Realisation dawned on me when I tried to rack my brain for an answer. At first, I thought Nikolai was implying me, but then understanding dawned on me.

Asra had a sneaky habit of creeping into my mind. Since coming to terms with the bond and accepting him fully, his obsession had grown quiet. I no longer felt the dull fullness of him eaves-dropping into my thoughts, and he came and go as he pleased if I didn't consciously block him.

So, it did not surprise me when he felt my anger through the bond. He was trying to be sneaky and come find me silently, but I was already on his plan.

"Before he gets here, I need fast answers." I stated.

"Okay?" Nikolai frowned.

"Ready?"

"I suppose."

"How do you know me?"

"I have met you before."

I narrowed my eyes.

"You are my son's mate."

I bared my teeth at him, and he blinked, surprised.

"I knew your father."

"Good." I breathed. "How do you know of my birthmark?"

"You were not a modest toddler, Ailia." He chuckled.

I scowled. "How did you see me? How do you know my father?"

"I lived with him. I was his... friend."

"You say that with suspicion."

"It has been a long time since I had a friend, Ailia." He stated.

I frowned. "Where did you live?"

"In my old pack."

"My father lived in your pack?"

He shifted his weight, glancing out of the window before focusing back on me. I understood the importance straight away, focusing my full attention on him.

"Your bloodline is one of the ancient ones." He began, and I inhaled sharply. "After the Moon Goddess created the first bloodline, she realised she needed another stronger one to protect the original. You have read my journal. You know what Asra is, you know what his mother was."

I nodded quietly.

"The goddess created the beta blood line; she created your great-something grandfather." He explained. "And wherever the alpha bloodline goes, the beta follows. Flynn lived many places, and when Serena moved to the human village, he moved to mine. He lived there when Asra was a pup. You were born on my land."

I shook my head. "I can't. That's... That's impossible."

"It isn't." He insisted. "You were born on my pack land, Ailia Thorne."

"Then why... Why does he live with Augustus? Surely, he would stay with Asra..."

"His priority was my mate. When she died, he moved, as Asra was rather... different... wild."

"You mean you were." I pointed out, reminding him of all the wolves he murdered.

"Pasts do not define our present, Ailia." He stated. "Loosing my mate broke me in many ways."

"Yet you are here now."

"For my son. I am his protector. Flynn moved to be with his sister, your aunt. He... He doesn't know about Asra."

Luna Black.

"But... how does Asra not recognise me?" I shook my head. "I lived among him!"

"You were an infant, an unshifted wolf. You were just a baby."

"My mother? My birth mother?"

His eyes fell with sadness. "I was not the only one who lost their mate that day."

My heart dropped to the pit of my stomach. Any hope of discovering more of my past shattered. My mother was dead, meaning she must've died when they attacked Asra's pack. From there, my father fled, and left Nikolai to look after his son. People grieved differently. Some flee, some commit murder and destroy packs, it seems.

Goodness, I feel sick...

Before I could ask another question, the door clanged open. I flinched, turning to find Asra stood naked on the threshold. He growled, noticing how close his father was to me and before I could react, there was a crash and a whole load of wind.

Staring upside down at my mate's butt crack was less than ideal. I mean, it didn't smell, but... crack.

Asra was growling, the sound vibrating my stomach. I huffed, blowing my hair out of my face as I wriggled in his grasp. He had me over his shoulder like a damn child. When he didn't put me down, I scaled his back with my hands until I was rod-straight, my palms digging into his shoulders.

"What are you doing?" Nikolai asked.

"I should ask you the same thing." Asra growled.

"We were just having a conversation." His father stated.

"Hello? I am not a ladder." I stated. "Put me down."

Asra growled, claws tickling my thigh. "No."

"Asra!" I snapped. "I do not want to be man-handled!"

He ignored me, and I growled, digging my nails into his skin.

His father grunted. "I think you should-

"You do not get to tell me what to do!" Asra growled.

"I am sick of being treated like an accessory, Asra!" I huffed. "Put me the fuck down right now."

I felt him tense at my words, and with a begrudging grumble, he pulled me down. Once I was upright, I pushed my hair out of the way and stood steady. Glaring at him, my mate didn't even glance at me as he took me by the arm and pulled me to his side.

He was grabby today.

"Asra, son...."

"Why is she here? What did you do?" Asra seethed.

"I did nothing."

"Liar." Asra snarled.

"He is telling the truth." I raised an eyebrow.

Finally, his dark eyes snapped to me. I narrowed my own at him, taking my arm out of his grasp.

"Do I looked harmed? Do I look upset?"

His eyes dropped over my body, grumbling as he looked at all of me. Travelling his gaze back up, they settled on my mark before meeting my eyes. His puffed-up chest relaxed slightly, but he was still on edge.

"Now, are you going to talk to me or just keep being wolfy?"

He growled at me, but I merely smirked at him. When he realised he wouldn't get a rise out of me, he huffed and looked away.

"Why are you even here, Ailia?"

I scowled. "I entered the cabin myself because I wanted to speak with Nikolai."

He narrowed his eyes at us. "Why?"

"I admittedly summoned her here."

Asra scowled at his father, pushing me slightly behind his back. "Why?"

I wondered if this man knew any other word today.

"I wanted to meet my son's mate."

Asra didn't believe him, his body tense with agitation.

"I still walked into the house without being told to." I shook my head, wrapping my fingers around Asra's elbow. "We have had a little chat."

"About what? How he likes to kill people?" He sarcastically drawled.

I scowled at him. "Asra."

He huffed, looking away from me.

"Your mate can stand her ground without you holding her back." Nikolai scratched his jaw.

"I am not holding her back."

"Yet you make her stand behind you." He quirked an eyebrow. "From the time I have spent with her, I know she is more capable of standing her ground than anybody I have met."

Asra's grumble was softer this time, and I felt my chest warm with gratitude at the old man's words.

"So what, you bring her in here to pester her with questions?"

"Actually, I asked most of the questions. Nikolai here is very evasive, reminds me of someone..." I suggested, cocking my head at my mate.

"She is very nosey." Nikolai agreed. "A lot of thoughts in that head."

"Hey!" I scowled.

"But she is smart, Asra. She knows a lot more than you'd think."

I didn't catch what the look he gave his son meant, not understanding the strange wolf gesture. Was it sarcasm? A joke? Perhaps.

"He made me dinner, too." I interrupted.

"He did?" Asra scowled.

"Sure did." Nikolai mused, going to sit in his armchair. "Been a while since I cooked for two. She even criticised my lack of chopping equipment."

"He cut the meat on the same side the fur lay, and he didn't use a chopping board." I scolded.

Nikolai chuckled, back to scratching his jaw again. Asra glanced between the two of us before sighing.

"Father, you cannot just drag my mate into your cabin when you want to study her."

"I was being friendly."

"I assume he stalked you." Asra glanced down at me.

"Like a puppy." I nodded. "I didn't know it was him, though."

"I was in disguise." Nikolai stated.

"Your beast is hardly blended in." I quirked an eyebrow. "Then entices me with food after I told him I was hungry. I should've paid attention to fairy tales. I could've been a wolf's dinner by now."

Nikolai's eyes brightened at my joke, and I mentally praised myself. Sidestepping my mate, I was grateful when he didn't move to shield me. Sitting down at the dining table, I picked my previously abandoned drink and had a sip.

My stomach and head were aching. All of this was a lot, especially when I wasn't expecting it.

"Why do you live down here alone, anyway? You are hardly feral." I pointed at Nikolai.

"What have you heard of me?"

"You are a feral, murderous beast who acts like a guard dog."

He hummed. "Well, partly true. I live here because it is near the southern borders of our land."

"Why southern? Is it important?"

"The land beyond is no-man's-land, unclaimed territory. A lot of bad things in there, Spitfire."

Asra grunted at the nickname, but stayed silent.

"So you scare them away?"

"What is scarier? A tale of a beast who tears apart living creatures because he has lost his mind to his beast, or an elderly man who lives in a cabin in the woods to monitor things?"

"Definitely the elderly man." I nodded, smirking.

He grunted, exhaling a sharp laugh out of his nose. "When Asra's mother died, I became feral. It is not a lie."

"And kill your pack?"

He grimaced. "Not all of them. Thankfully, Asra got them out in time."

Studying him, I felt slightly sorry for the man. To lose yourself over a broken heart, to let somebody else be in control of your body because of such powerful emotions...

I knew Asra resented his father for being... well, basically a murderer, and I felt the awkward tension rise. I was quick to change the topic, shifting the attention sideways.

"So why stay here at all? Why not succumb to your beast?"

He levelled his gaze, and I paused, staring right back into his eyes. "I have to protect what is mine, Ailia Thorne."

Swallowing, I nodded gently. "I see."

I understood.

"Even though he could go elsewhere because me, his son, the alpha, is stronger and can handle it." Asra sarcastically drawled.

I cocked my head, glancing between the two. Did Asra not know...

Nikolai narrowed his eyes, shaking his head just a centimetre. I caught onto it right away, finding it easy to pick up on his tells now. Gently closing my mind from my mate, I studied his father instead.

Asra knew of his blood. It was in Nikolai's journal. He told both Asra and his mother, right?

Right?

Did Asra know he was an original blood line? The first bloodline? A direct descendant?

If he did, then this makes this easier.

But by Nikolai shaking his head...

Did he not know of his protectors? My ancestors were supposed to protect Asra's blood. They raised me as an infant within his pack walls. Does he know this? Does he recognise my bloodline's importance here?

Asra must know what he was. He is an enormous beast who had many suitors lined up as a teenager. He defeated a continental alpha, even shifted early. Only to forget that because of a medication provided by a witch...

A witch.

My eyes widened.

Did Nikolai know of a witch who could help me unlock my mind?

How did he get the journal to me?

Why was he suddenly so interested in telling me the truth?

Why hide it from his son?

Why could I not tell Asra?

Was something wrong with them?

Was something wrong with Asra?

Was something wrong with me?

All of these thoughts made me nauseous.

I turned to study my mate as he conversed softly with his father. I had tuned out to their conversation about border control a while ago, too lost in my confusing thoughts.

Did Nikolai know something I didn't?

Other than Asra's grouchiness, he seemed fine to me. Why could he not know who I was to him other than a mate? That it was a deeper, fated reason than just being soulmates. It tied me to him eternally in more ways than one.

My brain was practically imploding with questions. There was so much going on lately that I couldn't keep up with it!

The dull ache grew at the back of my head, and I winced as it slowly spread across my temples. My fingers felt tight, a sweaty sheen spreading across my body as goosebumps pebbled my skin.

I wish things could just be normal for one day. That was all I asked. None of this strange, hidden past shit. None of the abusive ex-partner, or strange wolf man in the cabin.

I groaned softly, my head falling into my hands as the pain made my vision swirl and my stomach cramp.

A hand settled on my back, and I flinched away from its weight. My skin felt on fire, burning and undesiring the need for touch.

"Tulip?" Asra wondered.

He was beside me. I could faintly see the outline of his body, but he seemed so... far away. Why was he far away?

My eyes squinted, painful electric currents zapping down my spine as my vision turned white and hazy. I barely register the soft cry from my mouth, Asra's name slipping from my lips before everything became dark.