((A/N: TRIGGER WARNING!!! Description of a medical procedure; needles and anaesthetic.)) 

Harry was able to move the next day when he woke up, though he had to use his walking stick to fly around, unable to put any weight on his legs. Recovery Girl had tried to get him sent to the hospital, but Harry insisted he didn't need to. It wasn't very convincing, but he was old enough and of sound mind, so they couldn't force him. 

"How are you holding up after yesterday?" Killian placed a mug of tea Lexsaidh brewed in front of Harry. 

"Alright, I wasn't really involved, there was just a dementor." Though Harry diminished what he felt, his hands shook as he tried to drink the tea. 

"The others told us how the planned kidnapping went, even if you knew it was planned that doesn't mean it was done well. You're not trained." Killian would have had to take a while to get over what was described by the others. 

When they had found out about the fake kidnapping plan, they were expecting either for the three of them to be made to fall asleep at a time they were told, and then picked up, or that they would be told exactly how they would be taken, who would be taking them, and then given something to make them sleep. 

As it happened there was little difference for Harry, Luke, and Dudley than if they were actually kidnapped. They still had no control or knowledge about the situation. 

"Well," Killian sighed as Harry looked down at his mug. "Just mention it to your mind healer, okay?" 

Harry nodded, he was already planning on it. He had been through worse, he had talked about worse, but it caused an odd sense of discomfort in him. It was planned, he had agreed to it, but he had left him feeling more powerless than he did before. That was without him coming to barely able to move from the pain. 

"Um-" Harry looked up suddenly, trying to figure out the words he should use. "I remember you saying you aren't a man, what did you mean?" 

"Hm?" Killian was a little surprised at the sudden change in topic. "I'm a demiboy. I use he/him pronouns, but gender wise I'm more like the neighbour of 'man'. It's like I can wear the clothes, but they don't fit very well. If that makes any sense." 

Harry nodded, rubbing the handle of his mug. 

"How did you find out?" Harry looked at his distorted reflection. Nico's words having been replaying in his mind. 

"Oh, I don't really know. I was reading stuff online and when I read about demiboys it just felt like it clicked." Killian shuffled his chair closer to Harry. "I would recommend looking into it online, you'll get far more information than I can give you." 

"Thanks." Harry sounded a little down, but Killian had done his best. 

The two sat in silence, Killian pulling out his phone and typing something. Harry's mind was still whirling. He still didn't know what made him comfortable in things as simple as clothes, how could he figure out gender. He was pretty sure he understood his sexuality; as he had never felt any attraction like that towards anyone. 

"Here, this is all about different people's experiences with gender, of most of the spectrum. It might be helpful, it might not." Killian passed his phone to Harry, the screen full of text. It was clearly supposed to be helpful for the people reading. 

----- 

Harry eventually gave in to having stronger painkillers, though he still refused to go to the hospital. It was a pain for the teachers, but Harry was once again reaching the point he could hardly move or touch his legs without excruciating pain. Even keeping his legs as still as he could they still ached like crazy. 

"Sorry Harry," Killian ruffled Harry's hair as he pulled on his jacket. "I have to get going. Behave for the teachers, yeah?" 

"I will." Harry tried to pretend he wasn't tense as he waited for the painkillers. 

Nico had arranged for Harry to be staying in the room he spends time with the trio in, officially for lessons, though honestly they hadn't been very structured. Nico had brought in some beanbags, one of which Harry was sitting on. It was large and soft, and took his whole weight. 

"Hey, look at me, you're going to be fine." Killian kneeled down, looking Harry in the eye and holding his arms. "I can't be here, but Raelyn, one of Nico's wives, will be here to keep an eye on you three. Besides, we chose this room because it's one of the safest here." 

"I wanna go home." Harry tried, and failed, to keep his lip from trembling. 

He missed Sirius' bark-like laugh, he missed how Remus would always smell of coffee, tea, and old books, he missed their warmth, he missed Hedwig, he missed the general hum of magic the house had. It had been building up over his time here, and as great as Killian was, he couldn't replace Sirius and Remus. Harry's pain was bad, he had been doing things he was more than a little apprehensive about, and he just wanted his Padfoot and Moony. 

"We'll get you back there, I promise." Killian's voice was firm, even as Nico's old words from when he started pursuing the life of a hero playing in his mind. 

"Never make a promise you aren't completely certain you can't keep, you hear me?" Nico had taken Killian to one side, he had just announced to the table he intended to be a hero, Lexsaidh having gone very quiet. "Giving people hope is good, but even with the best of intentions false hope is unkind, and can lead to them resenting you. Even when you aren't the one who caused their pain." 

Nico's eyes lingered on Lexsaidh. She was a prime example of their point, and Nico had never given her so much as a promise of her parents' life or safety. It was only recently she had accepted nothing was Nico's fault. The first week was a lot of screaming and door slamming. 

Harry nodded, but he looked away from Killian, his eyes red as he blinked rapidly. 

"I have to go now, but you will be fine." Killian was running on the late side now, but he sent a quick text to Raelyn as he left about how stressed Harry is. 

----- 

"Hello, I'll be taking care of you today." A nurse, dressed in blue scrubs, with short, green hair that waved in a breeze nobody else could feel. "First I am going to give you a general anaesthetic to help you remain calm, and make the next part easier, then I am going to give the strong local anaesthetic to your legs. You must not try to walk for the next day or two as your legs will be numb and you won't know if you injured yourself." 

Harry nodded, biting his lip as he tried not to let his hands shake. 

"You might feel sleepy, just let it happen. The point of this is to help you relax, okay?" The nurse smiled at Harry, a technician beside them setting everything up. "Which is your dominant hand?" 

"My right hand." Harry raised it. 

"Okay, I'm going to give you a cannula and we're going to use that to give you the general anaesthetic." The nurse took Harry's left hand with a gloved hand of their own, washing it carefully with antiseptic wipes. "Don't look, you're going to feel a scratch." 

Harry managed to keep his hand perfectly still as the needle was put into his hand, the metal in his hand definitely something he could feel. With warning, it was washed with a saline solution that felt cold. Then came the general anaesthetic with a name Harry didn't recognise. 

It came into effect almost immediately. Harry's senses deadened dramatically, his eyes catching patterns he hadn't seen before. They looked like snakes. 

"I need to pull your clothes back to clean the area and then give you the injection, is that alright with you?" The nurse mentally cursed themself for having forgotten to ask earlier. 

"That'sssss fine." Harry didn't realise he had slipped into Parseltongue, the snaking patterns tricking his brain into thinking he was talking to snakes. He was at lease nodding, which communicated with the nurse. 

The nurse used iodine to clean the areas, Harry trying not to flinch away from the cold gauze. Then a lighter anaesthetic was given in the area to allow for the deeper, stronger anaesthetic. 

"Now I'm going to do the first injection. Keep your legs still and try to remain relaxed. Don't look, now is the time to make it obvious if you want to hold someone's hand." The nurse's eyes were fixed in Harry's hip, but there were other people in the room. 

Harry put his hand out, one of the other medical personnel who came with the nurse taking it as the needle was used. Harry didn't even flinch, the careful precision with a thin, sharp needle after anaesthetic almost painless compared to what he used to face. It was so much less painful than just what happened at Hogwarts, it couldn't even be in the same realm of pain as what he got from the Dursleys. 

Harry got 2 proper injections in each leg.