Giving it a chances.. Learning from my mistakes.. How? How do I do it if it hurts..

I'm not the one who can make her happy.. I'm not the one who can make her smile.. I've never been the one.. It was him.. Just him.. Not me.. I've promise myself I will never say anything about this because I don't want them to be hurt.. Because I don't want to hurt them.. It pains me from the very start when I know.. I've finally been replace.. I've finally lost my one true place..

Even though the both of them said it wasn't true.. They wasn't pushing me away.. But I can see it straight trough.. I've been replace for good.. I don't need anyone to tell me to make me realize.. I can see straight through.. He make her happy.. While I make her sad.. He make her smile.. While I make her cry.. We're the complete opposite..

I'm always hidden as a shadow behind his bright self.. I wasn't the one glowing in front of her.. But he is.. I wasn't the one who she keeps on occupying herself with.. It's him.. I wasn't the one she shared her secrets with.. It's him.. And it'll always be him.. Not me.. Not now.. Not ever..

I know it for a long time now.. Yet I hide my feelings.. Let the pain consume me.. Keep it all to myself.. Let myself drown from the pain.. So they can be happy.. So he can continue to make her smile..

I've been casted away.. And fully aware of it.. I know.. He's just the best thing that have ever happen to her.. Not me obviously.. It's just him.. He's like a magic that shine it's way into her life.. While me?.. I'm just the creeps of darkness that's invading her life..

Even if I've lost her.. I've lost the special spot in her heart.. And will never get it back.. I'm still happy and still am that I've met her..

I love her.. But i will never be the special one for her.. I never will anymore.. Not now.. Not ever..