Dear Lauren,

I'm so fed up with people today. I'm sure it's not their fault, and I probably wouldn't be annoyed with them if it wasn't that time of the month, but people are being so stupid today.

I started my book club today, and one person accidentally put their form and stuff outside of the chains I made to make finding stuff easier for me. Well, that's okay, I can understand that it was an honest mistake.

But then ANOTHER person comes along and does the exact same thing. When I told them that I had put chains for them to put everything in, they said they didn't know. Maybe if they read the INSTRUCTIONS they would have known. Anyways, they also gave me a book suggestion and told me that it was a little hard to find. Okay, well, I appreciate that, but the purpose of a book club is to read books together that not many people have so we can experience the story at the same time. And if a book is kinda hard to find where they live, don't you think some people might not have it in their library at all? Maybe suggest something a little bit accessible for everyone next time.

I was at Girl Scouts today and the troop leader kept on droning on and on about our silver award and stuff. It's like, please stop talking and boring me to death so we can start planning and stuff. She talked a lot about how we needed to get permission for this stuff, how we should talk to our HOA for our project, and then what her and her daughter are talking about. She changed something I was really excited about into something kinda bland and boring. I mean, I guess geocaching is fun and all, but I'd honestly prefer to have a random stranger give me a little gift they made with a note. Then I'd make one and give it to another person, and they'd do the same thing, and so on. Now you just go geocache for a gift.

Our project is about mental health and trying to help people with theirs, not increasing my stress, my anger, and my annoyance. Being in school with everyone making a big deal about how everyone needs to make a hundred on all their tests or else they'll punish everyone is hard enough without having to go up to a bunch of Karens and going "Hey, we'd like to a project in the playground. No? That's okay, we'll just scrape our entire idea and start all over again with only about a month left where we still need to pour 50 hours into making our project."

Another thing is the book trailers the new librarian is making us do in NTB. I swear, every cussing trailer has a summary of the book and then asking what'll happen next before telling the viewer to go read the book. It's not even fun at this point, it's busywork. Whatever happened to the fun stuff we used to do like Pictionary or guessing what emojis represented what book? That was fun. Those Tuesday mornings before Mrs. Trumble got sick and died were the only reason I kept going. Now I lost my friend because the most popular club that she's in is scheduled on the same day at the same time as our new meetings. I'd quit if it wasn't my last year.

I'm going to cry from everything that's happening. I freaking hate life. If my school wants to give every kid that's 5 seconds late to class in school suspension because their teacher wouldn't let them pack up until 2 minutes after the bell rang and your next class is upstairs and across the school, fine! I don't freaking care anymore! If the new librarian wants to take away everything that made NTB fun, go ahead! If my school is the next victim of a shooting, then let me die! I don't want to live anymore, but I'm too scared to take it!

Sometimes I think you're really lucky that you're not alive. Everything is getting worse year by year.

PS. I apologize to all that I was annoyed at, you couldn't have known every little thing would set me off today. If you want, blame it on the cramps. They're making me want to punch a wall.