Prompt:

Born into a family of do-gooders, you're insistent on being an unpleasant person. But no matter what you do, something goes right. This drives you absolutely insane.

*****

"Ugh, why do I do the right things?"

"Maybe because your family never left," chuckled my best friend, Andrew.

I rubbed my face with my hands and replied, "You obviously wouldn't understand. I've literally broken the universal law, time travelled and accidentally leaked Einstein's atomic bomb inventions, which was obviously bad, but it somehow stopped America from bombing Japan. And I'm not facing trial for any of the laws I've broken!"

"Maybe you should carry on your family's history of doing good?" Andrew asked.

I drowned out his words as I tried to think of something that could never go right. Something like making the sky rain knives or something I pushed myself out of my stocky wooden chair and headed out of the spacious office I've inherited at the Ministry of Time and Peace. Perhaps I should break the greatest law of all and destroy this place. After all, if there's no Ministry of Time and Peace, everything should go wrong, right?

However, would it be worth it to destroy this place just to break the greatest law?

"Wait, what if you're doing something wrong? Maybe doing the right thing is the way to make things go wrong?" Andrew wondered out loud.

I paused for a moment, considering Andrew's words, and realised that maybe, he had a point.

"I know this is weird, but what if we try doing something good for a change?"

Andrew pondered this for a while.

"No. When has that worked for anyone ever? Name one bad guy who turned good to cause a bigger misdeed," he pouted with his arms crossed.

"Have you watched 'The Bad Guys'?" a little kitty said, peaking around the corner.

"Isn't that the movie on Netflix (not a sponsorship unless you want it to be one)?" asked Andrew, a hint of curiosity in his voice.

The little kitty looked at Andrew and me, and walked towards us. It suddenly turned into a monster and growled at us ferociously. I placed myself in front of Andrew and the monster, ready to sacrifice myself. To my eternal shock and horror, the monster leapt over me, picked Andrew up with its mouth and disappeared.

And that was how I was finally able to conduct my first murder, with extremely good intentions.

The End.