Medallion, thanks to Tessa's work with her, was calmer now.  I, on the other hand, was inwardly anxious.  It wasn't a feeling I was used to, and one I didn't like, for a reason I'd never had before:  I didn't want to do wrong by her.

I looked her in the eye as I waited for Tessa to mount Challenger.  "This time will be different, okay?"

She blinked at me.  I smiled and straightened her forelock over the brow band.  "Really, it will be."  

Tessa swung up on Challenger and I took a deep breath.  Now it was our turn.  

"If she moves off before you're ready, just do a one rein stop," Tessa instructed.  "Keep the same position you had on Challenger.  She's not as sensitive as him, but still, keep it tuned down."  

I nodded.  Well, it was time. 

I lined Medallion up beside the block, gathered the reins, stuck my foot in the stirrup, and mounted.  

Medallion didn't walk off on me, but let me find my other stirrup.  I started shortening my reins but I didn't get very far before Tessa said, "Alright, that's short enough. Now, find that position you had on Challenger."

I closed my eyes and referenced back to what I'd felt on Challenger. I was good at memorizing sensations, what something felt like. I tilted my pelvis forward and lifted my right side to find that first feeling.

"Good, that's it. Now keep that, and ask her to walk, but remember, keep it toned down."

I opened my eyes. Tessa was leg yielding across the arena, but she was watching me. I marveled at the ease she and Challenger moved.

Focus! I chided myself. Lifting my right shoulder a bit more, I tried out the leg aid that worked on Challenger.

Medallion flicked an ear back to me and sort of leaned forward, but didn't take a step. Okay, so she wasn't quite as sensitive as Challenger. I nudged her a bit harder to tell her that yes, I really did want to go.

She believed me and strode out in a fast walk. It was about as fast as Challenger's, but it felt faster to me. Challenger seemed to stride forward with balanced power and impulsion, Medallion was just putting her feet out as fast as she could.

Instinctively, I started to raise my hands to slow her down with the reins.

"Don't!" Tessa's rapped out. "She's fine, she's just unbalanced right now and tugging at the reins won't help."

I bit my lip in concentration and put my hand back down.

"Just walk along the rail for awhile. Don't let your right shoulder drop."

I lifted my right shoulder for the thousandth time. Ugh, how I hated it's droopiness! 

Walking along the rail could have been boring, would have been boring, that is, except it wasn't something that Medallion and I had successfully done before.  Always, our rides had started out with tussles about her dramatic switching between gears of walk, her disrespect to my commands, etc.  

But today was different.  Medallion was calm, something she'd never been under me.  While yes, her walk was unbalanced and unsettlingly fast, and I didn't feel I had any control over it with long reins, we were actually going somewhere.  We were just walking up along the rail.  

I took a deep breath of relief, and let the anxiety that I, or rather we, wouldn't be able to do this go.  My hips swung freely to her walk, and I couldn't remember a time I had done that on her.  

Subtly, she began to walk more like a banana.  Annoyed, I started to pick up on the reins to correct her.  

"Ah!  Don't.  Pick up your right shoulder, you let it drop again."  

Oh, how quickly I forgot.  I set the reins down and fairly yanked my shoulder up.  My abrupt change startled Medallion, but when I didn't do anything else, she resumed marching along calmly and not in a banana shape.  

I let out a breath that I'd been holding when the first problem had come up.  

Tessa came up alongside me on Challenger, but kept a distance between us.  Medallion pinned her ears whenever Challenger got too close, as we'd found out early in the session.  

Tessa let out a chuckle.  "Vanessa, your face is all twisted up like a dish rag.  Relax, this isn't torture."  

I let my tense face muscles loose and chuckled too.  "I just...  Well it's never been like this for me and Medallion.  I'm afraid I'll do something wrong and ruin it, or that some problem will come up that we can't solve." 

She nodded.  "I understand.  I've felt that too.  But you can't let that worry get to you, or the very thing you worry about will happen."  

I hadn't thought about it that way.  

"One thing that has helped me is to think of problems not as something to be solved as quickly as possible and gotten over, or as annoyances that complicate the training process, but rather as puzzles.  Puzzles to be studied and figured out.  Puzzles to ask "Why?"  about." 

I raised my eyebrows.  "Oh?"  

"Yeah.  Because if you think about them that way, you don't angry or frustrated, but curious.   And then you're able to solve them rationally, which is often the quickest way.  It also gives you a more thorough answer, so that when similar problems arise in other horses, or other problems come up, you're more prepared to deal with them." 

A door unlocked in my mind, letting rays of sunlight spill into dark corners of ignorance.  "Say, that does make sense."  

She smiled.  "It does.  That's why I'm able to help you as much as I can.  I've learned from problems."  She chuckled ruthfully.  "I've had my fair share of trial and error." 

She let Challenger have a longer rein.  "There's a good lad."  

"What'd he do?"  I hadn't been able to perceive anything  Challenger had done worthy of reward.

"He maintained a strong impulsion while remaining calm, happy, and through his back.  That's something we've been working on.  I don't know if you could see it or not, but if I'd asked for trot, or maybe even canter right there, he would have easily given it to me."  

She flipped a piece of gray mane over.  "On this one, I've had a lot of problems to sort through."  Her voice held love.  

She glanced over at Medallion.  "And you will too.  But if you stick with it, you'll learn much more from her."  

"Yeah, I think you're right.  But I probably won't be winning on her anytime soon."  

Tessa shrugged.  "If that's all you ride for, you might as well not ride."  She didn't say this in a hurtful or mean way, just stated it as fact.  "Besides, if that's really important to you, just look at it as a future investment.  If you figure her out now, it'll help you understand other horses in the future that could get you your wins."  

We rounded a corner without either of us noticing, so engrossed were we in our conversation.

"I'm not sure how much I want to win," I confessed.  "I mean, I do want to win.  Every time I get in the ring I feel this burning desire.  But it's a fire that's never satisfied and sometimes...  Sometimes I wish I could take a break from it all."  

"Why don't you?" 

"Because it's not what's expected.  Everyone competes at Vantage Point."   I thought about the girl on the Arab mare.  "Well, almost everyone.  My trainer expects me to compete, my mother does, everyone does."  

Tessa cocked her head at me.  "You never seemed to me to be someone who followed everyone's expectations."  

"I... Well."  I shrugged.  "I do, I guess, but I do it in such a loud and flashy way that everyone thinks I'm 'breaking out of the mold' so to speak."

Tessa was silent for a moment.  "I know that 'breaking out of the mold' isn't easy.  It's harder for you, because of where you live and all.  But for Medallion's sake, that might be what you have to do.  Besides, you still have Win to compete on." 

I swallowed.  "Yeah, I do.  I just... Had plans for Medallion."  

"Horses have a way of graciously looking over our plans, before savagely ripping them to pieces and giving you an innocent look,"  Tessa quipped.  "You say you love to win.  So start competing for something else."  

She gestured to Medallion.  "Compete for her to become strong enough to do what you ask.  Compete for the right to touch her mouth and guide her.  Fight for her love and trust.  That must become your prize."  

My mind leapt on this new idea and twirled it around.  What could that mean for me and Medallion? 

"But enough talk," concluded Tessa.  "Let's start working on turning, shall we?  Also, careful.  That right-"

I started picking up my shoulder even before she was done correcting me. 

AN:  Wow, a full long chapter this round!!  Hope y'all enjoyed it <3