Chapter 27 the Five of Cups reversed

Page of Pentacle reversed, the Five of Cups reversed, The Tower Reversed

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Lloyd sat on Rifle as Tim finished saddling Chester. Stepping up in the saddle, Tim hoisted a backpack on his back.

"Are you certain we should be taking those?" Lloyd asked.

"You heard Grandpa, if Grandma wanted our neighbor to read them, then she reads them." Tim blinked rapidly against his leaky eyes.

A bit of Fern's cancer escaped the treatments and hid in her brain. The pending loss of the McConnell-Ballard Matriarch made the last Christmas and New Year's the hardest one ever. Three days after they lost the Cow Ruby Rose in Cassandra's canyon, Tim came out to the ranch to find Fern sitting in Cordell's office putting the ledgers of bound letters in a pile. She told Tim to take them to Cassandra so she could learn everything about ranching life Fern didn't have time to teach her and introduce her to Lloyd, who was supposed to quit the Sheriff's Department to take over the ranch next summer. Cordell told him to do it before he carried her back to bed. Two days later, she was gone. It had taken over two weeks to arrange for the memorial because so many had to come from far away.

Lloyd's breath made crystalline puffs in the dry air. "I thought the canyon was Nick and his boyfriend's."

"I kept the secret because I was told to, sorry. They stay there sometimes, but honestly, the canyon is for Erin's sister Cassandra. Someone her roommate met online murdered her in Cassandra and Erin's grandmother's house. He didn't know she was home asleep with the flu. She heard her roommate scream and went to see what was going on. She found her dead." At Lloyd's look, Tim shook her head. "I don't know the details, but Cassandra was so sick, she was too weak to fight him off and he raped her. Her fifteen-year-old cat attacked him, and she escaped and hid. When he couldn't find her, the bastard posted a thing online for a popup house party and over a hundred people showed up. It was almost Halloween, and they thought the dead girl was part of the decorations. The party ruined all the evidence. The whole thing and the people who came after caused Cassie to develop Anthropophobia."

"Anthro? Like anthropology? She's afraid of culture?" Lloyd sounded confused then he reined Rifle, clicked loudly twice and heeled the horse so it jumped the cattleguard.

Tim did the same with Chester. Settling back into a walk, Tim continued, "Close, it's a fear of people. All people. She has panic attacks, the worst I've ever seen or read about. Grandma Fern has been making me visit her for a couple of years now. She's met Tank once, and besides the four from our family, she knows no one in Pagosa County." Tim stopped and looked down at the edge of the dirt track road around the ranch. "Except Audie."

"Molly's bull?" Lloyd looked confused.

Tim chuckled. "Audie is her most regular visitor. She even set him up a room in the garage with a memory foam mattress and feeders like a dog. She takes better care of him than Molly ever did." Tim laughed at Lloyd's incredulous expression.

"How is that possible?" Lloyd chuckled remembering how their half-sister slept in the barn with bull and laid the family's bedding on the floor of his stall so the bull wouldn't have to sleep in the dirt.

"You'll see." Tim grinned at him. They rode in silence, enjoying the quiet of the winter, Then Tim started, "Gawd, I hope we get some wet snow, or we are going to be buying hay all summer."

"I know. I hope we don't get a winter wildfire."

The sound of a helicopter echoed through the valley and they both turned to look toward the Tanner Ranch across the valley. A deep scarlet helicopter lifted off and flew toward Durango.

Lloyd asked, "How'd it go picking up the Bear from Selene go?"

"I'm still alive. She... I asked her if we could go to dinner to just talk, she told me no. That the girl who loved me was gone and the woman she was only knew how to hate." Tim sat back in the saddle, and it creaked. The motion made Chester stop.

Lloyd reined Rifle to a stop too. They sat unspeaking, looking around at the dry pastures and patches of crusty snow in the ditch. The regret swirled around them like an invisible blizzard. Finally, Lloyd said again, "I hope we don't get a burn."

A few minutes later, Tim bent down and unlatched the gate, he nudged Chester toward the post to latch it to so it would stay open. They rode the still snow-covered drive hidden in the shadow of the canyon walls into the box canyon. A small house sat on the highest part of the meadow with a small garage closer to them. The garage door was open and next to an older jeep SUV laid Molly's bull on a mattress.

"Mornin', Audie." Tim called out to the bull.

The bull blinked at them then stood up and nosed a spot on the wall. Tim chuckled as the door lowered while Lloyd shook his head. Dismounting, Tim tied Chester to a post. Lloyd followed suit. Tim pushed a button on a box by stairs on the deck. They waited.

"Should we knock?" Lloyd asked.

"She's probably in her studio. She is a professional voice and singer. They ran a high-speed internet line to the cottage just for her so she could work." Tim was about to push the button again when Cassie came to stand in the sunroom.

~~~

Cassie was almost finished voicing another chapter when the light by her door came on. Someone was outside at her deck. She closed her eyes to steady her nerves as she finished the current sentence. It took several minutes to finish the chapter and she prayed her voice hadn't changed noticeably as her nerves began to churn up the acid of fear in her stomach. When she finished, she saved the recording and put the file in the Editing Queue folder.

Her shaking hand opened the door, and she peeked down the hall. Beyond the doors, she could see Tim Ballard standing with another man who was as opposite Tim in appearance as night and day. Both were handsome, but where Tim appealed to her like a golden summer day in her meadow, the other was dark-eyed and dark haired like a Southern Italian man she had once met or perhaps Spanish. He was taller and broader shouldered than Tim, almost imposing. Listening to them, Cassie cowered in her house then she heard the other ask if they should knock. He seemed impatient but Tim refused.

"Tim is a good man. He would never bring someone here to hurt me," she told herself aloud, then made herself go into the sunroom that separated her home from the outside world.

"Hello, Tim," she pressed the button to talk.

"Hello, Cassandra. This is my cousin, Lloyd McConnell. He is a deputy with the Pagosa County Sheriff's Department. Grandma Fern wanted me to introduce him before he retires and takes over the ranch.

"Ma'am." Lloyd tipped his hat at her.

"She also wanted me to bring you the books of her letters to my grandpa during the war." He unsholdered the backpack and put it in the chair by the door then retreated to the steps.

"I... I finished the ones she sent a few weeks ago." Cassie chewed her thumbnail as her heart hurt with the familiar ache of grief. "How is she?"

Both men bowed their heads for a moment then Tim admitted, "She passed a week after you saw her."

They stood in silence then Tim said, "Have a good day."

"Tim, wait." She called out to them. Cassie's hands shook and she started sweating but she was determined to go sing for Fern one last time. "Is... I mean, how many are... I would like to come sing for her funeral," She blurted out the last in a rush.

Tim looked shocked and then shook his head, "No, Darlin'. It's Saturday. There's nearly one hundred-thirty family coming this evening for the service tomorrow and hundreds from the community, but if you want, I'll come back and get you when they are gone and take you to the cemetery on another day. I am certain my grandma would be happy to hear you sing again. I'll let Grandpa know."

"Thank you, Tim." Tears dripped from her cheeks. "I'm so sorry for your loss." She glanced again at Lloyd. "It is nice to meet you, Deputy McConnell."

"Do you want us to take Audie home?" Tim asked, hesitant to leave her in such a distressed state.

"No, he's fine... Unless you need him." She responded.

"No, he did his job last fall. Let us know how much we owe you for his feed," Tim reminded again but he knew she wouldn't, she never did, and he had just started setting the money aside to give to Erin and Nick so they could put it in the accounts she shared with her adopted brother. "Ruby Rose's calf is doing well. How is your arm?"

"It's healing. Thank you." Cassie hesitated then asked, "Tim, do... do cows grieve?"

Tim and Lloyd looked at each other then Lloyd answered, "Grandma Fern said they did." She jumped a little at the sound of his voice.

She shuddered but answered, "Okay, I was wondering because I think Audie is sad for Ruby Rose. Have a safe ride back."

Walking back to their horses, Tim stopped and pushed the button on the outside of the garage. It went up and he spoke to the bull, "Congrats, Miss Cassandra said you could stay."

The bull snorted at him and closed his eyes like he was going back to sleep. Chuckling, Tim hit the button to put the door down again. Then he got on Chester. As he and Lloyd rode out, she opened the door, grabbed the backpack of books and closed the door quickly.

"Damn, she's more skittish that Laurette was," Lloyd muttered as he rode beside his cousin.

"I hope Laurette comes back soon, I miss her bread. That dark and light rye marble loaf was the best." Tim declared as he pulled the gate shut.

"She won't be. Jackson's dad told Milli they found her car at a chop shop in Henderson, Nevada, and there has been no activity on her social media or credit cards. Her bank account still has her last paycheck and the money Milli put in it for her." Lloyd clenched his hands around his reins. "I am afraid she might be dead."

"Really?"

"Molly was so worried her going back to her abusive ex but after Halloween," Lloyd sighed as he admitted, "She was such a flight risk that we didn't even look for her when she left. She's been missing for six weeks."

"It's not your fault, Lloyd," Tim tried to reassure him, but he knew his cousin was driven to try to save everyone he could. "Do you want a nap before everyone starts arriving?"

Lloyd nodded, "These twenty-four-hour shifts are exhausting. Thanks for helping grandpa with the ranch."

"No problem. Any more leads on those criminals with the toxic pot?" Tim inquired but Lloyd was looking the other way. Tim squinted. "Is that a calf?"

They rode over, but it was just a plastic garbage bag caught in some brush. Lloyd dismounted and pulled it loose, wadding it up and sticking it in his saddle bag. "Wanna ride the herd with me? They are due to start dropping any day."

Tim looked up at the sky, "The weather is changing, maybe the barometric pressure will make them drop."

"Maybe" Lloyd answered, so they turned their horses and headed for the herd. "So, are you taking Audra out for Valentine's Day?"

"No, we are just friend. Are you taking Milli out on a date?" Tim eyed him and saw his jaw tighten.

"She agreed to an un-date."

"Un-date? What's that?" Tim inquired.

"It's when one person has fallen in love with another, but they won't date him because he's a still a cop." Lloyd pulled off his hat and rubbed his hair then put his Stetson back on.

"You'll be retired soon," Tim reminded. "And running the ranch with me."

"So we're doing this? We're running the ranch together."

Tim laughed but it was sad, "Do we have a choice? Grandma will come back and pinch our ears if we don't."