In My Time Of Dying.

CHAPTER ONE , YOUR CALL HAS BEEN FORWARDED

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Flashback

"Hey, this is Sydney Wilson! Sorry, I can't come to the phone right now! Leave a message and I'll get back to you!"

"Wow, so, it's Wilson now? What are you married or just trying something new?" Dean lets out an awkward laugh. He trails off his laughter and clears his throat. "Anyway, I could use your help with something, Syd."

"And I know that it's kind of shitty that this is the first time I'm talking to you after...forever, but I...this is important." Dean runs a hand over his face. "It's my dad, he's missing and I need you. Your help! I need your help."

One Week Later...

"Hey, Syddie. I don't know if you got my message from last week, but I'm on my way to see Sammy. After years. Kind of like us, huh?" Dean pulls the phone away from him and quietly curses. "Why are you so weird?" He whispers.

"I'm kind of nervous, to be honest. I mean, what do I say?" Dean nervously chuckles. "It took me a while to build up the courage to call you." He sighs. "Uh, I'm gonna go. But call me when you get this, please."

Three Weeks Later...

"Hey, Sydney it's me, Dean! And I miss you so—"

"Sam!" Dean snatches his phone from his brother. Sam laughs in the background. Dean rolls his eyes. "He's lying—well, not really. I do miss...you and wish you would come on the road with us, because this is important business..."

Sam rolls his eyes, "Nice, dude..." he whispers with sarcasm. "Sydney, it's Sam! Hi!"

"Sam says 'hi'." Dean rolls his eyes. "And I say, that we still need your help."

"It would be appreciated." Sam voices. "I can't handle Dean's stupid ideas on my own."

"What?! That washable dryer was a good idea!"

Five Weeks Later...

"Hey, so, you haven't called me back." Dean sighs. "So, I'm guessing you're not gonna help me." He taps his fingers against the table. "You didn't even bother calling me back to tell me."

Dean shakes his head and scoffs, his anger growing. "Did everything we go through mean nothing to you? And if the reason you chose not to help or call me back is because of what happened...I-I'm sorry, Syd. But you've gotta get over it. It was years ago and we were kids."

"I was a dumb kid and people break up over letters all the time!"

Sam snorts, "No, they don't."

"Sammy," Dean warns.

Sam rolls his eyes and leaves the room. Dean exhales a sharp breath. "I just, okay, what I did was shitty, but...I just thought you were better than me, Syddie."

Dean swipes his tongue across his lip and a lump forms in his throat. He clears his throat and wipes his eyes. "Yeah, you know what? Fine. You don't have to worry about me calling you again, okay? I'm done."

40 Weeks Later...

"B-Bobby?"

"Hey, kid..."

"What's up?"

"I know we haven't talked in a while. So, me calling you might be a shock but, there's been an accident and..."

"Kid, it's Dean. He's not doing too good."

☆

Sneakers squeaked against the white tiled floor. Sydney sprints down the hall, already knowing the room number she was supposed to go to. Nurses and receptionists yell at her to stop, but their screams fall on deaf ears. Sydney's breathing was quick and her heartbeat was pounding through her ears. She could hardly hear herself think, which was great for her.

Sydney's eyes scan each room number on the hospital doors. Her vision starts to grow darker and she starts to feel herself panic, not being able to find the room. "Shit, shit, shit—"

"Sydney?"

The girl stops by the voice. Sydney turns around and she pulls her brows together when she sees a tall boy staring at her. Her brown eyes stay on the boy and she slightly moves her head to the side.

"Uh, I'm sorry...who are you?"

The boy raises his brows, "Right. It's been that long, huh?" He manages a chuckle.

Sydney's knitted brows soon raise and her mouth hangs open. "Sam?"

Sam holds his arms out. Sydney's eyes fill with tears, she runs toward him and jumps into his arms. She wraps her arms around Sam's and laughs softly. "Oh, My God..."

Sam wraps his arms around Sydney's waist, comforted by her warm embrace. After these last hours of holding himself together trying to find a way to help Dean, a hug from Sydney was exactly what he needed. She always gave the best hugs.

"You've gotten tall!" Sydney pulls away from the hug and grips his arms.

"And you're...the same." Sam smiles.

The brunette's hair was still straight but it was now long enough to almost touch her lower back. She was wearing a light-washed denim jacket with a cotton navy blue tank top, paired with dark blue denim bell bottoms. And she had on black Chuck Taylor's. Sam couldn't help but smile at the shoes. She always wore them except for on hunts. She would trade them in for black combat boots.

Sydney presses her lips together. "Well, I guess I'll take it." She lightly shoves him back. Her face then saddens when she looks across his bruised face. "How's your dad?"

"Uh, he's not awake, but Dean..." Sam shakes his head.

Sydney presses her lips into a small line and squeezes his arm. Sam looks into Dean's room. Sydney hesitates, she hasn't seen Dean in years and she's going to see him hurt. She inhales a small breath and turns her head. Sydney's stomach turns and a small gasp leaves her lips. Dean had tubes running in and out of him.

Sam and Sydney walk into Dean's room. Sydney's eyes stay on Dean's weak and cut body. She feels her throat tighten, thinking about all the calls Dean has made to her this past year. And she chose not to answer. Would this have happened if she picked up the phone?

"It looks bad, right?" Sam sniffles. "Do you think it's bad?"

Sydney slowly shakes her head. "I...I don't know." She looks at Sam and sees him on the verge of tears. Sydney's chest tightens and a lump forms in her throat. "Oh, Sammy." She wraps her arms around his neck. Sam stays frozen for a moment, not hugging her back. "We're gonna hear what the doctor has to say and go from there, okay?"

Sam soon relaxes in Sydney's arms and he hugs her back. Even though the two haven't seen each other in years it still felt like old times. Sydney reassured him everything was going to be okay. She was always someone he could go to for advice. Sydney was one of the people he called asking for advice about going to Stanford when he got the acceptance letter.

Her exact words were, "You better haul ass to California. I'll help you pack!"

She was always so supportive.

"Thanks, Syd." Sam chuckles. "You always know what to say."

Sydney manages a small smile, "Yeah, I don't know about that..." She pulls away from the hug and folds her arms.

"Mr. Winchester?"

Sydney and Sam turn to the doctor who just entered the room. The brunette's back straightens.

"Your father's awake." The doctor informs. "You can go see him if you like."

Sam looks back at Dean, "Doc, what about my brother?"

"Well, he sustained serious injury—blood loss, contusions to his liver and kidney." The doctor explains.

Sydney chews on the inside of her cheek and looks at Dean's body.

"But it's the head trauma I'm worried about." The doctor continues. "It's early signs of Cerebral Edema."

Sydney holds her breath.

"Well, what can we do?" Sam asks.

"Well, we won't know his full condition until he wakes up." The doctor states.

Sydney slips her hands into her back pockets. "Do you know...how long he could be unconscious?"

The doctor looks at the girl and just from his expression, she can tell that he isn't sure if Dean would even wake up.

"Oh..." Sydney feels like she's lost all the air in her lungs.

"I have to be honest. Most people with his degree of injury wouldn't have survived this long. He's fighting very hard." The doctor explains. "But, you two need to have realistic expectations."

Sydney looks over at Sam to see him staring off into space with his eyes glazed over with disbelief. The girl wasn't used to taking charge, but at this moment she had to.

Sydney looks at the doctor and softly smiles, "Thank you, doctor."

The doctor gives them a sympathetic smile before leaving the room. Sydney turns to Sam, "Hey..."

Sam blinks and looks at her. Sydney slightly opens her mouth, "You should go see your dad." She motions her head over to the door.

Sam hesitates, "I don't know..."

"I'll stay here with Dean. Don't worry." Sydney gives him a small shrug. Sam shifts his eyes back to Dean's body and then looks back at Sydney.

A grateful smile forms on Sam's lips.

"Thanks, Syd." He gently touches her arm. Sydney softly smiles at Sam and watches him leave the room. As soon as Sam disappears down the hall, Sydney's smile wavers. Her body felt like it had gone numb. She looks back at Dean's body and her eyes well with tears.

"Oh, God..." Sydney whispers as she rounds the bed. She quickly makes her way over to Dean's beside and exhales sharply. Sydney sits in the chair and looks across Dean's cut and bruised face.

"I can't believe this is how I'm seeing you again after 6 years." Sydney wipes at her eyes. "I'm probably the last person you want to see, right now."

Sydney lets out a huff and slightly shakes her head. "I know I would be the last person I'd wanna see. If that makes sense."

Silence settles into the room and Sydney keeps her teary eyes on Dean's face. "Sam and I are gonna figure something out." She instinctively reaches for Dean's hand. Before her hand can touch him, she stops. Sydney hesitates for a moment. She didn't have the right to hold his hand. Even if he wasn't conscious. Sydney curls her hand into a fist and pulls it back.

"I promise, we'll help you."

☆

"Oh, man..."

Sydney and Sam stand beside Bobby, all of their eyes glued to the totaled Impala. The brunette hadn't seen this car in years. And seeing it in the state that it was currently disheartening her.

"Dean is gonna be pissed."

Sydney softly exhales a breath and raises her brows in agreement. They all walk closer to the vehicle.

"Look, Sam, this—this just ain't worth a tow." Bobby starts.

Sydney tenses. From what she remembered this car was important to the Winchesters. So, even if they had scraps left. They sure as hell were gonna keep it.

"I say we empty the trunk and sell the rest for scrap."

Sam pulls his broken laptop from the car. "No. Dean would kill me if we did that."

"I-I'm sure he's gonna want to fix it when he wakes up, right?" Sydney shrugs.

"There's nothing to fix." Bobby voices. "The frame's a pretzel. The engine's ruined. There's barely any parts worth salvaging."

"Bobby..."

Bobby looks over at the brunette and she shifts her eyes to Sam, telling him to ease up.

"Listen to me, Bobby...if there's only one working part, that's enough. We're not just gonna give up on..." Sam trails off his words. Even though, he was talking about the car; Bobby and Sydney knew he was referring to Dean's critical state. He wasn't going to give up on helping Dean wake up.

"Okay." Bobby nods his head. "You got it."

Sam sniffles, wanting to draw the attention away from himself; he pulls out the paper John gave him. "Here, uh... Dad asked me if you could get this stuff for him." He hands the paper to Bobby.

Sydney had been standing beside Bobby, so she looked at the paper. She pulls her brows together from the ingredients.

"What John want with this?" Bobby asks.

"Protection from the demon."

Sydney raises her brows. She and Bobby exchange a knowing look. Sam reads their troubled expressions. "What?"

"N-Nothing," Bobby says. "It's just..." he looks back at Sydney and she nervously bites the inside of her cheek.

"Guys, what's going on?" Sam asks.

Sydney inhales a breath and looks back at Sam. "Sammy, these ingredients? They're not for protection from a demon...it's to summon one."

Sam's jaw goes slack, but it quickly clenches. "What?"

Sydney lets out a small breath. This is going to be a long drive back...

Sam had quickly made his way back to the car when Bobby pulled Sydney aside. Sydney's eyes were glued to the dirt road. She didn't have the courage to look Bobby in the eye. She didn't even have the courage to explain where she's been.

Bobby knew that she wasn't going to explain. He could tell from the way her hands were shaking. "You talk to Laura yet?"

Sydney's eyes begin to burn. She gnaws on her lower lip and shakes her head. "No." She softly speaks. "Have you?"

Bobby softly chuckles, "Of course, I have. I haven't stopped."

Sydney nods her head. She finally looks at Bobby and gives him a pained smile with guilt stinging at her eyes. "That's good."

"Kid—"

"I'm sorry." Sydney chokes out. She pinches the bridge of her nose. "I know you and her have been worried. And it's unforgivable that I haven't kept in contact."

A huff escapes Bobby's mouth. "You've got that right."

Sydney begins to chew at the raw skin inside of her cheek.

"You should be lucky Laura and I are so forgiving." Bobby jokes.

Sydney's shoulders sag. Her lower lip quivers and she feels like she can't breathe. She never understands how those two can forgive her so easily.

"Thanks, Bobby."

Bobby rolls his eyes. "Yeah, yeah. Get over here."

Sydney forces out a soft laugh mixed with a shaky breath. She walks over to Bobby and hugs him. Bobby touches the back of the girl's head, pulling her into a warm embrace. "When this is all over. You come back here with an explanation on where you've been."

Sydney swallows the painful lump in her throat but she slowly nods her head. "Yes, sir."

...

Turns out Sydney was wrong. It was a quick drive back, mostly because of Sam's angry speeding. As soon as they got back to the hospital, Sydney had to try her best to keep up with Sam as he stalked down the halls. She was quiet the entire way except for her quick breathing while trying to keep up with Sam's pace. Sydney knew she hasn't hunted in a while, but damn.

Was she really this out of shape?

Sam gets to John's room. He walks in and drops the bag onto a chair, his body language filled with anger. Sydney stays in the doorway, not entirely feeling comfortable with interrupting.

"You think I wouldn't find out?" Sam snaps.

"What are you talking abou—"

"That stuff from Bobby—you don't use it to ward off a demon—you use it to summon one!" Sam scoffs. "You're planning on bringing the demon here, aren't you? Having some stupid macho showdown."

"I have a plan, Sam," John replies.

"That's exactly my point!" Sam barks. "Dean is dying and you have a plan! You know what, you care more about killing this demon than you do saving your own son!"

Sydney slightly opens her mouth. "Guys, we shouldn't do this right—"

"Do not tell me how I feel. I am doing this for Dean." John snaps.

"How? How is revenge gonna help him?" Sam continues to raise his voice. "You're not thinking about anybody but yourself. It's the same selfish obsession!"

"That's funny. You know what, I thought this was your obsession, too!"

"This demon killed your mother, killed your girlfriend..."

"And I am just going to shut the door." Sydney softly speaks, and she shuts the room door. How the hell were they just going to yell about demons in public like this? After all the hard work hunters do in order to keep the Supernatural world a secret.

"...you begged me to be part of this hunt! Now, if you killed that damn thing when you had the chance, none of this would have happened."

"It was a car crash..." Sydney speaks.

"It was possessing you. I would have killed you, too." Sam says.

"Yeah, and your brother would be awake right now!" John shouts.

Sydney pinches the bridge of her nose. "Oh, god..."

Sam looks at his father in disbelief. "Go to Hell."

"I should have never taken you along in the first place—I knew it was a mistake—"

Suddenly the glass of water on the stand beside John's bed fell to the ground, shattering. The three all look at the water. Sydney raises her brows, "Saved by the glass of water."

Chatter is heard outside, catching Sydney's attention. The brunette pulls the door open, she sees Nurses and Doctors running down the hall. Sydney's voice gets caught in her throat.

"Something's going on out there." John voices. He motions his head for Sam to go. Sam sprints out of the room, and Sydney goes to follow.

"Syd!"

The girl stops and turns to John. He gives her a nod, "It's good to see you again."

Sydney chuckles, "It's good seeing you too, John." She presses her lips into a timid smile. Sydney then quickly follows after Sam. As she runs down the hall, she catches sight of Sam standing in the doorway of Dean's room.

"Sam? What's..." Sydney felt all the air in her lungs give out. Dean was flatlining and the nurses were trying their best to resuscitate him. "Oh, my god..."

Sam's entire body was trembling as he watched Dean's body stay limp, unable to be resuscitated. Sydney's eyes dart around each nurse, hoping that they were able to bring Dean back.

Suddenly, a voice echoes through Sydney and Sam's ears causing both of their skin to crawl. The EKG monitor begins to beep rhythmically again.

"We have a pulse. We're back into sinus rhythm."

Sydney lets out a heavy breath of relief. Sam looks down the hall, "I have an idea..."

Sydney snaps her eyes over to Sam, she then raises her brows. "O-Okay, what is it?"

"Follow me." Sam suddenly starts walking down the hall, leaving Sydney in the dust. She slightly opens her mouth, "Oh. Okay." the brunette jogs after Sam.

☆

Sydney and Sam were both at the convenience store. They had gotten a Ouija board from an occult store earlier. The brunette had urged Sam to get something to eat, but he had told her he was "fine". Sydney wasn't someone who pushed others, but she also knew that Sam hadn't eaten anything since she'd been here. So, they made a compromise to just grab a bag of chips for the two to share.

"So...you ever used a Ouija board before?" Sydney asks.

Sam's hands were stuffed in his front jeans pockets and his eyes were on the ground. "No. You?"

Sydney presses her lips together and shakes her head. "But, it's worth a shot, right?"

Sam softly chuckles, "It's not like I have any other ideas."

The brunette looks at Sam and her eyes soften. "It's a...good idea."

Sam looks at Sydney and this time he laughs. "That wasn't too convincing."

Her mouth slightly opens, "Yeah, well...did it make you feel better? At all?"

Sam rolls his lips into his mouth, he pinches his fingers together; telling her it helped a little. Sydney then smiles. The two continue down the aisles in silence with an 800-pound elephant in the room.

"You know what I'm gonna ask, right?" Sam glances at her.

Sydney inhales, "Yeah...just waiting."

"Your life outside of hunting," Sam says. "You had to have had one, right?"

"That's the reason you weren't answering Dean's calls."

Sydney's chest tightens. She turns away from Sam and looks at the chip bags. "Do you like barbecue?"

"But, you're here now." Sam watches as Sydney continues to brush him off. Sydney softly speaks, "I like salt and vinegar--you like salt and vinegar?"

"Syd."

The brunette stops lets out a breath, and turns to Sam. Her eyes were small but Sam could tell that she had so much to say. Sydney had so much she wanted to explain, but then she heard that familiar voice that had told her how unimportant she was.

No one would care.

Sydney inhales a breath, "Sam, the life that I had was good." she nods her head. "I was...happy."

"Was?" Sam's voice was soft. He watches as Sydney's eyes grow glassy. The brunette gives Sam a small nod. "Was," she confirms. "Hunters aren't meant to be happy...that's what they say, right?"

"Syd--"

"It's okay." Sydney chuckles. "What kind of chips do you want?" she points out. "Seriously, you need to eat something. Even if it's small."

Sam wraps his arms around Sydney and pulls her into a warm embrace. Sydney softly gasps. She had forgotten what it was like for a hug to be out of love instead of intimidation. Sydney wraps her arms around Sam's middle and tears blur her vision.

"I'm glad you're back." Sam softly speaks.

Sydney's lips quiver. It was hard for people to ever hear Sydney speak with her soft-spoken tone, and it was even harder to speak when she was on the verge of crying. But, whether it was now or 10 years ago, Sam always heard her. Which is why he could hear her when she softly replied "I'm glad I'm back too."

...

"Hey. I think maybe you're around."

Sydney was leaning against the shelf, her eyes on the brothers.

"And if you are, don't make fun of me for this, but, um...there's one way we can talk." Sam pulls the Ouija board from the paper bag he was holding. A small smirk forms on Sydney's lips, she could just hear Dean saying something quippy just from the board being pulled out. Then her smile got sad. A guilt pools in her stomach from her thoughts. Why was she acting like she knew him so well? It's been 6 years.

They needed you and you abandoned them.

Sam sits on the hospital floor with the board set up. He shifts his gaze to Sydney and she presses her lips into a small smile. The Winchester boy raises his brows, "You want to join?"

Sydney slightly opens her mouth. "Oh...are you sure?" She nervously shifts.

Sam smiles through his cuts and bruises. "Yeah, I'm sure, Syd."

The brunette softly lets out a breath through her nose. She cautiously walks across the room and sits next to Sam. Sam can see how timid and anxious she is. It makes his stomach clench from how different Sydney is. He knows it's been a long time since they've last seen each other, but...

She seemed like a completely different person.

Sydney's fingertips lightly touch the other side of the wooden planchette. She lifts her gaze and meets Sam's eyes. The brunette gives him a soft nod and Sam exhales. "Dean..." his voice was shaky. Sam quickly clears his throat and tries to speak again. "Dean, are you here?"

Sydney and Sam wait in silence, both anxious for any hint of Dean being in the room with them. Suddenly the planchette begins to slide across the board. Sydney's eyes widen and she lets out a small breath. "Holy shit..."

Sam softly chuckles when the planchette lands on 'Yes'. "Oh, it's good to hear from you, man. It hasn't been the same without you, Dean."

Sydney bites the inside of her cheek from the shakiness in Sam's tone. She had sympathy for Sam, having to be here with John this entire time while worrying about Dean. John wasn't the easiest to get along with and Sydney recognized that from the couple of times she's met him in her hunting past.

The planchette begins to move again and Sydney pulls her brows together.

"Dean, what?"

H-U-N-T

"Hunt?" Sam shakes his head. "What? Hunting? Are you hunting?"

'Yes'

"What are you hunting?" Sydney softly speaks. Should she even speak right now?

The planchette begins to move once again.

R-E-A-P

Sydney sucks in a breath and holds it.

"Dean," Sam starts. "is it after you?"

'Yes'

Sydney feels her stomach painfully twist. Sam shifts and he lets out a desperate breath. "If it's here naturally, there's no way to stop it."

Sydney glances at Sam.

"Man, you're, uh..." Sam trails off his pessimistic words. He then shakes his head. "No, no. There's got to be a way." He stands up. "There's got to be a way."

Sydney stands up along with Sam. "Maybe your dad knows a way." She softly suggests.

Sam looks at Sydney and nods his head. "Yeah, you're right. Uh...I'll go check on him. See what he knows."

Sydney gives Sam a soft smile. "And Sam?"

San looks at Sydney. She slightly raises her brows. "If he pushes your buttons—"

"I'll be the bigger man." Sam finishes. Sydney then gives him a small nod.

"Thanks, Syd."

Sydney gives him a small smile as he rushes out of the room.

The brunette then lets out a trembling breath and her hand begins to shake. She painfully grips her hand to keep it from shaking. Her stomach had been turning all day, but she hadn't had a chance to actually deal with it. Those pills she took earlier must've been affecting her. Shit.

Sydney takes a seat in the chair in the corner of the Dean's room. She takes another breath and looks up at the ceiling. The brunette figured that being here would've helped take her mind off of what happened.

But if anything it started stirring shit up for her. It makes sense. Everyone was curious about where she was and what she had been doing in all the years she disappeared off the face of the planet. It was bound to have unwanted memories and guilt stirred up. Sydney could feel her heart begin to beat faster from the guilt that was filling her lungs. God, was she even breathing right now?

Her fingers tangle into her straight brown hair and she lightly tugs at it.

It's all your fault.

The voice had berated that message into her over the past few years. She wishes that she could just have her own voice reassure herself that it wasn't true. But even Sydney started to believe it over the course of these years.

Maybe it was true.

"I'm really sorry." Sydney lets out a small whimper. "About everything."

Her eyes shift to Dean's lifeless body and her shoulders sag. Sydney didn't even know who she was apologizing to.

The door swings open and Sydney quickly regains control over her emotions. Sydney wipes her eyes and looks at the pissed-off Sam Winchester. "What'd your dad say?"

Sam softly scoffs, "He wasn't there."

Sydney pulls her brows together. "What? So, he just took off?" She stands up from her seat.

"Apparently."

Sydney watches as Sam opens up John's journal. The brunette nervously gnaws on her lower lip. "Did you want to go look for him?"

"Forget it. He probably wouldn't even want to help anyway." Sam's tone was sharp.

Sydney sucks in a breath and holds it. Nothing she was saying seemed to be helping in any kind of way. So, she decides to stay silent and take a step closer to the bed. Sam sits on the edge of the bed, "Maybe there might be something in here."

Sydney wipes her lower lip and she looks over Sam's shoulder at the Reaper chapter John had written. The brunette pulls her brows together from the words. "I...this seems like stuff we already know about Reapers."

Sam lets out a sharp breath. He had come to the same conclusion as Sydney. Sam flips another page. Then another. Then another.

"Are you fucking kidding me?" Sam slams the journal shut. Sydney's entire body flinches and she instinctively takes a small step back. Sam sets the book on the side table with his breathing quickening. Sydney closes her eyes and softly whispers to herself to calm herself down. Everything's okay. You're safe.

Sydney opens her eyes again, her teary gaze meeting Dean's body. "Sammy..."

Sam stays silent, his gears are still turning. He wasn't going to give up on Dean—of course he wasn't. Sydney just wished she knew how to help.

Sydney swallows the lump that was painfully stuck in her throat. "I'll go get you some water." She gives him a soft squeeze on his shoulder before leaving the room.

Sydney walks down the hall with her eyes glued to the ground and her hands stuffed into her jacket pockets. Once she got to the coffee and water dispenser, she watched the water fill the cup up while tears burned in her vision. The brunette couldn't think of anything to help Dean. She felt useless.

"God, why did I even come here?" Sydney covers her face and sniffles. Someone brushes past Sydney and she turns her head to the doctor rushing down the hall. The brunette keeps her eyes on the doctor for a moment before looking back at the water filling the cup.

Sydney didn't think anything of the doctor. Maybe he had another patient to help. Then she heard Sam screaming for help. She had completely abandoned the cup of water in the dispenser and sprinted down the hall.

The worst-case scenario had popped into her head. Dean was dead and she left Sam alone to deal with it. Sydney let out soft shaky 'no, no, no...' while rushing down the hall. She wasn't going to be able to explain to Dean what happened. Why she had lost contact. There was so much she wanted to explain.

The room came into her view. Sydney quickly stops in the doorway, "Sam! What's going on? Is Dean..."

Sam's eyes were filled with tears as he stood on the side of Dean's bed. But he had a smile on his lips. That could only mean...

Sydney finally looks at the bed to see Dean awake. The doctor had been talking to him for the last few minutes, hoping to get some understanding himself on how he was alive and well.

Dean then turns his head and his eyes meet Sydney's. Their breathing simultaneously halted. As if they were breathing into one another. A smile of relief was on her lips and tears were welled in her eyes. But that smile soon fell once she saw all the blood fall from Dean's face.

Dean's eyes never left hers. This couldn't be real. How was she here? The freckles across her face were still the same. And She still had the same brown doe eyes. The bags under them were darker than he'd ever seen them. And she has never looked more beautiful.

"Syddie?"

Sydney's heart clenches. God, she hasn't heard that name in so long. And she presses her lips into a small smile. "Hey." She takes a small and cautious step into the room. Sydney could never get over Dean's eyes. God, those forest greens would make anyone forget their own name. Sydney motions toward him, "How are you...well, no." She swallows. "That's dumb to ask—You just woke up from a coma. I know how you're doing."

Sam could feel the sudden shock of seeing each other wash away. Now the room was filled with anger and awkward tension. He needed to do something fast.

Sam clears his throat, "Well, actually. The doctor just told us that he was...okay."

Sydney shifts her gaze to Sam. "Wait, like, 'good' okay?"

Sam nods. His smile never left his lips. "Like 100%—ready to jump back into action."

Sydney looks back at Dean, whose eyes were still on her. The brunette finally took a moment to look across his face and he genuinely looked healthy. He still had a cut across his forehead, but he wasn't in hopeless condition. Dean was going to heal and get better. Sydney knew it had to be something supernatural. But she couldn't ask about it in front of the doctor. So, she softly smiles. "That's amazing."

The doctor inhales a breath, "I'll give you guys a moment." He gives Dean a nod. "I'm glad that you're okay."

"Thanks, Doc." Dean finally tears his eyes off the girl. Even though his eyes were off her, Sydney still felt tense. This conversation was going to happen sooner or later. Sydney was going to be sick.

Dean shifts his eyes to Sam. "You said a reaper was after me?"

Sam nods, "Yeah."

"How'd I ditch it?"

"You got me." Sam chuckles, but he ends up pulling his brows together. "Dean, you really don't remember anything?"

"No..." Dean's eyes fall onto the wall. "I just have this pit in my stomach. Sam, something's wrong."

Sydney's back straightens and she exchanges a look of worry with Sam. Just from the way Dean spoke, they could tell how serious he felt about this. A soft knock is heard at the door, catching the threes attention. Sydney turns her head to John and she gave him a small smile.

"How you feeling, dude?"

"Fine, I guess." Dean answers with uncertainty. "I'm alive."

"That's what matters." John gives him a small smile.

"Where were you last night?"

Sydney shifts her gaze to Sam. The brunette inhales a breath. She didn't want to be standing directly between Sam and John's line of sight when they argue. So, the girl walks across the room and sits in the chair. John looks at Sam, "I had some things to take care of."

A sarcastic frown forms on Sam's face. "Well, that's specific."

"C'mon, Sam." Dean sighs.

"Did you go after the demon?" Sam questions.

"No."

Sam then scoffs, "You know, why don't I believe you right now?"

Sydney has experienced her fair share of Winchester arguments over the years she's known them.

So, the girl had sinks deeper into her chair when John steps further into the room. She readies herself for some loud bite back from John. And so did Dean.

But they were both shocked when they received anything but.

"Can we not fight?"

The three young hunters freeze.

"You know, half the time we're fighting, I don't know what we're fighting about." John softly admits. "Just butting heads."

"Look, Sammy, I've...I've made some mistakes. But I've always done the best I could."

Sydney continues to shift her gaze from Sam and John. She was beyond stunned about what she was hearing.

"I just don't want to fight anymore, okay?" John softly speaks.

Sydney squints her eyes and she could've sworn she saw John Winchester's lower lip quiver. Sam shifts, "Dad, are you all right?"

John softly smiles, "Yeah. Yeah, I'm just a little tired." He clears his throat. "Hey, Sam, would you mind uh—would you mind getting me a cup of caffeine?"

Sam hesitantly nods his head—still trying to understand what he just heard his father say. "Yeah. Yeah, sure." He glances at Dean before he walks out of the room.

Dean notices the look of anguish across his father's face. "What is it?"

Instead of answering the question, John turns the conversation toward something else. "You know, when you were a kid, I'd come home from a hunt, and after what I'd seen, I'd be—I'd be wrecked. And you—you'd come up to me, and you'd put your hand on my shoulder, and you'd look me dead in the eye, and you'd...you'd say "It's okay, dad"."

Sydney really wishes she went with Sam to get coffee.

"Dean...I'm sorry." John shakily whispers.

"Why?"

"You shouldn't have had to say that to me. I should've been saying that to you." John admits. "You know, I put...I put too much on your shoulders. I made you grow up too fast. You took care of Sammy—you took care of me. You did that."

"And you didn't complain—not once."

Dean feels weird getting all this recognition. He's dreamt of it for years, but now that it's finally here. What was the end goal?

"I just want you to know...that I am so proud of you."

Dean hesitates for a moment before he speaks. "Is this really you talking?"

John chuckles, "Yeah. Yeah, it's really me."

"Why are you saying this stuff?" Dean asks, his eyes never left his father's.

John walks closer to Dean and grips his shoulder. "I want you to watch out for Sammy, okay?"

Dean scrunches his brows together and that pit that had been in his stomach earlier begins to grow. "Yeah, dad, you know I will." He shakily answers. "You're scaring me."

"Don't be scared, Dean." John gives him a reassuring smile.

Sydney pulls her brows together as John whispers to Dean. Dean's eyes widen from the information his father gave him. He looks at his dad, but all John does is give him a small nod—confirming that what he had said was true.

John then walks over to the girl, "Try to stay together this time, huh?" He gently takes the girl's hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze. Sydney pulls her brows together.

"I know you and Dean have shit to work through, but I need you guys to stay together, okay?"

Dean's jaw clenches.

Sydney looks into John's sad eyes and she hesitantly nods. "Of course, but," she hesitates for a moment. It wasn't her business, but he was acting odd. "are you okay, John?"

Dean lets out a breath of relief. At least he wasn't the only one that noticed something was wrong.

John smirks and gives her soft pat on the head. "You're a good kid, Syd. You tell Laura the same."

Sydney gives him a small nod with her brows still pulled together. Her eyes follow him out of the room.

Then it happens.

A heavy silence drowns between the two. Sydney lifts her gaze to Dean. "How are you feeling?" She gains the courage to speak. Then that courage quickly falls through. You already tried to ask that earlier, idiot.

Dean softy huffs, "Pissed off, betrayed--"

"I was asking about how your body was feeling after waking up. But if you want to get to the yelling right now, then--"

"What the hell, Syd?" Dean snaps at her. Her skin slightly jumps from the sudden sharpness. She slams her mouth shut and nervously pushes some of her loose hair behind her ear.

"Dean, I'm sorry I didn't come with you guys. But, I'm here now...isn't that what matters?" She forces out a chuckle.

Dean lets out a chuckle but it's filled with a bitterness that makes Sydney's skin prickle. He then nods his head, "Right, because. You coming after I almost died instead of being here after we couldn't find Dad, after Sam's girlfriend died, after everything we have been through without you..." he trails off his rant and wipes his mouth. Sydney chooses to stay silent which causes Dean to scoff.

"The only reason you came here today, was so you could take some credit for being here when I died. Just a story you could tell the other hunters, when in reality, you abandoned us--"

That's when Sydney quickly stands up. "I didn't..." she closes her mouth and scratches above her brow. Dean watches as Sydney places her hands on her hips, trying to keep control over her emotions. But the thing was, Dean wanted her to shout. He wanted them both to have this long awaited argument.

Sydney walks over to Dean's bedside. The boy tenses from the close proximity. He never thought he would be this close to her ever again. Even though his body felt something completely different, he still keeps his cold and distant expression.

"I didn't abandon you guys." Sydney whispers. "Or at least, I didn't mean to. I had a life, Dean and...I couldn't just drop everything and leave." She explains while she lightly touches her bare ring finger.

Dean doesn't budge. He just shakes his head. "So, what, you're telling me that you can do that now?" He questions with anger lacing his voice.

"Yeah, I am." She snaps back at him. Her gut turns and fear creeps through her body. She doesn't even remember the last time she snapped back at someone. Sydney hated to admit that she was waiting for some form of punishment for doing so. But all that came was Dean's cold look of betrayal. Sydney was 100% sure that was far worse.

The brunette inhales and quickly exhales. She sits in the chair at Dean's bedside and tangles her hands in her hair. She keeps her eyes on the ground as her tears fall on the hospital tiles.

Hurried footsteps are heard throughout the hall and they skid to a stop.

"It's dad." Sam quickly chokes out. Sydney snaps her head up at the youngest Winchester. Sam quickly pulls the blankets off of Dean. Sydney stands up and helps Dean out of the bed as well.

"What's going on, Sam?" Dean asks.

"I found him on the floor, he...he wasn't breathing, Dean." Sam says.

Sydney's her jaw instinctively tightens. The three hunters quickly head down the hall way and into John's room. But one of the doctors stands in front of them, "We need some space--"

"That's our dad—That's our dad!" Dean's voice booms. Sydney holds Dean's arm over her shoulder as Sam does the same thing. Sydney could feel her heart continue to bang against her chest with anxiety.

They all watch as the doctor continued CPR on John. He had been doing it far before the three came to the room. The flatline sound floods each person's ears.

The doctor then reluctantly pulls his hands away from John's chest. A small breath escapes Sydney's lips and she quickly covers her mouth.

"Alright, let's call it." The doctor glances at the clock and turns the EKG monitor off. "Time of death 10:41 am."

Sydney has never felt Dean's body go so weak.

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author's note.

First chapter DONEEEE

I am so excited for this rewrite. But I do have to say this again for people who have read the original before. I deleted this story off of all platforms and the only thing I have to go off of it are some notes i made about this fic YEARSSS ago. So, there might be some information or even plot points missing. If I do miss something and you remember, I would love to hear it <333

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