Kai: hey, future fake girlfriend. want a lift to school tomorrow? I promise not to crash into anything, if that was a concern for you
Valerie: that would be very handy actually. my car is in the shop, and my usual rides are backstabbing whores
Valerie: but i will be wearing a seatbelt, and maybe taking a Valium to calm my nerves. or I could pay for you to install a back camera? let me know what will be the most helpful in avoiding a fiery and painful death
Kai: well, i won't offer you a lift if you're going to be sassy
Valerie: you know you love my sassy
Valerie: lover
Kai: i think i might have regrets
Valerie: i do think that's very healthy for you
Valerie: mistakes help us to learn
Kai: hey, at least i never dated tommy aster
Valerie: it hurts bc it's true
Kai: it's okay, we can all be bewitched by a set of rockin' abs
Kai: which is why you decided to rebound with me
Valerie: i have seen none of your rockin' abs. i have no evidence at this time. send pics or it doesn't count
Kai: wow, take me out to dinner first, LV. i feel so used.
Valerie: that's... kind of the whole point of our arrangement. i'm using you as eye candy to make my exes jealous
Valerie: plus, i already showed you a whole boob; i think we'd be even
Kai: i am not sending you ab photos
Valerie: boo
Valerie: that's okay. i'm sure with enough hard work you'll be able to see at least one someday!
Kai: i didn't know you were mean. why did no one ever tell you me that?
Kai: i'm taking this up with cora
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