" and that was when I knew she'd fallen too "

"Penelope Dane?"

I looked up from my book and smiled as the doctor entered the small check up room. She was quick to pull out a pen, jotting down the numbers from the machine by my bed before unhooking the wires from my arm.

"Here for a check up? We should be able to see the gender if you'd like," she said kindly, motioning for me to lie back.

I grinned, "Yeah, my mother says I should be surprised, but I hate being left in the dark," I rubbed a hand over my stomach to pull up my shirt, letting the doctor spread the gel and begin the ultrasound, "I can't wait to start buying things for this little peanut."

I watched as the doctors smile faded, her eyes becoming guarded as she focused intently on the screen. My breathing halted as my thoughts turned dark.

What's wrong with my baby? Why isn't she talking? Why is there no heartbeat?

The doctor cleared her throat, a grimace on her face, "I'm so sorry, Penelope. . ."

.

Weeks passed in a blur. My mother tried to convince me that 'these things happen', but I couldn't wrap my head around it being a possibility. Not with today's technology. My body was healthy; I'd never smoked, drank, or done drugs. I hadn't been exerting myself nor was I under any stress. It just didn't seem possible for my sweet baby to not make it out of my womb. It wasn't fair.

My mother signed me up for a support group after the doctor recommended it. I hadn't gone to the first two meetings, but I was guilted into going to the third.

That's where I met her.

Esme Cullen was a volunteer at the grief center. With her silky curls and her kind honey eyes, I was entranced. I'd never been interested in women before, but Esme? Esme has the ability to make anyone question their sexuality.

"Hello," she'd said, her plump lips turning upwards into a gentle smile, "Can I help you?"

I stood frozen before her, not missing the flash of her eyes as they changed to a deep black color. I chose to ignore it, deciding that her eyes were beautiful no matter the color.

That's when I began to fall.

.

After that day I began attending the meetings regularly. I hated delving into the emotions I so badly wanted to suppress, but seeing Esme made all the pain seem worth it.

Esme and I had conversations well into the late afternoon, only saying goodbye when the custodians told us that it was closing time. I found myself memorizing the little things she had offhandedly mentioned like how she loved cooking but rarely had the opportunity or how her brother, Carlisle, and she often spent time together reading medical journals.

It wasn't long after we began talking, maybe two weeks, that she invited me to meet her family. She'd been so excited to cook for me, bouncing around the pristine kitchen as I watched from the counter. Her family helped of course, Carlisle and his son Emmett chopping vegetables as the two girls, Rosalie and Alice, flipped through a recipe book. They were a cute family, one that made me think about what kind of family I would have in the future and if Esme would be a part of it.

Edward and Jasper showed up after I had eaten, apologizing for being late and politely excusing themselves afterwards, Alice quickly following behind Jasper. Emmett and Rosalie followed soon after claiming to be tired though it was only seven o'clock.

Carlisle had stayed and chatted until eight before he left, leaving Esme and I to clean the kitchen together. She'd tried to stop me from helping, but I insisted. And I was glad I did because not soon after we were playfully bumping one another. Lingering touches passed between us and I felt my heart pound.

That's when I knew I'd fallen.

.

Two months passed and Esme and I were inseparable. Loving smiles and gentle caresses were shared often, yet we remained just friends. Alice often pushed me to ask Esme on a date, but I always refused. My nerves would never allow it.

Three months passed and I stopped going to the grief center. I still had depressive episodes, but they happened infrequently and were no where near as emotionally draining. It helped that Esme was there. She knew how to hover without being annoying, and I couldn't help but think about how good of a mother she would be.

Four months passed and Esme met my family. They had been away to visit family for a few months, but I spoke to them often about the kind woman I'd met. It was interesting to see my mother speak so naturally with Esme, as if they were old friends. They conversed animatedly during our visit, pausing throughout the night to help family members in the kitchen but always returning to their friendly banter.

That was the night my mother had pulled me aside and said she approved.

.

Esme had been distant, ignoring my calls and texts. I hadn't seen her in a week and I was beginning to feel disheartened.

Does she know about my feelings for her? Does she not want to ever speak again? Does she hate me now?

I knew in the back of my mind that it was ridiculous, but it wasn't until she showed up at my door that I was able to rid the thoughts from my head. Esme stood in the rain, her hair sticking to her face and her eyes a deep black as she pulled me into a firm embrace.

"I missed you so much," she muttered, lips brushing against my neck, flustering me beyond words, "I'm so sorry for leaving." She pulled away, a determined expression marring her delicate features.

And then she kissed me.

And that was when I knew she'd fallen too.

.

"Penelope, Darling, it's time to leave," Esme called, a hand resting elegantly against the door frame as she gazed lovingly upon the frazzled Penelope, "Do you need any help?"

Penelope turned swiftly, offering a smile, "No, I think I'm good," she paused, running a shaky hand through her hair, "I'm just nervous. What if she doesn't like me?"

Esme swiftly pulled Penelope into a hug, smiling as she snuggled into the cool embrace, "She'll love you, Darling. Just trust me."

"Always," Penelope stated, "I just- what if I'm not a good mom? What if I'm not what she expected?"

Esme scoffed lightly, "You're going to be the best mom," she pulled away, looking into Penelope's eyes with uncharacteristic mischief, "Well, maybe second best. After me."

With a grin Penelope rolled her eyes. She took a deep breath before placing a kiss upon Esme's lips and grasping her hand firmly, "Well, lets go meet her then."

word count: 1148