Sidharth had expected her to endure with him in the situation and to be patient with him a little more. Opening up wasn't his cup of tea, it's easy for some people while difficult for some. Not like he wasn't going to open up at all, it would gradually happen someday or the other. She was right that he shouldn't be keeping bothered thoughts inside for long because they'd surely become baggage someday. 

"Yaha kab tak rakhega? Aise na baatein andar rakh ke tera dum ghut jayega ek din.." he recalled. Well, it had already happened, his mere ill thoughts about failing a relationship had turned into his huge insecurity, a baggage that wasn't letting him live freely. He was almost done with his morning exercises in the ground all alone, Shehnaaz didn't arrive as per her words. She was a bubbly bird and one big hot headed chicken at the same time, he thought to coax her and ask her to give him some time to freely share those unpleasant pieces of past that he had thrown somewhere inside him like a crushed paper. But she seemed adamant about her decision, there were no morning messages, she didn't show up at the ground and left before he could drop her to the school so headed towards his work. He didn't like it, he had actually thought they'd solve it out and hug it out in the morning itself. Sometimes our thoughts are backed by so much insecurity that they create lies we believe. 

"Itni young hai vo.. Tumhari Shehnaaz... You think you two will be able to work it out? Tumhara aggression dekha hai usne? Do you know how difficult were you to deal with during times? Kar payegi vo? She'd leave you for guys of her age, Sidharth!"  Bhavya's words were the next to echo. Making him anxious, distressed and unable to focus on his work. 

Akbar found him a little lost while they were having lunch together and asked, "So how was Goa? Grabbed the booze and boobs or not?" he played with his eyebrows and gave away a naughty smirk. Sidharth grimaced at his words and asked if he could shut up. The duo carried on with their respective work after having lunch and operated a casualty case in the evening. Akbar was noticing the change in his friend, he wasn't checking his phone today! Big change! 

"Bro..All okay? Kisi baat se stressed hai?" he asked, walking into Sidharth's cabin and taking a seat opposite to his table. 

"Did anything happen in Goa?" Akbar was quick to catch by the way his friend seemed lost. 

"That conference yaar.. Bhavya aayi thi vaha.." Sidharth slumped his shoulders and pressed his forehead with his forefingers. 

"WTF! Bhavya!" Akbar was shocked, he knew his friend's history with that lady from their blooming love to their long distance hardships and the heart shattering breakup. 

"She was apologizing..and said that she wanted to get back with me.." Sidharth revealed. 

"Hain? Abey kya pagal aurat hai! She only had asked you to leave and now after 2 years she wants you back? And what about Shehnaaz.. What did she say?" he showered Sidharth with questions. 

"I asked her to just get lost.. Mujhe bahut gussa aaya yaar us time kasam se.. Aur Shehnaaz ko nahi bataya maine kuch.." Sidharth replied. 

"Kyu nahi bataya?" Akbar asked, confused. 

"Nahi le sakta bhai mai risk.. Nahi samajh payegi vo.. isi baat pe lafda ho gaya kal raat ko apna.." Sidharth sighed, getting up to lit up another cigarette. 

"Kya matlab nahi samjhegi? Tu samjha de!" Akbar shrugged as he followed him to their smoking corner. As simple as that!  

"Baat itni si nahi hai.. Usko pasand nahi ayega if I tell her I've been so serious with someone else and how badly it ended because of me.. Aur vaise bhi she is not at all sure about us.. Mai kaiko risk lu? Vo aur faltu ka is baat pe apna dimag lagayegi.. Even I don't want to look hopelessly broken..'' Sidharth shook his head, letting out a huge smoke cloud and passed his cigarette to Akbar. 

"Not at all serious? Kis angle se? She gets so affected by you from the beginning.. Meri birthday party bhool gaya bhai? She's the same girl you yelled at! She's with you today! Kitna samajhti hai tujhe..! Tere sade se prank me aake Airport tak chali gayi and you say she's not serious! Aur aunty se bhi toh mili.." Akbar pointed out. His friend was definitely blinded with insecurities, making his own life difficult with his own set of beliefs. 

"Aunty se toh bolne ke baad mili.. I convinced her to meet Mom.. she was avoiding all of this.. Okay.. Serious hai but I need my time yaar! She's already so inquisitive.. Kal raste bhar puch puch ke pareshan kar rahi thi aur yadi mai bata deta.. Toh pata hai kya hota? She'd doubt on me! It's obvious.. Aaj baat karne vala tha.. Bolta usko ki ek din sab bata dunga tujhe sach sach lekin madam gusse me hai.. Block karke rakhi hai mere ko.. Ye problem hai! Kabhi kabhi aisi bachkand harkate karti hai.. How do I expect her to understand my complicated self then?" Sidharth snapped at his friend for not taking his side, even though he knew he was trying to mend them and shoved the phone screen in his face, showing that he couldn't see Shehnaaz's DP. Akbar couldn't help but feel sorry for his friend, it wasn't his fault but the situation's. 

"Upar se mera sar phat raha kal se.." Sidharth said, ranking his hand through his hair and lit up another cigarette in frustration. He wanted to see his mother now, only her face and presence would bring him to peace. 

"Mai ghar ja raha hu.." he bid bye to his friend and pulled out his car from the parking lot. Driving through the busy roads, he saw the rush and festive ambience. It was the 4th day of Ganesh Chaturthi, he recalled how he wanted to take Shehnaaz for pandal hopping with him to Lalbaugcha Raja but scenes had totally changed since last night. 

"Mera bacha.. I was missing you!" Rita Ji cooed, engulfed in his son's arm and heard his faint I-missed-you-too. 

"Kya hua beta?" she asked, cupping his face. He simply shook his head and pecked her head before walking over to his room to freshen up. He's not fine, her heart told. She quickly went to the kitchen to roll chapatis for him. 

"Mujhe bata deta beta maine khana nahi banvaya tere liye.. Aaj monday hai.. I had not expected you at all.." they were talking while having their meal. 

"Aur bata Shehnaaz kaisi hai?" she asked, making him pause. 

"Gussa hai.." he replied, looking at her and saw his mother waiting for him to spill it. He told her everything then, escaping the very detailed conversations. Rita Ji too knew about Bhavya, not very well but enough about how her relation with Sidharth were. 

"Isn't she overreacting now? She just left in the middle of the night because of this!" He asked for RitaJi's opinion. 

"Yadi tujhe lagta hai vo overreact kar rahi thi toh use roka kyu nahi?" his mother asked instead. 

"Who am I to stop her..? Jana hai toh jaye.. Uska man hota rukne ka toh khud ruk jati.." he shrugged. 

"Toh tujhe itna bura kyu lag raha hai phir?" she cocked up her brows. 

"Kyuki itna sab required nahi tha.. Yaar.. Mom aap sawal mat puchiye!" he frowned. My baby! 

She came forward and sat next to him, "Acha baba nahi puchti.. Khana khale phir baat karenge.." Sidharth nodded and they carried on with food that was getting cold to later continue this conversation over a cup of coffee. 

"One reason is.. sometimes that she has a lot on her plate already and I can deal with what I'm going through.. so there's no need to stress her out more than she already is.. Maine kabhi analyse nahi kiya tha.. I am too old for her, she's almost a decade younger to me.. Ye misunderstanding nahi hai.. Ye toh basic acceptance hai Mom that she takes time to grasp what I've had and I realise that now.. We were in that flow or you can say in the moment.. Vo aur mai.. Hum sath me itne comfortable the aur sab kuch sahi lagta tha.. but I should have thought of the future.. Am I failing this relationship, Mom?" He fixed his eyes on his mother's face from his head in her lap, reading her expressions. She took a deep breath and smiled at the sweetheart her son was. 

"Sab kuch sahi isliye lagta tha kyuki sab kuch sahi tha! Beta ladai-jhagde are a part of life.. Hum unhe avoid karke apna rishta bacha rahe hote hai.. Lekin life aise nahi chalti.. Now that you are giving yourself a chance again and if you have chosen her for yourself then make sure you give her a fair chance to know you.. Vo accept karne me time legi toh dede time! Aakhir tujhe bhi toh open up hone ke liye time chahiye.. Aur age difference? Ye tujhe tab mehsus hua jab tum dono itne time sath the? Aur 4 mahine ko moment nahi bolte bache!" she explained and noticed his long lost face. He nodded, thinking about all her words. 

Shehnaaz on the other side had joined her school and her daily routine, except for the jogging. Skipping her workout for 3 days cost her when she resumed her dance academy in the evening. Her calves were hurting after the warm up and rehearsals. Well, she was mad at Sidharth, a lot, to even text him. It was her plan to make him talk it out, a way to punish him for those two hours she spent all alone on the beach, watching others enjoying themselves. And what about your impatient hands itching to text him? His mind mocked. Her mood wasn't good today because of the tiff last night and adding to it was Komal mam calling her in the office and giving an earful for not taking permission before her trip. 

"I texted Gaurav sir.." Shehnaaz said. 

"Tumne mujhse permission nahi li..! Gill there was a huge event on 12th on the occasion of Ganesh Chaturthi.. I wanted you to perform in it.. Do you realise you've missed an opportunity?" Komal scolded. 

"Yes mam.. I'm sorry.." Shehnaaz apologised and came out of her office with Gaurav. 

"Aapne bataya kyu nahi event ke bare me?" she asked him. 

"I didn't know about it either.. Komal suddenly came looking for you.." he replied apologetically and left. They casually choreographed songs and uploaded it in the academy's youtube channel, there was another such item being prepared. Gaurav asked if she was upset because of Komal and she immediately denied that. 

"Shehnaaz.. Bacha mujhe.." Ana screamed for help when Amit and Shubh were running after her, during their break. But Shehnaaz was sitting at a corner, totally uninterested in their banter. 

"Chal.. We're going to Domino's!" Ana invited her while they were in the changing room. 

"Nah.. Mera mann nahi hai.. Jao tum log.." Shehnaaz waved her off and walked out. She came back in the metro today as he didn't come to pick her up. She visited a couple of pandals, she prayed for their tiff to resolve as soon as possible and Sidharth to come back to her. She so wanted to go to Lalbaugcha Raja but not alone. She sighed and thought if he was going to talk to her on his own, it had been a day of avoiding him and he had made no efforts to talk to her. 

Wow.. It hurts. Well, it hurt more when he didn't return to his place. She was at her place, watching over to his apartment from her balcony and he hadn't returned. It could be a hospital emergency or he could have gone home, or... he wanted to avoid her? Did he take her seriously when she said she cannot be with him? She gulped down the thought with hope that he could be busy but her doubt didn't let her sleep and neither did Sidharth pick up her calls. Her heart shouted at her for saying those words to him last to last night, he was visibly avoiding her now and was in no mood to walk because he still wasn't receiving her calls. She kept an eye on her phone the entire day and cried inside. Craving for him. 

The next day, people could notice how she was unusually quiet and upset, "Sana.. Are you okay? Tumdono ki ladai hui kya?" Arohi asked, after noticing her roommate being exceptionally silent and dull the entire day. 

"Ha.. Vo call nahi utha raha.." Shehnaaz mumbled and looked away, letting a lone tear fall from her right eye. 

"Puthuuu..Don't cry na!" Arohi cooed, wrapping hands around Shehnaaz. 

"Kyu call nahi utha rahe doctor saab?" she asked. 

"Kyuki maine usko bola I cannot be with him.." Shehnaaz sobbed, resting her head on her roommate's chest. 

Her words made Arohi gasp, "What? Did..did you two break-up?" she asked further. 

"No! Mai.. Yaar mai bas chahti thi ke vo mere paas aake sab kuch share kare mere se.. Isiliye aisa bola.." Shehnaaz justified. 

"To tune usko dhamki di? You threatened him about breaking up?" Arohi questioned with an unbelievable look. 

"Ha.. Matlab nahi! Maine bas apna stand rakha! I want him to share things openly with me the way I do.. Mai kaise usko be-jhijhak sab batati hu.. Vo bhi batayega toh uska man halka hoga!" Shehnaaz cleared the allegation, justifying her words. She briefly revealed to Arohi what had happened in Goa so that she's not mistaken. 

"Oh.. I see it's complicated.." Arohi commented. 

"Hmm.. And he doesn't trust me.. Maine pehle bhi jhagda kiya tha iss topic pe.. Isliye vo mujhe nahi bata raha.." Shehnaaz added, disappointedly. 

"Nahi.. If your boyfriend is not sharing his problems with you..you're not at fault! He has just not adjusted well, or maybe he's still shy or introverted.. Ha?" Arohi said. 

"Pata nahi yaar.. Bolne me kya problem hai? Communication toh basic hoti hai na.." Shehnaaz sighed. 

"Manti hu.. Lekin sab itne vocal nahi hote na.. Kuch topics sensitive hote hai sabke.. Samajh rahi hai hai?" Arohi explained, caressing her hair. 

"Lekin maine usko bola tha mai judge nahi karungi jaisi bhi baat ho.. Abhi jo ho chuka hai uska mai kya karungi.. mai sach janna chahti thi.. Isiliye thoda insist kiya.. Zyada kar diya na maine? Dekhna! aaj ek bhi call nahi uthaya usne.." Shehnaaz replied and got back to her crying mode. 

"Arey baba.. Ek din hua nahi aur ye haal bana liya hai tune apna! Don't you think you're getting way too attached to him?" Arohi admonished her baby crying. 

"Toh kya karu mai? Vo hi hai ek mera yaha.. Meko baat karni hai usse.. Kal raat se dekha tak nahi hai usko! Ek din se zyada ho gaya hai..! Meri help kar sakti hai toh kar!" Shehnaaz snapped at her roommate, the strong feelings she had for Sidharth were too much to cause separation. She wanted to talk to him even after being mad at him and throw tantrums even when she's dying inside to hug him. 

"Ok..ok.. I'm not saying it's wrong.. Lekin jab hum kisi ko better feel karana chahte hai na.. Toh vo sirf uske bolne se nahi hoga.. Usko jab share karna hoga karne de.. You just make sure he rather feels happy and proud that he has someone to listen to his problems.. Tell him that no matter how hard the situation is.. you are there for him.. And you will stand by him and help him. Tell him that he can be open to you, you are his own! Jaise tune bola vo hi hai ek tera.. Usko bhi lagna chahiye tu uski hai.. If you make him feel like he can come to you no matter what and you won't freak out and act irrationally, I promise he'll start opening up at least a little more.." Arohi elaborated. 

"Ek baat batau?" she asked and Shehnaaz nodded like a child intently listening to her. 

"Sonal had not realised that she's.. You know.. Her sexuality.. She has always been a shy and timid girl from a narrow minded, middle class family.. Usne lesbian word kahi suna bhi nahi tha.." Arohi paused as she couldn't hold back the chuckle. "She was confused that she never really felt like dating a guy.. She literally cried when I confessed my feelings to her and asked me to stop all this drama.. Dar gayi thi vo.. Sana you won't believe she took 4 months to get normal to this fact and accept me! Lekin vo aaj bhi darti hai uske parents usko jaan se maar denge yadi unhe pata chal gaya toh.." Arohi said. 

"Aisa mat bol.. Aur dukhi na ho.. Maan jayenge uske parents.." Shehnaaz hugged her roommate, their case was indeed one big deal. 

"Let's hope so.. And my point was.. be there to support your partner.. Don't bug them about a resolution..Just keep showering all the love you can.. Ye maine seekha hai! Bas unko kabhi akela feel mat hone do.." Arohi concluded, making Shehnaaz understand.

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