First of all I'd like to address that this will be a long post. Even though I know a lot of people don't like reading long things (I am definitely one of those people), I ask that all of you, friends, family, whatever, read this post. It means a lot. :)

Last night, I was going out with my mom, her boyfriend, his son, and my sister.
Since I normally like to wear more masculine clothes(flannels, polos, button ups, etc), I decided that I wanted to wear something more feminine. So I put on one of my favorite A-line dresses and looked in the mirror.
I kid you not, I thought I looked so ugly in this dress that I immediately changed out of it and into a flannel. And this was the same dress that got me a lot of compliments from my friends whenever I wore it.
Somehow though, even if I did get a lot of compliments from that dress, I still felt ugly and uncomfortable wearing it.
This is because I have bigger arms and broader shoulders. I don't know why, but I ended up this way.

And that's just the start of my list of insecurities.

When I was in elementary school(which seems like forever ago), a boy who I will leave anonymous used to say that I had a "pig snout" and a "round face". And when I was that age, it was also considered to be unattractive to be a curvier girl. So I went into one of the worst stages of depression I've ever been in. I used to be bullied so much that I would come home and cry for hours, and I still have the scars from me scratching at my arms until they were raw.

Another thing I used to hate about myself was how boring and frizzy my hair was. It used to stick out on top and at the sides, and it used to have no volume to it. I remember someone telling me it looked like I had a paper bag wrapped over and around my head.

And guys, I'm not telling you all this for pity. And definitely not to make people feel sorry for me. I'm saying all this now because I recently felt a huge wave of confidence come over me, one I've never felt before. My close friends made me realize that I don't need a million compliments to know that I'm attractive. I just need to love who I am, for who I am.

Today, I made the most realistic drawing of myself I've ever done. I used to avoid drawing what I hated about myself so that I could project how I really wanted to look. But right now I just don't care about that anymore.

A lot of times during this year, my mom told me that I wasn't allowed to date until I'm 16. And I used to think it was one of the most unfair things I've ever heard from her. I thought, "I'm responsible. Doesn't she trust me?" And she does. She just doesn't trust everyone else because they're not ready for ME. Not because I'm not ready for THEM.

From now on, I'll live by this; If you're going to love me, you'll love my hair, my curves, my face, my crazy personality, and every imperfection I have. Because if you don't, as I said, YOU'RE not ready for ME.

I want every single one of you to promise me this. Promise that you'll never judge how beautiful you are based on what everyone else thinks about you, because you're beautiful, no matter what. <3

~Aly