Title: Blood of the Empire

author: QueenOfSecrets1308

description:

In an Empire that was said to be more powerful than the armies of the Gods, a storm has begun to brew. Its cause? A woman. And not just any woman; the most powerful warrior to have ever ruled; whose steps cause the very ground to quake in fear; who can silence anyone before her.Lady Nila Taraani seems perfect. She was the first woman to be a General in the army of Viumbe, she is kind to everyone, she is loved by the entire Kingdom, and she is married to her childhood friend, Prince Bahati.

However, what the Kingdom does not know is that she does not resemble the perfect Princess she seems to be on the outside, for Nila has a dark secret- a secret which is threatening to unveil itself; and if she does not play her part in the role she was destined for, it could mean destruction for everything and everyone she loves.

During times of war with the Northern Empire, and with the death of the King, Nila must keep her lies buried in their graves without the smart, devilishly handsome Prince Jua finding out about them.

But what is a new ruler to do when there is a mole in their midst? When everyone seems to be hiding something, whom can you believe? Exactly how many secrets does it take for an Empire to crumble?

title/cover:

title: i love the title, perfectly suitable!

score: 5/5

cover: 

the cover is also wonderful. simply, yet perfect for the story itself.

score: 5/5

total score: 10/10

summary/hook:

summary: the first paragraph is exactly how it should be. powerful and enticing. i love the analogy of the Princess to a storm. it's perfectly fitting, and already we know she's a strong character.

although the blurb is worded beautifully, and very well-polished, i do feel that it can be shortened, simply because it doesn't convey a lot of information. it's really mysterious, which is fine, but the blurb is a whole lot of mystery and not a lot of information.

the question at the end is brilliant. makes me want to click 'read' right away!

score: 4/5

hook: 

"There had not been snow, much less a blizzard, in the capital of Nyota for nearly two hundred years. 

The entire population had gone indoors, and not a single man roamed the streets. Every door was bolted shut, keeping the harsh, icy weather out, and the worried, unprepared people in. Not a soul dared to venture outside for fear of being lost in the dense fog that clouded the roads, making it impossible to see a thing."

beautiful opening. the setting is so easy to visualize, and the tone of the story is set right off the bat. i'm a sucker for imagery and prose, so this paragraphs resonates very well with me. 

i could clearly imagine this as maybe a movie or a t.v. show being narrated, and the capital itself is a great visual!

score: 5/5

total score: 9/10

grammar/flow:

from what i could tell, i didn't see many grammatical errors. there were some comma splices -- an abundance of them in the later chapters -- but nothing major. 

as for the flow, the story flows well for the most part. in the first chapter, i found that there may have been an info-dumping feeling with the first few paragraphs.

taking a pause between an action scene to provide descriptions is a great technique, but i found the background information to be just a bit extensive. it could possibly be dispersed better throughout the rest of the chapter, but that's only a minor issue, and a simple suggestion.

other than that, the transitions are very smooth, and the scenes blend well together. the descriptions are beautiful and bleed off the page, along with powerful words and dialogue.

score: 8.5/10

characters:

quite possibly my favorite aspect of the story is its characters. Nila is such a powerful woman, and Bahati is the most supportive and empowering husband I could imagine. the respect the two have for each other is gorgeous, and i found myself admiring him very much.

Jua's character is also dynamic and written extremely well. each character has their own strong voice, and though i felt that they were all beautifully portrayed, i would have loved to see more of their personalities through dialogue, and not just simply stating traits. 

amazing job with the characters!

score: 9/10

plot:

i don't usually read such stories, but this one is very unique and well thought-out. the story is full of surprises and secrets, with characters who do them justice. 

i truly don't have many criticisms of the plot, especially because it hasn't progressed that much at the point to where i've read, but i'm sure it'll continue to bloom beautifully. 

score: 9/10

all in all, Blood of the Empire is a beautifully-written novel that deserves recognition. the author is obviously very talented, and you'll find yourself completely immersed in the book. i recommend it to all readers!