" ": You talking

' ': You thinking

* *: Narrator/Voice-off

Your POV:

Okuyasu: Hell yeah, guys ! We just can't let it go this time ! there's just no way ! It's not bullying anymore if he just outright breaks his promises !

Josuke: You must think it would suck to share all that money... Why, is it because it's an important amount ? Is that it ?

Shigechi: This should do it, right ? If we think about it, y'all didn't do much... please accept this, from your dear friend. Think of it as an act of sympathy on my part... Now gimme my che-

Shigechi: BUGYAH !!

Josuke: Oh ! Eh ?! Hang on, Okuyasu !!

Okuyasu: Dammit, you dipshit ! I'm not gonna let you spout anymore stupid shit ! You agreed right in front of me to give us half of it ! You can't go back on your word, you greedy pig !!

"Okuyasu, I definitely don't think that's how you should use your 'The Hand'. Or maybe you want to rename it 'The Fist' ?"

Okuyasu: But that lunkhead just doesn't listen, no matter how much we try to reason with him !

"There still was no need to hit him that hard. Josuke, mind healing him ?"

Josuke: Yes... C'mon Shigechi, let's forget about our fight. And about the check, we'll be keeping at for now.

"In 3 days, when I'll have gotten the cash, I'll give you your half."

Okuyasu: Man, I'm so sick of this kid... Damn.

"There are people like him, that just can't hear what they don't want to. I think Koichi told us something like that about Yukako, right ?"

Okuyasu: We used to think of him as a friend, a comrade... But now it's over. I don't wanna see his face again. Him ? A friend ? Yeah right ! He can shove his "Friendship" right up his ass !

Josuke: I still think we should also think a little about our attitude. I mean, in a way, we sort of used him to get rich.

Okuyasu: You nuts ? I don't agree at all ! He would've never gotten this check without us ! He'd still be scavenging for 1 yen coins in drain pipes ! How could even hope to get 2,500,000 Yen ? By the way, that... Uhhhh, divided by three... Uhhhh

"Take the money, I don't need it. That makes 1,250,000 Yen for each of you two."

Josuke/Okuyasu: YEEAAAAAAAAAAAH !!!

Harvest: You won't have nothing !! I heard y'all ! I'm not happy ! You won't get nothing ! Not a single yen ! Yer Stands are poo ! Worth less than a big stinky fart ! We only got the 5 million because of Harvest !!

Shigechi: y'all can't do anything against harvest... Want proof ? Absolute proof ? I'll give you the proof !

Okuyasu: Still think I went too hard on him ?

"*Sigh* I'll be right back..."

Shigechi: D- Don't come any closer ! Take one more step, and I'll kill you !!

https://youtu.be/FSao4wRUHgA

Shigechi: U- UWAAAAH !!!

"So our Stands aren't worth shit, is that it ? Tell me, who had the idea to gather those coupons ?"

Shigechi: O- Okuyasu...

"Whaaat ? I can't hear that. Show a little more respect, would ya ?"

Shigechi: M- Mister Okuyasu, sir !!

"Good. I have another question now. Whose Stand fixed the ticket so that it was valid, huh ? Who wields Crazy Diamond, the Stand that can fix anything ?"

Shigechi: M- Mister Josuke !!

"Now final question. Whose name is on that check right here, making him the legitimate owner of the prize ? Come on, he also has you hanging by your collar."

Shigechi: I- IT'S MR. Y/N L/N, SIR !!

"Good ! Now how are you all gonna share that 5 million so allll of you can be happy ? Huh, Shigechi ? How ?"

Shigechi: Er... I'll give them half !

Josuke: Haaaaaaalf ? There's 3 of us here ! And you're still dividing by 2 ? Are you stupid ? Can't you see your calculations are wrong ?

Shigechi: Three shares... Yes ! that's it ! I'm just picking up the pieces... I was wrong ! We found that ticket together. We wouldn't have gotten this far without everyone's help ! That's true, I realize now... In fact, I was blinded by greed. We'll split this money evenly so nobody will feel cheated.

"You see you can get it if you want."

Josuke: that was quite the risk you took. What if he snatched the check and ran away ?

"It wouldn't have changed anything. It has my name on it, so I'm the only one who can claim the cash. I've seen enough bullshit to see through these kinds of bluff."

Josuke: HURRAAAAAAAH !!

Shigechi: MONEY WADS !!

Okuyasu: F- FIVE MILLION YEN !!

Employee: Now, sir, what will you do with this money ?

"You next line will be 'Why not place it here ? Safely inside Budogaoka bank ?' isn't it ?"

Employee: Why not place it here ? Safely inside Budogaoka bank ? Wait...

Josuke/ Okay, that's a deal !!

Okuyasu: We did it ! it's like a dream !

Shigechi: Wait... We said "Equal shares", right ? So that nobody gets riped off, right ? Something's not right ! We gotta include Stands when we split a deal if we wanna be fair !! Harvest counts for 500 men, so y'all only get 1/500th of the share ! that's logical, right ?

All: ... ... ...

Josuke: I can't believe this guy !!

Okuyasu: Again ? How long are you gonna keep this up ? I can't take it anymore !!

"His eyes were just filled with greed again..."

Shigechi: Gweeeeh !! Ok ! Ok ! Ok ! We'll split it into thirds !!

Josuke: Hmph. You sure you don't want a share ? I mean, it'll be way easier to divide it into 4 than 3.

"I'm fine, I told you. To be fair, I probably won't have any money-related problems for the rest of my life."

Okuyasu: What, being a teacher pays so well ?

"Not quite. You see, 10 years ago, when I stated I wanted to go traveling, Mr.Joestar heavily insisted to financially help me. So, yeah, money's not a problem for me. I just wanted to see where it'll lead."

Okuyasu: Wait a second... How many did he give you... ?

"Oh, something around... 10 million ?"

Josuke: Y- Yen ?

"Dollars. (Around 1 billion Yen)"

All three: ... ... ...

"Did I say something weird ?"

"WHAT DID I SAY ?!!!!"

Josuke: GET BACK HERE YOU BASTARD !!

Okuyasu: YOU WERE A MILLIONAIRE THIS WHOLE TIME AND NEVER SAID A THING !!!

"AAAAHHHHHHH !!"

Jotaro: ... Good grief, what did they find again...

Joseph: Ahh, being young again. They're practicing the Joestar secret technique together.

Girls: Excuse me, Mr.Kira... Mr.Kira ! Mr.Kira, if you're free... Would you like to have lunch with us ?

Yoshikage: I'm sorry, but I can't. If you'll excuse me, I need to deliver these documents. Some other time, perhaps...

Guy: Just give up already ! You don't want to date that guy, anyway. Let me put it this way... Kira Yoshikage, 33 years old, single. A man who does his job flawlessly, but has no passion at all. Due to his elegant manners and finely sculptured features, he's quite popular with the ladies. But when he's not at work, he's always running errands or making deliveries or whatever. Now, i'm not saying he's a bad guy, it's just that he's the most boring guy on the planet.

Yoshikage: Come on, why are you so angry ? Those girls only invited me for lunch. Of course I haven't forgotten my promise to eat with you. I turned them down, didn't I ? Have I ever broken a promise to you ? Hm ? Now... No need to worry. Won't you help me pick out some nice sandwiches ?

Yoshikage: What would you like to eat ? It's such nice, soft bread, isn't it ? This shop is famous for its sandwiches. They bake the bread fresh every day at 11 Am, and throw away whatever didn't sell by 1 Pm the bread's so fresh, you can feel its warmth even through the cellophane. And their tenderloin is freshly-fried so it's still crisp.

Yoshikage: Oh, no... You broke the wrapping and got sauce all over... What a naughty girl... ...

Yoshikage: Well, this sandwich has a hole in it, so let's buy the one behind it.

Yoshikage: Haaaa... What a beautiful Duwang *Chew*. I don't think you'd be able to find it anywhere else... it's just perfect for picnics.

Yoshikage: 'She's starting to smell... I wonder if it's time to cut off our relationship... Cut off... Heh heh. It might be time to make a short trip somewhere and find a new girl.'

*rustle*

Yoshikage: Only a dog...

Josuke: Oh !

Okuyasu: Shigechi !

Shigechi: Hey ! It's Josuke and Okuyasu !

Okuyasu: Hey... Nice timing, Shigechi.

Josuke: Got a favor to ask ! Could you spare a few bucks for lunch ? We kinda forgot our wallets !

Shigechi: What ?! Just what are you trying to pull here ? You two still have all that lottery money, right ?

Okuyasu: That's all tied up in our bank accounts, though. You don't want us to walk all the way to the bank every time we want to eat lunch, do you ? Come on, just 1000 Yen will cover us.

Shigechi: What about Y/n then ?

Josuke: he's been avoiding us lately. I think he just instinctively knows that we're gonna ask him for money every now and then.

Okuyasu: Please ? We'll pay you back after school.

Josuke: Hey, that bag... Sandwiches from Saint Gentleman ? Aren't they always sold out by now ?

Shigechi: No way ! This is my lunch ! Fine... I'll lend you the 1000 yen... But I'ma put it on your tab so you don't forget about it !

Okuyasu: Aren't you the one always forgetting things ?

Josuke: Well, anyways, thanks a bunch Shigechi ! We'll pay you back.

Shigechi: Let's see... June 24th, lent 1000 Yen... "Lent" ? It's "Kasu"... What's that kanji again ? Um... Whatever ! I'll just write it in Hiragana. I bet they couldn't read the Kanji anyway. Huh ?

Shigechi: Where the hell... Is my sandwich ?!

Shigechi: 'Oh, it's all the way over here. I must have set it down here and forgotten about it.'

Yoshikage: What ?!

Shigechi: Heeey, Josuke !, Okuyasu ! Wait up !! I want you guys to sign this IOU !

Yoshikage: 'I can't believe it ! That kid mistook my bag for his ! And if he were to open it...'