Ok.. my dad... 
it's been over 2 years
He's not dead... my parents haven't divorced
He lives somewhere else... I only see him for about 2 days every 1-2 months
It's hard for us to get money... cause he has to have money to live
And my mom works a lot
So i just get dropped off home then she goes back to work until 5pm
This all happened back in 2014
I wasn't "poor"
We had a lot of money actually
I thought we didn't need to worry about anything
Until my dad lost his job
I left school because my parents made us move
We somehow still had enough money to go to school
That wasn't fun at all
I got badly bullied there
I didn't tell my parents though
I had one friend though
Her name was Ally
I'm never gonna forget her
Again
We moved
To where I am now
In October 2014
I don't know how we had enough money considering both of my parents didn't work
Then I came to this school I am still in
It was
Rough at start
I did get bullied
For my accent, teeth and hands
I mean
It hurt more than expected
Considering I was only 8 at the time
Then in February 2015
My dad got a job!
But..
It was in another city
Considering I would barely see him
I got to see him for 2 days every 2 weeks
Then in 2015 October
My friend
I thought she was my friend
She just
All of a sudden hated me
I don't know what has wrong with me
Was it... because of my weight? My hair? My voice? The way I act?
It wouldn't of been so bad if she didn't take all my friends away
I only had her, Hayley and another girl
They were my only friends
I would've made new friends
I tried
But no one likes me
Now I didn't have any
It went like this until...
About march 2016
Hayley stopped hanging out with her
Me and Hayley were still friends at the time
We just...
Didn't hang out
But she started to hang out with me
And we got along
Then this girl
Hera
She came to our school
In November 2016
I was gonna make friends with her
I was about to say something
Until this click of 4 girls
Uh... Jenna, Emily, Orla and Cara
Went up to talk to her
So... me and Hera didn't become friends
All of a sudden
Hayley becomes her friend a month later
So of course I had to hang out with her
Now it's just... I guess stayed like this for a bit?
But I have noticed a few things going around this year
I said I had depression last year and I did
But it wasn't that bad
But I've realized something has been going on with me
Sometimes at school I've been having a few things going on with me
Like panic attacks ( crying, can't breathe, heart pounding and other things )
But I tried being as quiet as possible during it
Because I didn't want anyone looking at me
I hate being started at
Being embarrassed
Laughed at
It just caused my heart to pound faster and faster and I find it very hard to breathe when it happens
I've told my mom about it
She doesn't do anything to help me
But she has been letting me stay home some days
Which i am very thankful for

I had other friend called Beth but I didn't like her
She said things to me I don't want to say because it's personal

So yeah
Vent
Of my life for the past nearly 3 years

Don't take this is as me trying to get attention please