I naturally wake up early and begin packing my clothes while listening to Beautiful, Loved and Blessed, trying to calm my nerves.

Suddenly, the music stops. I turn around to see my older brother grinning at me.

"Comment osez-vous interrompre Prince !? Pourquoi avez-vous d'éteindre la musique? (How dare you interrupt Prince!? Why did you turn off the music?)" I scream at him, my ears still adjusting to the silence.

"Parce qu'il était trop fort et si vous ne l'auriez pas pu entendre quoi que ce soit, comme lorsque le petit déjeuner était prêt. Et vous jouez trop Prince de toute façon. (Because it was too loud and so you would not have been able to hear anything, such as when breakfast was ready. And you play too much Prince anyways.)"

"Vraiment? Vas te faire encule! Tu dis toujours ça de ma musique. Tout cela parce que vous êtes jaloux de mes goûts et aptitudes génie. (Really? Fuck you! You always say that about my music. All because you are jealous of my tastes and genius abilities.)"

"What are you two arguing about now?!" my mom screams from down the hall.

"Nothing!" I scream back, staring daggers at my annoying brother, Claude.

"Vous avez de la chance, elle ne peut pas parler français. (You're lucky she can't speak French.)" he says before walking down the hall towards our living room/dining room.

"Yeah..." I whisper, sitting down on the edge of my bed, my thoughts taking me where I don't want to go.

"French is a beautiful language, Jazabella. You must learn it." he said as he tucked me into bed.

I feel tears coming to my eyes as I remember what my father told me. But I never understood why that specific language was so important to him.

"And you must remember that I will always be there for you, especially at the important times." he whispered before closing to door to my room.

Little did my young self know that that would be the last time I would see my father. 10 years ago.

5 months later, my younger brother was born, and all I could do was cry for him while holding him in my arms.

Ding! Dong!goes the doorbell, bringing  me out of my trance. For a moment, I let myself hope that it's him, coming home to apologize for leaving me and my family behind. I wander down the hall until I hear my Aunt B yell, "I got the door! Why don't y'all just leave it unlocked like we do back at home?!"

I sprint down the hall and come to a stop in front of my towering aunt, already in her fancy heels, "It's because we live in a city BB, and we don't even know our neighbors. And, thank you, but I'll answer the door."

I reach for the door knob just before BB's husband, Conny, reaches the door. As he heads back to the living room, I regain my composure and crack open the door.

"Who is i-- oh hi Jase!" I squeak, my cheeks reddening. In cases like this, I'm really glad I'm black.

"Hey." he said, chewing on his gum and leaning against the doorway.

"Who is this?!" Aunt B exclaims as she swings open the door.

I take a step between her and Jason, "um, Jase, this is my Aunt B -"

"Just call me BB."

I sigh with my head down, "-and BB, this is Jason Rufferwood. He lives down the street."

I begin to let out the breath I was holding in until...

"Well, although you said you don't know your neighbors, it seems like you two know each other enough I could see you two making a cute little black China baby." she says as she pinches my cheeks before turning around.

"BB!" I say, suddenly looking up, "Really? You just don't know. And FYI - he's Japanese and White. But you can't just go around saying that to people that you don't even know, and ...."

"Mmmmmm!" she shrugs with her hands up as she walks away.

I turn back to Jase, "I'm really sorry about that. I - "

"I get it."

I look up at him, only to see a small smile playing at his lips and a joking crinkle in the corner of his dark brown eyes, slightly hidden by some of his chocolate curly-tipped hair.

I let out a sigh of relief and step aside, "Why don't you come on in?"

No sooner did he step his beat up white Converse on the hard wood floor, my brother comes barreling out of the kitchen.

"Eeeehhhh! Long time not see Jase!" he says, taking him into a joking choke hold and ruffling his perfect hair.

"Hey Claude." he says, throwing a glance and a quick smile back at me before my older brother decides to let him go.

As he walks further into the house, my little brother comes around the corner yelling, "VI - O - LIN! VI - OO - LIIIN!

Jase picks up my brother and spins him around, resulting in a high pitched laughing scream heard throughout the home.

"Hey Jason" I tell my brother as Jase sets him down, "What's his name?"

"J-a-s-e. Jason! Jason! J-a-s-e. Jason! Jason! Eeeeeeees mi twine!"

I smile at my little brother's endless energy and limitless cuteness, "Yes, you two share the same name - he's your twin."

He tugs on Jase's jeans, "Violin? You have violins?"

"No violins today, but I do have this" Jases says, bending down to give my brother a finger drum set.

"No waaaaaaaay! Tanks Jase!" Jason screams before running back to his room.

"Don't tell me this means...." I say as I take a step in front of him.

"Yes" he says, brushing past me, sending tingles down my spine, "I have started playing the drums."

"My gosh, how many instruments is that now?"

He pauses just outside the kitchen, "hmmmmm.... The violin, base, guitar, drums, piano... Probably about nine so far. Ten if you include my wonderful voice."

"Ok, you have totally outdone me. I've only got three, the guitar, base and piano. Four if you count my angelic, soulful voice."

"Oh my goooosh! TOOO much artistic talent up in here! Can't y'all do something like play a sport?" my brother asks as he walks up behind us.

I turn to face him, "Um, if you remember correctly I did play sports. And I was far better at it than you will ever be."

"I'm better at hockey than you."

"Sure. But you can't dance, act, play soccer, basketball, tennis, softball, figure skate, swim, or anything else other than hockey."

"Well, Jase can't dance."

I laugh, "he dances far better than you, and he plays ten instruments."

"You wouldn't be playing anything if it wasn't for me playing the piano."

"Yeah right. You only knew how to play Mary Had a Little Lamb."

"Well, I take credit for getting you into music and-"

"No, it was you and mostly da-" I stop myself too late and the mood darkens instantly.

Jason shifts uncomfortably. He knows the story.

"What are you guys talking about now?" I hear a little voice ask.

We all turn around to the sight of my little sister, Ruby, staring up at us holding a plate of cookies.

"What's going on? Jazabella? BlueJase? Claude the Alligator?"

"Nothing Ruby. Why don't you go set those down on the table before you drop them?"

"Okay!" she says, skipping off towards the dining room.

I turn around to see Jason rubbing his arm as my brother walks by, "I can't believe she still calls you BlueJase."

"Claude! Why'd- Well she still calls you Claude the Alligator!"

My brother just flips me off before going to grab an extra chair for Jase.

I stop in the hallway and watch Jase sit down at the loud table full of smiles and laughter with the rest of my family.  I can't help but think that Jason is a part of the family. And he has become more important to me than almost any of my other, very few other, friends, especially after my dad left.  He's been there for me ever since I met him a few years ago and has been someone I have relied on a lot to help me get through the whole dad drama.

Especially since Claude and I are the only ones who really remember him.  Ruby was just one and a half years old when he left us, and Jason doesn't even know who his father is.

I laugh to myself. In one sense, I kinda regret naming my little brother after my best friend. But then again, I couldn't have thought of any person better or more inspiring.

I walk over and sit down at the table directly across from Jase.  When I look at the table, I see that my mother has really outdone herself with creating a delicious breakfast.  Head down, I begin to devour the scrumptious food, not knowing if they will have anything this good to eat at Southlake Camp.  As I eat, I can't help but feel like someone is staring at me.  I look up from my plate right into Jase's brown eyes and it takes him a second to realize that I caught him looking at me.  He quickly looks away, but not before I notice the red rising in his cheeks.

Eventually the looks turn into a staring game, and soon after, I lose, bursting into a fit of laughter, making Jason laugh too.  Soon enough, the whole table is giggling.

"Hey Jazara" BB says, picking up her finished plate, "Come help me with these dishes."

I stand up and head for the kitchen, just as I realize that her request is a trap.

I sigh as I walk into the kitchen to find BB leaning against the stainless steel sink with a smug look on her face.

"Does your mother know about this?" she asks, looking me directly in the eye.

I decide to play innocent and act like I have no idea what she is talking about, "Does she know about what?"

She gives me her 'stop shitting with me' face, "About you and that Jason kid."

"He's just a good friend BB. What's wrong with that?"

"I never said anything was wrong with it."

"Well what's the issue?"

"The issue is," she sighs with a small smile, "that you are in denial. And it is messing with you so much you can't even look him in the eye without getting that look on your face."

I look down, "BB-"

"-You two are just like how me and Conny were when we-"

"-BB! just leave us- I mean it- alone."

"All I'm trying to say is - wait your going off to that camp today right?"

I nod my head yes.

"All I'm trying to say is that you might want to come to some sort of resolve before you leave. A lot can change in a few months. Try to tell him something. From what I can see, you've got nothing to lose."

I go back to the table to pick up my finished plate, but Jason already beat me to it. He whisks past me with a smile on his face - right into the waiting trap.

I fumble around at the table until my curiosity gets the best of me.  I quietly walk to right outside the kitchen and try to listen in on their conversation.

"She's going off to that camp today, Jason. You might want to tell her something now. A lot can change in a few months." I hear my aunt tell Jase.

I listen to his slow inhale, "You really think so ma'am?"

"Please, call me BB. And yes, I'd say go for it. It might not turn out as bad as you fear."

As I hear Jase's footsteps approach, I flee down the hall to my room, not ready.  I close my door and lean against it, slowly sliding down until I can hug my knees to my chest, and close my eyes.

💠

Prince and I are in a staring game. Obviously, he wins because he never blinks. I look at my guitar below one of his posters (above) and feel it calling for me. I quickly stand up from my cramped sitting position, sending sharp tingles down my legs. I steady myself before walking over to my white cloud guitar, modeled after Prince's one and only in his movie Purple Rain. Picking it up, I begin to play, allowing myself to escape the pressing issues at hand. It's just me and my guitar and its music that flows from my soul to my fingertips to the sound resonating throughout the room feeding back into my ears.

Below is a picture of what her guitar looks like

I look up only to see that a little over an hour has passed, set down my guitar, and I smile at how the time flies when I'm doing something that I love. Seeing that I have a few minutes to spare, I pick up my 5SOS poster on my desk and quickly hang it up in one of the few open spaces on my poster, picture, and art covered walls.

"Un moment s'il vous plait! (One moment please!)" I respond to the knock on my door.

I open my door to a smiling Jason and immediately mentally face palm.

"Your mom just sent me to remind you that it's almost time to go and -"

"-Okay, thanks Jase." I say in a fake calm tone before returning to my bed.

I pick up my guitar and place it in my case before going to get the rest of my bags.

"Are you just going to stand there?" I ask him while zipping my bags up.

"Ummmm..."

"Whatever." I say, taking a deep breath and turning to face him.

"Are you really going to take that with you? Aren't you afraid it's gonna break or someone is gonna steal it?"

"Nope" I say popping the 'p', " I would never go anywhere for this long without it."

I stumble out my door, closing it behind me, and try to squeeze past him in the hallway. He takes one of my bags and follows me down the hall.

"Thanks, Jase -"

"SURPRISE!" everyone says as I enter the living room.

My sister walks up to me with the plate of cookies from earlier and motions me to bend down to her.

"Save some for me?" She whispers, handing me the small plate and giving me a hug.

"Sure Ruby."

I take a bite of one of the cookies, "Did you makes these Ruby?"

She nodded, swinging her arms back and forth.

"These are delicious. I can tell you are going to be one heck of a cook when you get older."

I wrap up a few more cookies and put them in my bag before handing the rest of the cookies out along with hugs and a few, slightly wet, eyes.

"Bye" I says, opening the door, "Thank you all so so soooo much. I'm definitely gonna miss y'all. Promise me you will take care?"

I look into the eyes of each and every person, resulting in a lot of nodding heads.  I smile quickly at the crowd, grab my bags, and walk out the door down the small path to the grey, cracked, uneven sidewalk where my dad taught me to ride a bike.

If you can ride it here, you can ride it anywhere. Never stop trying, even if it's hard at first.

"Promise me you will stop by and check on them at least once a week. Especially Jason, my mother, and Claude." I say, stopping to look up at Jason who followed closely behind, carrying a few of my bags.

"Sure, Jazzy. No problem."

I freeze as the Southlake Camp bus pulls up in front of my house.

"Um, I'm sorry, is it okay that I call you that? Jazzy?"

I contemplate the new nickname as I stare at the yellow shiny metal of the bus.

"Only you can, Jase." I respond, helping to pack my bags onto the bus.

"I have something to tell you-"

"-Bye Jase." I say, taking my guitar from his hands and giving him a quick kiss before flying up the stairs into the bus.

I take a deep breath as the doors hiss close.

I sit down in the front few seats, but not before I notice a small girl with a pair of drumsticks protruding out of her backpack, making me think of - you guessed it - Jason.

Turning towards the window, I offer a small wave and a smile to the blushing boy as the bus pulls away.

I laugh slightly to myself once he is out of sight, glad that he didn't come running after me.

I close my eyes and begin to drift off to sleep, grateful for the opportunity to get out of the city, and more importantly get away from the everyday reminders of my father.

I need some time to clear my head from the fog and to see above the clouds.

💠

Hello!

This chapter was about double the size of any of the other chapters before... I'm sorry if it took forever...I just had soooo much to right about her.

And yay for meeting over half of the cast of Camp. 

Also, PLEASE let me know if you see any other mistakes (i.e. grammar, punctuation, etc.)

Question:

What do you think of Jazara?

Don't forget to answer, vote, and comment. 🗣👍🏾💬

ATCAgainstTheCurrent ✨