Rant alert!!

Brush Strokes, to start, I'll tell you I changed the title thrice after publishing. It was a funny thing seriously and one of my friends who was reading it almost killed me when I changed it the third time. But I guess, third time is luck. I was able to somehow make the title blend in with the story. It definitely worked much better than Your Eyes Tell as it was before.

The base of the story, the first scene I ever imagined for this book was the prologue. The moment I thought of the main characters' first meeting, I knew I had to write it with Kim Taehyung because he really has beautiful eyes that can tell you everything and nothing all at once. They are as soulful as his voice but for an artist who uses colours, obviously I had to focus more on his eyes throughout the book, which I hope I succeeded in.

If you've read the 'A few words' chapter of After Hours, you would know that when I was planning the series, this book was supposed to be the first. I didn't care for you know, following the age thing, oldest to youngest while writing. I didn't even think about it. I write completely based on the characters and the storyline.

That being said, I even though about exchanging the male leads and books while planning. I won't say who I was going to pair with Aera but it wouldn't have worked out as good as it did with Taehyung. It was a cliche choice, the artist x Taehyung plot which has been used a lot, most of the times Taehyung being the artist. But since, he was going to remain as an idol, obviously Aera became the artist. In the end though, I guess, you can say I have penchant for giving cliche plots and concepts my own touch.

Coming to characters, let's talk about Aera. I knew I wanted her to be the extravagant, social butterfly type of girl who everyone finds cringe and is the 'bitch' in every y/n book. That character really needed some justice.

Aera is like the representation of the line 'brightest smiles hide the most pain', so I really wanted to give her a very traumatic past. Like, from what I've perceived, it's very common for people to tease or bully someone because of what their parents do or did. In her case, though I expressed it through only a few lines, she was looked at as if she would someday become a murderer as well and it's really disheartening. But she turns out pretty good despite her dark past.

She smiled and laughed a lot through the book, she even tried to please everyone around her but still didn't accept rude behaviour, a point you can consider as growing up from all the toxic shiz. But, when she found the right person to confide in, she didn't hold back either.

Through Aera, I've honestly been able to figure out so much about a person. Like, Aera isn't perfect. She must be the most imperfect character you might've read or I might've ever written. She's indecisive, impulsive, but still somehow thinks rationally but at the wrong place. She's also often ignorant and a little self centred when it came to feelings. It was like looking myself in her because somewhere we all are like that. No one is perfect and that's the beauty in it.

Initially, this was going to be a really fluffy romance filled with cheesy shit as you can tell from the first few chapters but as I continued writing and improvising her character I had this sudden realisation, epiphany of sorts and the whole plot changed. At some point, there were so many flaws in Aera that I decided to show them more and show how she matures through it. It was like discovering different sides of her and embracing them all to make her stronger. So, we went from a childish, indecisive person to a mature woman who was finally free of her vices and knew what mistakes shouldn't be repeated.

I can proudly say that, despite the plot holes my decision to explore human nature like that through Aera was a turning point, the best point for me as a writer. If I were to give this book a rating out of 10 I would give it 3 honestly because it's really not that good. But writing this book helped me immensely to look at things differently.

Coming to Taehyung now, I had so so so so much difficulty writing his character. When I first started writing, I was absolutely clueless what kind of person he is. To an extent I knew but not completely, not the way I know other members. All I ever did was appreciate him as an artist because he is truly a gem who needs to protected but I didn't know anything about his personality.

I could relate to a few things actually because we have the same zodiac sign and the ability to know about a person upon meeting them, like a gut feeling. But apart from that I really had no idea of what kind of person he is. So, I had to do so much research. I watched so many videos about him but it was still difficult and I think that shows since the lack of chapters from Taehyung's pov. Most of his monologues are all based around Aera while Aera thinks more about herself because obviously she was in a difficult situation.

I could cut a mark for that because I still have absolutely no idea how to describe Taehyung. If I were to give him a fictional personality it would work wonders but since I tried staying close to reality... well, you know what happened 😅

Anyways, he is ze good guy in the story, the lovesick fool who is desperate for the female lead's attention but is also afraid to lose her completely. That explains the kiss in the 31st chapter. LoL.

But I do think that Taehyung would be a great partner. He's the kind of person who would get in trouble deliberately just to gaze at his partner as they scold him for messing up. But he will also be the type to make sure the fridge is fully stocked and the dishes are done before going to bed.

In conclusion, Kim Taehyung is husband material who is definitely going to be a great dad.

Now, let's come to the second male lead, Doyun. I wanted it to be brutal to be honest, the love triangle. But I'm a very soft hearted person, I can't see people hurting nor write about them hurting and that's why it's very mellow.

But I did feel bad for Doyun a lot because firstly, he's an openly bisexual guy and had a crush on Aera for a long time but the woman ignored him a lot. Then she goes and agrees to date him, shares some hot moments with him only to hurt him in the worst way possible. Like, dude, come on!

But he was very important to show how ignorant and self centred Aera had been. He made her realise that and that's why she ended up treating Taehyung better.

Apart from this motive, Doyun really didn't have much to his character. He was just a normal guy in love with his best friend but he had a big hand in developing Aera's character.

And that, my friends, is how you do character development 💅

There's also a character named Cho Hwayoung who is a writer and uses a pen name. She seems to have some history too but that will be revealed in more detail in one of my upcoming books ;)

For now, I'll just tell you that her character is still under construction but she's someone a lot of introverts in the world can relate to. Also people who write.

Other than these base characters, there were all the other members of BTS but they obviously aren't as prominent in this book because they are all going to have their separate books. Sehee has her own book named After Hours. If you haven't read it, please do, it's very dear to me.

Coming to the main story, I made a lot of changes as I kept writing. I usually know the starting, ending and a little bit of middle part of the story before I actually start writing. But in this case, I only knew the starting, so the book ended up looking unfinished and unfiltered. Quite a disappointment if you ask me as compared to the other books.

But as I mentioned above, I'm glad I did the changes I did and explored my characters this way because understanding the intricacies of human nature is a big part of writing and growing as a writer. You need not have an extremely unique plot to write a good book. If you just show and explore your characters as you would do with yourself in reality, it can turn great too.

Personally, I think this book needs a lot of editing plot-wise but I don't mind as long as this experiment of mine taught me something. So, I'm not too salty about not giving my best but I will definitely try not to mess up my upcoming projects as I did this one. Because when I started this book, I had just finished After Hours and I love that book with my everything. I lived that book and I was really sad letting it go. And I wrote half of the book in that state of mind thinking I won't have time in the next two years and I need get all 7 books out by hook or crook and that's why, this blunder.

But it's okay. I hope you guys understand why and how this happened and how I'm beating myself up for not doing justice to the storyline. I do hope that this particular book doesn't dishearten you from reading my other well planned books. I also hope that somewhere you could relate with Aera and learn from it, learn from the way Taehyung supported her in everything and how she comforted him when he needed her. That is what love is. Supporting each other and learning good things. Its an endless process of growing up and discovering something on the path with someone to lean on by your side.

Lastly, since I don't have anything left to say about the book, I would like to thank each and every person who stuck to the end and read this book. Thank you so much for joining me on this journey of self exploration and relationship development. I really can't thank each one of you enough for supporting me with your votes and comments. I love you guys soooooooo much ❤️❤️❤️❤️

Special credits to all the amazing artists whose work I used in the book and got inspired from. Especially Zipcy who had the most influence on the way I visualised some of the scenes.

There is no particular playlist for this book, I just randomly put on any song but when I needed to get in a certain mood I listened to the following artists – RM, eAeon, Wheein, MonstaX.