"Remind me again, why are we going to this place, even though we don't have an occasion to go here?" I grunted. The restaurant itself wasn't a problem; the timing of bringing me here was the case.

"Oh just relax for tonight, Shawn! You are now not with him anymore, so enjoy it!" Joshua said, before gesturing me to sitting on the chair of the outdoor diner.

I sighed and sat quietly to the chair, while he was busy placing our orders to the waitress. He understood me too well, so much to the point that he doesn't even need to ask what would I eat in that diner.

I silently see the tropical setting of this place: it is just like what Iolani Luahine had done to the mainlanders' imagination about Hawai'i, with the tiki lights and the bartender wearing a lei upon her neck, while the performer would play some Don Ho and Auntie Alice's music using slack key guitars.

Joshua looked at me with hope on his eyes, while I was watching the happy couple softly dancing to the music. A few days ago, I would done the same thing with Xavier-my ex, but that was before he cheated on me with a chick. Yep, you heard it right: he was feeling "so empty and distant from me" that he had to cheat on me with a blondie in his apartment. And I don't even care how long he had been screwing that girl, or how much he said he was "sorry".

"Hey, are you okay?" Josh said, when saw me all moody and sad.

It is fine to be sad when people break up with you. But if you were saddened after breaking up with a cheater, that is not a reason to cry. For the least, that was what I think.

But what if that person was the one person that you love the most of all? The first love of your life?

"Shawn?"Josh whispered.

"Huh?" I asked, and he replied:

"You are drifting away." he said, and I shrugged it away.

"No, I'm fine."

Joshua sighed and attempted to encourage me to speak. It worked, since after some cliché encouraging lines I started to rant on about how much of a jerk Xavier was, and Josh was listening closely with some occasional nods.

Strangely, it was a bit cold in Hawai'i tonight, and we have to be mindful of where we were sitting, so that we don't get a cold from sitting outside in the glum weather.

As a Hawai'i Pono'i, I don't really get used to the cool weather of the mainland. But that doesn't mean my companion would not; funny enough, Josh actually likes that kind of weather. I mentally cursed for not bringing a jacket, which Joshua found really funny. If not, why is he smiling right now?

"You know you look adorable when scrunching your nose, right Shawn?"

Josh looked at me as he was trying his best to stop smiling, since he do understand that I am shivering because of the wind outside the windowsill.

Then, he walked to my seat, and wrap his varsity jacket onto my shoulders.

I blushed with his random act of kindness, and started to snuggle in his jacket. It has the smell of the ocean breeze from Hilo. Refreshing, yet it held so much charm inside it.

We had just finished our food, when my favorite song, Starlight In Hawaii, was playing at the center of the diner.

Josh quickly pulled me by the arm to the dance floor, much to my surprise.

I let him pulled me over there, cautious not to trip on the steps, without any resistance. Needless to say, I was more than surprised with his bold move. I mean, every other times that we hang out, he would really keep a distance with me, especially if we are in public. For God's sake, he wouldn't ever sit next to me on the Fasi's Limo when we were going places in the city!

But today, he was suddenly that much of a bold person and won't you look at that, he jumped out of the friend zone like nothing is going on in our lives:when we are both standing on the dance floor, he gently hold my hand, and we started slow-dancing to the music.

"What's with the romance?" I whispered into his ears.

"So that they know not to mess with a treasure like you," he answered. My light red blush turned into a rosy shade of pink.

What is going on with him? I mentally shouted.

The question was repeating through my mind, as the Hawaiian romantic songs from the Golden Ages started to play. We were slow-dancing at the diner, with the ukulele playing in the background, and I was blushing madly to Joshua, who continued to put me deeper into his never-ending pool of affection.

But inside that pool wasn't all just his attempt to pull me down. It was also my will to let myself sink into that affections: occasionally in the midst of the rendezvous, I would quietly sway my hip just slightly, just to earn back a mischievous smirk from my tall figure of a friend.

That became a little bit more of a common thing between us, the dancing routine and all of the romantic gestures. Heck, some people used to even ask us whether or not we are married.

After paying for the food and heading out, I grabbed his hand and told him as we were walking:

"It really was a great night."

"It surely was," said Josh, who was walking in front of me, but turned around and started to close the gap between us:

"And I really want this night to last..."

Then he did the unreal. He kissed me. For goodness sake, he kissed me.
His lips were on my lips, while his hands were ruffling my hair.
And in that moment, I felt like the world stopped rotating, and time stopped moving.

When our lips parted because of the need for oxygen, he whispered: "That was an awesome kiss."

I nodded, while keeping my head bowed low.

Joshua understood, that I am afraid. He knew that I'm afraid that I could lose him. Xavier gave me everything, and he took everything away from me. Now, the greatest fear for me, is someone will crumble my already broken heart.
"Hey, hey, look at me." Josh lifted my chin, and whispered, "I'm sorry, for letting you waste your youth on people who certainly do not love you as much as you love them."

I stood there, dumbfounded and struggling to process what he just said.
Why is he apologizing, while I was the person who caused pains for my own self?
"I'm sorry for letting you get yourself through so much pain, all caused by my ignorance and cowardice." He said.

Then he held my palms, as if I would disappear into sand grains in the middle of Ala Moana beach anytime.
"Shawn, I...am hopelessly in love with you." Josh blurted out those words, and my eyes went wide as he continued.

"I...have been in love with you...since the time when we were still in 7th grade."
He loves me, since when we were 12. And now, we both are 16. I never have suspected it, nor would I ever think about it. But now, he's here, putting his guards completely down.

He started to stumble from me and attempted to walk away, but I held him back.
"Don't." I said. "Stay here. Please."
"A-Are you sure?" he stuttered, and I nodded.
"Always."