It was almost Sunday evening when I finally heard a car pull up and what seemed to be a regular party emerge from it. A few seconds later, Jax and Ben filed into Chase's house accompanied by Alex and her son Joshua.

When I spotted her, I pushed myself out of my seat and flew into her arms, relief at seeing her and her son safe and sound practically giving me wings.

"Where's your mother, Alex? Is she safe?" I cried.

"She's with friends. Safe as houses." Jaxson answered my question in her stead. "Simon's cronies had Joshua. Big bulky guys with a pea-sized brain. Didn't take Ben and me long to get Josh out, pick up Alex and her mum and come here. They probably still haven't realised that they are missing a valuable item, their survival ticket, so to speak." He snorted before carrying on, "Luckily, Hayley is out of their shooting range for now." He took a deep breath, steadying himself against the doorframe. "I'd appreciate if everyone could stay here for a little while until I can finish what I started earlier. When it's safe for everyone, I'll let you know and you can get back to your lives."

He turned and walked off.

I sprinted after him.

"A word before you go, Jax?" He stopped and turned around, expression cold. I pressed on, "I know you don't love me; hell, you don't even know me. And it sounds stupid. We hardly know each other, but I do love you, Jax, and I don't want anything to happen to you, even if I'll never see you again. Take Ben with you, or let me come along at the very least. Please! You don't look so good. You can't do this by yourself, whatever 'this' is."

Jaxson pulled me into his arms. "You're an amazing woman, Tess. There is no one I'd rather spend my life with than you. But this is my family, my mess. I need to see this through, and I'm not dragging anyone else into this. I'm sorry."

The haunted look on his face told me that whatever "this" was, was not good.

"What are you going to do, and where are you going to take Amy? Please, talk to me!" I whispered.

"I've got to go!" Jaxson stated simply, gave me a chaste kiss on the nose and left.

"Ben!" I screamed, but, again, Ben wasn't forthcoming with his expertise knowledge on his friend. "It's family business. He didn't want me there," was all I could get out of him. Then he sat down and checked his watch every so often.

"Joshua, I'm Tessa, kind of... ah... a friend of your mothers." I dropped into the seat next to Alex's son when I realised that there was nothing I could do for Jaxson now. The poor kid must have been through hell. And Alex! Oh Jesus, just thinking about Hayley in the clutches of those goons made me break out in a cold sweat, even if they were amateur goons. I wasn't sure whether to be relieved or outraged that Simon obviously didn't think skilled operators were warranted to shut Alex or me up.

Josh confirmed that the last few hours had not been a walk in the park for him when he just nodded, refusing to make eye contact. But I had never met the boy before and thought working through this trauma was best left to another day and another person, like his mother.

I turned to what, if I stretched the definition of the term from New York to Berlin, would be called a friend of mine. I made a mental note to try and make more friends.

"Alex, are you okay?" I asked, not being able to hide a frown.

"I am so sorry, Tess! I know I lied, but I had to protect my son. I... I wanted to warn you. Honestly! But they had Josh!" A tear ran down her cheek. She swiped at it furiously to make sure Josh wouldn't notice how fragile his mother's emotional state was right now.

"It's not your fault!" I interrupted. "We... You were trying to do the right thing, get a little girl away from her abusive father. That's our duty. We are bound to do this by law, but so many people here in Blue Church look the other way because it guarantees them peace and freedom. You, on the other hand, fulfilled your duty, Alex. Then, you were protecting you son. You put him first. Good on you! I wouldn't have done anything differently, Alex, so stop beating yourself up over nothing."

Alex looked unconvinced but accepted a cup of tea, while Joshua drank some hot chocolate. I smiled when I saw the chocolate beard decorating his upper lip, giving me a chance to catch a glimpse of the boy he used to be.

After about half an hour, Ben took an envelope from his trouser pocket and handed it to me. "From Jax. Told me to give it to you now."

I accepted the letter with trembling hands and went into the hallway to read it in peace.

Dear Tess,

I'm not sure what is going to happen today. The only thing I know is that I will do everything in my power to keep you, Amy and our daughter safe.

It feels strange to talk about "our" daughter, and I would have loved to get to know her more than anything in this world. It is up to you whether you want to tell her about me after today. I totally understand if you want to shield her from the monster that her father is and his evil family.

If there was another way, I would not do this. But I have to act now because I don't know how much longer I'll be able to take care of things physically.

Whether I live or die today, makes no difference. We cannot be together, and Hayley has to stay away from me, too. I just hope that you'll hear on the news that Peinelt and Simon Bowers have been arrested or are dead. This will not have stopped organised crime in Blue Church, I know that. But it will take time for the organisation to rebuild itself. You will all be safe.

Don't worry about Amy. I have involved one of Alex's colleagues. Tell her thanks again from me for making this possible so fast. Once my brother is out of the picture, Amy will become a warden of the state anyway. I'm positive that with Alex's help she won't be in the system too long. But anywhere is better than where she is now.

Tess, I know I didn't say it back, but I do love you. Unfortunately, I'm not exactly a prize catch, and dying isn't the worst that can happen to me these days. No need to shed any tears.

I am so sorry for everything. Please, forgive me!

Love

Jax

Tears were streaming down my face, but it still took me a moment to realise what I was reading. This was essentially a suicide note. Jaxson was going to kill Peinelt and his brother Simon in cold blood, and he was hoping that one their bodyguards would get him in return.

"Ben, Chase!" I screamed at the top of my lungs and crashed into the living room. "We have to stop him. Please, it may not be too late yet. We can't let him do this."

Ben sighed and looked at the phone that Jackson had left behind before he asked, "Is he... He is about to get himself killed, isn't he?"

I nodded and told the two men, who professed to be Jaxson's friends, what I had just read.

"I don't get it!" I cried. "I know his injury is bad, and he's dealing with a lot of pain on a daily basis, but I'm sure his leg will get better. It's not the end of the world."

"It's the end of his Army career, Tess. That's not easy for Jax to deal with. An RTD is impossible, meaning there's no chance for him to return to active duty. And he's got less than two years left until he's done his 22 years. His plan was to stay on after that." Ben said.

To my relief, while we were talking, Jaxson's mates grabbed their jackets and headed out.

"Alex, Josh, stay here! Make yourselves at home. You've been through a living nightmare. Try and get some rest!" Chase commanded, before the rest of us filed out of the door. "Don't leave until it is safe! Oh, there's ice cream in the freezer, Josh. Feel free to eat it up, but remember you have a mother, too!" Ben winked at the boy, then rolled out the door.

"We'll have to take my car. It's hand-controlled. I'm a mean driver these days. The rescuing-the-idiotic-hero part I'll have to leave up to Big Ben here," Chase explained, as he expertly heaved himself onto the driver's seat and pushed his wheelchair behind the seat with his muscular arms.

Alex shouted out of the window after us. "You need the address. Jaxson told me because of Amy."

I could have kissed her when she shouted out the exact spot I was sure I'd find the man I had fallen in love with all over again, if I had ever fallen out of love with him to begin with. And Chase, for not hesitating to help out as best he could. I acknowledged Alex's help with a nod, then turned to Chase, saying, "Thanks for coming! But I still don't understand. Jaxson's still in the Army. He is still being treated, isn't he? His limp will get better, won't it?"

Chase looked at me in the rearview mirror, watching me get myself strapped in for a second, before he said, "Jax rolled the vehicle he was driving back to base in Afghanistan. I'll spare you the details, but he thought he'd seen a flash of some sort, swerved hard and went off the road. The car flipped. Everyone else got out with some minor bruising, but the vehicle had landed on the driver's side. Jaxson's leg was crushed. It was a real mess. Doctors were going to amputate at first but one amazing surgeon managed to save the leg." Chase took a breath. "Not sure if that was a good thing, though. Jaxson's been through at least 15 operations in as many months, and I'm not even going to talk about the pain he must be in constantly."

"But he can still walk!" I protested.

"But probably not for very much longer." Chase hung his head for a second. "You might as well know now. It's not just the leg. It took a while for the doctors to realise that something else was going on because everyone was focused on the leg, but eventually they found out what had caused Jaxson to see a flash. They ran numerous tests when they finally understood that it hadn't been PTSD, as they had originally thought, Jaxson having been a soldier for such a long time and all that, but a physical problem. Jaxson's eyesight kept deteriorating to the point that he was effectively blind in both eyes."

My heart sank. This did not sound good at all. What had Jaxson done to deserve all this? Wasn't being born into this appalling family, all the sacrifices he had made because of that and the accident that crushed his leg enough for him to deal with?

"Even then, Jax was told it was all in his head. He was referred to the hospital psychiatrist, whose preliminary diagnosis was that there was no mental illness involved. Eventually, after extensive testing, Jaxson was diagnosed with MS. That's multiple sclerosis, an autoimmune disease that causes your immune system to attack the protective covering around your nerves. It causes inflammation in the brain and in the spinal cord."

I stared at Chase, unable to wrap my head around what he was telling me.

"Jaxson doesn't really talk about it, but he opens up to me some. Maybe because... well... you know... because he knows that I get it." He sighed loudly, making my heart break for both of them. "Anyway, Jaxson told me that symptoms are different with everyone. In Jaxson's case, they are bad. Going blind in both eyes, especially so soon after the first diagnosis, is pretty rare apparently. He also experiences pain in his limbs and muscle spasms. The bloody disease hit him like an atom bomb. There is hardly any reprieve between flare-ups like with most other people. At the moment, it seems to be a downhill race, despite the myriad of drugs he's on. His optic nerve is so badly damaged already that he's lost 60 per cent of his eyesight in his left eye. Irreversible damage. Jax has always been active, physical. Moving is as essential to him as breathing. It keeps his demons at bay. He's running scared now that he might lose all that."

Another short pause, then he whispered, "And we should have done more. We are his friends, goddammit!"

"You did suspect something, Ben, didn't you? You told me he wasn't coming back." I tried to keep my voice gentle and the accusation out of it. Ben already felt bad, but I couldn't understand why he would have let it go this far.

Ben rubbed his neck. "Thought he was going to kidnap his niece, then go back to the barracks. I know what he was planning was dangerous and illegal, but I thought it was probably best for him."

He turned around to face me. "He'd been ridden with guilt since this phone call, informing him his niece had been taken to the hospital. He knew what was up, but couldn't help. Nearly crushed him. We thought it was the accident. He didn't tell us anything, you know. Anyway, he knows how to cover his tracks and he needs to sort his brother out, find something positive in his life. And I thought rescuing Amy would be it. I honestly didn't think he was suicidal. In all the time that he spent in the hospital, in rehab, dealing with this new disease, all the bad news he had to process about the MS, he never seemed to give up the fight."

My anger subsided when I saw tears glistening in this giant's eyes.

"He was always more concerned about me, dammit!" Chase interrupted. "Despite what I said earlier, things aren't always rosy, and I still have my bad days. I just don't want people to know. But Jax often knew anyway, often instinctively. He would phone me in the middle of the night, even when he was in the hospital himself, fresh from an operation, whenever he thought I needed him. He never let me down. He would also always smile and joke with me when I visited him in the hospital. I never even noticed that he was battling all these stupid feelings of guilt. He didn't tell me about his niece, obviously because he thought I had enough to deal with. I know what kind of a man the stupid idiot is." Chase's voice hitched. "But I've been through this shit myself. I should have known that the smile on his face was just veneer for the ugly and desperate inside of him. I should have seen it! Christ Almighty, why didn't I see it?"

Chase's car came to a stop.

"We're about a five-minute walk away from his brother's place. He'd have come here first to get Amy out." Chase turned to look at me, his voice steady once again. "Let Ben do some recon."

I shook my head vigorously.

"I've done everything you wanted me to so far, but not this time. I'm coming along, whatever you say. If we're not too late, you'll need me. I've got a trump card that you haven't got." When the others looked at me with a question mark on their faces, I added, "Hayley, our daughter."

"Jaxson is in an extreme situation right now. Dangling Hayley in front of him might not be the smartest move." Chase did not seem convinced.

"I'm not dangling my daughter in front of anybody, Chase!" I exploded despite the fact that I knew Chase was only trying to help. "But I can distract Jaxson, remind him that he's got something to live for by telling him some of the things he doesn't know about her yet. I can tell him about our life and assure him that he's welcome, at least in my life. And Chase, you also have a trump card. You can tell him that life with a disability is still worth living." I pointed my finger at him. "And you'd better be convincing, mate. So, get into your unmotorised vehicle and give it some arm grease. Let's roll, guys!"

Chase's face suddenly lit up. He grinned at Ben. "Dammit, I like her."

Then he hoisted himself into his wheelchair and rolled down the road right beside us.