#Awwwwkkk-waaarddd

"That awkward moment when you're the only one who feel awkward."

-x-

Sa dami ng pwedeng i-describe kay Jhing, mas tatanggapin niya ang 'prude' kaysa 'asumera.' Sa katunayan, madalas sa buhay niya, go with the flow siya. Kahit marami siyang gustong gawin, abutin, go with the flow lang siya – not assuming things. Not trying to expect a lot.

Assuming hurts, and hurting was what she wanted to avoid.

Not that she'll be hurt by him, right? Riiight?

But it doesn't make sense! Si Miko? Magtatrabaho sa publishing company na pinagtatrabahuhan niya para sa kanya? Sus. Baka nagkataon lang.

Oo tama, nagkataon lang.

However, when her right foot stepped on the 7th floor lobby, halos mapatakbo siya pabalik ng elevator nang marinig ang pamilyar na boses.

"Hi Jhing."

Hindi na niya kailangan lumingon para malamang si Miko 'yun, nakatambay sa pulang sofa, right ankle on top of his left knee, kumukuyakoy pa. Still, lumingon si Jhing. . .and wrong move.

She saw his lopsided smile.

Hindi. . .hindi siya ang hinihintay ng lalaking 'yon. Mahilig lang talaga 'yon tumambay.

Bago pa may kung anong maganap na ayaw mangyari ni Jhing, hinigpitan niya ang hawak sa ID lace at dumiretso sa loob ng office. She tapped her ID para makapag-time in. Not minding Miko, or any other eyes that watched her with a weird look.

Monday morning na Monday morning, dahil binati siya ni Miko sa pantry nung Friday na para bang magkasangga sila since birth, kahit nagpaliwanag na siyang, naalala ko ata siya, nagkabunggo last time, ganun, mukhang hindi naniniwala ang ilan.

Nakakaparanoid, but she didn't show it that much.

And the smile she saw from Miss Mary Zue when their path crossed? Iniisip niyang normal na ngiti lang 'yon at hindi 'I know your secret' look. Not that she has a secret, okay?

. . .okay.

For a few minutes, tulalang nakatitig si Jhing sa screen ng computer. She's contemplating whether what's happening to her was real or just her imagination. Baka naman kasi talaga hang over lang ito dahil sinulat niya ang novella na 'yon.

Hangover? Buong weekend na ang lumipas, ah!

But again, her thoughts of bubbles burst when she heard Miko's voice getting near from the lobby. As if it's her cue, bigla na lang siyang yumuko, akala ay matatago ang sarili sa cubicle, at nagbukas ng emails. Kahit naririnig ang boses ni Miss Zue, ni Miko, nila Facio at ang mga illustration related works explanation, Jhing stared at her emails.

She just. . .stared.

Na para bang nakikipagtitigan siya rito, at ang unang pipikit ay talo.

Ah shit, natatanga na naman siya.

She's not sure kung masyado ba siyang sensitive sa boses ni Miko, o sa mga taong natatawa sa jokes nito, o talagang malakas lang talaga ang boses nila kaya napadesisyunan ni Jhing na mag-earphones. Pinatugtog ang playlist niyang halos mabingi na siya.

Music was better than to hear his voice.

Yup. Better.

Kaya naman kahit magdugo pa ang tainga niya, mas naramdaman niya ang relaxation sa music habang sinisimulan ang pag-eedit sa panibagong manuscript.

For about 30 pages or so; so far, so good.

Not until naging mellow ang kanta, and she heard a voice say her name.

And because she's the paranoid girl she was, bigla na lang siyang kinabahan. Halos mahulog ang phone sa kamay habang naglilipat ng kanta nang may kumalabit sa kanya July got her attention, may announcement ang publisher nila – kaya naman tinanggal niya ang earphones, at lumingon kay Miss Zue.

Which was not really a good idea for her.

Nakapwesto si Jhing sa right side cubicles, kaya humarap siya sa left side, at nagtama ang tingin nila ni Miko na nakaupo sa bago nitong pwesto.

Thankfully, hindi sila magkatapat. He's a few cubicles away, sa dulo, malapit sa kanto, which was unfortunately, dinadaanan nila para makalabas.

That's where July pointed, kung saan nakatayo si Miss Zue malapit sa cubicle ni Miko, nakapatong ang braso rito.

Before Jhing could see Miko's smile again, and shit, he keeps on smiling!, nilipat agad ni Jhing ang tingin kay Miss Zue.

"Pinag-usapan na namin ang gagawin doon sa story na napaka haba ang title, and Jhing, ikaw ang nag-initial edit, di ba?"

Nanlamig agad ang kamay ni Jhing, dahil alam niyang nakatingin sa kanya ang lahat sa book department. Including that guy. At ayaw niya ng feeling na tinititingnan siya nang lahat.

So she nodded.

"Dahil wala na tayong magagawa, nakapirma na yung author, at nabayaran na." Kitang-kita ang disappointment sa mukha ni Miss Zue as she sighed. "Let's just edit it as much as we can to make it book worthy."

Nagtaas ng kamay si July. "Ma'am, eh paano 'yung mga illogical scenes?"

Pinigilan ni Jhing ang pabalik-balik na tingin dahil napapatingin din siya sa pwesto ni Miko. She stared at an empty space beside Miss Zue, at tinitigan ang trashcan sa likuran nito as if it was the most interesting thing to look at.

"What illogical scenes?"

"For example, may nireklamo si Jhing last time." July looked at Jhing and continued. "Di ba gangster 'yung lalaki kaya lang kapag nakikipag away, naka-eyeliner siya. Tapos hindi nakikilala nung babae 'yung lalaki. So parang ang big plot twist ay gangster pala yung lalaki at siya pala ang childhood savior niya?"

Biglang natawa ang ilan sa nakarinig, kahit ang ibang nasa department.

While as for Jhing, nagsisisi kung bakit nga ba sa kanya naibigay ang book project na 'yon? Sa kanya tuloy nakatuon ang lahat.

And she doesn't want to know if that Miko's looking at her, too.

"Nag-eyeliner lang 'yung lalaki, hindi na siya makilala?"

"Baka panda eyeliner naman kasi," an editor said, laughing. "Don't judge."

"O baka naman tulad sa mga make up tutorials, nagdrawing siya ng malaking mata sa eyelids niya na parang anime make up?"

"What?" natatawang sabi ng isa pa. "Gangster tapos may anime eyes na make up?"

Then again, laughter.

"Wow."

Biglang kumabog ang dibdib ni Jhing nang marinig ang boses ni Miko.

Mas lalong naging interesting ang trashcan para sa kanya.

"Kawaii nun, ah," natatawang sabi nito.

Mas lalong lumakas ang tawanan.

Shit, ang interesting talaga ng trashcan.

Pero kitang-kita sa paghimas ni Miss Zue ng noo na kahit natatawa, ay sumasakit na ang ulo.

"Let's edit, or re-write it less damaging para sa pangalan natin and of course, para na rin sa author," Miss Zue said. "But if we can't push her to fix her story's problem, bahala na. Let's just think this will be over after a few months, and we'll be more careful with the stories we're going to get after."

"No more gangsters?" July asked.

"No more gangsters with makeup," Miss Zue said with finality. "Kahit gaano pa kataas ang reads."

"Thank you!" sigaw ni July na tinawanan ng lahat.

Noong hindi pa editor si Jhing sa kumpanya, she didn't know a lot of things. Akala niya noon, the publisher just like the money. Oo, pansin niya, syempre, it's still business – but they still care for the books, the stories, and the authors.

Minsan, author na mismo ang may problema.

The author didn't budge when they asked her to fix the gangster problem na nag-a-eye liner at sa idea na hindi nakilala ng girl 'yung lalaki dahil sa eyeliner thing. 

She simply replied, 'yun po kasi nagustuhan ng readers ko po.....pag pinalitan ko po un parang di ko na sila nirespeto po sa nagustuhan nila??? Sabi po nila un po pinaka plot twist ehhhh..as is na lang po pede?? Thankie!! ^__^v

Respeto her ass.

And Jhing. . .really. . .really. . .want. . .to edit. . . the author's reply!

Kung pupwede lang i-re-write ang buong story, make it logical, eh di sana masaya na lahat. Si Miss Stels na ang namahala for the fact checking.

Buti na lang.

Natahimik muli sila, a few chatters, pero naging seryoso ang lahat.

Jhing was actually surprised that Miko was busy too. Minsan, nagtatanong sa katabing si Facio na co-iilustrator, pero madalas tahimik. Sa trabaho? Not so sure lalo na't nakita niya ang screen nito a few hours after.

It was an accident.

Papunta siyang CR, napalingon siya sa cubicle ni Miko dahil tumawa ito, and she saw him scrolling at 9gag website.

It was not on purpose!

A few hours after, it was already dark outside. Sabog na rin halos lahat ng tao, at ang ilan ay natataranta na dahil may mga deadlines. Jhing was idling, not wanting to go home yet. Kapag umuwi na kasi siya, wala siyang gagawin – and she does not want to face her novella manuscript for a moment.

Lalo na't ang Mikong 'yon ay nakaupo a few cubicles away from her.

Totoo na talaga ito.

Naglaro siya sa facebook ng candy crush when an email popped up.

And her heart wanted to pop out.

An email from MJ Crux.

Jhing looked at Miko with hesitant, but he was not looking at her way. Nakayuko ito kaya hindi niya makita ang mukha. Mas lalo siyang kinabahan, dahil ang subject ay simpleng, Riona Jayne Blanco, Hi!

At ang nakakainis? Yung message.

Hi. :)

Nanliit ang mata niya.

Ayaw niyang mag-assume pero. . .fuck.

Wala talagang magawa ang lalaking 'yon. She ignored the email.

Nag-reply siya sa ibang email ng authors nang maramdaman ang presensya ng tao sa likuran niya. Pinakiramdaman niya ito kung aalis ba o hindi – but after a few seconds na nandoon pa rin sa likuran niya ang tao – inikot niya ang sarili sa computer chair, at nakarinig ng oomph! mula sa taong nasa likuran.

Gusto niya sanang magsisi kung hindi lang si Miko ang natamaan niya.

She just looked at him, lips twitching, as Miko held his stomach, na para bang nasaktan talaga.

"E-Email."

She did not say anything.

What does this guy want? Replyan niya ang email nitong 'hi'? Ng ano Was it his intention to make this workplace his playroom or something? Ano ba talagang gusto ng lalaking ito sa kanya?

"Ano Miko." Lumapit si Miss Vams sa pwesto nila. Napakunot pa ang noo nito nang makitang parang nananakit ang tiyan. "Anong nangyari sa tiyan mo?"

Jhing did not even flinch.

Umiling si Miko, even tried to smile na naging ngiwi.

"Anyway, ano Jhing? Binigay mo na ba kay Miko?"

Nagtaka si Jhing. "Po?"

"The manuscript."

"Manuscript?" Napatingin si Jhing sa ineedit kanina na manuscript. Why would she give it to Miko? Editor na rin ba ang lalaking 'to? "Kailangan ko ba—"

"Yes. Kasi siya ang mag iillustrate."

Napatango si Jhing, still unsure.

Sa ilang buwan niya sa kumpanya, alam niyang ang cover ay mabilisang ginagawa para makatapos – but not this early. Nasa initial editing pa lang naman siya pero bakit hinihingi na agad ang manuscript?

"Okay po, isesend ko sa email niya." Tiningnan ni Jhing si Miko. Medyo kinakabahan pa rin siya sa tingin ng lalaki, but not too much. Gusto nga niyang matawa dahil nakahawak pa rin ito sa tiyan.

"Good. Para makapagsimula na rin agad tayo sa novella mo."

Wait. . .what?

"Po?"

"Your novella," Miss Vams said. "The manuscript?"

Ang puso niya. . .

"Ano pong—"

"Miko, di mo ba hiningi sa kanya 'yung novella? Kailangan mong basahin 'yun para you get the gist of what to illustrate."

. . . sumabog na ang puso niya.

"Oo nga, eh hindi naman siya nag-reply kaya lumapit na ako."

Jhing's eyes widened. So that was the purpose of that weird 'hi'?! Gusto niyang magreklamo. Eh bakit HI lang kasi nalagay?!

But. . .but. . .the novella? Miko will read. . .the novella. . .she wrote?

"Ha?" bigla na lang niyang sabi kaya nabigla ang dalawang nakatayo sa harap niya. Her neck started aching from looking at the both of them, but that was the least of her worries for now. Her novella? To be read by. . .him?! "Bakit siya?!"

If Miko was offended, he did not show it.

"Ako, eh," he said with a smile. "Unfortunately?"

Jhing want to run and hide in a cave or something.

"Miss Vams, bakit hindi si Facio—"

"Naghati sila ng trabaho, and Facio has a lot of work to do. Si Miko ang gagawa ng kalahati—"

"Hindi pwede—"

Tiningnan siya ni Miss Vams nang nagtataka.

Her heart was pounding and it's not helping her a lot.

"I mean, hindi pa—hindi pa ako tapos," Jhing said. Mabilis niyang tiningnan si Miko sa gilid ng mata, nakatingin lang ito sa kanya. Halos pangiti na. "Aayusin ko pa ang ending. Di ba, pinapaayos niyo 'yun?"

Miss Vam's face brightened, it was horror for Jhing.

"You mean magkakahappy ending na? Magkakatuluyan na silang dal—"

Jhing cut Miss Vams when she stood up and almost shoted, "Ah!" na kinabigla nang ilan. Gusto niyang mahimatay na lang bigla nang makitang nakangiti si Miko sa gilid niya, hands on his pocket.

Mas weirded look ang nakita ni Jhing sa mukha ni Vams.

"H-Hindi ko pa sigurado," Jhing said. Naupo siya bigla, sinave ang mga dapat i-save at nag shut down. Kinuha niya ang bag, nagmamadali kaya halos tumuba ang baso ng pens sa table. "Aalis na ako." Tiningnan niya ang screen ng phone, tila nagmamadali.

"Wait Jhing—"

Lumayo siya, hands were cold. Lumingon siya kanila Miss Vams na nakatayo pa rin malapit sa cubicle niya. "Huwag niyong babasahin!" she shouted. "Bye!"

Nagmadali siya patungo sa hintayan ng elevator. She pushed the down button repeatedly. Her head was spinning, and her heart was pounding as she thought: Pathetic, Jhing. Pathetic.

Pagbukas at pagpasok sa elevator, she pushed the close button. She does not want Miko to be with her on the elevator, no. Halos masira niya ang button nang marinig niya ang boses ni Miko na sumigaw ng, "elevator!"

But when Miko ran towards the elevator, he did not try to open the door when they saw each other. He simply stood, smiled before the door closed between them.

Napasandal si Jhing at pumikit.

Oh boy, what should she do?

_____

First time ma-late sa 11:11 time!! 11:48 na huhu :<

Sorry sa sobrang late update, got very sick the past few days pero sana makapag update na nang mas madalas. Sana!! Nang matapos na natin 'tong kwento hihi.

A question!! How do you find the first five chapters so far? How it was written. The build up. Scenes? Elements? Any comments? Specification will be very much appreciated. Salamat :)