I'm crying, crying out of nowhere
Anger is building up in my body
I lie on my chest, pondering about life

My true smile deteriorates everyday
My actual happiness slowly diminishing
My real laughter almost gone

My head is turning
My heart is thumping
My palms are sweaty

But I hide
I hide behind a plastered smile
I cover my pain with fake laughter

I want to have the sweet release of death
But someone keeps me going
That someone is special

A special someone keeps me going
Keeps me alive, keeps me here
But even then, my smiles are faux and my laughs are forced