backyard."

       "It's an alpaca, dumbass."

       "Ruby?" Dean asks.

       "'Ruby'. Right. That one never gets old." Genevieve turns to Sam. "How was work today, hon?" She kisses Sam.

        "Nina, it's great to see you!" Genevieve says smiling and hugs Elena. "We're still on for the manicures right?"

       Elena tries to fake a smile. "Yep. I can't...wait."

       "Wait. You and Ruby?" Dean asks.

       "Do you honestly think that's funny, Jensen?" Genevieve says.

       "Right. Right. 'cause you're not Ruby. You...I mean, how could you be? You...Of course! You are the lovely actress who plays Ruby. And you are, uh, in...Jared's house, Uh, because you two are..." Dean spots a photo on the mantle of Jared and Genevieve's wedding. "Married! You married fake Ruby?" He sees another photo of Genevieve and Nina on a ski trip, hugging very close. "And Nina is your BFF."

       "What are you doing?" Genevieve asks.

       "Work. Work." Sam says.

        "Yeah, just, uh, thought I'd pop in, say "hey." Hey. Uh, and—and—and maybe run some lines. It's..."

         "You've never even been to our house." Genevieve says.

         "Well, now that I know there's an alpaca out back, I'm definitely coming back." Dean says.

       "Well, alpacas are the greenest animal."

         "Right. Right. That is so important." Dean says.

        "Well, there's that thing I have to get to." Genevieve says.

        "Oh, yeah. Of course, yeah. The thing." Sam says.

       "The international otter adoption charity dinner with Ian?" Genevieve asks.

       "Oh." Sam says.

        "Okay, well..." Genevieve kisses Sam. "Well, I'm glad you two are talking, anyway."

       "Yeah." Sam says as they watch Genevieve leave the room.

       "Well, looks like you did all right." Dean says.

       "Yeah. Yeah. I should figure out her name."

PADALECKI LIBRARY
[ ☾]

      Sam is sitting at a desk with a computer in front of a giant portrait of Jared as a cowboy with a suit of armor on either side. "wrist bone of saint and holy reliquary. Museum-quality, from diocese in Oaxaca." - Looks legit." Sam says.

      "All right. Auction house is in Mexico City. We could be there day after tomorrow." Dean says. "We, uh, case it, yank it, be back here by the end of the week."

      "Or we could just buy it." Sam says.

      "What?! Dude, that thing's over a hundred thou—" Dean starts and Sam holds up a black credit card. "Hello, Jared Padalecki."

      Sam is on the phone. "Cubrir a su amigo en la aduana. no? Bueno. " he says.

      "Triple rush. No problemo. Because money is no ob—This baby's maxed." Dean says.

       "Wow. They said it should be at the airport first thing in the morning." Sam says.

       "Money, man. There is nothing like it. All right. Couch. Tv star. Beauty rest." Dean jumps onto the large black couch and lays down. "Ahh."

PADALECKI HALLWAY
[ ☾]

      Sam walks into the hall and spots Genevieve. "Hey! Hey. Hi. Hi, uh, Gen—Genevieve. Gen?" He asks.

      "Gen."

       "Gen. Of course. Yeah. Um, so, h—how was the...Otter thing?" Asks Sam.

       "It was good." Genevieve says.

       "Yeah?" Sam asks.

       "Everybody missed you there."

        "Oh. Wow. Wow. I bet. So—so listen, I-I got to ask you a question." Sam says. "Do you remember, uh, uh, year before last, all those disasters?"

       "Disasters?" Genevieve asks.

       "Yeah.Yeah, yeah, the whole earthquake spike. You know, the—the 9.2 in Rome? I mean, the—the 8.5 outside Boston? The whole east/west tsunami chain?"

       "Yes. I remember all of those from last season on your show." Says Genevieve.

       "No, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I-I know. I know. That—that's what I mean. That's what I was..." Sam takes a drink from his beer.

       "You have been Sam Winchester way too long." Genevieve kisses Sam, takes him by the hand, and leads him upstairs.

AIRPORT
[ ☼ ]

      Sam receives package from an airplane. "Thanks." He says.

       "So I don't mean to pry, but, uh, why are we picking up packages at 8:00 A.M. that haven't cleared customs yet?" Clif asks.

       "Just saving time." Dean says as Sam enters the car with the package. "All right, here we go."

       "We're not doing anything illegal, are we?" Clif asks.

       "Would it make you feel better if we said no?" Elena asks.

        "No."

SUPERNATURAL SET

BOBBY'S HOUSE
[ ☼ ]

      Sam and Dean open the package and are surprised when the lights above them turn on. "Whoa. What?" Dean asks.

      "We finish today in 12 hours if it kills us all. Get "a" and "b" cam for scene 12. What is this?" Robert turns to Sam, Elena and Dean. "Here for the first run-through, before anyone else? Dedication."

      Dean looks at Bob. "Uh, can I talk to you for a second? Um, we're gonna need the, uh, set cleared for—safe side, an hour or so." He says.

       "You need it cleared." Bob sagas

       "Yeah. Yeah. Me and, um...Jared and Nina were gonna do some actor stuff." Dean says.

       "Jensen, we're thrilled to see you collaborating so creatively. And your enthusiasm is refreshing. Dean Cain was like that on "Lois," And that man's a real actor. And we will clear this set exactly when we shoot the 2 3/8 pages we are scheduled to shoot on this set. So you do your "actor stuff" and we'll do our "camera stuff" and, uh..." He says as Dean walks away sheepishly.

      "Ooh, "priority."what's in it?" Misha asks as he looks at the package.

       "I bought part of a dead person." Sam says.

       "Oh, cool." Misha says.

       "Uh, so, bad news." Dean says. "Uh...Looks like we're gonna have to do a little acting."

       "What?" Elena asks.

       "'Supernatural' scene 36, take 1. Marker!"

       "Action!" Bob yells. Sam and Dean stand behind Misha. Sam looks utterly terrified and Dean is staring earnestly.

       "Balthazar is no hero. But he knows Raphael will never take him back." Misha turns around. Sam flinches, Dean walks forward and then looks down at his mark and moves over to his right.

      "Cut!" Bob yells.

      "'Supernatural' scene 36, take 8. Marker!" A Crewmember yells.

       "Action!"

       Sam seems unsure of what to do with his arms and keeps rearranging them, folding, unfolding. "Balthazar is no hero. But he knows Raphael will never take him back." Misha says.

       Dean looks at he script in his hand. "And yet, somehow you got no problem with it." He says.

       "Cut!" Bob yells and Misha turns to the camera and mouths 'what the hell'. "Action."

       "That's because...That's because we have no other choice." Sam says.

       "Don't look at the camera." Dean says

       "What?" Sam asks.

       "Look anywhere but the camera."

        Sam looks at the ceiling. "That's because we have no other choice!" He yells.

       "Cut! For the love of... Action. Cut!" Bob says.

        Sam raises his arm stiffly. "If there's a key, then..." He raises other arm. "...there must also be a lock."

       "Cut. Action."

        "If there's a key...then there has to be a lock. And when we find the lock, we can get the weapons, and then we can have the weapons." Sam says. "And the lock. We'll still have the lock, I imagine, because we've opened it, and, of course, the initial key."

       "We need to get all three of that crap." Dean says.

       "What?" Elena asks.

       "That's how he talks." Dean says.

        "Oh."

         Dean looks out the window, at Bob. "Do we really need all these lines? I mean, I-I-I-I think we've covered it. Right?" He asks.

       "Cut! What is happening? What's happening?! What's happening?!" Bob asks.

       "An atrocity is happening." Serge says.

       "Seems like they should stop." Kevin says.

       "They can't stop. Nobody stops. Did we get anything we can use?" Robert asks.

        "Well, uh, technically, we have them saying everything in bits and pieces. Could be sort of experimental."

       "Whatever. Season six." Robert says.

       Sam looks at script. "Who wrote this? Nobody says "penultimate!" He yells.

       "Gun, mouth." Dean makes gun gesture at his mouth. "Now."

       Elena looks at her script. "I barely have any lines. It's like I'm not even in this show." She says.

       "Moving on!"

        "Thank god." Dean says.

       Misha is tweeting on his phone. "I-m-h-o, 'J' and 'J' and the Dobrevinator had a late one last night." He says.

       Sam and Dean rapidly unpack the package and assemble the spell. "All right, damn it. We earned this." Dean says.

        "r-o-t-f-l-m-a-o."

        Sera via Bob's phone. "Spell it out for me, please. What is our terror-alert level here?" She asks.

       "I don't know, Sera. Orange, maybe? They started talking to each other." Bob says.

       "What?! But that's a good thing."

        "Right. I thought so. But now Jensen and Nina are living at Jared's house." Bob says. Dean completes the blood sigil on the window.

       "That's it?" Elena asks.

        "Plus, Clif says they're smuggling illegal stuff in from Mexico."

        "That's it, toto." Dean says.

        "Misha's celebrity tweet says it's a black-market organ thing. I'm betting drugs." Kevin says.

        "Anyway, as far as I can see, I think they've lost any shred of talent they ever had." Bobby says as Sam, Elena and Dean come crashing through the window, but just land on the other side of the set.

       "Drugs." Says Kevin.

JENSEN'S TRAILER
[ ☼ ]

      "Maybe we did it wrong." Sam says.

       "No. No, that—that spell was perfect. It should have worked." Dean says.

       "What if it can't?" Sam asks. "Look, I was up all night, looking online. There's no sign that anything like the apocalypse happened here. Ever. And as far as I can tell, monsters, ghosts, demons—they're all pretend."

       "So nobody's hunting them?" Dean asks.

        "No hunters. Look, maybe that's why our spell didn't work, Dean, you know? M-maybe here, there's no supernatural, no magic."

        "No demons, no hell, no heaven, no—no god?" Elena asks.

        "Something like. Even better—No angels." Sam says.

SUPERNATURAL SET

MOTEL ROOM
[ ☼ ]

       A sigil glows and Virgil crashes through landing on the set

SUPERNATURAL SET

GREEN SCREEN
[ ☼ ]

       Sam, Elena and Dean walk in front of the green screen where two stunt doules are punching each other next to the Impala. "Okay, maybe we can't get out of, uh, you know, Earth number two right now, but the least we can do is get the hell out of the Canadian part of it." Dean says.

        "Yeah." Elena says.

       "I hear one more conversation about hockey, I'm gonna puke." Dean says.

       "Wait a minute. This way, this way, this way." Sam says.

       "No, no, no, no, no. It's this way. It's this way!"

       "No, Dean, look, I really—I really think that we should—" Sam spots Virgil. "Dean!"

       "You think you can run?" Virgil lays his hand on Dean's forehead, but nothing happens.

       "No!" Sam yells.

       "Sorry, dude. Mojo-free zone." Dean punches Virgil.

       "No magic in the house." Elena says.

       "Which makes you nothing but a dick." Dean says.

       "You know, I oversee all the stunts, coordinate all the fights." Lou says.

       "That's exciting." A Woman gestures to where Sam and Dean are punching Virgil. LIs that one of yours, then?l

       Lou calls his stuntmen over. "Guys!" He says.

       Kevin comes running towards Sam, Dean and Virgil. "Not good! Not good!" He yells.

       Sam speaks as he's being pulled off of Virgil. "No, no, no, no! Stop! You don't understand! No, no, no!" He says as Virgil grabs the key from Sam's pocket.

       "You're dead, Virgil! Virgil! I'm gonna break your friggin' neck! Hey!" Dean yells.