A few more days had passed and all of their plans to get me to turn it back on failed miserably.

“Just give up already,” I said, coughing at the end of the sentence. “I would sooner dessicate than turn it back on.”

“Then that’s what you’ll do,” Stefan nodded before slamming the cell door shut and locking it.

I need to get out of here. You need blood. One thing at a time. Once you have the blood, you’ll be stronger than all of them. You know that. They're older and more experienced. And you’re angry.

I pushed myself off the rock weakly, walking over to the door to find Damon sitting across from it. I held myself up by the bars and watched him until he noticed me.

“What are you doing?” he asked.

“I heard you were losing it but I didn’t realize how bad off you were,” I responded. He truly looked awful. His hair was a disheavled mess and he probably looked as worn out as I did. “All this because of a girl?”

Damon let out a deep chuckle, shaking his head causing his hair to fall over his forehead. He put his palm face down on the floor and pushed himself up, walking over to the door when he did. “Just make this easier on all of us and skip ahead a few chapters. Turn it back on.”

“No.”

He reached up and held onto the bar adjacent to the one I currently held. He rested his head down on the door. He looked so exhausted... He’s playing you. Right.

Damon looked back at me, “Why not?”

“I just…” I trailed off, “I can’t.”

“That’s not a reason.”

“I said I can’t okay!” I shouted and he stood up straight. “Just let me out!”

“Not gonna happen.”

I watched him in disbelief, they just wouldn’t give up. You know what you have to do. I’m not going to do that. It’s the only way. No. You have to. “I said no!” I shouted, holding the sides of my head, backing away from the door. “Just leave me alone…”

“Evelyn?” Damon asked, looking at me in confusion. “Evie, what’s wrong?”

I let out a malicious chuckle, standing up straight, “It’s adorable that you care so much.”

He looked at me in dismay, shaking his head once more, “Have fun in there.” He dropped his hands from the bars and trailed off somberly.

He probably thinks you're crazy now, I couldn't help but think to myself. Are you really crazy or are you the only sane one?

I shook my head as though that would make the voice go away. Leave me alone. Not until you do what you know you have to do.

I looked at the door where Damon had previously stood, rubbing my face in aggravation. Fine.

-

"You're back," I said simply as he let the door shut behind him.

"Hmm," was all he said as he walked further into the cell.

He looked even worse up closer if that was even possible.

"You're drunk," I deduced.

He let out a deep chuckle as he had earlier, once again shaking his head. He didn't speak a word.

I picked up the horribly whittled stake and held it behind my back, "Why are you here?"

"If you would just flip it back on, we could end this conversation now," Damon suggested, his voice giving away his exhaustion.

"I'm good thanks," I said before taking the stake and stabbing him in the abdomen, getting it over with.

Damon stumbled back, his face pale, clutching at the stake and I saw where it had ended up.

His heart.

"No!" I shouted as Damon fell to the floor, his skin slowly changing color, "No, no, no, no."

I quickly ran over, pulling him up, "Hey, hey, hey. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry."

He looked up at me with his beautiful pain filled eyes but was unable to speak, a tear streamed down my face, "You can't be dead, please don't be dead."

I shook my head, burying my face in the crook of his neck as veins covered his whole body. "I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to. I swear, you were never supposed to die. Please don't be dead."

I looked down at him as I realized what I had done.

"Oh my god," I sobbed and I stood up weakly, making my way over to the wall.

"What did I do? What did I do? What did I do?" I repeated as I slowly slid down the wall.

"No, no, no," I shook my head as Stefan and Bonnie entered the room, Elena and Caroline waiting at the door.

Stefan joined me by the wall as Bonnie walked over to Damon's body.

"Oh god, I'm so sorry," I continued to sob, "I- I don't know what happened."

"Hey, hey, it's okay," he soothed, placing his hand over mine.

"It's not okay, how could it ever be okay?" I cried out, "I killed him. How could I do that?"

"Bonnie?" Stefan questioned.

"Just one more minute," she said as she continued chanting some things in witch language and Damon woke with a gasp.

My eyes widened in shock, my breath catching in my throat and I immediately stood up.

A wave of relief washed over me, "Damon?"

He looked at me for a moment before turning to Stefan who was helping him up, "I am never doing that again."

"Wha-what's going on?" I questioned, looking around at everyone in the room. 

"We had to make it look real," Stefan explained.

"What?"

"You weren't responding to any of us, it was the only way."

"So none of that happened?" I said, feeling slightly angry that they would do something like that, "You made me think that I killed him so I would feel?"

"It worked, didn't it?" Damon said with his usual smug smirk that I wanted to both kiss and slap off at the same time.

I quickly pulled him into a hug before pulling away and slapping his arm. I then stood on my tip toes and planted a brief kiss on his lips, "Don't ever do that again."

"How do you feel?" Elena asked.

"Weird…" I trailed off, "It's like I have my emotions but only some and they're trying to slip away? I don't know if that makes sense."

"You have to hold on to one," Stefan explained, "When you turned it off, you turned off every single emotion so it's going to take a bit to get it all back. Just focus on one emotion for now."

"I think I can manage that," I said with a sigh of relief, tears still streaming down my face.

"Can you give us a minute?" I asked everyone, referring to Damon.

Everyone nodded before walking out of the room, leaving Damon and I alone.

"I am so sorry," I said immediately. "I was awful. And working with Katherine? That was...words can't even explain. And I compelled that girl to think you hurt her when it was me. And all of those things I said? I was horrible."

"It's okay," Damon reassured me.

"No it's not," I shook my head. "I was awful…"

"It wasn't you."

"Wasn't it though? Some very twisted part of me but it was me. I knew what I was doing, I knew I was hurting you. I knew I was hurting all of you. Yet I did it anyway. I did so many bad things…"

"But you're you now," Damon shook his head, placing a hand on each of my arms. "You were missing a part of yourself. The part that made you you."

"You were right."

Damon furrowed his brows in confusion, "What are you talking about?"

"What you said," I brushed his hands off with a shrug, "I was the one who opened you up again. After everything that happened with Katherine and your history with your brother. I pushed my way in and then used it against you? That's not forgivable Damon. You deserve someone who will treat you better than that."

"That wasn-"

"I need to go talk to Elena."

"Bu-"

"We'll talk later."

And then I walked out.