The next day, I dragged myself out of bed, my mind crowded by the memories of the night previous. I remembered the morbid thoughts that flowed through my head, the feeling of utter hopelessness and despair... Most of all, however, I thought of the blood. Oh, yes, the blood; the way it flowed out of the cuts on my wrists, how it dripped into the sink with the tap tap tapping of my will to live draining away. I had known that it was bad, horrible, even, to hurt myself like that, but deep down, it felt right. I deserved to be in pain. I deserved to bleed.

Sighing, I quickly got dressed and walked out the door. As I kicked it shut behind me, I saw a note flutter to the ground. I picked it up, and scanned it over. It was what I had expected- Yukio had left it, stating that he had left the dorms overnight on a mission and that I had better be to school on time. I sighed, and let the paper drift to the ground. I started towards the school, my whole body tense. I walked quickly, simply wanting it to be over with. I strode through the crowds, which over the last couple weeks had parted for me. I heard people muttering as I passed:

"What the hell happened to him...? He always used to be so cheery..."

"I know. He started acting like this one day for no reason..."

"Something must have happened to him..."

"I dunno, he always was strange. Plus, I heard his dad died when he was fifteen. Maybe it finally got to him and he lost it..."

"Psycho..."

I kept my head down, attempting to block out their comments and the sweet smell of the blood pumping through their veins. The smell blotted out everything else, absorbing it and crushing it into insignificance. Rather than letting instinct take over, I focused on my own heartbeat and attempted to block it out. I still struggled, however, and barely made it to cram school without lashing out.

My relief when I finally walked into Demon Pharmaceuticals, my final class of the day, was shortlived. As I walked in, I saw the word 'Mission' scrawled in Shura's sloppy handwriting on the chalkboard. At the front of the room Yukio stood, cleaning and loading his pistols. His hair was a bit scruffed up and he had circles under his eyes, undoubtedly from not sleeping the night before. Shura stood next to him, and glanced in my direction as a greeting as I walked in. I silently stared back, having caught anger in her look. She was obviously still angry about what happened the morning previous.

I walked to my seat, slumping down in my new corner of the room. I saw a couple glances come my way, but I didn't meet anyone's gaze. A part of me hoped that if I didn't make eye contact, no one would approach me. I didn't want to hurt them. Another part, however, just wanted to be able to sit with Shiemi again, have friends, rather than hiding away from them.

"So, today, as is written on the board, we are going to be venturing out to a warehouse district just outside of True Cross." Yukio paused, and pushed his glases up his nose. He shuffled his papers briefly, and continued. "They have reported an unidentified entity in the form of a young woman causing havoc. She has reportedly caused the dissapearance of a worker, Yui Otohatara, and has the owners worried about safety. They had to close the warehouses temporarily, and called us in. We are expected to be there in about two hours, and we are planning on getting there a bit early to scout out the area. I expect that everyone has their supplies?"

Everyone nodded or voiced their readiness, and I simply gave a halfhearted yes. Shura pushed herself off of the wall she hd been leaning on, and discarded the beer can she had been drinking out of.

"M'kay, everyone, the van is waitin' outside. Yukio, lead the group and get everyone situated." Shura's voice was slurred, and she was obviosly drunk; that didn't stop anyone, however, and they all obediently followed her instructions. I stood and began to follow them as well, but Shura grabbed my arm and held me back. After everyone had already left, and slammed the door behind her. She gave me a glare, and pulled out another beer can. After a moment, she put it down and spoke.

"Ya ain't gonna be gettin' yer sword back fer this mission, I hope ya know. An' don't ya go expectin' ta jus' go with the rest of 'em. I have half a mind ta not let ya go in the mission at all. But that Vatican was told a yer strange behaviour. Yer walkin' a thin line, kid. They said that if ya don't do anythin' a worth on this mission..." She dragged her finger across her neck in a slicing gesture. The meaning was obvious; the Vatican didn't care if I was a brain-dead zombie. As long as I could get the job done, they would keep me around. If I couldn't, however, I would be of no use to them. I would be eliminated like the worthless bug that I was to them, and my existence would be brushed under the rug. They would act as if I hadn't existed at all.

"Okay," I said quietly. I silently rushed out of the room, my hands in my pockets. Elimination was a possibility. I feared being killed by the Vatican; I didn't want to die now. That eternal darkness seemed reassuring. It would envelop me like a dark blanket, and I would never have to feel anything again...

I walked to the bus outside, and boarded with the rest of the group. I was seated next to Shiemi, who gave me a slightly nervous smile. I sat at the window seat, as far from her as possible. In the same respect, she sat on the edge of the seat, attempting to stay as far from me as possible. As the bus drove through the city and we reached the outskirts, the smell of the city and its residents dulled, as did the scent of blood. I stared out the window, my muscles relaxing slightly as buildings streaked past us. The rest of the cram class murmured quietly among themselves as I stared silently and tuned my ears in to their conversations. Only fragments of them were captured, but I didn't mind.

"...so she slapped me, and told me to stop trying to get with her!" Shima chuckled quietly. "Then-"

"Ugh, no one wants to hear your stories of girls turning you down. We have heard plently of them during the year and a half we have been stuck with you." As she spoke, I could practically hear the the roll of Izumo's eyes.

"Aww, c'mon, don't ruin the mood, man..."

I smiled sadly. I missed hanging out with them so much... All I wanted was to be normal. I just wanted to be an average student, to have the ability to trust myself to be around people... I just missed it so much... Little did I know, however, that was the last time I would ever have to worry about that. My whole life was about to go downhill, and I didn't even realize it. There was no way I was prepared for what was going to happen. and there was no turning back; my fate was set, and there was nothing I could do to change it.