With only about a week to go until Manish left, it was safe to say that I was not the happiest camper around. I felt like my mood is slowly declining, like you're going down a flight of steps as slow as you can, trying to piss the previous person off.

Nothing had been going my way for the past couple of days. I just felt so tired. I didn't feel like myself at all. I never got sick, so it wasn't that. I just wasn't the same anymore. Everytime I tried to dance to one of my favorite songs, I just didn't enjoy it as much.

I felt like someone had taken a vacuum cleaner and sucked all the fun out of that. I wanted nothing more to sleep, and I just wasn't as hungry anymore. It felt like puberty, just 150 times worse.

    "You seem down, Jaya. You doing okay?" Ananth asked me, as he hit the birdie with the badminton racket. I just hit it back, watching it fly in the air and head towards Ananth, like an actual bird.

Except this one doesn't poop on your car windows.

"To be honest, no. I feel like shit. Isha has just been sticking her porcupine cactus spines in my ass, and it feels like getting a shot at the doctor's with a serrated knife. If he ever does that, I'm going to take that knife, an archery bow, and aim it straight at Isha's throat. It will shut her up nice and good."

Ananth looked at me with a slight look of horror on his face, but I kind of just think that he shouldn't have expected less. "Okay, I totally get why you hate Isha. That girl is like someone decided to take Satan's sperm, fertilize Medusa's egg, and place it in Mother Gothel's womb. But are you sure that's the only reason you feel like rabbit shit?"

I kind of sighed at the fact that everyone can read me like a book for the past couple of days. I had felt like someone has been dragging me through a pile of mud for the past couple of days. Things have just not been going my way. And Ananth was completely right in this case.

Isha sticking her cactus face in my life was causing me to feel like I'm going to hell at this point. But we both knew that's just not all. "Fine. I'm depressed about Manish leaving. Give me a goddamn break here, Ananth. He's my best friend. You saw how impactful he was in my life. You really think that this is easy for me? I feel like absolute shit."

Ananth's face turned to a much more empathetic one once he saw my side of how he's feeling. "Okay, I totally get you. I'm gonna miss Manish too. And I know that Isha hasn't been making your life easier. But you can still FaceTime him, Skype him, text him.... It really isn't that bad."

That was the point.

It was.

It was never going to be the same. It was not going to be the same as having each other over, watching movies such as Love, Simon, Mission Impossible, or anything else we could get our hands. We wouldn't be able to browse IMDB for hours, looking for movies to watch and laugh, cry, or scream over.

I can't watch Humpty Sharma ki Dulhania, Badlapur, or Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara for the thousandth time without him, a big bowl of popcorn, and a nice glass of soda to go with it. That's not going to be able to happen when he's not around.

I didn't know what I'm going to do, but I knew that it's time to start appreciating Manish for just bringing an element of joy to my life.

***********

    After listening to my playlist for the hundred thousandth time, I knew it's time that I have to go outside to get some fresh air. Otherwise, my stomach starts to hurt, and I feel dizzy. I mean, Isha's cactus face causes me enough pain already, so the fresh air gives me some relief from the sting of her needs in my life, heart, face, and other parts where she knows she will cause pain and just pure discomfort. And just breathing in the fresh air is just super relaxing for all parties involved.

As I sat right outside of my house, I could pretty much smell the scent of bitch radiating from the air. After dealing with so much of it, the smell is pretty much distinct. I knew that this isn't going to be good, so I had to watch my back just in case one of the bitches I smelled decides to bite me in the back and give me rabies.

I could feel the fur of them coming closer, and then one of them barks, "Looking lonely there, Jaya. Looks like I should give you some company." The voice was as distinct as someone speaking my mother tongue. I held my breath in and turned around to face the Cactus Nose itself. She had her usual haughty look on her face, to which I just rolled my eyes. Her arms were crossed, and her eyes were looking into mine, as if she was Satan looking straight into my soul.

"Fuck off, Isha. I'm not in the mood for your bullshit today."

Isha's smile grew wider, which only meant more danger. "Music to my ears. Gotta love when you're in a bad mood."

I just got up and kept on walking in an attempt to bore her so that she could finally get off of my back. Out of all the things that I needed today, I needed some peace and quiet. The last thing I needed were her cactus spines stabbing me in the back constantly. "I know why you're upset and trying to avoid me. I know that you're upset about my brother leaving. I was upset at first, but then when I realized it was making you miserable, everything was so much better. Knowing that you were going to be miserable without him just  brought me so much comfort."

Anger boiled inside of me like an active volcano. I didn't resort to physical violence a lot, but I was one word away from tackling her right there in the street and beating her face until her jaw and nose broke.

I had to keep my control intact though, because if I broke her nose, then she would go crying to Manish and her parents that she did nothing wrong and I lashed out at her for no reason and beat her ugly face until she could taste her own bones.

Rajiv Uncle and Sandhya Aunty would believe me and take my side if I told my side of the story, but God knows what Manish would do if he found two conflicting sides of the story. That messiness already happened two years ago, and I didn't need that in my life again.

"I was upset too, but then I realized that Manish is going to be far away from you. Honestly, that would make anybody happy. If I was moving away from you and I didn't have to see your face again, I'd throw a fucking wedding sized celebration. Knowing that Manish is away from your toxic ass is so reassuring, because I know that he's going to become a better person when he's away from you."

Isha, appearing to be unfazed, just held her head up high. I knew that her cowardly ass couldn't handle being talked back to, so I hoped that she would finally shut her fat mouth and go back to the animal shelter, where she came from. "You know, it's reassuring for me too. It makes me happy that Manish is going to be far away from you. You're nothing but a bad influence on my brother, and I know that more than anyone. I'm supposed to be the one that's supposed to protect him, and especially from people like you. My brother doesn't need to be poisoned with people like you and Jen in his life. Him moving away is just a way to protect himself from you and your demeanor. Because being around you is making me want to vomit. Manish must have a huge tolerance to people like you."

For the first time, ever, Isha's words felt like someone shoved a thick, hot needle in my heart. I knew what Isha was saying was probably not true, because Manish always told me how much I meant to him and how much I improved his life, but the way Isha worded it was like someone had kicked me in the chest. I hid my hurt, and then said, "You know, I don't know how Manish puts up with you either. If I was Manish, then I would rather have my kidneys fail again then have you as my sister. Dealing with you as a person is enough to make me want to throw myself out of a window. And the fact that you want your own brother to leave because it brings someone else's misery to make you happy? You're sick. I don't know about you, but I actually appreciate your brother and my own. Next time, you should learn to appreciate your siblings more, because I know that Manish loves you a lot. And it's sad that you take advantage of that."

I started to walk back to my house, and I can pretty much feel Isha's shock coming off of her body. I won this battle, but not without some casualties that came along with it.

After getting inside of my house, her words rang inside of my head like church bells. I was firm on my belief that they weren't true, but the fact that they stung so much was something that nobody has really been able to achieve in the past couple of years.

I knew that Isha had been having a wonderful life from her parents, because Manish lovingly couldn't keep his mouth shut about everything that goes on in his house. Even then, it still bugged me how she could hate me so much.

Even after I was not causing any harm, in any form, to him.