A Child of the 1950's

Chapter Twelve

My MUM

My mum was born on 8th November 1920, the same day as Rupert Bear was first published in the Daily Express newspaper. Her name was Margery Irene.  She had black hair and eyes and olive skin. She was very attractive when she was young. She was about 5' 2" tall, slim build. My sister and I towered above her as we grew, to be taller like our dad. Her mother was Daisy and her father was George. She had three sisters. Kathleen was the eldest, then my mum the second daughter then Phyllis and the youngest Betty.

As a child she had illnesses and she was not strong when she grew up. She had diptheria when quite small and had to go to hospital. She told me later in life, that she had an out of body experience, whilst in the hospital. She remembered looking down at herself on a bed. Diptheria is a disease of the throat and can be a killer. Since the 1940's children in the UK have been vaccinated against it so there are rarely cases of the disease nowadays.

In mum's house growing up her Gran, Ellen, had some rooms of her own in the back and my mum and her older sister, Kathleen were with her a lot of the time. I suppose this took the pressure off of Gran's daughter Daisy as there were four girls to look after. Gran was very fussy and would not let mum put her feet on the chair rungs, but she was very kind and my mother loved her very much. She took great care of mum when she was ill. Mum often had migraine as a child and Gran used to put vinegar pads on her head to ease the pain. Mum suffered from migraine now and again throughout her lifetime. It runs in the family.

Mum started work when she was 14 years old. Her first and only job, was with a company called Robinsons which was in Fishponds, in the city. It was a packaging company and she worked in the factory. This was the only job she had until the war and then she worked on Munitions.

She needed a bicycle to ride to work and the shop where she bought it wanted her father to sign a piece of paper for him to be her 'Guarantor.' An older person than a 14 year old, who would take responsibility to pay for the bike should she default in payments. As he was such a mean, selfish man her father would not do this. So my mother, who was always very honest and never told lies, signed the paper herself. She paid for the bike out of her hard earned wages and did not need any Guarantor! This was the first and probably only dishonest thing my mother ever did. And who could blame her?

Trams used to go about our city in mum's teenage years and she said you had to be careful not to let your bicycle wheel go into one of the tram lines or you would have to get it out pretty sharp before a tram came along.  How scary!

This is a little reference I found when mum died and we were clearing out her apartment. I shows the type of person she was. I am so proud of her. It was written by the pastor at Kensington Baptist Tabernacle, which was the first chapel she attended.

'It is a real pleasure to testify to the trustworthiness and general good character of Margery (surname) of (address) Easton, whom I have known all her life and she is in close touch with our Sunday School and Young people's Organisation at Kensington Tabernacle. She is amenable, diligent and anxious to please and will be found thoroughly reliable by whomsoever may employ her.

Heartily recommending her and wishing her every success.'

Thomas Davies

Pastor

It was hard work during the war in the Robinsons factory, as it was open seven days a week for longer hours and the workers were often kept awake at night because of the air raids. It was too hard for people of a weaker constitution and unfortunately, after the war mum had a nervous breakdown and took a while to recover. I am not sure what 'munitions' meant or quite what she did in the factory, but it was for the war effort. I expect it was packaging items in boxes.

My dad and mum were together from the age of 15. They went to the same school, Bannerman Road Primary, which I later attended. Mum can remember standing with a friend inside the school at the window and my dad winking at her from the playground. She asked her friend 'Who's that boy?' and was told 'That's Kenneth (surname).' He made a good impression on her and she always said it was dad she wanted and no other boy. He was very good looking when he was young.  I can imagine he always had a cheeky grin on his face! Dad was a cheeky young man and was always messing around. He accidentally broke a window at the chapel in his teens and mum was horrified! I imagine she was cross with him for a while.

As a young woman mum won two pretty ankle competitions and she had a lovely pair of legs.

Mum always thought that her father was the worst in the world as he got drunk regularly and came home shouting and swearing. However, she realised as she got older that he never touched them in any way or hit them and never took anything which belonged to them. Men can be monsters, but he was not quite a monster I am happy to say, although he did not take good care of his family. She was surprised that her father's awful behaviour did not colour dad's parents view of her and they welcomed her into their family with open arms. She was a quiet, loving person so there was no reason for them to reject her. She was a church goer like them too, so they had that in common. I think they all attended St Mark's Baptist chapel at the time.

Mum was a wonderful mother, she cared for us so well. She was quite fussy about the house, but not so much that we were made to feel unhappy at home. I never saw a spot of dust in our house as a child, I would not have known what one was! Ha, ha. (Unlike my house, I am sorry to say, you can finds specks of dust if you look.)  Mum never, ever swore, I never heard her saying nasty things about anyone else and she was very kind hearted. We were always kept clean and tidy and had nice clothes to wear and plenty to eat.  I have never in my whole life gone to bed hungry or not had at least a week's holiday each year,  I am so thankful for that.

Mum liked to laugh and I can remember several times when we laughed until our cheeks ached about something or other. When I was small I put a cardigan on my legs and pranced around the room (I was about seven) we nearly died laughing!  It was so funny! Mum often played shops or post offices with me and I enjoyed it so much. I once made a pretend telephone switchboard with cardboard and wires to go with my telephone. How I loved it! It goes to show that expensive toys are not really necessary as children are very good at improvising.

Mum was ill for a couple of months with pernicious aneamia when I was four or five. Her face grew very white and her cheeks hollowed in. I was very worried that she might die, but she recovered in time. She fainted a few times and there was always smelling salts and a bottle of medicinal bandy in the house for these occasions. There was never any other drink in the house, as Methodists and Baptists don't drink. Alcohol has never meant anything to me at all, although I am not tee total.

Mum and dad used to smoke. Dad every day and mum occasionally when they were with friends.

Mum had a long list of words which are not in the dictionary. I have struggled to find out what they actually mean. When I was playing in the street she would say:

'Don't sit on the floor (the concrete) you'll get the Pip.'  As far as I know, I never did get it.  She called the small area outside of the front door which had a small wall around it the 'barton.' She said dad was an 'arden' boy which was supposed to mean 'cheeky.' Someone had St Vitus Dance.   And there are other words I have forgotten. I suppose this is what you call local dialect? I really don't know, but it is very funny when I think of it now. We were all Bristolians, so that probably accounts for it.  Ha, ha, ha.  I am not a fan of a broad Bristolian accent, although I find myself lapsing into it from time to time.  If you want to know what a broad Bristolian accent sounds like here is a sample. My mum reminded me when I was a mother myself, that a school friend of mine (I was about 12 at the time) met us on the road and asked me a question, which was 'Hast thee done thee homework, Pat?' It's like language from the 1600's! Isn't that hilarious?

I can remember mum wearing a wrap around pinafore over her clothes, whilst she did her housework. She used to wear a turban on her head. She was fond of the front door step and was always scrubbing it and polishing it. It was a slab of white marble. Ha, ha! She used to use a white powder called 'Vim' which had to be mixed with water to use as a cleaner. She would work all morning then have a wash, change her clothes, bush her hair and put on some lipstick. She only ever wore foundation power and lipstick, but mostly lipstick on it's own in the week.  She always said if you feel a bit down, a bit of makeup will make you feel better.

Some afternoons she used to go to the 'Mothers Union' where she met with other women, I think this was a church organistion.

She had a blue glass bottle on the mantlepiece in her bedroom, which contained the scent 'Evening In Paris.' I think it was her last bottle as they stopped manufacturing it in the late 1960's. It was very popular in the 1940's.

She had some horseshoe, pearl clip on earrings, but she never had much jewellery. She had a wedding ring, engagement ring and later on in life in her fifties, dad bought her an Eternity ring, with little stones all the way round.

In the house next door lived Mr and Mrs Porter. Mrs Porter was stone deaf and often went to the 'Deaf' club to be with other people like herself. She never learned to lip read and could not do the finger language which deaf people use to communicate. When Mr Porter died she was very lonely. Mum made sure she came into tea every Saturday or Sunday to give her a break and this went on for many years. Her name was Florence and they called her 'Flo.' Apparently she went deaf as she had a baby daughter with a severe mental handicap who was put into an institution (as it was called then) to be cared for as she could not be cared for at home. The shock of having a disabled child like this brought on the deafness. Shock can bring on many illnesses, including diabetes.

Mrs Purnell lived across the street. She was not in a happy marriage and was a little strange.  She had no children.   Mum often asked her over now and then in the afternoon for a cup of tea and a biscuit to give her some company. This arrangement carried on until Mrs Purnell died.

Mum was kind to everyone.

Mum could knit very well and taught me to knit too. She knitted socks at one point for our dad. This was done using three needles in a triangle. I have just finished knitting a very chunky cardigan with a beautiful shawl collar. It may be the last large item I knit as my hands are arthritic.

Mum also taught me to sew and use a sewing machine. I made lots of dresses in the 1970's and only wish I had kept swatches of the materials I used and took a photo of each one (although I do have a lot, but not all) as it would be interesting to see them all placed in a note book. I went on to make my own wedding dress and bridesmaid's dress which turned out well.

We were both taught, my sister and I, to respect other people and never to be rude. I think, however, we were not taught how to stand up for ourselves. A person need not be rude, but they can say what is on their mind and not be pushed around by others. Or, perhaps that is just me? I do not like confrontation at all and it makes me sometimes think I am a wimp! Ha, ha. But I certainly would not like to be a bully or someone others cross the road to avoid ha, ha! So I suppose I have to put up with myself the way I am. I'm too old to change now!

As I grew older, Mum became my best friend and I have never found a better one. I always saw her twice a week, visiting her on Wednesdays from when my children were small right up until she died. Mum and dad came up every Sunday evening to see us, whilst dad went off to play for evening services at a local church, mum sat and chatted to us. Then dad came back and had supper with us before they went home. My mum was very fond of my husband and was a wonderful mother-in-law.

Mum loved my dad so much and they had a good life together after the war, to make up for the hard times. They were very much in love until the day dad was taken from her at the age of 81.  They were a true love story.  They gave my sister and me a very loving home.

I miss her so much at Christmas time, which is family time for most people. We always went to tea with mum and dad on Boxing Day and it pains me every Boxing Day when I don't see them both! I dream about her so often. In the last dream I said 'I miss you so much mum.' And she replied 'I miss you too.' It is a comfort to me knowing that I will see her again as I firmly believe in Heaven.

My mum died in Frenchay Hospital, in 2005 with breathing problems. She was 84 years old and survived my dad by three years.