Now, you have to understand. Miles and Denise were somewhat wowed by celebrity but not too much. They were related to so many, like I was. They'd kind of gone on the same journey with my parents as they rose to stardom, but the girls, well, they were completely shell shocked. This was a different than family band completely, and big-- Axis was extremely popular right now, and had been for ten or so years, so they had lots of songs the girls knew. The thunder of the bass guitar and the drums was heard from here, and then Rafe's voice, that incredible strong falsetto, he could bring down the house. Everybody was screaming, The atmosphere was electric.

Rafe howled. It was a signature move and both girls, wide eyed and laughing turned as I howled back for good measure. Miles was laughing too, as he ushered me up the stairs. I was sure he'd been back stage many, many times. He didn't seem even slightly phased.

Allen said that Rafe was just winding down, his ballads were next. "Do you want to go out there? Join him again? That was so dope when you guys sang together."

All eyes turned to me. I shook my head, feeling the electricity again. The closer I got the more mesmerized I became. Allen led us to the edges of the stage, up stairs, and behind metal bars and the frames of the big screens. I could see the lights, feel the humidity. I wasn't prepared to see him in this setting again and I knew as soon as I did I would be under his spell, and family or no family, I would belong solely to Rafe.

Allen saw this and took us closer.

He indicated for a bouncer to come over, two of them did. He leaned in and told him something, and he shook his head and eyed both me and the girls, then he spoke into his walkie-talkie communicator--- looked like something off of Star Trek. He came back up and led me and the girls to the edge of the stage, just like it had been last night, there was a spot where it wasn't nearly as far away from the crowd. Rafe was sitting dangling his feet over the edge, cooling off. The bouncer hefted me up suddenly and started down the final steps. We were one with the crowd again, and I didn't see what happened to anyone else.

Rafe was listening at his ear piece. I wondered if they talked to him from there? Was that possible? I held on tight. This guy was slippery, rounded shoulders, very unlike Juan's had been. We got down to the crowd and it parted for someone as big as him, and as forceful. And singing, Rafe must have gotten some kind of clue. He looked over as if he sensed me close and simply got up and came over to the side, the same as last night.

He was so unfamiliar though, having just been with others all evening. He was wearing a black t-shirt, red jeans, and blue sneakers, and his hair was dripping sweat. He reached for my hand. Still singing, still holding the mike in one hand, he plucked me up and I scrambled up on the stage. He held me close in one hand, and walked back to the center.

I was not prepared to be here.

I think my insides were shaking. Rafe was still singing, this beautiful ballad. Then he told the audience how lovely I was, a true fan. He said he'd had a girl on stage last night in Mexicali and he thought he might do it every night on the whole tour. He wasn't usually much of a talker on stage, but now he was saying he liked the idea of letting me sing with him, and maybe some others. He had me sit on the stool in front of the drums, which were still playing, as were the guitars and synthesizers. Now he went back and got another girl, who wasn't as quiet as me, but who was jumping all over him. Then he got Shayla, and then he went between us and sang to each of us equally the most beautiful parts of his ballad rocker. The girl was screaming, but Shayla was singing---- and I was singing, and Rafe left the other girl and went and sang with Shayla.

"I don't normally do this." He said, handing the screaming girl back to the bouncers. "But my fans are amazing. Give a round of applause to the fans!" he was hugging Shayla, he gave her a kiss and then he came to me, and kissed me soundly.

"So, I have a confession to make. I said there was a girl on stage last night, and some of you may have seen that show, or that part on YouTube already, but you'll notice--- it's the same girl." He held up my hand and I covered my mouth with my other fingers. Rafe was actually pulling me to the front of the stage, and the music had changed, he was singing a new song:

"Forever can never be long enough for me
Feel like I've had long enough with you
Forget the world now we won't let them see
But there's one thing left to do

Now that the weight has lifted
Love has surely shifted my way
Marry me
Today and every day
Marry me
If I ever get the nerve to say
Hello in this cafe
Say you will
Mm-hmm
Say you will
Mm-hmm"

He announced that the song was actually by Train, and that he was borrowing it to sing to his beautiful fiancé. He held my hand and kissed my fingers as he knelt and sang the last verse over again--- and then the music did die out and the lights died out and he held the microphone to both of our lips and we sang it one more time together, and I sang the melody and he blended a beautiful harmony and the audience went wild.

The lights came up and Rafe kissed me, holding me the way he does, very intimate as the stadium fell away and he insinuated his amazing energy into every fiber of my being, then he lifted me back to the bouncer on the floor, and finished the concert with two amazing rockers and me swaying on the guy's shoulders in the lights.

Backstage that night was poignant. Uncle Miles spoke to Rafe as if he were my dad, really sweetly. He let me know that he was there for me, and for us. We were family---- the family. Nothing was going to happen to change that. He welcomed Rafe to the family--- shook hands, explained about my beliefs and usurped his time unashamedly, while Holli freaked out, saying we had to keep moving and there wasn't time for all this. Other people wanted pictures, other people's needs were more important. Allen came and got us, and I said goodbye to my family rather tearfully--- the high emotion of the evening getting to me.

Then as I walked back to see how the after stuff was going Allen took me to Rafe's side. "I'm okay." I said. "I don't need to barge in."

Allen tapped his ear buds, and chewed his gum. "He says he wants you."

I could see this annoyed Holli no end. "I think I can wait back at the bus."

Rafe turned. "Aubrey." He reached for me just as I would have turned to disappear. "Be with me, baby."

I smiled as flashes went off all around us. "I can wait at the bus."

"No, baby, I need you now and forever." He kissed my cheek, and more flashes went off. "Just a couple more minutes and we'll be out of here."

I smiled as close to non-tremor status as possible. I knew he planned to go dancing, but I felt exhausted. I hoped plans had changed, as this stuff seemed to be going on forever. But it turned out that plans had not changed. We took the bus back over the border to Nogales, and the band members and a few significant others, not gleaned from groupies and fans, I assumed, ate dinner at the famous Cave--- a real Cave that had been popular in the 1940's, then closed for repairs, and now reopened for exclusive dinner and dancing. They had an area set aside particularly for both, since the restaurant had to stay open late to accommodate us.

Rafe was ushered along by Holli. He took pictures with beautiful young girls, smiling, not talking, but gracious. He signed autographs, he took more pictures. And all the while Holli was scowling fiercely, pushing us to order, pushing us to get on with it. No more pictures, we were in a hurry!

I didn't understand that. It was dinner, the concert was over, I was not sure why she wanted everything to be over so quickly. It seemed like she wasn't having fun at all, especially now that Rafe had changed things up with me. I felt her glowers turned my way more than once.

For some reason Dylan was my table guest. He had his arm around the chair back of a lovely young woman, I didn't catch her name, but one with a great figure, long thick black hair, and tanned shoulders revealed above her silky smooth sparkling white and gold dress. Her jewelry was stunning. I thought she might be one of the prettiest young girls I had ever seen.

Rafe was silent, watching everybody, his mind on something else. But I felt like I needed to ask Rafe what was up with Holli.

He turned to me pensively. Quietly, he spoke. "This area isn't safe. Tomorrow we will be in Ciudad Juarez and El Paso. There was talk of cancelling the concert. We may not have enough security."

I was shocked. I'd never heard that Northern Mexico wasn't safe. "Why are we out then? We could stay on the bus and---"

He put his arm around me. "It's not so bad here. Way worse in Juarez."

"Why don't I know that?"

"There hasn't been as much about it in the news these past few years, since the new governor of Chihuahua has upped security and tightened law enforcement against the cartels. But there are still murders, if not as many kidnappings."

"Kidnappings?" I felt my heart plummet, really? I felt like a rug was pulled out from under my feet. My dad had always made us feel so safe, we never went anywhere unsafe. He didn't take chances, and still there had been weird things in our family. Enough, that I was seriously fearful.

"Not so many anymore. It's why this is our first tour of Mexico. It really hasn't been safe up till now. Holli is still just worried about tomorrow." He took a sip of his water. "This place--- is cool. It's just closed in. I was thinking about safety and stuff and the thought hit me that this place is not easily defensible. It's just these big caverns with lots of people.... Well, anyway." He patted my leg as he stretched a little. "It's all good. I just had a weird feeling, but I feel okay now."

"We don't have to go clubbing." I said hurriedly.

"And miss the incredible night life here? Nah. We've been clubbing here before. This isn't a bad place. We don't have to be out long if you're worried."

*******